Poison Hearts

by Brenda Thomas; Shirley Dicks

  What did you do that for? He sputtered and wiped the water from his eyes. She was laughing so hard she couldn't get her breath.

  "You looked so funny and amazed that I'd do that." She laughed.

  "Yeah, but remember payback is a killer."

  "Thanks for the warning," she continued laughing as he climbed out of the tub, removing his wet clothes.

  Soon Rusty carried her to the bedroom where he gently put her on the bed.

  "I love you so much," Rusty said laying down next to her. “I know this may not be the best time, but I ah.. I ah want you to be my wife,” he stuttered

  "Oh yes...yes. I love you too,” she whispered straining her body to his. For the next hour they were lost in ecstasy and then fell asleep.

  Rusty awoke to find Maureen gone from the bed. Getting up he walked to the living room where he found her curled up in a ball, sweat running down her face, sitting cross legged on the floor. She was swinging back and forth, tears running down her face.

  "Darling, why didn't you wake me," Rusty asked taking her in his arms and holding her tight. He knew it had begun and he felt pity for this woman he loved.

  "I didn't want to wake you up Rusty," she sobbed. "I knew it would only get worse and you'd need your sleep. It hurts so bad and I don't know if I can take it. Oh God why did I ever start using." Maureen looked like a sixteen-year-old girl, with her make up off and she was so vulnerable.

  Rusty held her, then asked if she'd like to walk around outside. Perhaps the air would help a little.

  "I'll make us a cup of coffee and we can walk down by the water. You can cry, scream or whatever you feel like doing. If it gets too bad I have some medicine to help you through it." Rusty got up and held out his arm to help Maureen up from her place on the floor.

  "Ok Rusty just don't give up on me. Even if I say things that are cruel or hateful. I don't mean them. I want to get off these damn drugs and I can't do it without your help. I want you to know that I don't want to stop even if I say I do, so don't let me stop, no matter what. Promise me."

  "I promise sweetheart. We're in this together and remember how much I love you. I know we're in for a couple of bad days, but we can make it. You're not alone in this. In addition, when it's over, we'll have the prettiest wedding you ever saw. Keep that picture in mind and know I'm always going to be here for you." Rusty put on the coffee and kissed her lightly.

  "I love you Rusty. I don't ever know how I could have thought money was the answer to everything, and I know I was a bitch at times but at least now I'm sure of what I want. I want to be your wife even if you don't have money. I’m going to try to do this without using any more drugs to get me off it. I think that would be the best way, but if I can’t, then I will take some."

  "Let's take the coffee outside where it's cooler. It's so beautiful down by the water. Look, there's a full moon out there, almost as if this night was made for us."

  Maureen doubled over in pain and let out a long scream.

  "Oh God help me. Help me to bear this." Rusty took her in his arms spilling some of the hot coffee on the floor until she straightened up.

  "It's okay now." Maureen took her cup of coffee and together they walked down by the water and sat down under the moon. It glistened on the water and the sounds of birds and occasionally a fish jumping out of the water sounded in the night.

  "I love it here Rusty. I hope someday we can come back here when I'm in a better mood. Maybe for our honeymoon we can borrow this camp again. That is if your friend will let you."

  "I'm sure he wouldn’t mind but I thought you would want to go someplace exotic for our honeymoon."

  "Well the old me would have wanted to go to Paris, but the new me wants to be alone with the man I love. And what better place then where I conquer this monkey on my back." Maureen leaned back on Rusty's shoulders and closed her eyes. She never realized how much beauty existed in the country until she came here. No cable tv, no tennis courts or maids, just simply the sounds of nature all around, soothing and calming her shattered nerves. She never dreamed of the peacefulness that was filling her soul here, a peacefulness she had never known. It was as if a new woman was emerging from the very depths of her soul.

  That night Rusty had to lock her in the bedroom as he tried to hold her tight.

  “I hate you, give me some drugs. I can’t do this Rusty, please give me some coke. I need it.” Maureen kicked Rusty in the shin as she fought him trying to get away.

