Crossing the Ice

by Jennifer Comeaux

  Chapter Ten

  My eyes slowly focused and adjusted to the daylight as I padded down the carpeted stairs. Oh, how I loved Sundays and being able to sleep past dawn. I moseyed into the bright kitchen and set my phone on the counter before pouring a heaping bowl of cereal. The house was so quiet since Sergei was at a competition in Germany with Stephanie and Josh, and the twins were spending the weekend with Em’s parents in Boston.

  Carrying my phone and the cereal down the hall, I headed for my favorite room in the house, the library. Em sat in one of the big leather chairs with stacks of CDs surrounding her and her laptop resting on her knees.

  “Morning,” she said.

  I flopped down on the leather couch. “What’s cookin’?”

  “I’m planning the Christmas show.”

  “Already? Aren’t we still in September?”

  “I know, but I got a late start last year and everything felt so rushed. The next two months will fly by.”

  I spooned some oat flakes into my mouth and chewed slowly. The last two months had flown by. Mark and I had been working tirelessly on perfecting every detail of our programs for our first competition in a few weeks in Paris. I could tango in my sleep now. My time spent with Josh at the restaurant also seemed to have passed quickly. I felt like the big hourglass from The Wizard of Oz was hanging over us, counting down the days until Josh had to move back to L.A. Our friendship had continued to deepen, and I’d continued to sense that somethin’ somethin’ simmering between us. But Josh had never made any kind of move, and as much as I knew that was for the best, I still couldn’t get him out of my head.

  “What do you and Mark want to skate to this year? This’ll be your last Christmas show.” Em’s mouth turned down.

  I curled my legs under me. “Maybe we can skate to ‘Blue Christmas.’ It’s kinda melancholy for the occasion, and my mom loves Elvis, so she’d be thrilled.”

  “I was thinking we can also have a group number with you, Mark, Stephanie, and Josh like we used to do with you, me, Mark, and Chris. We had a lot fun with those.”

  Skating with Josh? Best idea ever! Skating with Stephanie? Hell on earth!

  “It was fun because we all liked each other,” I said. “This is a much different situation.”

  “The four of you can find a way to work together. You’re the only senior teams we have, and I think it would be great to mesh your different styles.”

  The opportunity to skate with Josh was definitely outweighing the pain of sharing the ice with Stephanie. Mark would hate the idea, but I had the feeling Em wasn’t going to make this optional for us anyway.

  “Can we skate to ‘The Christmas Song’ by Nat King Cole?” I asked.

  It was my favorite holiday tune, and I’d always had a secret fantasy of dancing to it with a special guy. Skating with Josh to it would be the next best thing.

  “Sure.” Em typed on her computer. “Josh offered to cut all the music for me, so I’m making a list for him. I’ll put that on there.”

  While she continued typing, I picked up my phone and trolled Stephanie’s Facebook to see if she’d posted any new photos from Germany. There was one of Josh and her posing with their bronze medals. They’d skated very well, and I was starting to get nervous about competing against them at Skate America in November.

  “Is Josh still playing the piano at the restaurant?” Em asked.

  “Yeah, on Thursday nights.”

  “And Stephanie still doesn’t know?”

  I shoveled more cereal into my mouth and shook my head.

  “What’s up with that?” Em asked.

  I took my time chewing and swallowing. “He just wants to do his own thing without her coming around.”

  “I guess I can understand that since so much of their lives has been spent together.” Em picked up her mug of coffee from the end table. “You’ve gotten to know Josh pretty well, haven’t you?”

  I shrugged. “We talk at the restaurant.” And we text. And share long looks that make me crazy.

  “I’m glad you’ve become friends. Other than when we’re doing choreography, he’s so quiet at the rink.”

  “I think he still sorta feels like an outsider there. Not that you and Sergei haven’t made him and Stephanie feel like part of the group. But Mark hasn’t exactly been friendly, and his buddies have followed suit.”

  Em pursed her lips and sipped her coffee. “He’s such a sweet guy. Maybe working on this group number will break some of the ice between him and Mark.”

