The bed shifted as Ronni slid up beside her and relaxed back. Sierra braced herself. It was time for some sage advice on stalking, or relationships, or whatever.
“Wiley, I love you. I really do. And I love how passionate you get. While I’ve never seen you so passionate about a person, I am glad you’re evolving. I want you to find your happily-ever-after. With that said, I can see you’re hunkered down for my mom speech, so here it goes…”
Ronni turned to face her fully. She took Sierra’s hands in her own and gave them a squeeze of support. “You may have been a little umm…scary, finding out where she was and showing up at her clinic. I mean, you just met. But I know these feelings are new to you. Still, it seemed she took it well. I do think she likes you, but Sierra, you got to give a girl some space. You have no claim to her. You haven’t even gone out on a date. And what did she say when you almost kissed? Something like ‘she couldn’t right now,’ right? For all you know she may be single again. Of course, you could chalk it up to infatuation and find someone new.”
Sierra shook her head adamantly. “I don’t want to find someone new. She makes me feel something. She makes me want more. I’ve never had that before. It was always just sex. It’s like she ruined me and we haven’t even had a date yet.”
Ronni nodded her head in understanding. “Then you need to talk to her. As much as I hate to take her side, I don’t think she meant to hurt you. Take the time to clear your head. Think things over. If you like her as much as you say you do, then you have to give her a chance to explain. Only then can you decide if it’s something you can move past or not. But, and I am only going to say this once, you had better not go running back to Harley if you guys don’t work out. You got it?”
Rolling her eyes, Sierra said, “Don’t worry. I’m done with that.”
“I’ve heard that before.” Folding her arms across her chest, Ronni looked less than convinced. “That’s all from mother-knows-best tonight. I’m off to meet Blake and the gang. Why don’t you come with? Drown your sorrows, or who knows, maybe find someone to take your mind off her.”
“I don’t know, Ronni. I just want a hot bath, a beer, and some chocolate,” Sierra whined.
Ronni hopped to her feet and towered over her. “That’s a big negatory, Wiley. As your best friend, it is my job to keep you company during the hard times. I will not allow you to wallow in self-pity right now. So…” She reached down, grabbed one arm, and pulled. “Up and at ‘em. Get cleaned up and meet me downstairs in fifteen.” With a quick once over at Sierra’s shoddy appearance, she added, “I better give you twenty.”
“Gee, thanks.” Sierra huffed.
Words couldn’t express how much she didn’t want to go out, but maybe Ronni was right. Maybe, being alone wasn’t a good idea. Silence would give her thoughts a chance to fester. But she would be damned if she was going to make it easy on Ronni. Sierra groaned as Ronni pulled again. She laid dead weight on the bed, making her best friend work hard to achieve her goal.
“You need a night on the town to take your mind off your lady troubles.” Ronni pulled again. “Damn, you’re heavy.”
“You’re making me feel so much better about myself.”
“Shut up.” Ronni snickered and yanked again, this time making headway as Sierra’s body slid toward the edge. She dug in and pulled one more time, leaving Sierra’s right side hanging halfway off the bed
Satisfied that her point had been made, Ronni released Sierra’s arm and set her hands on her hips. “Now…whew!” She huffed and puffed with exertion. “Move it. We’re gonna light this town up!" Ronni hopped with excitement, flashed a wink, and then bolted out the door.
CHAPTER TWELVE
Alone with her thoughts, Kara nursed her fourth glass of white wine. That case of Riesling she’d bought for Valentine’s Day was coming in handy. The room was in a slow spin as she laid her head atop the back of the sofa and kicked her feet up on the coffee table. An empty bottle laid prone on the floor awaiting a visit from its companion, the half-empty bottle on the end table. A fuzzy version of the afternoon’s events replayed in her mind on loop. She had hurt Sierra. She had hurt Jamie. She had let Jamie hurt Sierra.
How did things get so out of hand? Oh right, avoidance and stupidity.
