Nothing to Fear

by Claire Boston

  Fleur got up and poured more drinks for everyone. “What’s he like?”

  “I’ve only seen him once. He’s cute. He looks like his father.”

  “So you reckon Ryan’s cute?” Kit’s tone was triumphant.

  “No!” Hannah groaned. She’d walked into that one. “The boy is cute.”

  “And so is Ryan.” Kit wasn’t going to give up.

  Hannah sighed as she gave them what they wanted, forcing some enthusiasm into her tone. “I wouldn’t call Ryan cute. I’d call him hot – like scorching.”

  The girls cackled in glee. “I’m going to have to drop by the police station tomorrow,” Mai said. “And check him out.”

  “It’s worth a trip,” Kit agreed and turned to Hannah. “Are you going to ask him out?”

  She shook her head. “I don’t know anything about him.”

  “That’s the point of dating,” Fleur said. “You’ll get to know him. Besides, you had a massive crush on him in primary school.”

  Mai perked up. “Did she?” Mai had arrived in Blackbridge after Ryan had moved away.

  Kit nodded. “You should have heard the stories she used to make up about him. I swear, sometimes she came to my place hoping to get a glimpse of him on the drive out.”

  Hannah’s face heated. Kit’s statement had a smidgen of truth to it.

  “Don’t you want to see those fantasies realised?” Fleur asked.

  Hannah shook her head. “Reality can never live up to fantasy.” None of them understood how hard it was for her. There was a tiny part of her that wished she was brave – that wished she could move on from her assault and ask Ryan out – but her taste in men couldn’t be trusted. The moment she became emotionally involved with men, things went wrong.

  “Go on,” Kit urged.

  “I don’t date.” There was a finality about her words.

  Kit opened her mouth to say something else and Hannah cut her off. “I can’t, Kit. Not after Justin – I just can’t.”

  Kit’s eyes widened as she realised what Hannah was saying.

  Hannah couldn’t stay here, she needed to breathe. She fled the room.

  Late Tuesday afternoon as Ryan was packing up at the end of his shift, a woman walked into the station as if she owned the place. She was dressed in a white singlet, khaki shorts and steel-capped boots, and her long brown hair was tied back in a ponytail.

  “Hey, Adam, where’s Lincoln?”

  “In his office,” Adam called. “Come on through.”

  She walked into the back room, her gaze sweeping the area and she spotted Ryan, her smile warm and friendly. “You have to be Ryan. Still as good-looking as ever.”

  Ryan smiled, a little bemused, not sure who she was.

  “I’m Kit Van Ross,” she said. “I own the dairy farm next to the Zanettis.”

  He had vague recollections of the girl – she’d been a tomboy, always grubby and confident – but she was now all grown up. “Nice to see you again.”

  “Likewise.” She breezed past him into Lincoln’s office. “Slinky, we gotta talk.”

  He chuckled. Slinky? He glanced over to ask Adam about the nickname and found him staring after Kit slightly wistfully. “Friend of yours?”

  “I wish,” Adam sighed. “Kit never dates guys from town.”

  Before Ryan could ask why, Lincoln called, “Ryan, come in here.”

  He wandered in. Kit was standing with her hands on her hips, as if looking for a fight.

  “Ryan’s staying out at Hannah’s cabin,” Lincoln told Kit. “Tell him what you told me.”

  She assessed him. “Hannah’s ex is in town. It didn’t end well and I’m asking Lincoln to keep an eye on the caravan park for a couple of days.”

  “Is he a threat to her?” Ryan asked.

  “To her mental state, definitely. Physically? Possibly.”

  “Have we got a name or description?”

  Kit handed him a photo. “Justin Lodeham, aka scumbag.”

  His brown hair was slightly longer than normal and coiffed in the front, and he was wearing a hideous knitted Christmas jumper and jeans, holding a bottle of beer. He looked like your typical university student. But appearances could be deceiving. Ryan had been thoroughly fooled by Paula. “What did he do?”

  Kit frowned.

  “What did he do to make Hannah scared of him?” he clarified.

  Kit pursed her lips. “That’s classified.”

