He shifted his body, moving me with his hands so I could keep his cock trapped where it was. But in seconds I was on my back, his mouth on my pussy and his huge cock still in my mouth. He rocked his hips gently, careful not to go too far… but his mouth punished my clit with everything he was holding back. His lips worked me hard, his tongue reached up inside me. He held my ass in his hands, pressing me to him relentlessly as he built me up to the edge. Just as I came, he slipped his cock from my mouth, letting me cry out as it hit me. But even before it had finished, I felt something deep in my belly… an emptiness that only he had the power to fill…
"Fuck me," I begged, grasping at him. "Oh, Jack...I need you to fill me up and fuck me now…"
He had me on my knees in a fast second and buried himself in me with one hard thrust. I bent forward, arching my back, my body begging him for more. "God, yes… just… fuck… me…"
He rocked me with his thrusts, pounding his full length into me. There was no thought, only pure need and the undeniable force of desire. My breasts shook with every jolt. He leaned into me and took them in his hands, feeling their weight and their movement as he took me. He was swelling with every thrust and I could feel his huge head buried high and deep in me. Neither of us had much time left…
Then, after one last deep thrust, he pulled out. My whole body cried out with the loss of him. But he turned me onto my back and let his cock pound against my hip, slowing himself so he could kiss me… I could taste us both on his lips.
Sliding his body along mine, he let the heat of his cock find its way, slowly now… more gently. What had been the hard driving fuck I'd begged him for, was changing now. Into something else. Something I wasn't even brave enough to name. I spread my legs, lifting them high, opening myself to him… I'd never felt so free… or so totally vulnerable.
"I want you like nothing I've ever wanted…. Need you like nothing I've ever needed…" His words were sweet in my ear. Everything in me wanted to believe it was true. That I could be enough, just as I was. He made me feel like… just maybe… it could be true.
"My beautiful, beautiful wife." He buried his face in my breasts and I wrapped myself around him. He slid into me gently this time, filling me until the tears ran from the corners of my eyes.
But there was no patience left in either of us. We moved together, building fast with a need that drove us both. There was no more waiting, no more holding back. I clutched at his back as my orgasm hit, feeling him empty himself inside me. With every stroke, he pulsed his seed.
We held on, as everything in the world shattered but us.
He reached over to tuck my hair behind my ear. It was a simple gesture, but I'd grown so used to it. I rested my head on his chest, holding on for as long as I could, to the warm, safe feeling I had in his arms.
We had spent the entire afternoon together on the beach, naked under the trees. No matter how much we gave, it was never enough. I couldn't get my fill of him. We'd given up the pretense of going to our separate rooms, so when the light had faded, we'd climbed the stairs to his room. Even now, I could feel his cock stirring, ready for more.
He eased himself down along my side until his mouth reached my nipple. He teased it lazily with his tongue. He wrapped his hands around my whole breast, pushing the nipple up, sucking… nuzzling… "God, sweetheart… you were made for this…"
He took his time, giving both my tight, aching nipples the attention they needed. He ran his hands over me, just taking in the feel of my skin. It felt like he wanted to know me, just by touch… the way I might explore a sculpture with my own hands. I touched him too, letting our pleasure build more slowly now, more deeply than before. We had the whole night ahead of us…
"Libby, my beautiful girl," he pulled me on top of him and took my face on his hands. He kissed my mouth… my cheeks… my forehead. My breasts were huge soft mounds on the hardness of his chest and I had his heavy cock trapped between my thighs. "I wish we could stay here like this… just like this…" He kissed me again. "I know I promised we could stay the whole month, but…"
"What is it, Jack?" I pushed back to see his face. "What's happened?"
"Nothing, probably…" He played with one of my curls. "But I should fly back, just for a day or two. To get the Warner deal done." He frowned. "I should have finished it before we left. But I had… other things on my mind…" He rolled me underneath him.
"You could come with me, if you like. Moki, too." He rubbed his erection against me and I felt another wave of hunger roll through me. "It's just about time for you to take your first test too… If you come with me, we can have it done in the clinic. And be absolutely sure." He slipped inside me easily and I arched against him. "That you've got my baby inside you, sweetheart…"
My body responded to his shamelessly, all the while my mind racing. I was terrified to take another test so soon, afraid that it would still be negative. Only the clinical insemination had been during the right time of the month for me to conceive. What were the chances of getting pregnant after that? No matter how amazing it was.... making love to this beautiful man…
I held on, meeting every thrust of his body with the forceful need of my own. He held me, kissing me, devouring me, pushing me to beyond my limits. I don't know which drove me hardest… fear or desire. But I gave in to them both. And when he looked into my eyes and thrust inside me with everything he had, he made his demand.
"Come with me," he ordered. "Now." He thrust again hard. "Now."
And I did.
The contract Spencer had promised Jack was waiting in the fax machine by morning. But he'd already set the trip back home in motion. The pilot, Davis, would be here with the helicopter within the hour.
