To Protect and Serve

by Pat Adeff

  While Doug mulled over these thoughts, Bill, Patty and the boys went about dinner as though Doug was an active participant.

  When Doug finally left for the evening, Patty handed him a bag of leftovers to take home.

  She kissed him on the cheek and whispered, “Doug, don’t make a mistake with Nancy. At least have dinner with her.”

  Doug kissed her back and thanked her for the great dinner. He shook Bill’s hand and gave a playful punch on the arms of both the boys, trying to appear himself.

  Except, the sad fact was that “himself” was now an empty shell. He really didn’t know what he was going to do.

  …………………

  “If someone doesn’t do something about this, I’m going to go crazy!” Jackson was pacing around the kitchen.

  Kate and Christy were putting away groceries.

  “Okay. Tell us what to do and we’ll do it!” Kate replied with a snap in her voice.

  “Hey! Don’t get angry at Jackson! It’s not his fault!” Christy was instantly defensive.

  Reluctantly Kate walked over to Jackson and gave him a hug. “I’m sorry, Bro. This is just a really bad situation and it’s got me on edge.”

  Jackson patted her on the back. “It’s okay. I understand.” Christy smiled at Jackson.

  “So what DO we do?” Christy put the ice cream into the freezer next to the frozen veggies.

  “I already talked with Mom and she’d adamant about not calling the police station again. I told her that she’d only called once and just maybe Doug hadn’t gotten the call. But she insisted that he wasn’t really interested in her and at least she’d have her pride.” Kate explained.

  “Yeah, but pride won’t keep you warm on a cold night.” Jackson just shook his head.

  Just then Kate’s cell phone rang. She pulled it out of her front pocket and looked at who was calling. You’d think that she’d just been told she’d won the lottery! She jumped once, grinned from ear to ear and leaving the room said “Catch you guys later!” Then softly, “Hello?”

  Jackson looked at Christy with eyebrows raised in question.

  Christy looked back at him with a negative shake of her head indicating that she had no idea who was on the phone. “I don’t think it was Robert, though. She dumped him a couple of days ago.”

  “Really? What stupid move did this one make?” Jackson enjoyed watching Kate go through boyfriends. It always made him feel even better about his relationship with Christy.

  “I believe he was critical of his parents.” Christy grinned back at Jackson. “Or, it could have been that he sided with the oppressors of any third world country, or he stated that he didn’t think there was anything wrong with hunting small animals for sport. Take your pick.”

  “Babe, tell me again that we’re never going to split-up.” Jackson held Christy lightly in his arms.

  “Babe, we’re never going to split-up.” Christy smiled sweetly.

  “Unless you do something really stupid.” Christy teased him.

  Jackson tightened his arms. “Don’t EVER kid about that. I mean it.”

  Christy could see just how much this had affected Jackson.

  “Don’t worry, babe. Never again. You are my guy forever.”

  “Damn right.” Jackson hugged her hard.

  CHAPTER 26

  “Doug! Someone is here to speak with you.”

  The desk officer called down the hall to Doug, where he’d been filling out the endless pile of paperwork from that weekend. It seemed that the weekend just before Christmas was always the busiest.

  Doug had thought that the paperwork would have gotten less with the department having moved into the computer age. However, it seemed like there were now more forms than ever! Doug loved police work. He just wasn’t a big fan of the paper chase. Which was the reason he was still a cop with a beat. Several years back when he’d been promoted to a desk job, he’d suffered through it for one year, finally took the pay cut and went back to the streets.

  Doug finished the sentence he’d been writing, stood up and went to the front desk area.

  And stopped.

  Standing there were Kate, Christy and Jackson. All three had their arms folded across their chests and were not smiling.

  “Hi, there!” Doug stood on the other side of the half-wall and waited for one of them to speak.

  “What exactly were your intentions regarding Mom?” Christy was the first to speak up and it was not in a friendly tone of voice.

  “Yeah. Why haven’t you called her?” Kate’s tone was not any better.