Of course, who could have predicted Sierra would happen? Kara had never been so taken with anyone before. Sierra had hit her hard and fast, leaving her reeling in a class five whitewater of emotions. Fighting the current had been impossible, so she had given up and allowed her heart to guide her to calmer water. She had finally set out to erase the one obstacle in their way, but then Sierra had struck again—like a tsunami, seemingly innocent and mesmerizing to watch, until it reached shore and plowed a path of devastation. Kara had let herself get sucked into the innocent beauty and lost sight of her purpose. Now she was left to clean up the aftermath.
Sierra…
Kara hummed and smiled. Sierra had appeared in her doorway in her baggy shorts with an air of confidence, muscled legs, gorgeous, soulful eyes, and a smile that made Kara’s chest thump like a herd of running elephants. The feeling of being pursued so wholeheartedly had left her brimming with indescribable sensations, but now her chest grew heavy and her breath restricted to the point of dizziness. The thought of Sierra being angry with her was too much to bear.
Would she get the chance to explain?
No one had ever left her questioning so much about her life. Sierra brought her back to a time and place when she was unhindered by the rigid routine she had set for herself. She was free to do as she pleased. Free to live. Free to feel. And boy did she want to feel. She ached to feel every inch of Sierra Cody’s toned body against hers.
“Why does she have to be so damned hot?” Kara grumbled.
The sudden realization that she was drunk and alone crept in and she criticized herself for being so pathetic. In a moment of clarity, it dawned upon her that she wasn’t the least bit concerned about how Jamie felt, which made her feel a little guilty. Jamie was sweet and they had gotten along well, but they had never clicked in the “right” ways—whatever those ways were supposed to be. They had been more like close friends with occasional benefits, though it was obvious Jamie had always believed they shared something more. The desire for “something more” with another person had never been a concern for Kara, so she couldn’t relate to what Jamie had wanted so badly. That is, until now.
She couldn’t put a finger on when her priorities had shifted. When had she first shunned the free spirit who had raced motocross in favor of the solitude of her science? What catalyst had prompted her to shut out the possibility of emotional connections? A question better left to a sober mind, but that was non-existent tonight. Besides, there was a more pressing matter to tend to in the form of an alluring rider that had captured her fancy.
How do I fix this mess?
Fumbling with her phone, she hovered her fingers above the keys. She could send a text. A nice little “Hi Sierra” would surely clear things up. "Stttuuupid," she mumbled with a touch of a slur. Given the circumstances, that would have been pretty shitty. Sierra deserved better.
Should she call? God no! Not only could she not even fathom more drama tonight, but she was at a loss for words. And the ones she did have likely wouldn’t come out clearly enough to understand anyway. With an aggravated groan, she decided to table it until tomorrow. She would sober up and then talk to Nicole.
Until then, no more thinking. There was a bottle of wine to finish.
***
With the dawn of a new day, came the vengeance of last night’s binge, but Kara suffered the consequences with few complaints. Her pain had been self-inflicted. There was no one to blame but herself. By afternoon, she had managed a respectable recovery from her hangover and headed to the clinic. Nicole had requested her presence before she returned to Bend—which was a good thing, because she was in desperate need of advice.
The ride to her office was filled with much of the same sel
f-doubt that had hovered over her since Sierra had peeled out of her driveway. She wanted to talk things out, but wasn’t sure how the situation should be handled. Should she pay Sierra a visit, or give her space?
But now that her mind was clear, she was seeing things in a different light. Kara had reasons of her own to be upset. Technically, she hadn’t done anything wrong. She had resisted the urge to kiss Sierra. Sure, she had led her on a bit, but she was serious in her interest and had been careful not to cross a line until after she’d had a chance to end things with Jamie. That Sierra’s tone had insinuated she was a cheater had stung. They hadn’t gone out on an official date. They were just two women having fun. That was what she kept telling herself, but she knew better and Sierra did have a right to be hurt.
Stepping into Nicole’s office, Kara shut the door softly behind her. Nicole was diligently working on a patient file, tapping away at the computer screen without acknowledging her presence.
“So,” Nicole began, still typing away. “I’m guessing from your drunk text last night things didn’t go well with Jamie.” Putting an exclamation point on her work with a forceful tap of the enter key, she pushed the keyboard away, looked up, and gave her friend a once over.
