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Next morning, Geoff woke up with a hard on he could hammer nails in with. He'd dreamt about fucking Ben all night. He groaned putting his arm over his eyes. God, he hoped Ben wanted to give a relationship a try. If last night was anything to go by, then Ben did.
Geoff listened to Ben moving around and looked at the time. It was past eleven. He groaned again before he pulled back the covers and walked into the en-suite. After a quick shower, and orgasm, he dressed and went downstairs. He found Ben in the kitchen cooking sausages.
"God, that smells good."
Ben smiled at him. "Yeah. When I lived with my Nan, we always had sausage sandwiches on Sunday. Any plans for the day?"
"I have some work to finish up, and then I thought we could go out."
"Trafford Centre."
Geoff looked at Ben blankly. "You want to go to the Trafford Centre on a Sunday. Do you know how busy it'll be?" Seriously? The Trafford Centre on a Sunday?
Ben nodded. "Yep. I've never really had the chance to go before. I was always on the outside looking in. I mean, what was the point? I couldn't afford anything, and the way I dressed? Well, I would probably have had security following me around." Ben shrugged as he started to butter the bread.
"I never really thought about that in regards to you." Now he was thinking about it, and how it would have affected Ben. He realised there must have been so many things Ben had missed.
"You helped Matt and Luke out, didn't you?" Ben asked, interrupting his thoughts.
"I knew you all needed clothes, but I never thought about the why in depth."
"You never had the need to." Ben shrugged. "It was just that way for us. Whatever money we made we tried to keep for as long as possible. None of us liked what we were doing."
"I've been meaning to ask you. How did you avoid drugs?"
"I hadn't been on the streets long when I ran into Adam, and he was pretty clued up, or so I thought. I didn't know he was secretly taking. Then we met Tom and, for someone as young as us, he had his head on straight and he helped me to avoid things like that. Plus, you could see what it did to people who were taking drugs. The number of overdoses I saw..." Ben shook his head staring out of the window. "It was a way to escape. Who knows, maybe someday down the line that would have been me? You can't live that type of life for a long time. I know you see older people on the streets, but if you look closely, you can tell they have some form of habit. Most people end up developing one."
"When I've talked to Seb about this, he always expresses his amazement at how Tom avoided falling into those pitfalls. He always tells me how strong Tom is mentally."
Ben placed a plate full of sausage sandwiches in front of Geoff and a cup of coffee. "Thanks."
"You're welcome. I don't know where I would've been if it weren't for Adam and Tom."
Silence descended as they ate their food and when they had finished, Geoff cleared the kitchen. He then went to his study to finish some work before getting ready to go out. He found Ben in the living room watching TV.
"Anything interesting?"
Ben chuckled. "Nah. I forgot how bad Sunday TV is."
"Yeah, it is. Are you ready to go?" He wasn't looking forward to this at all.
Ben stood up and stretched, his shirt riding up to reveal his abs. Geoff watched and felt his dick start to get hard. Not the right time! Not when he was about to endure the torture that was Sunday shopping at The Trafford Centre. Still, a kiss would be nice.
As Ben went to walk past him, Geoff reached out and grabbed his arm, pulling Ben towards him. Ben looked up at him with his lips parted, and Geoff took advantage. He bent over and kissed him, slipping his tongue into Ben's open mouth. He felt Ben's tongue stroke along his own and moaned as Ben's taste flooded his mouth. God, he loved kissing Ben already.
When Ben's arms reached around his neck, Geoff pulled him closer, resting his hands on Ben's hips. He slowly moved his hips against Ben's, feeling Ben's erection against his own. He moved his hands up Ben's body until he was holding Ben's face. He slowly pulled back and looked at Ben. His eyes were closed, and he was panting slightly.
"Still want to go out?"
Ben's eyes opened and he narrowed them. "Are you trying to distract me?"
Geoff took a step back and placed a hand on his chest with a mock gasp. "Who? Me?"
Ben placed his hands on his hips and looked directly at him. "Yes. You. We are still going."
