The Strawberry Heart

by Finella Vane

  Anselle didn’t recognize the girl who entered the room behind Lisa. She was tall and balding with a graying moustache and goatee. The stranger held out her hand and introduced herself, “Gregory, nice to meet you.”

  Anselle heard the Scottish accent but clearly understood it (not like the kid she had to live with her first year at university), “Uh…yeah, Anselle, nice to meet you too.”

  “Oh, sorry,” Lisa pulled out of Niav’s embrace, “Everyone this is Gregory. Gregory this is everyone. Anselle you’ve just met and this,” she says gesturing, “is her fiancé, Niav. Gina you met in the hallway.”

  Gregory shook Niav’s hand, “Congratulations on your engagement. It’s nice to meet you.”

  “Thank you. It’s nice to meet you too,” Niav turned wide eyes to Anselle who only shrugged.

  Gina passed out glasses of wine while Lisa began her story. Her rental car had broken down outside some obscure Scottish village and Gregory, who was on holiday of her own, stopped to help. It seemed that the Scot was also suffering from a broken heart and the two hit it off immediately and had been together ever since. Lisa was smiling like Niav had never seen before so she knew she didn’t have to worry about the woman trying to come between her and Anselle anymore (not that she was…). They learned that Gregory owned her own business, a small souvenir shop on Buchanan Street in Glasgow (which her sister was watching for her) and that she also did occasional movie voice-over work. The Scot was also thinking about trying her hand at local theater productions but hadn’t auditioned for anything yet.

  Conversation flowed easily until it was time for Gina and Niav to return to the kitchen to prepare the rest of the meal. The two women diced sweet potatoes, carrots, butternut squash and parsnips. The vegetables were drizzled with and mixed into olive oil, salt and pepper before the trays were slid into the oven. The next item to be prepared was the sausage, apple and raisin stuffing. Niav boiled orange juice and raisins in a pan while Gina melted butter to cook the celery and onions in another pan. The celery and onions were cooked until soft then spooned into a large bowl. Niav took the sausage meat out of the casings and gave it to Gina to fry in the pot the celery and onions had been cooked in. Once the sausage was cooked; it along with breadcrumbs, diced apples, pecans and the orange juice were added to the celery and onions. Chicken stock was added to the mix along with thyme, herbs de Provence and salt and pepper. The stuffing was mixed well and put into greased baking tins, covered and slid into the oven with the vegetables.

  The duo cleaned up the kitchen and put the dirty pots into the dishwasher before returning to the parlor. Gina spotted the ball of mistletoe Anselle must’ve found in the ornament box now hanging in the entryway and looked down at Niav, “No offense because I really like you but there’s no way I’m kissing you.”

  Niav laughed when she realized what Gina was talking about but she put a hand on the taller Englishman’s shoulder, leaned over and gave her a peck on the cheek anyway.

  Dinner was still an hour away and Elise and Niav’s mom would be arriving shortly. Gina turned on the radio and found a station playing holiday music, lit the candles on the sideboard and over the mantle and lit the fire in the hearth. The house was filled with the delicious aromas coming from the kitchen and the warmth from the fire in the parlor. It was more than Niav could’ve imagined. She snuggled closer into Anselle and wished they were alone….upstairs….in bed, “I never thought that when I first saw you leaning over the balcony railing nine months ago that I would wind up here with an entirely different life. Thank you. I love you.”

  Anselle pressed a kiss to the top of Niav’s head, “Love you too, Baby.”

  The five women shared stories from Christmases past and sang along with some songs on the radio while they had more wine and sat in the comfortable warmth of the fire. The doorbell rang and Gina rose to answer it. She soon returned to the parlor with two ladies. Niav immediately stood to embrace her mother while Gina introduced Elise to Lisa and Gregory. There were tears in the woman’s eyes when she finally let her mother go. Anselle was immediately by Niav’s side with a hand on the small of her back in support.

