Outback Ghost

by Rachael Johns

  Frankie grinned victoriously. ‘I’ll be back in an hour to pick you up. We’ll head into Gero, catch a late arvo movie, have dinner and then hit the pub.’

  ‘I hope I can stay awake long enough for all that,’ Stella said.

  Adam laughed. ‘Trust me, Frankie won’t let you fall asleep.’

  Frankie left to go ‘pretty herself up’ and Adam said he’d make Heidi’s lunch so Stella could do the same. ‘Not that you need any prettying up,’ he whispered as they heard the front door shut behind Frankie.

  His compliment sent the usual heat to her cheeks and certain other places and she couldn’t help wishing her evening out on the town was going to be with him instead. Knowing Frankie and Simone, by the time they got her home, it would be next year and Adam would have been asleep for hours. ‘Will you be okay getting Heidi to bed?’ she asked, suddenly unsure again whether she should leave them alone for so long.

  He nodded and ushered her towards the hallway. ‘I’ve been helping you with her evening routine for the last few days. We’ll be fine. Don’t you trust me?’

  ‘It’s not that.’ Scarily, she found she did trust Adam. The thought of leaving Heidi with him wasn’t half as terrifying as she’d imagined it would be. ‘It’s just…’

  ‘I know,’ he said, his tone full of understanding, ‘and I promise you I’ll look after her. Now go and get ready. Frankie will skin me alive if she returns and you’re still wearing those fetching orange Crocs.’

  Stella laughed and went to prepare herself for her first real night out since she had been a teenager.

  After waving Stella and the girls off, Adam turned to Heidi standing beside him on the cottage’s veranda.

  ‘What would you like to do first?’ he asked, hoping she didn’t choose anything involving baking. Quite aside from the fact the oven would only make the temperature inside his house even more unbearable, he wasn’t far behind his mum in the cookie-making stakes.

  ‘Find Whiskers,’ she said, frowning into the distance.

  Mutton, who’d been dancing around their feet, stopped and looked up eagerly as if he understood what they were staying. Adam ignored the over-exuberant pup.

  ‘Has she not been around again this morning?’ he asked.

  Heidi shook her head, her normally sparkling eyes looking doleful.

  ‘Maybe she’s having her kittens,’ he said, realising too late that planting this possibility in her head was possibly not the brightest idea.

  Her eyes returned to their normal brightness. ‘Go look for her.’

  Adam inwardly groaned. He hated to disappoint her but aimlessly wandering around the farm in the mid-afternoon heat would be foolish. If Heidi got heatstroke or sunburn, Stella would tear strips off him. ‘How about we go see Esther?’ he suggested instead. ‘If we’re lucky Whiskers will be over there, but I promise you if she’s not, we’ll go looking for her when it gets cooler. Deal?’

  Grinning again, Heidi nodded as she thrust her little hand out to him. ‘Deal.’

  His hand seemed massive as it enveloped hers. ‘Come on, let’s go inside and find your shoes. Anything you else you want to take with you?’

  ‘Tea set,’ she announced as she turned to go in ahead of him.

  As they went through the house searching for Heidi’s sandals and gathering the pieces of tea set, which were scattered throughout the various rooms, Adam felt a surge of pride at the fact he’d offered to look after Heidi for an extended period of time. When Frankie had put the idea to him, he’d said ‘yes’ immediately because he wanted Stella to have fun and he didn’t want to admit to the fear he’d always harboured about the responsibility of children. Yet, the heart palpitations he’d expected to come with his decision had never arrived. Instead he found himself excited and almost confident about spending time alone with Heidi. She was such a great kid and he found himself looking at the world in a different, more respectful way whenever she was near.

  Lifting her onto the table as he bent to buckle on her sandals felt almost as normal as pulling on his own boots. He strapped Heidi in the back of the car and put Mutton on the front passenger seat, praying the pup wouldn’t have an accident in Stella’s car. Then, as he drove over to his parents’ place while Heidi chattered happily in back, he realised he couldn’t imagine not having she and her mum around.