Geoff sighed dramatically. "If we must."
"My God. You'd think I was taking you to your execution."
"I might prefer it," Geoff mumbled to himself as he went to get his coat.
"Sorry? What was that?"
"Er, nothing?"
"Hmmm. Come on. We can have something to eat there, and I can tell you what I've been thinking of doing."
Geoff grabbed his keys and wallet and walked out to the car, pressing the fob to open it. He locked up behind him as Ben got into the car. It took them almost thirty minutes to get there and when they did it took another five minutes to find a parking space.
"Are you sure about this? We can still leave," Geoff asked Ben hopefully as he turned off the engine.
"We're here now. Come on, it won't be too bad."
"You say that now."
They got out, locked up and walked into the Trafford Centre. Almost immediately, the noise hit them. There were children laughing, screaming and crying, people talking, the music from the system overhead. People were walking in any direction and bumping into other people and not seeming to care.
Geoff watched Ben stare in awe at what he would describe as an organised chaos before he turned to him and smiled. "I'm so looking forward to this."
Geoff stared at Ben, groaning. "You're looking forward to this?" he asked as he manoeuvred himself around a group of teenagers who seemed to have set up residence in the middle of the mall.
"Yeah. I never got to do any of this."
Geoff looked at Ben. "Didn't your mum or Derek take you?"
"Why would they do that? They didn't give a shit about me."
Well, that decided it, didn't it? "Let's go then." Goof took Ben's arm and started walking towards the nearest shop.
"Can I go to all the shops?"
"Seriously?"
Ben nodded.
"You want to go into Ann Summers?"
"They sell toys, don't they?" Ben asked as he looked away, five different shades of red.
Geoff leaned down and whispered in his ear, "You want toys, do you?"
Ben shrugged, still not looking at Geoff. "I might. I don't know yet."
Grabbing his hand, Geoff forced his way through the bustling crowd. Ben pretty much went into every single shop there. It didn't matter if he was interested in what they had to sell or not. Seriously, prams? But Geoff didn't say anything. It was clear Ben was enjoying himself as he dragged Geoff around.
He had to admit, some of the toys he saw were great. They didn't have them when he was growing up, and he was tempted to buy some under the guise they were for his nephews. They eventually took a break for something to eat in the food hall, which took almost thirty minutes of queuing, and then they started again. When they came to Ann Summers, Ben blushed and shook his head before walking on, pulling Geoff behind him.
By the time they left it was almost four and Ben was laden down with bags. Geoff had bought clothes for Ben along with other items he may need. Ben had tried to refuse but Geoff had told him to just accept it for now. He needed the things and Geoff had liked buying them for him.
When they arrived home, Ben went straight to the kitchen and started pulling ingredients out from the fridge. "Omelette sound okay?"
"Yeah. We had a large lunch. Want me to do anything?"
"Could you make a salad?"
They worked together in the kitchen and made idle conversation as they ate. Geoff cleared up and then followed Ben into the living room. The temperature was starting to drop outside, so he decided to make a fire. Once
it was going, he sat next to Ben on the sofa, pulling him close.
"Did you enjoy today?" Geoff asked him.
Ben looked up at him smiling, dimples showing. "Yeah, but I wouldn't do it all the time. I feel sorry for parents trying to control their kids when out in a place like that."
"That's why I try not to go at the weekends. It always packed."
Ben suddenly yawned. "Think I'll head on up to bed. All I've done is walk around some shops, but I'm tired. I'll see you in the morning."
Geoff stood up when Ben did and pulled him in for a kiss. He gently rubbed his lips across Ben's before releasing him.
"Night, Ben."
"Night, Geoff, and thanks for today. I appreciate it."
"You're welcome."
CHAPTER ELEVEN
The next couple of weeks followed the same pattern; Ben would cook dinner for them both and keep the house clean. It gave him the opportunity to write in his journal and keep his appointments with Dr Rimmer.
