“So I know we been ignoring the elephant in the room,” Marcio said quietly. I looked at him sighing.
“Yeah we have.” He nodded pursing his lips.
“So is it true?” he asked tight-lipped. I looked at him not sure what the fuck he was talking about.
“Is what true Marcio?” He let go of my hand and with the flick of his wrist he slapped me hard as hell across the face. He grabbed my hair and I went wild on him. I punched him anywhere I could. He drove with one hand managing not to crash the car until finally he pulled over. He threw it in park and grabbed me by my neck. I grabbed into his shoulders trying to make him loosen his grip as my eyes filled with tears.
“Harlow…mi amor (my love) I didn’t wanna do this. I stayed away to calm myself down. I buried myself in my work but you just didn’t stop. You continue to text him and play me behind my back and then I see pictures on the internet this morning from his party and you was letting him hug all up on you and shit. How the fuck do you think that makes me feel? Huh!” he yelled squeezing harder around my neck. My eyes closed from the pain. “I love you Harlow. I fucking love you and you do me like this? I’m not Marcos, I don’t cheat, I don’t have babies on you and I respect you. I was everything that you needed plus more and you play me? Since you wanna act like me and him are one in the same then I’m not going to hold back for you anymore. Whatever I feel like doing I’ma do.” He let my neck go and slowly sat back in his seat. He adjusted his platinum cuff links that was he and my diamond initials, while I rubbed my sore neck.
“I guess you should know that I moved Jhene in with us. I’m going to get her pregnant and I’m going to marry her as well. She will have the west wing of the house and you and the kids will have the east wing of the house. I tried to be everything that you wanted me to be baby, and you didn’t appreciate it so now she has taken that spot in my heart when you used to own the whole damn thing. She’s been riding for me since I got locked up Lee. I love her. I’m not in love with her but I love her and I wanna be with her too. At least she cares about me and my feelings. My father has multiple wives and they are all very happy so don’t worry about if you will get the short end of the stick because you won’t. You’re the first wife so I will spend most of my time with you.” Marcio chuckled as I looked out of the car window. I noticed that we were close to my dad’s house.
“Make no mistake about it Lee, I am still in love with you. Your heart belongs to me and I will never let it go especially to be with him. The quicker you accept this the better your life will be. I only have your best interest at heart. I got your father to meet with us. He wants to talk to you and that was all me. I know how much you miss him so I made it happen because I love you that much. I wanted to show you that I am still the man of your dreams Harlow,” Marcio said and beamed proudly like he deserved an award. I gave him a weak smile then I looked away. I knew what I had to do to get away from him and now wasn’t the time to, so I had to play my part because there was no way in hell I was about to allow him to be married to me and that bitch.
“Thank you baby,” I said quietly. Marcio grabbed my face and forced me to look at him. His slanted hazel eyes peered at me for a while just taking me in, trying to see if I was sincere or not.
“Do you still love me?” he asked. I nodded immediately as I started to cry. My Marcio had not only choked me but threatened my life. He was turning into someone that I didn’t even know.
“You know I do Marcio. I’m sorry that I even made you doubt it. Now Jhene is another story but I love you,” I said then caressed his cheek. Relief washed over his handsome face.
“I’m sorry too baby. I didn’t mean to choke and slap you. I lost my cool and it won’t happen again. Jhene will stick to her side of the house and she won’t be a problem. I promise. Now let’s go talk with your father.” He was out of his fucking mind. I smiled at him and kissed him gently on the lips. He smiled at me again and sat back in his seat. “Marcos is okay with you keeping Jolie. Honestly Lee, you and I both know he is too busy running the streets to raise her anyway,” Marcio said pulling off. He was back happy like we hadn’t just fought in the car not even five minutes ago.
“I know and well, I love her like she is my own anyway so it is what it is,” I said feeling an urge that I hadn’t felt in a while. I needed to get high. Marcio massaged my thigh.