  “Mum, this is my fiancé, Anselle,” Niav took a step back from her mother and sniffled. She looked exactly like she remembered, not one gray hair ran through her dark curls which were swept away from her face and held in place with tortoiseshell combs, light-brown eyes with dark lashes and not one wrinkle marred her ivory complexion. Her hands were still soft; the nails at the ends of her long fingers carefully manicured. It was so easy for her to think no time at all had passed since she had last seen her.

  “It’s so nice to finally meet you Mrs. Wallace.”

  Her Irish accent was thick, “Oh, please, call me Vianne.” She took Anselle’s hand and pulled her into a hug, “Are you feeding my boy? She looks too thin.”

  Anselle blushed as she heard Niav groan behind her, “Well…she mostly feeds me.”

  “You’re much too thin too.”

  Niav took her by the elbow to cut her off before she could embarrass her any further, “Mum, this is Lisa and her friend Gregory.”

  Both Lisa and Gregory stepped away from Elise to shake Vianne’s hand.

  “You’ve met Elise and Gina, yeah?”

  “Yes, I bumped into Elise on the steps and of course, Gina opened the door.” Niav’s mother opened the shopping bag she brought in and presented a bottle of wine to Gina, “Thank you so much for hosting dinner. I hope this is good. I had to ask the clerk at the shop.” Vianne took another bottle out and handed it to Anselle.

  Gina took the bottle and was pleasantly surprised, “Yes, this is lovely. She recommended an excellent wine. Thank you.”

  Anselle bent over to pick-up the wrapped calligraphy box from under the Christmas tree and handed it to Niav’s mother, “Niav and I got this for you. We hope you like it.”

  “Oh, Dear,” Vianne replied, “you shouldn’t have. I told her not to bother.” She sat in a chair balancing the box on her knees to unwrap it. She unhooked the latch and lifted the lid, “Oh, my. It’s lovely. I’ll get a lot of use out of this. Thank you.” She fingered through the box expressing her delight at every piece. After she placed the box in her shopping bag she gave Anselle and Niav hugs and kisses on the cheek.

  ***

  As Vianne talked to Lisa about Wales, Elise whispered to Niav, “She doesn’t know I’m your doctor, does she?”

  “No,” Niav whispered back, “I told her only that you were Gina’ friend.” It’s at that time that Niav realized something about Elise and grinned down at her, “Elise…are you….? And is that….?”

  “Yes,” the doctor rubs a hand over her growing middle and wiggled the fingers on her left hand to show the sparkling diamond, “twins and we’re engaged as of yesterday.”

  “Congratulations! I can’t believe I didn’t notice but you’re always sitting down,” the woman tugged her into a careful hug then turned her attention to her girlfriend, “Gina! Congratulations!”

  At Niav’s shout everyone turned their attention to the woman who had Elise and Gina in her arms. When the three separated it was obvious what part of the shouting was about. Elise explained that she was about twenty weeks along and that Gina asked her to marry her before they left for her sister’s house for Christmas Evelyn-day breakfast. Good wishes and congratulations were given to the happy couple and the artist asked if she had a boy if she would name her Niav because she was the reason she and Gina had met. She said no…but with quite a bit of fondness in her voice.

  Niav kidnapped Anselle by pulling Anselle into the kitchen. The woman knew her behavior seemed a bit rude since the mother she hadn’t seen in years had just arrived but she felt the need to be busy and not just sit in awkward silence. Niav had Anselle help her remove the vegetables and stuffing from the upper oven before removing the turkey from the lower oven. Anselle spooned the vegetables and stuffing onto serving trays while Niav placed the turkey on a large cutting board then set the pan o
n the stove to make gravy with the drippings. The woman removed some of the fat from the pan before dissolving corn starch in water and pouring it into the pan. She whisked the ingredients together until the gravy began to thicken. As it cooked and got thicker she had Anselle pour in some stock and cream until it was the consistency she wanted. While Niav stirred Anselle sliced a loaf of French bread and put the slices into a bread basket.

  Gina came in to help Anselle bring out the serving trays then returned to the kitchen to carve the turkey. Niav finished the gravy with some salt and pepper then ladled it into a gravy boat. The artist took the gravy boat and grabbed the bread basket on her way to the dining room. Niav went back to the kitchen for butter and to see if Gina needed any help. Gina shooed the artist away, telling her that everything was almost done and she would be out in a few minutes.