  Ryan raised an eyebrow and looked at Lincoln.

  Lincoln sighed. “I can’t make it official unless you give me something, Kit.”

  “I can’t tell you. I promised.”

  “Then get Hannah to come in.”

  Kit shook her head. “I can’t do that. She doesn’t know I’m here.”

  “She hasn’t asked for police help?” Ryan asked.

  “No. She wouldn’t. She’s too damn stubborn.”

  “Like her friends,” Lincoln muttered.

  Kit whirled around to face him. “Lincoln, you know I’d never ask you for anything unless it was serious.”

  He nodded.

  “All I’m asking is for one of your officers to drop around the caravan park once or twice a day. Show your face so that if the scumbag is around, he doesn’t get any ideas.”

  Lincoln ran a hand through his hair. “All right.” He turned to Ryan. “This next bit is unofficial. You’re staying on Hannah’s property. If you hear any cars at night, call me. I’ll come and check it out.”

  “I can keep an eye on things.” Ryan hated the idea that Hannah was feeling threatened. Was that the reason she was so scared when she was alone with him? “How far away does she live from me?”

  “About five hundred metres,” Kit answered. “Her shed is where the office will eventually be.”

  “Shed?”

  “She’s living in a converted storage shed, but for the next couple of nights she’s staying with Fleur.”

  “Good,” Lincoln said. “Keep us posted if anything changes.”

  “Will do.” She smiled then and her face lit up. “Thanks. I appreciate it.” And with that she walked out.

  Lincoln watched her go, fondness and exasperation on his face. “I can never say no to that girl.”

  “She didn’t ask for much,” Ryan said. “It won’t be hard for any of us to swing by the caravan park on our way back from something else. I’ll drop by now on my way to pick Felix up from your mum’s.”

  “Thanks, mate.”

  He’d like to check how Hannah was holding up. And find out exactly what her secret was.

  Hannah hated the nerves that clung to her skin when she arrived at work on Tuesday morning. She hated that her safe haven was now under siege. She shook her head. She was being melodramatic. Justin was only going to be in Blackbridge for a week and things would go back to normal.

  “Let’s get inside and eat these croissants.” Fleur opened the car door.

  They’d stopped by Mai’s bakery and picked up coffee and croissants, as well as a treat for morning tea. The smells made Hannah’s mouth water. She never understood how Mai was so slim when she spent her day surrounded by such amazing food.

  Hannah followed Fleur to the front door.

  “What’s this?” Fleur asked, bending down to pick up a small parcel wrapped in red-and-green Christmas paper.

  “No idea.” She unlocked the door, turned the sign to “open” and then took the box from Fleur. There was a little card with her name on it. She read out the words on the inside. “Merry Christmas, Hannah.” Unease skittered over her skin as she walked around the back of the building to let them in to the office. She couldn’t see anyone who could have left it.

  “Think you’ve got a secret admirer?” Fleur asked.

  “No.” She couldn’t imagine anyone being interested in her. Once inside, she put the box on her desk and switched on her computer. It was unsettling coming so close after Justin’s arrival. Who would be leaving her a gift? And why wouldn’t they sign it? She didn
’t want an admirer, particularly a creepy anonymous one.

  “What is it?” Fleur called from the kitchen. She walked in carrying plates with the croissants on them. She handed one to Hannah.

  “I don’t know.” She bit into her croissant as she examined the package. It was only ten centimetres square and tied with a silver bow. With a sigh, she pulled the bow apart and carefully unwrapped the paper. Inside was a plain brown box. She lifted the lid to reveal a gorgeous silver necklace with a charm of a bird in a tree.

  “That’s really pretty,” Fleur said.

  It was, but she couldn’t shake the discomfort.

  “Are you going to wear it?”

  Hannah shrugged. “What if it’s from Justin?”

  Fleur scowled. “Don’t let him ruin this for you. He only arrived yesterday and he didn’t know you were going to be here.”

  “But who else could it be from?”

  “Who cares? You’ve got a nice necklace. Want me to help you put it on?”

  She hesitated. “Not right now.” She put the lid back on and shoved it in her top drawer.