  God bless her. She was never going to give up on making the four of us a happy family.

  “The only thing that’s going to break the ice between them is all of us making the Olympic team. I might even hug Stephanie if that happens.”

  Em laughed. “I’m going to hold you to that.”

  “Just remember I said might.” I pointed my spoon at her.

  If all of us did make the team, I’d be so beside myself I’d probably hug everyone within a mile radius. I’d give Josh an extra-long embrace, and maybe it would lead to a kiss…

  I chomped hard on my cereal. The whole thing was a dream with slim odds of happening. Rebekah and Evan were two-time champs who wouldn’t be easily dethroned, so there was realistically only one place on the team available. I shouldn’t be thinking about a Team Cape Cod trip to the Olympics anyway. I had to concentrate on my own skating and making sure Mark and I earned a spot. Nine years of work were riding on it.

  ****

  “Two glasses of chardonnay coming up,” I said to Meredith and turned to the back of the bar.

  A mellow and not very demanding Friday night crowd had descended upon the restaurant, so I’d had lots of time to chat with Josh and Mrs. Cassar, who’d parked herself next to him. She’d already patted his cheek once, and I’d barely contained my laughter.

  I poured the wine and passed the order to Meredith before grabbing the bottle of merlot to refill Mrs. Cassar’s glass.

  “Joshua was just telling me about the Christmas show,” she said.

  I bit my lip but couldn’t hide my grin. Josh had told me only his grandma called him by his full name.

  “I’m almost finished cutting all the music,” he said.

  “That was quick.” I filled Mrs. Cassar’s glass halfway. “Em just gave you the list on Monday.”

  “There are only a few programs that have multiple music cuts, so it’s been pretty easy.”

  Mrs. Cassar took a sip of wine. “You’ll have to remind me when the show gets closer. I’d love to see it.”

  “You’ve never come to any of our shows before,” I said.

  “Well, Joshua invited me. He said you’re going to skate together.”

  Did the fact he mentioned that to Mrs. Cassar mean he was just as excited about it as I was? I’d started counting the days until our first practice.

  “Rehearsals should be fun considering how unenthused Stephanie and Mark are about this group number,” I said.

  “Why can’t just the two of you skate together in your own number? That’s what I want to see,” Mrs. Cassar said.

  Josh and I locked eyes, both seeking a response from the other. No way was I going to divulge how much I’d love to do a program just with him. He stayed quiet, too, and I would’ve killed to know if he was thinking the same thing.

  When the silence became too awkward, I decided to answer the question from a different angle. “I think our partners might throw a collective hissy fit if we did that.”

  I slid down the bar to tend to another customer, and Mrs. Cassar soon waved me back to her with her diamond-ring-covered fingers.

  “Dear, can you get me that appetizer I love? The mini crab cakes?” she asked. “Joshua, you’ll share them with me, won’t you?”

  He wiped his mouth on his linen napkin and glanced at his plate full of pasta. “I’m knee-deep in spaghetti here.”

  She squeezed his bicep. “You’ll work it all off skating and throwing your sister around.”

&nb
sp; I laughed as Josh’s face tinted pink. When I returned to them a bit later with her order, Mrs. Cassar was asking him, “How long have you and your sister skated together?”

  “Since I was eleven and she was nine. She was really tiny, so we used to play around and do little lifts on the ice, and one of the pair coaches at our rink saw us and told my parents we should try skating pairs.”

  “You must get along well to have stuck it out this long. My brother, may he rest in peace, wouldn’t have put up with me for five minutes much less years and years.”

  I pretended to organize bottles on the shelves while I eavesdropped on their conversation. It was a trick I’d perfected working behind the bar.

  “Off the ice we don’t have a lot in common, and we don’t agree on a lot of things, but on the ice we’ve always worked well together,” Josh said. “It’s the one place we speak the same language.”

  Yeah, because off the ice the only language Stephanie speaks is fluent Bitch.

  “If you skated with Courtney…” Mrs. Cassar said my name loud enough to make me turn my head. “You’d have a partner you got along with on and off the ice. Wouldn’t that be wonderful?”