  He didn’t want Stella and Heidi to go home. The thought of returning to an empty house at night made him feel numb. All the things he’d worked hard for – the continued success of the farm, even his mum’s recovery – seemed futile if he couldn’t have Stella in his life. Their fling had been beyond anything he could ever have imagined, but it wasn’t enough. This realisation almost sidelined him and he had to work hard to keep control of the car as he went too fast over a pothole in the gravel. Mutton barked.

  ‘Wheee!’ exclaimed Heidi, clapping her hands at what she thought Adam had done for excitement’s sake.

  He glanced in the rear-view mirror and smiled at the look of delight on her face. He almost stopped the car just so he could go around and hug her. She inspired that kind of craziness, as did her gorgeous mum. In spite off all the crap his family had been dealing with, he’d never once felt as if he couldn’t cope. With Stella by his side as he dealt with cops, the onset of family and media enquiries, he felt like he could handle anything. Was that love?

  He thought back to the day his mate Monty had realised he was in love with Faith and chuckled. He’d had to stop Monty rushing over to her house half-pissed in the middle of the night to confess his feelings. It had almost been as if his friend had lost all ability to reason, unable to focus on anything bar Faith. Slightly pissed himself, Adam had laughed at his best mate, unable to imagine himself in such a vulnerable predicament but now…

  Now, he felt exactly the same way.

  The thought of living another second without Stella, knowing the intensity of his feelings for her made his chest constrict. He wanted her by his side for the good times and the bad, and he wanted to be there for her as well. This included helping her raise Heidi and loving the little girl in the back seat as if he’d been present at her conception.

  As he pulled up in front of the homestead, it was all Adam could do to stop from reversing the car and speeding down the highway in pursuit of Ruby’s four-wheel drive. But he thought back to how excited Stella had looked when she’d finally slid into the back seat of Ruby’s car and he knew it wouldn’t kill him to wait another few hours. Maybe he’d wait up and land it on her when she arrived home at God-knows-what time in the morning. That thought made him grin. He tugged the keys out of the ignition, jumped out of the car and went round to help Heidi but she’d already unbuckled her seatbelt. Mutton jumped through to the back and scrambled over her to exit the car.

  Adam yelled, ‘Mutton, behave yourself,’ but Heidi simply squealed and then chased him up the garden path. He got her tea set out of the boot and then followed, only just making it onto the veranda in time to stop Mutton entering the house with Heidi.

  Grabbing the dog by his collar, he held him back as he toed off his boots. Then, he glanced over at Goldie in her perpetual spot at the end of the veranda. ‘Sorry, old girl,’ he said, as he let Mutton go again. As predicted the puppy raced across the decking to the ancient retriever and tried to rouse her from her slumber. Adam shook his head as he went inside, beginning to think he’d never make a sheep dog of Mutton, but unable to summon any disappointment over this fact. Heidi adored the dog and Stella had mentioned she’d always wanted a pet.

  Closing the door behind him, he walked through to the kitchen where he heard Heidi excitedly greeting his parents. The sight of his mum and dad sitting at the table playing a game of Sequence – a favourite Burton family board game – caused him to pause in the doorway. They looked so normal; anyone who didn’t know the heartbreak they were dealing with or the fact they were technically separated, would have thought them a middle-aged couple comfortable in their togetherness after years of marriage. He w
ondered if maybe now that they finally knew the truth, combined with his mum being so determined to recover, his parents would give their marriage a second chance.

  ‘Did they get away safely then?’

  Adam blinked, realising his mum had spoken, and then nodded. ‘Yes. Stella took a little convincing but I promised her we’d look after Heidi well.’

  ‘Of course we will.’ Esther beamed as she snuggled Heidi close. Aunty Ruth had tried to convince Esther to go with them but as Adam had expected, the idea had been too overwhelming. Although she’d made the decision to go back to counselling and hoped eventually to leave the farm again, the steps taken towards such an event would be baby ones and Adam didn’t want to pressure her for fear she’d retreat back into her shell.

  ‘Are you hungry, sweetheart?’ Esther asked, stroking Heidi’s hair back behind her ears.

  The little girl shook her head as she peered over the Sequence board, then thrust a finger towards it. ‘Play.’

  ‘This is a pretty tricky game,’ said Dave with a chuckle.

  Adam pulled a chair out and sat down. ‘Well, Heidi’s a pretty smart kid, so I reckon we give it a shot.’