Ben hadn't wanted to see anyone at first, had fought against it, but now that he was going, he had to admit that the sessions were helping. The things that had happened when he was younger, things he had shut away, were now coming out into the open, and even though they were painful, he was glad to feel finally free of them. So many incidents from his past, the beatings, being locked in the cupboard naked, the forced starvation, were all coming out.
He'd met with Tom for lunch a few times and had talked a lot about Adam. He was sure that the conversations helped both of them. It certainly helped him. The feelings of guilt he'd had over Adam's murder were slowly disappearing.
Tom had been right, well, they all had. It wasn't his fault that Adam had run off that night. They had all tried to reach out to Adam, but he hadn't wanted any help. Maybe he had become too reckless, and it had ultimately ended with him losing his life. Or it could have been the fact that he'd been on drugs. From what Ben understood, Adam hadn't been taking them for long. How the professionals knew that, Ben didn't know. Maybe toxicology reports. But Adam being on drugs had led to him taking chances he wouldn't have normally taken.
Talking to Geoff about what he thought he should do with his life, and after meeting with Tom, Matt and Luke, he had decided to go to college. Geoff was looking into him finding out what his exam results had been, and then he would decide what he wanted to study. Things he hadn't even dreamed of doing were now within his reach, and Ben wanted to make sure he made the right choices.
The situation between him and Geoff was going well too. Slow, but good. Ben wanted to take things further, but Geoff didn't seem to want to rush. He'd looked at some more websites and wanted to know more, but whenever he brought the subject up with Geoff, he would smile and say they would talk about it later.
Ben wasn't sure how much more he could take. He wanted to do things with Geoff. More than the kissing they had shared. He hadn't even come with him since that time in Geoff's living room, and he was becoming frustrated. Having an orgasm by himself wasn't cutting it anymore. He'd even talked to Tom about it when they had met up for lunch, and Tom had reassured him that Geoff was thinking of him.
They had gone to Geoff's brother Harry's home a couple of times, and they had welcomed him in with open arms. Lou was wonderful with the boys, and the boys had made him laugh so hard that his stomach ached with the trouble they caused. It was nice being included in a loving family. Something he had never experienced when living at home.
So he was now sat in the kitchen deciding on how to convince Geoff to move things forward. Maybe he should tie himself up on Geoff's bed, naked. He chuckled to himself, thinking about the look Geoff would have on his face if he walked into that.
The other option was one he'd been toying with for a few days now, but wasn't sure if he had the courage to go through with it.
Submission.
The thought of kneeling naked, waiting for Geoff both excited and scared him. Part of him liked the idea of handing control over to someone else. He'd had to be in control of everything for so long that he wanted to hand it over to someone else and let go.
Ben looked at the clock, and realising how late it was getting, quickly made a vegetable chilli, and then went upstairs to shower. He dried himself and looked in the mirror. He'd put on some weight and now looked far healthier than when he had first arrived. His ribs didn't stick out as much now and his face looked fuller. His blue/green eyes had a sparkle to them now and he'd lost the pale, washed out look.
Taking a deep breath, he walked downstairs and checked the food, then knelt on the floor. God, he hoped Geoff came home soon because the floor was cold and was going to hurt his knees.
When he heard the key in the door, he suddenly tensed, muscles going rigid, his stomach turning, wondering if he'd made the right decision, but before he could get up and get dressed, Geoff walked in. He listened as he walked through the house and entered the kitchen. With his head down, the only thing he could see was Geoff's shoes.
Ben watched the shoes move away, and he listened to Geoff put his briefcase down and what sounded like his jacket coming off. The shoes appeared in front of him again, and he was tempted to sneak a peek up at Geoff to see what expression he had on his face.
"Stand."
This was it. Ben took a deep breath in and stood, keeping his eyes on the floor, like he'd read. He felt Geoff's fingers under his chin and slowly his head was raised up. When he was looking at Geoff, he saw him smile.
"Good boy."
Ben shivered when he heard those words. Good boy. It did something to him, something he couldn't quite explain. Warm. Tingly. Hard.