  Fleur sighed and sipped her coffee. “All right, then. What can I do to help?”

  They worked together in the office all day. It was Lynette’s turn to do the cleaning and so Hannah did paperwork, with Fleur helping her with a bit of filing. By mid-afternoon, Fleur was reading a book in the kitchen and Hannah was beginning to think she was being paranoid. Justin wasn’t here to see her – he was having a holiday with friends. It wasn’t fair of her to have Fleur cooped up in the office on her day off. Hannah needed to put on her big-girl knickers and she’d be fine. She stood to tell Fleur to go, when the doorbell chimed. She glanced up and the smile froze on her face.

  Justin.

  Her mind went completely blank, and she clutched her throat as bile rose in it. She wanted to close her eyes, pretend he wasn’t there, but it was too dangerous.

  “Hi, Hannah.” He smiled, large and open, but to her it was like a shark showing its teeth. “I wanted to check how you were feeling. I was worried about you yesterday.”

  She’d been fine until he’d arrived. Swallowing hard, she said, “I’m fine.”

  He studied her. “You’re a little pale still,” he said. “Are you feeling up for dinner tonight? It’d be great to catch up.”

  Hell no. She clutched the back of the chair. “I’m working.”

  “That’s a shame. What about tomorrow night?”

  She shook her head.

  “How about lunch?”

  Fleur walked in. “Justin. I thought I smelled something off.”

  “What’s your problem?” He seemed genuinely upset, but Hannah knew it was a game.

  “You are. Why don’t you go? We’re busy.”

  “I’m not leaving until Hannah asks me to.”

  The door opened, and Ryan walked in. Hannah’s legs went weak and she sighed in relief. “Ryan,” she greeted him. “Can I help you with something?”

  Ryan glanced at Justin and then back at Hannah. “Yeah. I wanted to discuss the break-in yesterday if you’ve got a couple of minutes.”

  “Of course.” Anything to get rid of Justin.

  Justin glowered. “I’ll catch you later, Hannah.” He walked out.

  She gasped. Was that a threat? She wrapped her hands around her waist as if she could protect herself. Before she let the fear truly take hold she took a few breaths. It was just a saying. He wouldn’t be back.

  “Was he bothering you?” Ryan asked.

  Hannah looked at Fleur. What should she say?

  “He’s her ex,” she said. “It’s nice to see you back in town, Ryan. You probably don’t remember me, I’m Fleur.” She shook his hand.

  Hannah loosened her hold. “Sorry, I should have introduced you.” She turned to Ryan. “Did you want to come around the back?”

  He hesitated. “No, it’s fine. I don’t actually have anything to report.”

  She frowned. “Then why did you say that you did?”

  He ran a hand through his hair. “Well, Kit asked us to keep an eye on the park for a couple of days, said your ex was in town.”

  Hannah stilled. She didn’t want Lincoln knowing. He wouldn’t understand.

  “What exactly did she say?” Fleur asked.

  “That Justin wasn’t very nice and it would be reassuring to have a police presence around while he was here. She gave us a picture of him.”

  It might be enough for Ryan, but Lincoln was going to want to know more. He would keep at her until she told him everything, until she confessed her shame. She squeezed her eyes shut. Damn Kit. Hannah knew her friend was doing what she thought was best, but Hannah didn’t need Lincoln’s questions. She opened her eyes and forced a smile for Ryan. “Thanks for dropping by.”

  Lynette walked into the office from the back door. “Hi, Ryan. I was going to call you. Jacob’s third-grade class is having a Christmas wind-up Thursday afternoon and I thought you could bring Felix and introduce him to his classmates.”

  Ryan’s smile was big and genuine and Hannah’s breath caught in her throat. “That would be great, Lynette. What time?”

  “From midday at the park by the river. They’re having a barbecue, games, and make sure he brings his bathers because they’ll probably swim too.”

  “I’ll let Mrs Z know. It’ll be good for him to meet some kids his age.”

  “No problem. If you tell her to bring him around here tomorrow after three, he can meet Jacob.”

  “Thanks, I’ll do that.”