“You are my superwoman. That new house that you wanted is being built as we speak. There is nothing that I wouldn’t do for you and there is nothing that I won’t do for us to stay together,” he said nonchalantly, but the silent threat crept into my body and up my spine. I knew what he was saying even though he hadn’t come directly out and said it. It was so natural for him to threaten my life yet he loved me. If that was what love really was then I wanted no parts of it.
The ride to my dad’s home took less than twenty minutes. Marcio parked near my dad’s garage and we both got out. Marcio grabbed my hand and led me to the front door.
“Are you nervous? I know it’s been awhile,” he said as he rang the doorbell. I shook my head. I was too wrapped up on where I was going to get some pills from to be nervous. I was being hit with way too much shit and I just needed a release. I was willing to pay whatever for it.
“Marcio…Harlow Lee,” my dad said answering the door. He looked the same, even wore a suit that looked somewhat like the suit he had on the day he told me never to call him again. I stepped towards him and hugged him tightly. His rigid body told me that he was far from happy to see me. I hugged him anyway, needing his comfort. If only he knew what I had just gone through. I stepped back and looked at me. His eyes narrowed into slits.
“What happened to your neck and face?” he asked. Marcio pulled me to his side.
“Some fool tried to snatch her purse on her way out of her counseling session,” he lied and actually sounded convincing. My dad took a step back then moved to the side so that we could walk in.
“Did they catch him? She looks awful.” We stepped in and I walked off as Marcio answered his question with yet another lie. It didn’t take long for me to realize that the sole reason why my dad agreed to meet with me was because Marcio donated an undisclosed amount of money to his campaign. It hurt a lot because I thought that my dad was better than that but he wasn’t.
“How are the kids doing? Catherine has them every other weekend but with me working so much I don’t get a chance to see them,” he said lying straight to our faces. Marcio kissed me on the cheek and looked at my dad.
“They’re good, they really are. I’m hoping to add a new addition to the family very soon,” he said chuckling. My dad looked at him and laughed. If only he knew that the woman carrying that child wouldn’t be me. I pulled away from Marcio and stood up. They both looked at me with questioning eyes.
“I’ll be back. I gotta go to the bathroom,” I said and quickly walked away. I tiptoed up the wood stairs and into my dad and Catherine’s bedroom. I moved fast, as I found her pill selection in her bathroom and took a few pills out of her Vicodin bottle. I saw her Xanax bottle and did a little dance before taking some of those as well. I wrapped them in tissue and stuffed them into the side of my bra. I pulled my phone out of my clutch and took a deep breath. What I was about to do was the last thing I wanted to but it what was right because I didn’t want to pull Jaycion any further into my drama. I had to set him free because I loved him just that much. I wouldn’t string him along on some selfish shit. My life was a mess; he didn’t need to be with a woman like me anyway.
Me: Jaycion…this is the last thing I ever wanted to do but it needs to be done. My life is a mess right now. I really don’t know which way is up and for me to figure it out I’ma need to stay with Marcio. I do love you and that is why I’m doing this. You deserve to be loved by a woman that can give you her all and right now I just can’t do that. I’m sorry, please don’t hate me but this is my decision.
Jaycion: Yep…
A pain shot through my heart as I erased the text messa
ge and put my phone away. I looked at myself in the oversized vanity mirror and sighed. I looked so beautiful… if only my feelings could reflect how I looked, I would be all good. I smoothed down my bone straight hair that curled slightly at the ends and licked my red, liquid lipstick-stained lips. My light skin was glowing but my neck was still bruised from Marcio choking me earlier. I shook my head and rushed out of the bedroom and to the bathroom down the hall. I went in it and locked the door. I sat on the closed toilet lid and pulled the pills out of my bra. I sat with them in my hands lost in my thoughts. Marcos had given up on his life with me. Marcio was trying to force me to live with him and another woman and then there was my kids. I frowned as I thought about the fucked up environment I had brought them into. Yes, we had more money and things that I could ever hope for, but we were all types of fucked up. My sons called two men daddy and now Marcio thought that they would share siblings with a bitch that did everything in her power to bring me down. There is no way in hell I’m dealing with that. They promised me that I would be the only woman to carry their name and bear their children. Marcos broke the promise so I guess Marcio felt it was only right for him to do the same.