  My cheeks grew warm, and I wished I could crawl under the bar. It was hard enough hiding my feelings for Josh without Mrs. Pair Matchmaker stirring things up. I peeked at Josh, and he raised his water to his lips, but I thought I saw him smiling behind the glass.

  “I need to check on an order,” I said and rushed to the kitchen.

  More of my barstools began to fill up, so I only caught bits and pieces of Josh and Mrs. Cassar’s conversation the rest of the night. Almost every time I passed them, Josh was laughing and shaking his head, undoubtedly at another gem from the old lady’s mouth.

  She left the restaurant about thirty minutes before closing, but Josh stayed until the last customer departed. He’d been doing that lately even on the nights when he wasn’t playing piano and was obligated to be there until ten o’clock.

  “Mrs. Cassar said she’s going to bring all the ladies from her book club to the Christmas show,” Josh said. “And she asked if she can come watch us rehearse.”

  I laughed and untied my apron. “She is so excited about this.”

  “I asked Em if I could help choreograph the group number, so I’ll see if you and I can skate together for a good part of the program.” He shoved his hands in his pockets and shifted from one foot to the other. “If that’s okay with you.”

  “Yeah, I’m…” Contain your gushing. “I’m cool with that.”

  I scooted into the kitchen to get my purse and sweater, and after I said goodnight to Meredith, Ronnie handed me a small takeout container.

  “Last piece of chocolate mousse cake. Enjoy it on your night off tomorrow,” he said.

  “Ooh, thanks. See you Tuesday.”

  I met Josh in the dining room, and he pointed to my container. “What you got there?”

  “Chocolate mousse cake.” I pushed open the heavy front door. “I scored the last piece.”

  Josh fell in step beside me as we walked toward our cars parked in adjacent spots. He was quiet, so when he reached over and grabbed my box, I didn’t realize at first what was happening.

  “Now I have the last piece.” He grinned as he held the box over his head and jogged ahead of me.

  “What are you…” I set off after him. “You can’t take my cake!”

  He darted between our cars and continued to hold the container high in the air. “If you can reach it, you can have it back.”

  I jumped up but didn’t have nearly enough hops to reach the end of his long arm. He took a couple of quick steps to evade me, and I put more spring into my feet to jump higher. On my second leap, I lost my balance and fell forward, and Josh caught my waist with his free hand, pinning me against him.

  Our eyes met, and my heart pounded hard. The intense way he looked at me stole my breath. His lips parted, and his gaze traveled slowly down to my mouth, filling me with anticipation. I couldn’t think of anything except how much I wanted to feel his lips on mine. My whole body yearned for it. His arm tightened around my waist, and I leaned into him, aching more every second he waited to kiss me.

  He looked into my eyes, and as soon as he did, he backed away. A heavy weight pushed on my chest, and I felt like my thirteen-year-old self, being rejected by Josh all over again.

  “If this um… if this drops on the ground, no one will get to eat it,” he said with a forced laugh.

  He gave the box to me, now avoiding my eyes. I clutched it with both of my shaky hands and looked down at the pavement.

  “Have a good weekend,” he said.

  My throat was so tight I couldn’t speak. I just nodded and quickly dug in my purse for my keys. The search seemed to take an agonizing year, and when I finally retrieved the keys I flung myself into the driver’s seat and tossed the cake onto the passenger side. Throwing the car in reverse, I turned the wheel hard and sped out of the lot.

  The first two blocks I steeled my jaw, willing myself not to cry, but the hurt strangling me was too much to hold inside. My breath came out in gasps as tears streamed down my face. I swiped at my blurry eyes so I could see the road, but they just kept filling with water.

  I’d tried to accept that nothing would ever happen between us. I’d told myself that I just had to deal with my feelings while Josh was around, and when he’d leave the Cape I could get over him. But none of that logic had mattered when I was pressed against him and he was looking at me with so much desire. I’d never felt so strongly about anyone. I’d wanted him to kiss me more than I’d ever wanted anything in my life.