  Gina carried the turkey out to applause. Everyone had already helped themselves to the sides (Elise spooned some of them out for Gina) and now Gina brought the turkey around the table for everyone to take some. Once everyone had been served they passed around the gravy and the bread and butter and raised their wine glasses to toast to the day and each other’s health and began to eat.

  The talk around the table was friendly and easy. Niav’s mother found Gregory’s business very interesting and asked all kinds of questions about how she got it started giving Niav the impression that she wanted to start a business of her own. Niav shared newly learned facts about the history of Bristol with Gina while Anselle and Lisa regaled Elise with stories from their university days. They made an especially hard effort to remember and tell her embarrassing stories about Gina. Conversations shifted around the table again and again like they’d all known each other for years. Niav was surprised how well her mother conversed and held her own in conversations with the different types of professionals around the table.

  When everyone was finished eating, some their second or third helpings, Niav and Gina cleared the table to prepare it for dessert. Niav brought out cups and saucers then went back for the sugar bowl and milk. Niav took her seat while Gina poured the coffee; Gina had started buying the same imported brand Niav got and everyone loved it. When everyone was done Anselle and Niav cleared the plates from the table and put them into the dishwasher and set it to run.

  Seconds of coffee were offered and served to those who accepted and they took the cups into the parlor to relax. During a break in the holiday music they heard fireworks going off over the river. Everyone, except Niav, ran for a coat then out the door to the back deck to watch the display. Niav smiled and nodded her approval to Anselle as she watched from behind the closed sliders. The fireworks boomed and sizzled, “Have a Holy Jolly Christmas” played on the radio, the people on the deck cheered and shifted positions to get a better view, someone bumped Elise and she shouted. Niav closed her eyes and took a deep breath.

  Niav was four; Christmas music was playing in the background and she was standing on a deck full of people watching fireworks with her mum. Boom! Red. Boom! Blue. Boom! Green. Boom! Silver. Her mum lifted her up to sit on the rail so she could see better. There was someone else sitting next to her on the rails. The girl had the same curly hair and big brown eyes as she did and appeared to be about the same age. She turned her head looking for her dad only to see her smiling from behind closed glass doors. She looked back up into the sky but her mom cried out and pitched forward almost knocking her from the rail. Her little hands grabbed for her coat, there was another jolt and then they were falling. When she woke up it was days later and she was in hospital with her arm in a cast, a plaster on her head and a bandage around her chest. Her dad was asleep in the chair next to the bed but woke instantly when Niav called out for her. Dad said she had a broken arm, a big bump on her head and other bumps and bruises on her chest but all Niav knew is that she hurt everywhere and she wanted her mum but dad said that mum couldn’t be there right then because she had got some bumps and bruises too and needed to rest.

  When next Niav opened her eyes she was on the floor in Gina’ study with is head resting in Anselle’s lap. Elise sat on the floor next to her wiping her face with a cool, wet cloth. The woman tried to sit up but Anselle’s strong hand on her chest kept her in place. Niav could hear voices coming from the other room and she was glad everyone wasn’t standing around gawking at her.

  “Niav,” Elise’s gentle voice called to her, “tell me what happened.”

  Niav did her best to tell her what she saw; what happened to her when she was little and about the little girl who looked like her. The doctor nodded her understanding, handed the cloth to Anselle and told them to come to the parlor when they were ready. The artist’s hand shook as she reached out to Anselle for more physical comfort.

  Anselle grasped her love’s hand in her, “I’m here now. You’re alright.” Anselle wiped Niav’s brow with the towel, “How are you feeling?”

  Niav sighed, “Tired. Confused. I don’t remember any of that happening.”

  “I know, Love. We’ll figure it out together with Elise. Can you sit up?”

  “I think so.”

  Anselle helped Niav sit up, the artist’s back to her chest like all those months ago when they had first met, “Do you want to go upstairs to lay down or into the parlor?”