  ‘All righty then.’ Dave shrugged and then swiped the board clean of its counters ready to dish them out again. ‘Let’s do it.’

  Chapter Twenty-four

  ‘I feel like Thelma and Louise!’ Frankie shrieked as she punched the air. Stella who sat squished between Frankie and Simone had to move her head slightly to avoid a run in with Frankie’s fist, but she laughed at the other woman’s excitement.

  ‘You need to get out more, sis,’ Simone teased.

  Frankie snorted. ‘Like you can talk. Your social life is worse than mine.’

  ‘Girls!’ Ruth peered around from the front passenger seat and gave her daughters a stern look. ‘What are you, twelve? I’m sorry, Ruby and Stella,’ she continued, turning back, ‘they’ve always bickered like cats and dogs.’

  Stella wondered if Ruth thought their over-excitement a little in bad taste in light of what had happened the past week but the smile she caught in the rear-view mirror said otherwise. No doubt she was as happy as her daughters to have a few hours reprieve from the intensity of staying at the homestead.

  ‘I was an only child and always wished I had a sister or brother to fight with,’ Ruby admitted as she turned the four-wheel drive onto the Brand Highway. ‘Do you have any brothers or sisters, Stella?’

  ‘Um,’ Stella swallowed. It hurt every time she talked about her family, so she’d gotten in the habit of never bringing the subject up. But she liked these women – could imagine them becoming good friends if she was sticking around – and she didn’t want to lie to them. ‘I’ve got one brother. He’s five years younger than me, though, so we’re not really close.’

  ‘Do you ever see him?’ Frankie asked.

  Stella shook her head, trying to ignore the tingling sensation in her eyeballs at this admission. Guilt often plagued her when she thought of Robbie. He’d been too young when she walked away from her parents to stay in touch, but he’d be nineteen now. Did he ever think of her? She often thought about him late at night and wondered what he was up to, what he’d gone on to do after finishing school. Maybe she should swallow the fear of facing him after all these years and make contact. Despite living with her parents, there was no guarantee he shared their views on Heidi and it would be wonderful to have him in their lives again.

  ‘I wouldn’t let it get you down too much,’ Ruth said, an edge of bitterness in her tone. ‘Trust me, siblings aren’t always what they’re cracked up to be.’

  No one said anything for a while, all of them thinking the same thought as Stella – that Esther’s brother Tom was also Ruth’s and right now both women probably wished they’d never had a brother. Eventually, Simone reached forward and placed her hand on Ruth’s shoulder. ‘It’s okay, Mum. I know you’ve been trying to keep it together for Aunty Esther but you’re allowed to be upset. He was your brother, too.’

  Ruth sniffed. ‘And all I can think right now is that I’m so glad it was Lily-Blue and not one of you. How awful does that make me?’

  ‘Mum. You’re not awful,’ Simone and Frankie rushed to assure her.

  Ruby, the voice of reason, said, ‘I think what you’re feeling is perfectly normal. It’s not like you’re happy about your niece but of course you are glad your own daughters were safe.’

  ‘Yes,’ Stella agreed, thinking of Heidi.

  ‘I always thought Uncle Tom was a bit freaky,’ Simone admitted and all eyes snapped to her.

  ‘Did you?’ Ruth asked.

  ‘You never said anything to me,’ Frankie said accusingly.

  Simone shrugged. ‘Oh, not when we were young. I don’t remember him being that interested in any of us since Lily-Blue was the only one who ever wanted to play his precious piano, but when Harriet was little he once said something that made my skin crawl.’

  ‘What was it?’ Ruth asked.

  ‘She was wearing a fairy outfit with a pretty pink tutu and he said she had great legs.’

  Ruth closed her eyes and pressed her hand against her chest.

  ‘Ew.’ Frankie screwed up her face. ‘And you never said anything?’

  ‘I told Mick at the time and he reckoned I was making it out to be more than it was. Oh God,’ she dropped her head in her hands. ‘Thank God I never left him alone with either of the girls.’

  ‘So do you think Tom was a pervert then? As well as a cold-blooded killer?’ asked Frankie.

  ‘Enough.’ Ruth held up a hand. ‘This is supposed to be a fun night out, let’s not ruin it with wondering about stuff we might never know.’