  “Did you just get what you wanted and then dumped her?” Jackson spoke up, too.

  By this time, there was a small group of smiling officers paying attention to the conversation, and Doug was not about to answer any of these questions with an audience.

  “Would you guys like to go get a cup of coffee with me and we’ll talk?” Doug had the desk officer buzz him through to the police station lobby area and he closed the door behind him, so it was just the kids and him.

  Kate and Christy looked at each other. Christy looked at Jackson, and all three looked at Doug.

  “Okay. You’re buying.” Kate answered.

  “Of course. Let’s go to the cafe next door.” Doug led them out of the police station and they walked the half-block to the small cafe in silence.

  They found an empty booth and ordered coffee. Christy and Jackson sat on one side of the booth, and Kate begrudgingly sat on the other side next to Doug. She seemed to be perched on just three inches at the end of the booth.

  Doug indicated she could scoot closer, but Kate just shook her head “no” as though he had cooties or something.

  Christy was the first one to speak up.

  “You made Mom cry.”

  With that declaration, she’d put the ball into Doug’s court. All three of the kids sat there looking at him like he was some kind of bug that needed to be stepped on.

  “I don’t think you understand what you’re talking about,” Doug replied.

  “That’s a load of bull.” Jackson was actually angry.

  “We know exactly what we’re talking about.” Kate was trying to stay level-headed, but Doug could hear the hurt and anger under her calm demeanor. “First Dad hurts her, then you do. Why don’t you want to be with her anymore?”

  Doug was stunned into silence for a moment. Not want to be with her?! He’d give anything if she’d ask him back.

  “See? You don’t care!” Christy was vehement.

  “She doesn’t want me.” Doug wasn’t sure if he gave voice to his thought or if Kate could read minds.

  “She thinks you don’t want HER!” Kate had just about had enough of dense men. “Why did you stop seeing her?” Doug thought to himself that if she wanted, Kate could have a successful career as a police investigator. He’d seen the same look that was in her eyes in some of the force’s best cops.

  “This is going to sound lame.” Doug figured things couldn’t get any worse, so he decided to bare his soul.

  “Try us.” Christy’s tone left Doug in no doubt that whatever came out of his mouth next needed to be really, REALLY good.

  “I got so involved in Andy’s legal case and trying to make amends to him and Sue that by the time I came up for air, it was really awkward to call Nancy. Since she hadn’t tried to reach me, I figured she was no longer interested.”

  “What do you mean? She called and left a message for you several weeks ago!” Jackson wasn’t buying it yet.

  Doug was puzzled. “When did she call? I never got any message. I swear it!”

  Kate took pity on him. “I believe you.” She looked at Christy and Jackson. “I tried to get her to call again, but she said that he’d call her if he wanted to.”

  “You mean she’s been waiting for me to call her?”

  “Look. We understand that this is a modern society and women call men all the time, but Mom is basically an old-fashioned girl at heart. You need to pursue h
er, not the other way around.” Now Jackson was giving Doug dating tips.

  “That’s exactly what Patty said.” Doug thought out loud to himself.

  “Who’s Patty?” Christy was once again on the offense.

  “My best friend’s wife. The two of them have practically written me off. Patty told me that I should just call Nancy, but I didn’t believe her.” Doug looked back at the comedy of errors that had been building between Nancy and himself. He shook his head slowly back and forth.

  They sat there waiting for his next move.

  Doug finally pulled himself from his thoughts and looked expectantly at the kids. “Is it too late?”

  They looked back at him as slow smiles started to cover their faces.

  Kate added, “And if you can follow directions, there’s even a very nice Christmas gift for you.”

  ***************

  Nancy had just pulled the turkey from the oven for Christmas Eve dinner. Both her girls would be there any minute, along with Jackson. She knew that she should be grateful for her wonderful family and she was. However, she’d lost her sense of enthusiasm and was sort of

  moving along day to day. She missed Doug horribly, but understood that it was better for him to be back with Sue and his son, Andy. That’s what a family was supposed to be. Together.