“That’s the understatement of the year.” Kara lumbered slowly toward Nicole’s desk. She ran her hand over the dark wood before perching on the edge. Taking a deep breath, her gaze drifted to the ceiling as she recounted the night’s events and the drama that ensued.
“I’m not sure what I’m supposed to do now, Nic.” Kara’s fingers rubbed vigorous circles around her temples. “I mean, yes, Sierra can be upset, but in all fairness, I could be upset that she dropped by unannounced and uninvited. Plus, we didn’t do anything but flirt, so it’s not like we have a claim to one another or anything. Ugh! So much distracting drama. See? This is why I stay in my work bubble,” she finished with an exasperated sigh.
“Well…” Nicole released a sigh of her own. “I guess you could go back to your work bubble then. You are single again, so you can do what you want. Let Sierra go and drown yourself in what you love most—research. Maybe someday you’ll want more. Maybe you’re just not ready yet. Maybe you never will be. Not everyone is cut out to live the relationship lifestyle.”
The last part came across as nonchalant, but it was an obvious goading in hopes of getting a reaction. And it had worked. Despite Kara’s best efforts to avoid giving Nicole the satisfaction, a crease of frustration traversed her forehead as she thought long and hard.
Letting Sierra go sounded easy in theory, but the thing about theories was they were hypothetical. Even with the little bit of time they had spent together, the woman had already seeped under her skin. Kara could deny it all she wanted, there was no letting Sierra Cody go, at least not without some heartbreak of her own. She narrowed her eyes at Nicole, who sat in silence with a smug grin of victory that aggravated the hell out of her. Kara may have had a high IQ, but Nic knew people, and she really knew Kara.
“On the other hand, my dear Kara, I saw that spark in your eyes when she came in. You may have been stunned by her impromptu visit, but you were happy to see her. It would be such a shame to hide from that. You don’t get many opportunities to be happy in life and you had already been going on and on about her. You’re smitten.”
While those words soaked into Kara’s brain, Nicole stood from her chair and smoothed the non-existent wrinkles from her tan slacks as if it would somehow wipe away the mess of the last twenty-four hours. “Now, on a business note,” she shifted gears, “I think we should sponsor her racing career.”
“Umm…I’m sorry, what?” Kara’s face contorted in bewilderment. How could her best friend suggest forming a business relationship with the woman she had just hurt so deeply? “Are you crazy? She hates me.”
“Maybe. Maybe not.” Folding her arms across her chest, Nicole paused with the quiet confidence one would expect of a top executive commanding a board room. “I looked her up after you left. Sierra is quite talented. And stubborn. I read she’s turned down team offers before, preferring to remain independent and do things on her own terms. That choice is noble, but leaves her borrowing equipment when her aggressive style tears up her bike. We want to broaden our field in sports-related work anyway, so who better than her?”
Kara stared blankly at the wall behind Nicole. Her chest seized, allowing little air into her already exhausted body, bringing about a lightheadedness akin to high-altitude exposure. Her brain, which could quickly piece together diagnoses and treatment plans, was clueless about relationships. Her mind floated aimlessly in a sea of questions with no sign of an answer to anchor her. How was she supposed to focus on this new business venture now?
“I don’t know, Nic,” she answered with skepticism.
Nicole’s arms fell to her sides as she walked around her desk to stand by Kara’s side. “Look, Kara…” Nicole took her hand, pulling her thoughts to safety as she drew her attention. “It makes sense, business wise. You know she can be a champion. She just needs to put it all together. We can help with that. Sierra is the dawning of a new age of talent in her sport. No woman rides like her and eventually, whether she knows it yet or not, she will need some support. I would like it to be us. Plus, women supporting women…It’s a win-win,” she finished with conviction as she straightened her posture once again and flashed a confident smile.
Kara shook her head, apprehension etched all over her face. “Of course, you would find a way to turn this into a marketing opportunity,” she said with a harsh laugh. “But I don’t know if she will. Not only was yesterday a huge disaster, but she’s a lot more sensitive over the team topic than you’d think. She even thought I was trying to lure her to Team Traxx with the research offer.”