  He held on, talking in a soothing voice.

  “You don’t want that Maureen. You can do this. You told me not to listen to you and I can’t give you drugs. I love you sweetheart, just hold on.”

  Rusty felt tears welling up as he held her down on the bed. She was a strong woman and she was fighting him for all she was worth. He had known it wasn’t going to be easy, but the pain he felt as he watched her suffering was almost more than he could bear. He almost gave in but found the strength to keep going.

  It had been a long hard four nights with crying, screaming and lashing out at Rusty, but she felt so much better on the fifth day. She took a bath and washed her hair, wrapping it up in a towel and came out to the kitchen where Rusty was fixing a good hearty breakfast. They had been through the roughest part of the week. The pain was almost over.

  Maureen didn't feel wonderful, but at least she had weathered the first four days without drugs. And she had done it without any of the medicine that Rusty had brought along just in case she needed it.

  "Glad you’re feeling better sweetheart. I know this has been a rough time for you, but I knew you could do it. I'm proud of you." Rusty put the plate of bacon and eggs down in front of her and watched as she hungrily began to eat. That was a good sign. He was so glad it was over.

  "I can never repay you Rusty for being here. With your help I'll never touch that stuff again. Christina will be so happy for us. I can't wait to tell her."

  "Eat up and we'll pack up and head back. That is unless you'd like to spend one extra day making love."

  "That’s a tempting offer. Christina can wait." Maureen blushed as she smiled at Rusty.

  Chapter Nine

  "Oh Christina, this has been the best week I've ever had." Maureen sipped on the large glass of lemonade as they sat out on the veranda. It was unseasonably warm for the beginning of spring. She had only been home since morning and it was the first chance her and Christina had to sit and talk together.

  "I'm glad that you made it through the rough times and had fun too." Christina said. She picked up a cracker with cream cheese to go along with the lemonade.

  “Now I can go to outpatient treatment twice a week. Rusty asked me to marry him and I said yes."

  "I'm so happy for you Maureen. You look better than I've ever seen you look."

  "I know and I feel better than I have in a long time. Now that I've found my way I know I can make it. Now don't expect a perfect sister, because I'm still Maureen but I'm trying hard to change

  "I know sis, but I have faith in you. I can see the change already. Why the old Maureen wouldn't think of marrying a man without money. And even then you were honest about finding a rich man. You never hid the fact that money meant the world to you."

  "I know Christina. I can't believe it myself but I guess it's because I finally found the one man who could tame me, who loved me the way I was and didn't try to change me. I feel about Rusty as I've never felt before. Not one of the men in my life could compare to him."

  "Well, when is the big day, or haven't you planned it yet?"

  "Well, we were kind of hoping that you'd have an announcement to make and we could...you know...make it a double wedding."

  "Well, I'm not sure of that Maureen. I love Andrew and the way he makes me feel, but I think it's not been long enough."

  "Don't be silly Christina. It's been over a year now since Tyler's death. You have a right to be happy. Didn't he ask you yet?"

  "Yes he's asked me over and over, but I keep putting him off. I j
ust think everyone will say it's terrible of me to marry again when Tyler isn't cold in the ground yet."

  "Don't be crazy Christina. The hell with what anyone else thinks. It's your life and he may not stick around forever you know."

  "Well, I don't know. I'll have to think about it." Christina laughed at the pleading look in Maureen's eyes. She thought a double wedding would be wonderful too, but still, people would talk.

  "By the way, how is Lauren's mother? I heard she was in the hospital." Maureen looked at Christina and smiled.

  "Lauren is holding up better than I thought she would. I told her to take off all the time she needed, but she insists on working. I feel so helpless when I try to help her. Ever since Tyler died Lauren keeps her distance from me. Then other times I see her face when she doesn't know I'm looking and she looks like a vulnerable little girl who doesn't know where to turn. I know she doesn't have any other family or friends."

  “That’s not your problem. You’ve done your best trying to help her.”