  There was a knock at the front door.

  “Just a minute!” Nancy shouted to whoever was at the door. She wiped her hands dry with the kitchen towel and opened the door.

  Then she just stared.

  Broad navy-blue shoulders filled her field of vision.

  Mirrored sunglasses glinted in the sunlight.

  The badge flashed as he reached up to pull off the sunglasses.

  Familiar dark blue, almost black eyes met hers before cutting to Nancy’s right hand where the kitchen towel had once again slipped from her fingers and fallen to the ground.

  Nancy pulled herself out of the spell she’d fallen under and reached down for the towel at the same time Doug reached for it. They ended up

  bumping shoulders. Nancy started to fall sideways but was stopped when she felt strong his strong warm hands grab her shoulders and help her stand upright.

  They stood there like that, staring into each other’s eyes. The hurt and the longing were almost unbearable.

  Doug pulled his hands from Nancy’s shoulders.

  “May I come in? Please?”

  Nancy stared at Doug. Her heart was beating a hundred miles a minute. Could he hear it?

  “Of course. Come on in.” She stood back while he filled the entry hall and once again took all the oxygen.

  Nancy moved into the kitchen and tried to breathe. “Would you like some coffee?”

  “Coffee sounds great.” Doug kept watching her, waiting for a sign of some sort.

  Nancy poured two cups from the freshly brewed pot and placed one of them at the end of the kitchen table and one of them at the seat to the right.

  Doug put his cap on the other end of the table and sat down. Nancy sat down next to him. They both sipped from their cups, looking over the rims at each other, drinking in each other’s face.

  Doug cleared his throat and launched into the speech he’d rehearsed over and over as though his life depended on it. In fact, it did. “Nancy, you deserved better than this from me.”

  She really didn’t want to hear what she was afraid he was going to say and interrupted him. “It’s okay, Doug. I understand. Families should be together.” It sounded right. Too bad the words made her heart hurt enough to crack in two.

  “I’m sorry I didn’t call sooner. Once the trial was over, it was so awkward for me and I wasn’t sure you’d want to hear from me again.” Doug wished with all his heart that he could find the magic words that would bring Nancy back into his life.

  There was a pause, as they both sipped on the coffee that neither of them was tasting.

  “So, are you and Sue going to get married now?” Nancy grimaced. She’d sworn to herself that she wasn’t going to ask that question.

  “What?” Doug could see where Nancy’s thoughts had erroneously gone to. “Of course not. Sue and I are just friends. Don’t misunderstand me. It’s good to have her friendship back. But it’s not like that. We’ve come to an understanding as Andy’s parents and she

  has forgiven me for not doing my job as a dad.” Doug waited several seconds for a reply from Nancy.

  When none came, he quietly asked “Can you ever forgive me?”

  Nancy thought her throat would never open up enough for her to say the words. “I thought you’d gone back to Sue.” Then the tears started. She hated when she cried like that.

  The tears were Doug’s undoing. “Aw, Nancy. Don’t cry. Please don’t cry.” He reached for her but Nancy pushed him away.

  She rushed to her feet as weeks of torment bubbled to the surface and burst out of her. “You jerk!” Nancy swiped at her tears and couldn’t have stopped what she was spouting, even if you’d offered her a million bucks. “Do you have any idea how awful it’s been for me? I finally open up to someone – YOU – and I get dumped! It’s humiliating and degrading. I’ve never felt this badly about myself EVER! I was better off before you entered my life. It HURTS loving you!”

  Doug just sat there dumbfounded. Out of all that verbiage, he was pinning his hope on that last sentence. She loved him! A slow grin spread across his face.

  Nancy couldn’t believe what she was seeing. Doug thought this was funny! Oh, it made her FURIOUS! “Get out! Leave here now!” She strode to the door and had it already open by the time Doug reached her.