The veil of sadness dropped once again as she recalled that day. As tough and strong as Sierra was in all her bad-ass glory, she was also quite vulnerable. Kara kicked herself for not realizing it sooner. She never would have missed that with a patient, but in her personal life, she was as blind as the three mice in the childhood nursery rhyme. If she were to pursue anything with Sierra, business or pleasure, she would need to be more considerate in her actions.
Her eyes dropped to the floor, shifting her thoughts from her personal problems to Nicole’s proposal. She had a point. Whether Sierra would agree or not was irrelevant. She was an amazing talent with a high ceiling of potential and Kara wanted to see her reach the top. Having no interest in controlling Sierra’s daily activities, they could offer her stability without making demands.
“You are right though, she is definitely the future of the sport. Draw up a proposal and I’ll work on it. Now, can we get back to my problem?” She arched an eyebrow in challenge.
“Of course, Doctor Davies.” Nicole’s hearty laugh filled the room, finally pulling a hint of a smile from Kara. “We have a tough case to solve, my good friend, but solve it, we will.”
CHAPTER THIRTEEN
For the last two nights, Ronni had tried her hardest to help numb Sierra’s pain, but now that she was alone and sober, Sierra was just as angry, hurt, confused, and smitten as she had been before. Partying had accomplished nothing but a hangover, loss of riding time, and a huge hole in her wallet. She groaned and rested her head in her left hand as she played solitaire on her phone at the far end of the bar. The glass of stout Axel had set beside her twenty minutes ago dripped with the perspiration of a three-hundred-pound man in Moab in the dead of summer, but she was in no hurry to put it out of its misery…or herself out of her own.
Kara had left three messages over the last three days and Sierra was at a crossroads at whether or not to respond. The hurt from being lied to was still fresh, but as Ronni had said, Kara didn’t belong to her, so she should at least let her explain. Knowing a truth and acting accordingly, however, were two distinctly different things. Widely known to act out of emotion first, Sierra had learned the hard way that a knee-jerk response only made things more difficult. In fear of b
eing spiteful and saying something she’d regret, she chose to wait. The quiet company of her beer was much a safer bet for now.
Sierra jumped when a hand slammed down hard on the bar top beside her.
Camryn smirked at her agitated response, then prodded with a laugh. “Aww, party for one? How sad.” Her thick Australian accent coated her words.
With an unimpressed roll of her eyes, Sierra returned to her beer. Usually, she would engage Camryn in a parry of quips, but she wasn’t in the mood.
“What’s your problem?” Camryn drummed her fingers on the bar top as she awaited a retort. “Finally get an S.T.D. from all your whoring around?”
When no response came, she mumbled to herself, then stared down the length of the bar at Axel. “Hey barkeep,” she called out. “Give me something strong.” She then turned back to Sierra, who refused to acknowledge her presence.
Axel slid a shot of light amber liquor toward her without a word. He picked up a towel, slapped it over his shoulder, then moved toward a couple who had taken a seat. Camryn threw it back, wiped her mouth with the back of her hand, and then occupied the stool beside Sierra.
“I love a good whiskey. Don’t you?” Camryn asked as she sat staring, refusing to budge until Sierra acknowledged her.
“What do you want?” Sierra asked, her eyes still set on the glass in front of her and not on the woman so anxiously awaiting their attention. Her hands slid up and cupped the sides of the mug, the perspiration coating her palms.
Camryn shrugged. “I don’t know. Guess I’m just curious.”
Sierra fought her anger, refusing to give Camryn any satisfaction. Instead, she forced a sweet smile and smartly inquired, “About what? Why no one likes you, or why you can’t beat me?”
A shapely lip curled upward in amusement before Camryn replied, “Aren’t you cheeky?” She tapped the bar top signaling her need for another drink. “I’m curious about what put old Wiley Cody’s panties in a bunch. For Christ’s sakes, you’re wasting a perfectly good beer. That’s a sin where I come from.”
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