  “Elise wants us to go into the parlor.”

  “Right now I’m not concerned with what Elise wants. What do you want?”

  “I want to go home,” that’s when the tears started to fall.

  Half an hour later Niav, with Anselle’s assistance, made it into the parlor. Vianne stood and moved forward to assist from Niav’s other side. Lisa and Gregory had said their good-byes to Vianne and Gina, not wanting to make Niav any more uncomfortable. They had thanked Gina for dinner and the three made plans to get together one night the following week. Niav’s mother bent to kiss her son on the cheek.

  Elise sat in the chair opposite the sofa, “Niav, tell your mother what you saw; what you remembered.” Gina hovered close by, not wanting her to stress herself.

  Niav repeated what she had seen to her mother about her memory of being on the deck and falling and waking up in hospital with her dad.

  Vianne went pale as she backed up to sit in the chair next to Niav’s side of the sofa. “The doctor told us, that you had the resilience of youth and that we shouldn’t worry about you’re not remembering what happened. I remember her saying those exact words to us ‘resilience of youth’. We were just happy that you weren’t hurt worse.”

  “Vianne, Niav needs to know what happened that night.”

  Niav’s mother looked at her son lying in Anselle’s arms, barely awake on the sofa. The guilt she had accused Niav of trying to make her feel surfaced. She had let Niav down after she had come out; when she needed her the most and now she needed her even more. “That memory was from when we had come to London for Christmas. A girlfriend of mine had got a job here and invited us. We thought it would be a grand time.” She got lost for a moment in the feelings her memory was creating. When she took up her story there were tears in her eyes, “We were on a deck just like tonight after dinner watching the fireworks. I had you sitting up on the rail next to me with my arm around you and....and...your sister. You were so happy pointing at the fireworks and telling me the colors. I don’t know what happened exactly; it felt like the deck dropped but the front rail came loose and fell away and a number of us who were leaning on it fell over the side after it.” She paused to blow her nose and dab at her tears.

  Niav said weekly, “Sister? I have a sister? All I got was a broken arm and bruised ribs. Where's my sister? Why don't I remember her? And what happened to you?”

  Vianne took another tissue from the box to blow her nose again, “She was your twin. She was so lovely, happy and smiling all the time, just like you. Two peas in a pod you were. The doctor said....when the deck collapsed....she...her neck was broken. She died Niav. I'm so sorry." She gave Niav a moment to digest what she just heard. When she didn't r
espond she went on with her story, "I was pregnant with another boy, about five months along. I had just started to show.” She cried into another tissue.

  Niav didn’t have to ask what happened to the baby, “After that you kept me close.”

  “Yes. I didn’t want anything to happen to you. I had to keep you safe.”

  “You never tried to have another baby?”

  “I couldn’t have any more after the accident.”

  "Why didn't you ever tell me about my sister?"

  "You were so young, Niav. You were in a coma for days and we were afraid we were going to lose you too. Your father decided it was best if we didn't talk about it. We couldn’t believe you forgot about it but you were so young."

  The news was devastating for Niav; she held on as tight as she could to Anselle. How could she have forgotten she had a sister and her mother was going to have a baby? How could she have forgotten she was in the hospital with a broken arm; the fall; the fireworks; the trip to London; the trip back home? None of it made any sense to her. Her head was swimming with the information but she didn’t want to hear anymore. Niav turned her head to Elise, “Can I go lie down now?”

  “Yes, Niav. We’ll talk more in the morning if you’re up to it.”

  “Niav,” her mother put a hand on her, “I’m so sorry. I should’ve told you but you can see how this is painful for me. And you didn’t remember anything so we didn’t talk about it.”

  “I don’t remember any of it but I’m glad I finally know,” and she did, she understood why it was painful and why she wouldn’t want to talk about it. She had been so young she wouldn’t have understood then and there was no reason to talk about it as she got older. Life moved on; she grew up relatively happy, safe and loved. Anselle helped the artist stand so she could hug her mother properly before going up to bed, “I love you mum.”