  He slowly put his hand on the door and shut it. Then he moved closer to Nancy, inches from her. She could feel the heat radiating from him. He made her knees weak, but she was NOT going to give into her attraction to him. Not now. She needed to hang onto the last shred of self-preservation she had.

  Doug’s voice was low and gravely. “Do you have any idea what I’VE been through? Do you?” He put his hand under her chin and raised her face, so she’d look at him. “You’ve made me into a man I don’t recognize. I’m no longer relaxed and carefree. I spend inordinate amounts of my day thinking about you. Missing you. Wanting you. I drive past your house and school dozens of times a week, wondering what you’re doing. I’ve called myself all kinds of a fool. But guess what?”

  When Nancy didn’t say anything, he nudged her chin up a tiny bit more, so she’d have to look straight into his eyes.

  He repeated his question. “Guess what?”

  Nancy was finally able to say something past the lump in her throat. “What?” As the word whispered out of her mouth it also unleashed more tears. God, she hated it when she cried!

  “I realized I would rather be a fool with you, than be my old self without you. Nancy, I love you. I know you love me. I want us to make this work.”

  When she just stood there silently staring at him, he took a deep breath and gave it everything he had in him.

  “I need you in my life. When I’m with you, I feel like I can conquer the world. Without you, I’m lost. I …”

  Nancy felt her soul come back to life. Doug wanted her! She put her fingertips on his lips.

  “Just kiss me,” she whispered.

  Doug smiled and slowly placed kisses across her brow, across her face and finally on her lips. He whispered against her mouth, “Don’t cry. I’m so sorry. Please forgive me. I can’t live without you. I need you.”

  Then he claimed her mouth fully. His lips seeking forgiveness and redemption.

  Nancy felt like a bright light had started to shine in her heart and was threatening to burst out of her chest. He needed her as much as she needed him!

  “Oh, Doug! I thought you didn’t want me anymore. I thought you were through with me. My life felt over.” She said, speaking against his mouth between kisses.

  Doug pulled back and gently cupped Nancy’s precious face between his hands.

  “Darling, I’ll love you and need you u
ntil the day I die. Will you put up with me even when I’m old and grumpy? Can you possibly love me even a fraction of how much I love you?”

  Nancy’s eyes filled with happy tears this time as she smiled. “I’ll love you forever, even when you’re old and grumpy. I’ll love you until I die.”

  Doug looked deep into Nancy’s eyes and recognized what he’d been looking for his whole life. As his mouth slowly lowered to hers again, he vowed to protect and serve her for the rest of his life.

  Sometime during the kiss, Doug became aware of the kitchen filling with people. He and Nancy broke apart and smiled sheepishly at Kate, Christy and Jackson standing here, once again grinning like the village idiots.

  “So, are you guys going to behave like grown-ups now, or what?” Christy was unable to make her statement sound anything other than pleased.

  While Nancy untangled herself from Doug’s embrace with as much dignity as she could muster, she started to lodge a protest with Christy’s mouthy comment, but stopped when she realized Christy was totally

  right! It was a little mortifying to realize that she HAD been acting like a moonstruck teenager, instead of a mature mother of two.

  “Alright, everyone. Help me get dinner on the table. Then we’ll talk.”

  Cheerful chatter filled the kitchen while everyone followed Nancy’s orders, and soon the table was laden with turkey, mashed potatoes, gravy, buttered baby peas, sweet potato casserole, warm Italian bread rolls with butter and honey, with a pumpkin pie resting on the counter for dessert.

  They all stood around the table holding hands for grace and one for one looked towards Doug.

  “Me?” They all nodded ‘yes.’

  Doug didn’t think he would be able to handle any more emotion. He remembered a prayer his father used to say at special occasions just like this.

  He bowed his head and the others followed his lead. While Nancy, Kate, Christy and Jackson held hands around the table, Doug repeated the prayer. When they were done he looked up to find Nancy’s eyes shining at him. He felt as though he’d just been accepted into this wonderful family completely.