“Momma tell me what to do. My life is in shambles,” I said looking down at the pills. Just the thought of taking them lifted my spirits, but then I couldn’t stop thinking about my babies and how much they needed me. If I was to get back hooked on pills the twins would for sure take my kids away from me and I couldn’t let that happen. I lived for my children. I couldn’t be able to survive without them.
“Harlow…you gotta fix your life,” I told myself as I stood up. I lifted the toilet lid and dropped the pills down into it. I flushed the toilet and closed my eyes. Damn. I should have at least taken one but with me one would have only been the beginning.
****
“Hey mami, how was your day?” Marcio asked greeting me at the door. I pushed back the opening of “Styled by Harlow” because I felt I wasn’t ready. I was so close to taking the pills and that fact alone scared me. The very next day I checked into rehab and decided to stay for a few weeks. I’ve been back home for a few days now and things are actually going good. Only problem is that Jhene has now moved into my home. A place that I used to love, because it was so beautiful it deserved to be on television or on the cover of someone’s magazine. Now it was a place where another woman fucked my husband. I felt like I was living in hell on Earth.
I stepped past Marcio and walked into my home. I had been working hard with one of my old clients for a performance that she had, and I was so happy to be in my element. She loved every outfit that I pulled and asked me to dress her for the Sag Awards. Of course I couldn’t turn that down.
“I said how was your day mami?” Marcio asked walking up behind me. I looked up at my spiral staircase and watched Jhene as she walked down the steps in a floor length silk robe holding a glass of champagne. My children were with my step-mom for the night and I began to wish I would have never come home.
“Harlow, hi,” she waved and smiled. She blew Marcio a kiss and walked off headed for the kitchen.
“Lee…please try to be nice to her,” he said wrapping his arms around my waist. The pain and anger I had in me made me feel like I could go crazy at any minute.
“Marcio, I didn’t sign on to be with her. She isn’t my fucking wife so I don’t have to do shit!” I snapped. Marcio spun me around and grabbed my face. There was no love in his eyes as he looked down at me.
“You will love her because I do. If you love me then you will do whatever to make me happy. I do whatever I can to please you so show me the same respect or we gonna have some fucking problems in here,” he said through gritted teeth. I snatched my face out of his grip.
“Fuck you Marcio…fuck you and that bitch that you done moved up in here!” I yelled and stormed off. I rushed up the stairs and he grabbed my leg pulling me back down them. My back and head hurt immediately as he pulled me like a rag doll down the wooden stairs. I kicked at him as hard as I could.
“Marcio! Please calm down papi,” Jhene pleaded as Marcio climbed on top of me. He tried to hit me and I blocked him. He looked me in the eyes and shook his head.
“Mami…why do you keep doing this? Are you that determined to let me go? Don’t I give you everything that you need? How bad is it really to share me when I have been sharing you since the moment you stepped into my life? I loved you enough to deal with you fucking my brother so why can’t you do me the same way?” he asked in a low, gravelly voice. I shook my head.
“Because I can’t. I didn’t sign on for this Marcio. You are supposed to love me,” I whimpered. Marcio bent his head so that our noses touched.
“And you are supposed to obey me. I guess neither of us can get what we want,” he whispered and kissed me. I moved my head and he gripped it with both hands making me kiss him back. I bit down hard on his bottom lip and he pulled back.
“Jhene, go get my shit off of my bed!” he yelled holding my hands above my head.
“Marcio…emotions are high and we should just call it a night. Let’s talk about this tomorrow,” I suggested. Marcio looked at me with his hazel eyes. He seemed so angry and had this wild look in his eyes. I looked at his flushed skin and frowned.
“Are you high on something Marcio? What the fuck is going on?” Jhene rushed back down the stairs and handed Marcio his gun. He pressed it to my forehead and Jhene screamed. What did the bitch expect him to do with the shit?