  "Well, I'm going to go upstairs and lay down for a while. I'm not feeling quite up to par." Christina got up to leave so Maureen picked up the empty glasses and took them to the kitchen. A nap sounded like a good idea Maureen thought. It had been a hard week and Maureen was feeling kind of tired herself. She went upstairs to her room and laid down on the bed.

  Maureen opened her eyes and saw she had slept for a long time, it was nearly dusk. She felt better though, refreshed almost. She got up and headed for the kitchen. She heard someone rummaging around and saw Lauren in there.

  "What are you doing?" Maureen asked. "I thought you'd be at the hospital with your mother."

  "I'm going over in a little while to see her. Just thought I'd finish up for the day and make Christina some of her favorite tea.

  "Here I'll take it to her," Maureen said. "You go on and visit with your mother."

  "No, that's all right. I'll take Christina's tea up to her, and let you get yourself something to eat. I fixed potato salad in the refrigerator." Lauren seemed nervous and edgy and wouldn't let go of the tray carrying the cup and pot of tea.

  "I said I'd take it up to Christina so let go of the damn thing." Maureen grabbed the tray and turned her back on Lauren. "Crazy girl," she muttered as she carried the tea upstairs.

  As Maureen opened the door to Christina's room she found her in a deep sleep. Better not wake her, she thought as she set the tray down on the nightstand.

  Maureen picked up the teapot and poured a cup for herself and sank back onto the overstuffed chair that overlooked the window. The sun was just beginning to set and the sky was full of gold and orange hues. She watched a squirrel jump from one tree to another as if playing tag with another little squirrel who followed along behind.

  She couldn't wait for summer to arrive. She sipped slowly on the tea, savoring it's exotic flavor. Must be one of those new herbal teas Lauren was always buying for Christina. She had to admit that is was good. It was strangely quiet tonight, she thought as she closed her eyes for a moment, suddenly feeling very sleepy.

  "Wake up Maureen, wake up," Christina shouted loudly as she stood over her sisters lifeless body lying on the floor and shook her fiercely. Maureen wasn't responding. Christina felt her pulse. It was weak. "No, no it can't be happening again. Not Maureen too," she cried grabbing the phone and dialing 911.

  "Please I need help," she screamed into the phone hysterically.

  "Calm down ma'am," the voice on the other end of the phone responded. "What's wrong?"

  "It's my sister. I found her lying on the floor, barely breathing and I can't wake her. Please you have to help me," Christina sobbed tearfully.

  "We have an ambulance on its way. Now stay calm."

  Christina knelt down beside Maureen and stroked her hair. "It's going to be alright Maureen. I'm right here with you," she crooned softly as the tears streamed down her face. She heard the sirens in the distance and ran downstairs to unlock the door, realizing she was still in her nightgown. She ran upstairs and threw on a robe. "Up here," Christina hollered from the top of the stairs as she heard the paramedics at the front door.

  The paramedics began moving about swiftly checking Maureen's vital signs. "Her breathing is shallow. Start her on some oxygen and an iv drip."

  "What's wrong with her?" Christina demanded.

  "We don't know yet ma'am."

  They finished strapping Maureen onto the stretcher and wheeled her towards the waiting ambulance. Christina walked beside the stretcher holding Maureen's hand tightly. "It's going to be alright sis, I promise."

  Christina started to climb inside with her when the paramedic stopped her.

  "I'm sorry but you can't ride in here," he announced softly. "You can ride up front if you'd like."

  Christina climbed in the front as she wiped her cheeks with the back of her hand. Thoughts of Tyler's death came to mind as the sirens wailed loudly. She glanced uneasily over her shoulder, becoming more worried with each passing minute. It was like she was reliving a nightmare again...only this time it was Maureen in the ambulance instead of Tyler.

  They finally pulled into the emergency entrance and quickly took Maureen in. The receptionist stopped Christina.

  "I need some information miss," she said. "Are you related to the patient?"

  "Yes she's my sister. Can't we do this later? I want to go in there with her, please?" Christina begged, her face clouded with uneasiness. She swallowed hard.