"Go upstairs and put some clothes on, then we'll talk about what I expect from you."
Something of the disappointment that Ben felt must have shown on his face because Geoff pulled him in and kissed him hard, before pushing him away.
"Dressed. Now," Geoff told him in a low authoritative tone, his stare intense.
Ben swallowed, nodded and quickly went upstairs to dress before racing back down. What had he done wrong? Ben was aware he didn't know everything to this lifestyle, but he didn't think he'd messed up.
When he walked into the kitchen, Geoff was serving the food and pointed to the stool. Ben sat and waited for Geoff to join him. When he also sat, Ben rushed through what he wanted to say.
"I'm sorry. What did I do wrong?" he asked, pushing his food around his bowl.
"Nothing, but I think I need to explain to you what I want from our relationship. I like to dominate, but only in the bedroom. I like total control in that aspect of my relationships. I don't expect to have control anywhere else."
"Oh. So I shouldn't have been kneeling? Oh God, I'm so sorry..." Ben dropped his head into his hands and groaned, his face flooding with heat. Ben's stomach tensed and he squeezed his eyes shut. Please let Geoff be gone when I open them.
"Stop," Geoff told him, pulling Ben's hands away. "You couldn't have known, but it does tell me that you might want to move forward with this. I wanted you to be sure. I don't want you to think that I expect sex because you're living here. I don't want you thinking that because of your past I'm expecting you to perform." Geoff paused, staring intently at Ben. "Are you sure you want to do this?" he asked.
Ben swallowed, looking away. The way Geoff was staring at him like he was his sole focus was a little daunting. To know that this man would have control over a certain aspect of his life? Scary, but also exhilarating, freeing. Being able to relinquish control to someone else eased a part in him he hadn't realised had been too tightly wound.
Looking back at Geoff, Ben nodded. "Yeah. I've thought a lot about this. Yes, I'm scared, but I know that I want to try this, with you."
Geoff watched him for another minute before nodding and continuing to eat. "Eat your food, Ben."
Ben suddenly didn't feel hungry, but ate some anyway. When he'd had enough, he pushed his bowl away and started to clear up.
"We need to talk about Adam's funeral."
Ben stood up from where he had been putting the dirty dishes into the dishwasher and stared at Geoff. Closing his eyes, Ben dropped his head. God, he'd never even thought about Adam's funeral. He didn't even know where to begin with arranging one, let alone how he was going to pay it.
"I haven't....shit." What sort of friend was he to forget about Adam?
"His body's still at the morgue, but we can go ahead and arrange a funeral."
Gasping, Ben asked, "Has no one come forward to claim him?"
"Not from his family, no. From what I can gather, they located his family, but they didn't want anything to do with him. So, his body has been in the morgue. I've looked at costs, and it isn't cheap."
"Fuck! I don't know how I can pay for one. I don't have a job, and I'm living here for free." What the fuck was he supposed to do? He couldn't leave him there. He paced the kitchen floor, running his hand through his hair when Geoff stood in front of him, placing his hands on his shoulders, halting his pacing.
"I've spoken with Tom and Seb and we'll pay for it."
"What?" Ben shook his head. "No. No, you can't do that. You didn't even know him!"
"But you and Tom did. What kind of person would I be to leave it to you, Tom, and the others to sort it out, knowing what you've been through? Seb and I agree: we'll arrange it and pay for it. However, if you want to help out when you can, then that's fine. I know Tom is putting something towards it, and I also know Matt and Luke will try as well. Adam was lucky to have friends like you."
Geoff offering to pay was more than he had ever expected, and his eyes started to burn. He blinked rapidly to try and stop the tears from falling, but failed. Geoff pull him in and held him as he cried, rubbing his back. Ben was going to bury his friend. He was finally going to have the chance to say goodbye.
After a few minutes, he pulled back and Geoff handed him a tissue. Wiping his eyes and blowing his nose, Ben grimaced. Bet he looked good with snot on his face. "God, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to snot all over you."
New Beginnings (Second Chances Book 2) Page 10