  Chapter Eleven

  “Coco, what movie we watch?” Quinn asked as she climbed onto the sofa next to Alex.

  I crouched in front of the large built-in entertainment center and inserted the DVD into the Blu-ray player. “My favorite movie of all time, The Wizard of Oz.”

  “Do it have a princess?” Quinn asked.

  Hmm… Glinda is a witch, but she looks like a princess…

  “Sorta,” I said.

  “And animals?” Alex mimicked a tiger’s claw and let out a little roar.

  I pressed Play and sat on the couch beside Quinn. “It sure does. There’s a cute little dog named Toto and a big lovable lion.”

  “You sit in middle,” Quinn said and crawled across my lap.

  I put my arms around the twins and snuggled them close to me. I was so happy to be babysitting instead of working at the restaurant. After spending the day thinking about nothing but my near-kiss with Josh the prior night, I needed a movie escape badly. I couldn’t stop wondering if Stephanie had been right about Josh playing me. What if it was all a big game to him? What if he and Stephanie were in cahoots to mess with my head?

  “Why it have no color?” Quinn said as the opening credits rolled.

  “It’s very old. Even older than your grandparents.”

  Alex’s mouth opened wide. “Dat’s really old.”

  They had lots more comments as the story began (“Dat man have a big nose!” “Look at da pigs!”). When we reached the part when Dorothy was about to sing “Over the Rainbow,” I patted their heads.

  “This is a really pretty song, so let’s be quiet and listen, okay?”

  I tried to see only the black-and-white image of Dorothy singing on the farm, but my mind kept picturing Josh playing the song on the piano. Every time he did, he’d look over at me behind the bar, and his eyes would crinkle with his gleaming smile. Once he’d waited to play it as the last song, and I’d given him a hard time, saying I’d been anxious to hear it all night. He’d leaned toward me, his blue eyes shining, and he’d said, “You know it’s true what they say. Good things come to those who wait.”

  Quinn whimpered and buried her face in my side, and I checked back into reality. The villainous Almira Gulch was riding her bike across the TV screen.

  “She scary,” Alex said and mimicked Quinn’s position.

  Qui
nn peeked at the TV with one eye. “I don’t like her.”

  I caressed their silky hair. “She’s only in some parts of the movie. There are a lot more happy, pretty parts.”

  Their tiny hands clung to my pajama T-shirt, but they faced the TV again. They were silent during the tornado, but the moment Almira and her bike transformed into the Wicked Witch and a broomstick, Quinn screamed and both she and Alex clambered onto my lap, quivering with fear.

  Crap, they’re probably going to have nightmares for months.

  My mom had let me watch the movie when I was three years old, so I’d thought the twins could handle it. Em was going to kill me.

  “It’s okay. I’ll turn it off.” I reached around them for the remote on the coffee table and shut off the DVD player.

  They squeezed their arms around me and each other, and I hugged them and kissed the tops of their heads. “Why don’t we watch Winnie the Pooh? I know that’s your favorite.”

  It took some coaxing for them to let go of me, but I eventually extricated myself and switched out the DVDs. We watched Pooh and his pals frolic through the forest until the twins started yawning and rubbing their eyes.

  “Time to get ready for bed,” I said.

  After I made sure they properly brushed their teeth and I tucked them into Alex’s twin beds, I went back downstairs and stretched out on the couch. Clicking through the TV channels with the remote, I spotted Pride and Prejudice and had to stop even though I’d seen the movie at least fifty times.

  My heart began to feel heavy again as I watched Lizzie and Mr. Darcy exchange longing looks. All the smiles Josh had given me, all the times I’d caught him staring at me while I waited on customers at the bar… had they really been just for show? How could I have been so wrong about what I’d felt between us?

  I hugged one of the green throw pillows and curled into a ball. I needed something sweet. Chocolate. My piece of cake!

  I shuffled in my big furry slippers to the kitchen and took the cake from the refrigerator. As I carried it to the sofa, I tasted a dollop of the icing with my finger. I was ready to dive into the rest of it with my fork when the doorbell rang.