  ‘You’re right.’ Simone nodded. ‘I’m sorry, Mum. It’s just so hard to come to terms with.’

  ‘I know.’ Ruth offered a peace-making smile. Then, ‘So, what movie are we going to see?’

  Everyone welcomed the change of subject and a debate ensued about whether the Ryan Reynolds chick flick or a Henry Cavill action adventure was the movie to see. All agreed they’d suffer through blood, gore and any number of fight scenes for Henry Cavill but when a chick-flick with Ryan the Hottie was also on offer, it was a no-brainer.

  ‘The first time I met Adam,’ Ruby announced, ‘I thought he looked exactly like Ryan Reynolds.’

  Stella met Ruby’s gaze in the rear-view mirror and realised she’d directed this observation pointedly at her. She flushed, but luckily the others hadn’t appeared to notice.

  ‘Seriously?’ Frankie sounded appalled by the suggestion. ‘I know he’s my cousin and all and I’d be blind not to notice his manly credentials but is he really in Ryan’s realm?’

  Oh yeah, he really is, thought Stella, biting her tongue as her mind flooded with memories of the last few nights.

  ‘What do you think, Stella?’ Simone asked, a twinkle in her eye.

  ‘Um.’ Stella’s mouth went dry. I think he’s the most wonderful man on the planet, was all she could think of to say. I think he’s kind and sexy and incredibly good between the sheets and against my better judgment I’ve fallen in love with him. There. Happy now?

  ‘She’s blushing,’ Frankie shrieked, clearly amused and excited by this fact.

  ‘Am not.’ But Stella turned her head so she didn’t have to look the other woman in the eye.

  ‘Has something happened between you while you’ve been staying at his place?’ Simone asked.

  Inwardly groaning, Stella turned again, but with Simone on one side and Frankie on the other she had nowhere to look. As the heat in her cheeks got even hotter, she decided talking about her brother or even her and Adam’s gruesome discovery would be preferable to this. She wanted to keep what Adam and she shared together secret. If his family started getting ideas it might make whatever time they had left together awkward. He might back off if he got pressure from them and she didn’t want that. She already knew her heart would be broken when she went back to the monotony and routine of her Perth life, but
she’d deal with that problem then.

  ‘No,’ she said eventually, but her lie sounded unconvincing even to herself.

  ‘I wouldn’t blame you if it had,’ Simone encouraged. ‘In fact, I’d be stoked.’

  ‘Me too,’ said Frankie and Ruby at the same time.

  Simone nodded. ‘We all adore Adam. He’s a great catch and nothing would make us happier than to see him settled with someone as utterly lovely and gorgeous as you.’

  Oh, now Stella had a different kind of lump in her throat altogether. She didn’t just love Adam; she loved his friends and family as well. It was so easy to picture her and Heidi making Bunyip Bay her home. Becoming part of this community had helped ease some of the pain she still experienced at the loss of her own family. She supposed she could move up here of her own accord but could her heart cope living near Adam but not with him?

  ‘Leave poor Stella alone,’ Ruth chastised, glaring again at her daughters. ‘How’d you two like it if I started grilling you about your love lives?’

  Simone slumped against the window and Frankie snorted. ‘What love life?’

  Stella couldn’t help but laugh. She understood their plights more than she let on. When she’d arrived in Bunyip Bay and said she wasn’t looking for a man it had been the absolute truth, but now the thought of not turning her fling with Adam into a relationship made her want to lie down on the floor and pummel her fists into the ground. Luckily they were in a four-wheel drive.

  ‘I think we should make a pact,’ Ruby decided. The others were all ears and so she continued, ‘No more man talk. Tonight is for the girls. Although I’m crazy in love with Drew I still know how to have a good time on my own and I know you ladies do, too. So, what do you say? Anyone who mentions the M-word has to pay a fine.’

  Stella was quick to agree. ‘I love it.’

  ‘Fine by me,’ Ruth said.

  ‘How much?’ Frankie asked.

  Heidi impressed them all with her dedication to learning the game of Sequence and her attention span, which kept her focused for almost an hour, but the moment she’d had enough, the first words out of her mouth were, ‘Look for Whiskers?’