"You're sure I can't convince you?" He poured me a glass of orange juice and heaped my plate with scrambled eggs. "Moki's in perfect health, aren't you girl?" He rubbed her ears and she squirmed with delight. "They can take care of her here, or she could come with us." He put his hand over mine, his eyes serious. "I don't like the idea of leaving you here alone."
I finished my juice and felt my stomach turn uneasily. "I won't be alone, Jack. There's staff on the island. And you'll only be gone for a day or so." I swallowed as liquid pooled in the back of my throat. "We'll be fine here. I'll rest and I can work up in my studio." I smiled reassuringly. "You're going to be busy in the office anyway. You do still have a company to run…"
He finished his breakfast and cleared the dishes away. He smiled at my uneaten eggs, his eyes bright, hopeful.
"You'll call me, if you need me… if there's anything at all…" He held my chin. "And we'll take that test just as soon as I get back." He kissed me easily, his eyes so warm, so trusting. "I can't wait for you to tell me I'm going to be a father."
"I promise," I replied, nodding firmly. "I think I want that almost as much as you do…"
He took my hand, the one with the emerald, and kissed the back of it. Then he turned it over, and kissed the center of my palm… His mouth was so warm, there was something so intimate in the gesture. I fought back the tears that stung the backs of my eyes and forced myself to give him the bright smile he deserved.
He smiled back and kissed my lips, quickly, lightly. Then he reached for the overnight bag waiting by the door. We could hear the helicopter in the distance… he needed to be waiting by the pad.
"Libby… I want you to know, I…"
He stopped, his eyes intense, half a breath paused, the waiting words unspoken.
"I'll be back before you know I'm gone, sweetheart. And if you need anything, I'm a phone call away." He kissed me and put his hand gently on my belly. "Take care of yourselves," he smiled.
I followed him out, waiting at a distance he boarded and the helicopter slowly took off. I watched until it was nothing but a speck in the sky. Only a moment later, it was completely gone, and the tears I'd held back were set free.
33
Jack
I'd damned near told her how I felt. That I loved her. That I
wanted us to be a real family together. That I'd seen more than enough, watching how she'd cared for Moki, to know what a wonderful mother she'd be. If she could only believe in herself… And if it was what she really wanted…
Thank god, I'd stopped in time. There was nothing to gain by overwhelming her now. Her body was already going through so many changes… I thought of her uneaten breakfast… how emotional she was becoming. And how passionate and demanding she was in bed…
I felt a wave of hard desire run through me and had to force it aside. It was good I hadn't told her. As much as I hoped that her feelings might change as the pregnancy progressed, I had to accept… at least for now… that she'd made herself perfectly clear. She had no desire to raise a child. And when he was born, she was still planning to leave us both behind. Nothing had changed…
I watched the clouds drift by as the chopper headed for the coast. We'd land in Jacksonville, and from there I'd take the private plane into Asheville. The finished contract Spence had faxed to me was still unsigned. But he was waiting for me at the office, along with Bill Jackson and Ed Wyler of Warner Aluminum. We would wrap up the deal in person today. I had a hundred details to take care of, but my laptop was still in my case. All I could think about was Libby.
Had I gone too far, when I'd had my lawyer look further into Libby's history? I felt a pang of guilt, but what was done, was done. The report was waiting in my desk. I only had to decide whether or not to read it. Then, whether or not to share it with Libby…
I knew what I was hoping for. And I knew the chances were slim to none that the report would hold the power to change anything… but it was a chance I had to take. Whatever it said about Libby's birth mother, I could only pray that it held the power that I did not. The power to open Libby's heart to me.
"What the fuck do you mean, they couldn't be here?
Goddamn it, Spencer." I raked my hands viciously through my hair and turned to face him. "Bad enough you faxed me a fucking contract without the goddamned signatures you promised. Now I left my wife alone on our honeymoon, for a meeting you failed to produce? Christ, Spencer," I threw the papers onto my desk. "What the fuck am I paying you for?"
Spencer stood, his face ashen. "I did my best, Jack. Honest to god. But Ed flew out of the country this morning, until the fifteenth. And Bill's daughter is in labor…" He looked up at me and I saw beads of sweat lining his upper lip. "But I got this copy signed," he pulled a folder out of his briefcase and held it out. "Both of them… this morning… It only needs yours, and it's a done deal."
I flipped it open, taking my time with every page. I put my feet up on the desk and let Spencer stand… The signatures were there, all right. At least he'd managed that.
Forty-five minutes later, I looked up and nodded. Spencer's chest heaved with relief. I didn't fucking like how this had played out, but the contract was perfect. He hadn't missed a single detail. I scratched my signature out, page by page, until it was complete.
"It's good, Spence. Damn good." I reached out to shake his hand. "I'm sorry for doubting you." I clapped a hand on his back and felt him sag, just a little.
"I did what I had to, boss. I fucking promised you, and I did everything I had to… I'd never let you down, if there was any way in hell not to."
I laughed and poured us each a drink. Though I'd have preferred handshakes to seal it, we'd made the deal, and Mason Steel would be moving forward into the future with the strength of Warner Inc. alongside it. We were both powerful as hell before. Now we'd be unstoppable. And stock sales for both companies had been soaring for the last few months. The future of our family, of my family, was safe for generations to come. It was what I'd always wanted.