  "I'm sorry but we really need some information first, then you can go in with her," the nurse replied sympathetically.

  Christina sat impatiently giving her the information requested.

  "Okay. That's all I need. Thank you."

  Christina mumbled a curt, "your welcome" as she headed for Maureen's cubicle. The nurse had hung a second IV and was taking her vital signs again.

  "How is she?" Christina stammered. Uncertainty made her voice harsh and demanding.

  "I don't know yet. The doctor will be in shortly." With that the nurse was gone to another cubicle.

  Christina looked at her sister lying there so pale, so venerable. She had never seen her like this in her entire life and it scared her. She reached down and wiped a strand of hair from Maureen's face.

  "Sis, can you hear me?" she asked biting her lip to control the sobs welling up inside her. Maureen didn't answer.

  "Sis please wake up." She leaned down kissed her forehead softly as the doctor appeared.

  "Hi. I'm doctor Valenta. Now what seems to be going on with your sister?" he asked as he studied the chart in his hand.

  "I don't know. I woke up and found her lying on the floor," Christina responded, tears still trembled on her eyelids. "I shook her trying to wake her up but she just laid there."

  He began examining Maureen, starting with her eyes. "Any history of heart problems, diabetes?" he asked.

  "Not that I know of. We really don't know a lot about our mom or her medical history, she left while we were little."

  The doctor continued examining Maureen with a worried look on his face. Maureen started to moan incoherently and thrash to and fro on the bed. The doctor ordered blood work but still looked puzzled.

  "I'm not sure what's wrong just yet. After the blood work comes back maybe I'll know more."

  Maureen came to for a moment. "Where am I?" she asked weakly. "My hands feel like they're burning. What's wrong with me?" she asked tearfully. Suddenly she began to vomit profusely. Christina called for the nurse who rushed in to help her.

  "There, there," she whispered as she took a cool damp cloth and wiped her face gently. "Everything's going to be alright."

  "But I hurt so bad all over," continued Maureen miserably. Her mouth was as pale as her cheeks. "Can you give me something for my head?" she pleaded with the nurse. "It's really killing me."

  "Let me check with the doctor and see what we can give you," she answered, turning to leave.

  Christina stepped closer to Maureen and held her hand. "What
happened?" she asked, her face clouded with uneasiness.

  "I don't really know. I brought you up some tea and since you were sleeping I decided not to wake you. I drank the tea and was sitting in the chair looking out the window. Then I felt dizzy and sick to my stomach and was getting up to go to the bathroom and everything got black. Did I pass out?" she asked.

  "You must have. I woke up and found you lying on the floor and called 911 when I couldn't wake you," Christina replied biting her lip.

  "I think I'm going to be sick again," shouted Maureen as her body began heaving once again. Her skin was cold and clammy. She collapsed back onto the bed and wept.

  "Make it stop hurting sis," she begged grabbing hold of Christina's arm tightly.

  Christina's eyes filled with tears as she stood there feeling helpless. She wished she could take the pain away.

  The doctor returned momentarily to check on her. "How are you feeling?" he asked matter-of-factly.

  "I can't stand it doctor. Make it stop hurting," she pleaded desperately.

  "The nurse said you vomited and that your hands were burning. What did you eat today?" he asked. "Do you do drugs of any kind?"

  "Not any more doctor. I used to but I stopped taking any kind of drugs."

  "What does what I ate have to do with anything?" she screamed.

  "Just bear with me for a minute. Some of your symptoms seem to resemble food poisoning but I won't know till the blood work comes back. What did you eat and drink today."

  "I had coffee and a Danish for breakfast, a salad and ice tea for lunch and a turkey sandwich, chips and coffee for supper. But Christina ate everything I ate today and she's not sick so it can't be the food, can it?" she muttered as she massaged her aching temples.

  "Well if you both ate the exact same thing than I hardly think it would be food poison." The doctor seemed stumped as he studied the chart.

  "I've ordered something for the pain. The nurse will be in with it in just a minute. I'll check back with you in a little while when all the tests are in."