  Lynette turned to Hannah. “The cleaning is done and the plants have been watered. Anything else you need me to do?”

  “No. Why don’t you head off? I know you had some Christmas shopping you wanted to do.”

  “That would be wonderful. Thanks.” She waved at the others. “I’ll see you later.”

  “I’d better get going as well,” Ryan said. “I’ve got to pick up Felix.”

  When the door was shut Fleur fanned herself. “That was Ryan Kilpatrick? He just got better with age, and he was fine to begin with.”

  Hannah busied herself with tidying up the desk.

  “Hannah?”

  She cleared her throat. “Yeah, I mentioned last night that he’s good-looking.”

  Fleur put a hand on her arm and raised both eyebrows. “Honey, what happened to you was horrible, but you can’t let it stop you from moving on with your life. Not all guys are like Justin and your dad. There are good men out there: my dad, Lincoln, Jamie, your granddad.”

  The idea of going on a date, being alone with a man in that way, made her feel ill. She wished things were different, wished she could be like other women and date. She shook her head. “Rationally I know that, Fleur, but emotionally …” She held up a hand. “I can’t go there.”

  Fleur sighed. “There are some good counsellors up at the hospital. Think about it.” She smiled. “In the meantime, it’s not going to hurt to look at some eye candy like that.”

  Hannah grinned, relieved she’d dropped the subject. “You’re right.”

  Ryan was very easy on the eye and perhaps she could let her imagination run away with her.

  It didn’t mean she was going to act on it.

  Chapter 4

  Ryan drove out to the Zanetti farm, his thoughts on Hannah and what he’d interrupted. Seeing Hannah’s fear of Justin had Ryan’s protective instinct kicking into gear, and he’d lied about needing to speak to her, something that definitely wasn’t appropriate while he was in uniform.

  Perhaps, his empathy was too strong because he’d seen his fair share of domestic abuse cases while working up north. Been on the receiving end more than a few times as well, and the feelings of helplessness, confusion and fear weren’t ones he was going to forget anytime soon. He wanted to hear Hannah’s story, wanted to help her.

  Ryan sighed. Only two days in town and he was already involved in the community. He’d forgotten that was what being in a small town was like.

>   Turning off the main highway, he drove along the dirt road that led to the farmhouse. He slowed the car as he came to a junction lined with half a dozen letterboxes, then turned and headed along the road to where he used to live. The properties out here were all five to ten acres in size, and a mixture of hobby farms and single residences. Peppermint trees grew close to the road, hiding the buildings from view, making them even more secluded and secret.

  He pulled up in front of a driveway. Through the trees was a large stone house with gardens, both functional vegetable patches and beautiful clumps of roses in bloom. There was no remnant of the composting toilet, or the rusted urn they’d used to heat the water for their outdoor shower.

  When he’d lived here, there’d been no house, and all the garden beds had been functional. It was here he’d realised that his parents hadn’t owned the property. They weren’t even renting, they were squatting, living in their caravan until someone realised and came to kick them off the land. It was why they’d moved so regularly at a moment’s notice all through his childhood.

  Sadness squeezed his chest. It was here – with Lincoln’s help – he’d realised life didn’t have to be the way his parents lived, that parents were supposed to care for their children instead of leaving them to their own devices, that having a little bit of money didn’t mean you’d sold your soul to the devil.

  It was here he’d decided he wanted more out of life.

  And being so clueless as to what normal life was like had led him straight into the problems with Paula.

  He sighed and did a U-turn. He was starting over – again – but this time he was going to do it right.

  As he took the driveway into the Zanettis’ property, he waved to Mr Z, who was walking from the cheese factory to the shop. The house came into view and Felix was playing on the swing set up under a peppermint tree. Felix waved at him and leapt off the swing. By the time Ryan had come to a complete stop, Felix was by the car.

  “Hi, Dad!”

  Felix’s enthusiasm always cheered him up, always made him feel as if he was important. “Hey. How was your day?”

  “Awesome! Mr Z showed me how to make cream and then Mrs Z taught me how to bake a cake and we topped it with fresh cream that came from the cows next door.” His eyes were wide as if he could hardly believe it.