Spence and I headed for the boardroom together. I'd had Veronica arrange for the catered spread. One by one the rest of the family trickled in, as their schedules allowed. By three, we were all there and the champagne was flowing.
"Shit, Jack," India refilled my glass and hers. "You know, I was never really convinced it would happen. But we're here. The whole family… all those years of work finally paying off." She lifted her glass. "To Jack. And to his new wife, Libby." Her eyes sparkled and she turned her glass toward Blake and Janet. "And to the newly engaged couple…
To Reid, who held my hand while I learned the company, and Bennett, who's been a rock for us all. And to Mom and Dad, the foundation of our family, who loved each other for the last thirty-four years and still had enough left for the rest of us…" She held her glass higher and we all did the same.
"To a bright and promising future. And to the new generations of the Mason family, soon to come."
The party continued through the afternoon. Ronni had outdone herself. There was a superb lobster frittata and bowls of Wellfleet oysters on ice. The whole family was together. It was all perfect. Except that Libby wasn't beside me.
"Jackson, honey," Mom came over to kiss my cheek. "I can't believe you came all the way back for this. And I can't tell you how proud you've made me." She gave my arm a squeeze. "But you didn't bring your brand-new bride along with you? People are gonna say I didn't raise my son right…" Her eyes were bright, teasing. "How is Libby, honey? And how are the two of you settling down into married life?"
"Libby is beautiful…," I replied. "Every day she shows me a new side of herself… She's the loveliest woman I've ever known…"
Mom reached up, her eyes wise, and smoothed my hair back. "Of course she is," she said softly. "Isn't that exactly why you married her…?"
Maybe it was the relief of having finished the deal. Maybe it was the champagne. Or maybe it was how much I was missing Libby. But I was suddenly tired of having secrets. "Mom, I… There's something I should tell you. Something about Libby and me… something that you don't know…"
She smiled the way mothers do, and touched my cheek. "I don't believe there is…
You're in love with her, aren't you Jackson?" she asked easily.
"But it's not that simple…" I started.
"You love her." Hers was a statement this time, not a question.
"I do, more than anything."
"Then there really isn't anything else that matters… now is there?"
34
Libby
Take care of yourselves, he had said as he left. And the words had haunted me during the long night without him.
He was so sure I was pregnant. And I was terrified that I wasn't. I hadn't had the nerve to take the test again. It was true, my cycle was a little late, but the whole last month had been such a rollercoaster. That could very easily be the reason…
I'd spent the whole day walking around the island with Moki in my arms, feeling the sand under my feet, looking out over the crystal blue water. I missed Jack so much… My whole life I'd been mostly alone, but I'd never really felt lonely until now. But it was for the best that he was gone. And that I'd had time away from him to think. What had started out as so simple between us had gotten so complicated, so fast. We'd been so foolish, thinking a simple contract could have prevented this.
The truth was, Jack and I were both in too deep. The chemistry between us, sharing a bed, sharing our bodies… I felt heat rising from my core just at the memory. We loved each other's company, but when we touched… we turned into one body, flowing like molten liquid, filling each other until we were both a single whole. It was the kind of thing I'd never really believed in, until I'd felt it for myself.
He had married me, but only for appearances' sake. Then we'd pretended it was real until we had acted like it was real. We'd both given in. And now it would be all too easy… far too easy, not to stop…
But neither of us wanted a relationship. We'd let things get personal, when it should have stayed all business. Now I wanted more, but there wasn't any place for more. Not in his life. Not in mine. I put Moki's squirming little body down, keeping her close and safe on her little leash. She looked up at me, cocking an ear.
I had to tell him, and the sooner, the better. If I really was
n't pregnant, it wasn't right to keep it to myself any longer. And if he wanted to find a different surrogate, it would be easier to end our agreement now. He'd get his baby all the sooner. And neither of us would get any more attached than we already were…
It was painful to admit, even to myself, but I had already started to love my Little Speck… at least when I'd believed in her. I'd even imagined being her real mother… baking cookies… kissing her hurts. And maybe that's what scared me most. Because it was then, that I always remembered the sort of childhood I'd had. She deserved so much more…
And to go on for even a few more months like this with Jack…? It already felt damned near impossible to imagine living without him. He was all the things I'd never had… He was loyal and loving, kind and dependable. He was also the best friend I'd ever had. The only person I'd ever allowed so close. I felt sick at the thought of losing him…
If I stayed, maybe I could eventually gave him the child he wanted. But how would I ever be able to leave him? How would I ever be able to leave them… as I had promised to do?
And if I tried to keep him, without giving him a baby, I would have taken from him the one thing he wanted most…
The light was starting to fade, but I couldn't face going inside alone. Not just yet. I sank down onto the white sand and put my aching head in my hands. Moki curled up in my lap, whining softly for me to stroke her.
No matter how I looked at it, the answer always was the same. And there was no point in putting it off. No point in making it any harder than it already was. The puppy fell asleep as I caressed her little ear. Her breathing was soft and steady. One sure thing in a world that suddenly felt so frightening.
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