“I’m good mami. I did a few lines because you been stressing me the fuck out but I’m good now. What I’m tired of is you mistreating me. So what you’re going to do is go up to our bedroom and fuck me and Jhene. I’m a king Hermosa (beautiful) and your days of not treating me like one is over. If you don’t take your ass up the stairs I’ma kill you tonight. Do you …believe me Harlow? Do you think I won’t?” he asked pressing the gun deeper into the side of my head. The way his eye twitched let me know that he was indeed high out of his mind and that I might die in here on this floor. I nodded quickly.
“Yes papi I do. I’m so sorry baby,” I said crying. Jhene sobbed loudly behind us making Marcio frown.
“Shut the fuck up Jhene! This is what you wanted. Go upstairs and get in the bed now,” he ordered and looked down at me. “Harlow, some shit is changing and it’s starting with you. From now on we’re all gonna share a bed together. Okay?” he asked. I nodded looking up into his eyes.
“I’m fine with that Marcio. I just wanna live,” I replied. Marcio smiled. He moved the gun away from my head and kissed me gently on the lips.
“Then make me happy and you will,” he whispered against my lips. He climbed off of me and helped me stand up. He led me up the stairs and showed me that he was indeed the bad twin as he raped me repeatedly and forced me to have sex with his girlfriend.
Chapter Thirteen
Inga
“So when I tell her to make the nigga leave she does, then I find out a week later that she got his ass back at my fucking house! I’ma fuck both of them up and I’ma handle this nigga very soon,” Hayden ranted to Romelo as they talked in my living room. I stood in the doorway and listened while Hayden had his back to me. He paced back and forth angrily. Romelo kept trying to give him the eye signal but he wasn’t catching on. No, he was too pissed about whom Tegan was fucking. He pulled up his loose Jordan sweats that hung off of his narrow waist and shook his head. I stared at his back that was covered in tattoos, wondering if I should hit him upside his head with the lamp that I was standing near.
“I mean how hard it is for her to take simple directions? Stay the fuck away from that bitch ass nigga then she got my fucking son around him and shit. I swear if he call that nigga daddy I’ma hurt that bitch! I’m so happy I left her ass. To think I was feeling bad about all the ...”
“Hey nigga I’ma about to bounce,” Romelo said standing up and saving Hayden’s ass. Hayden stopped pacing the floor and nodded. He turned with Romelo to leave the living room and
he spotted me. He stopped frowning and licked his lips. I wasn’t going to let his sexy ass out of this one though. I refused to look at his broad chest that was covered in tattoos and ripped to perfection. Nope, sex was the last thing on my mind.
“What up Iggy?” he asked smiling. I mean did he really think everything was all good? I rolled my eyes letting him know his ass was busted. I was so fucking tired of him and Tegan. I needed to be concerned with Harper and his crazy ass. He had been harassing me non-stop for the past week while Hayden was away in Houston handling business. For him to not be into illegal shit, he was definitely still traveling like he was. I guess he forgot that I managed the accounts as well because the money he was depositing wasn’t coming from them damn sports bars.
“Come see me when you let him out,” I said and walked away. I could hear Romelo chuckle as I walked down the hall.
“You know he was with Tegan for years baby girl so he probably still loves her. Not saying he doesn’t love you I’m just saying that he has to have some kind of feelings for her. If you have the man what’s the problem? It’s obvious you won,” Hayden’s mother said as I stepped into the kitchen. I looked at her and walked right back out. The way I was feeling I could curse her ass out too. I was putting her on a plane today heading for California. She had already made my shit list by inviting Tegan to a party that I planned for her. Tegan came, we ended up arguing and Hayden canceled the party making everyone leave. After that I had no words for his mother. She was obviously team Tegan.
I grabbed my baby from her crib and sat in the rocker. She was growing daily and so chunky. I was in love with her beauty. I loved her so much and didn’t know how I would even have time to care of this baby in my stomach, but I was keeping it so I would have to make the time.
The Way That I Love You 3 Page 12