The Journey To Become The Perfect Werewolf

by Olive P. Farley

  The first thing I noticed was that he seemed concerned. I knew he was concerned about me. I smiled up at him, wanting him to know I was okay.

  “So, penny for your thoughts.” I said to him, reaching up to touch his curls.

  “I love you, Carrie. I will love our child and I know you'll be an amazing Mother.” He said. I looked at him and thought of my vision again. It was funny. Even though the quick flash of a vision couldn't have lasted more than a second or two, I had felt my love for this child. It had been strong. A love like I had never felt before. Now I felt almost a sense of loss now that it was over but I reminded myself that the child inside me was one and the same.

  I was going to be a Mother.

  I started to laugh. I was going to be a Mother. I giggled for a moment, unable to stop myself. Gabriel let go of me and watched curiously.

  I laughed for a moment before my laughter shifted and I started to cry. Gabriel started to pull me close again.

  “Carrie, it's going to be okay!” He said. I looked up at him again as another tear slipped down my face.

  “I know it's going to be okay. I just have so many emotions. I'm happy. I want our baby. I'm also worried. So worried. This baby will change everything.” I said to him. I did want this baby. I knew that now. But if I said I wasn't scared, I would be lying.

  “You don't think I'm terrified too!? But I love you and I know we will love this baby.” Gabriel said, kissing me on my neck. I shivered. I sniffled, starting to feel embarrassed by my reaction. I didn't want anyone thinking I wasn't happy about the baby or that I didn't want it. The fact was, I had never considered it. Sure, I obviously knew that sex generally led to children, I just didn't consider the possibility until it was staring me in the face. Panic had definitely been my first response. I groaned out loud.

  “You okay?” Gabriel asked.

  “Yes, no. Now I'm worried your family is going to think I'm some awful baby hating monster because I freaked out earlier.” I blurted. Gabriel burst out laughing.

  Chapter 52

  Gabriel laughed at me for a few minutes. It only took a moment before I was laughing too. I swatted him lightly for laughing at me and he caught my hand in his and brought it to his lips, kissing it softly. I suddenly wanted Gabriel's lips all over me and without thinking, I let that desire crossover the mind link. I saw Gabriel's eyes darken for a second but he quickly regained control.

  “Carrie, we are in a hospital…” He scolded me mischievously. I blushed.

  “I know. Just because I want you doesn't mean I'm some kind of animal.” I joked. Gabriel kissed me on the cheek. “How am I supposed to control myself if you keep kissing me?” I asked him. He chuckled and pulled away.

  “Well, today has been….. eventful.” He smirked and I smiled. Eventful was a massive understatement. All in one day, I got engaged and found out I'm pregnant. I took a deep breath.

  Suzie knocked on the door. I realized that I had been so consumed with my big news that I hadn't even noticed when she slipped out of the room.

  “Carrie, Gabriel, since we don't know the exact date of conception, it might be a good idea to do an ultrasound. You will also need to start taking prenatal vitamins immediately.” Suzie said. I looked at Gabriel and he nodded.

  “Ultrasound sounds good. Do we do it here or in another room.” Gabriel asked Suzie.

  “We have a room on the end for ultrasounds.” She replied.

  “You don't mind me coming, do you? He asked me.

  “No, of course not. It's your baby too.” I told him. We got up and followed Suzie over to another room. She told me to strip from the waist down and then I had to put a blanket over my lap. She came back in a moment later and started.

  “Okay, since we aren't sure where you are in the pregnancy, we are going to do a vaginal ultrasound.” She explained. “Just relax.” She added. Easy for her to say.

  I was uncomfortable at first but then I saw the screen and forgot about the rest. There, clear as day, was my baby. It was small and alien like, but there was no denying the baby on the screen. She moved the device slightly and I saw this little flapping movement. I realized it was the baby's heart rate. Suzie hit a button and we heard this fast thumping sound. Their heartbeat. My eyes welled with tears. This was my baby. This little life inside me. I felt Gabriel squeeze my hand and I looked up at him. I saw his eyes were also full of tears and he was doing his best to hold them back. I laughed, not because it was funny but because it was cute. We were both so happy. A tear slipped down his cheek and I reached up and wiped it off with my thumb. Gabriel smiled and we both turned back to Suzie.

  “So, based on the ultrasound, I would say you are about 5 weeks along.” Suzie said. I smiled, glad I was still early in the pregnancy.

  “The baby looks good. About 10 more weeks and we should be able to tell the sex, if you wanna know of course.” I tried to think of what I wanted. A boy or girl. It didn't really matter. I just wanted a healthy baby and prayed I could be a decent Mother.

  Suzie finished the exam. She gave me a bunch of prenatal vitamin samples so I could start taking them right away. She left the room and I quickly cleaned up and got dressed. Gabriel and I walked out of the room and he took my hand.

  “Well, what now?” I said.

  “ Would you mind if we told my family?” He asked.

  “Why not? I think they kinda know already.” I said to him. We walked back to Lauren's room and knocked. I could feel the excitement the moment we walked in. Gabriel's Mom looked like she was basically vibrating. She was bouncing up and down.

  “So…? Am I getting another grandbaby?” She asked.

  “Yes! Carrie is pregnant.” Gabriel confirmed and the room erupted into cheers and congratulations. Debra started crying and went and hugged Gabriel tight. He laughed but I could see he wanted to get away from the smothering hug. Lucky for him, she quickly made her way over to me.

  “Oh, wonderful girl. I am so happy that Gabriel, that all of us, have you! We will need to get to know each other better before the baby comes.” She said before giving me a crushing hug.

  “Yes, of course. I would love that!” I told her. I walked over to Lauren.

  “Congratulations! I'm so happy for you and Gabriel. It's so great that the twins will be so close in age with their cousins.” She said, absentmindedly caressing her belly. I glanced at her large pregnant belly and felt relieved I wasn't having twins. She already looked huge and she wasn't even full term yet.

  “It all seems so surreal still. I'm still trying to wrap my mind around it all.” I started. “But I am very happy.” I quickly added. They chuckled.

  “Making sure they don't think you're a baby hating monster?” Gabriel jokingly asked me through our mind link. I stuck my tongue out at him. I blushed when his Dad saw and teasingly acted as if it had been meant for him. I giggled and turned my attention back to Lauren and Debra.

  We visited for a tiny bit longer before we decided to head home. When we got home, I went right to bed. I was exhausted and felt like I could sleep for days. I stripped off my clothes and put on the warmest sweater of Gabriel's I could find and snuggled deep into the bed. Gabriel came in a while later and cuddled close to me. I sighed and quickly drifted back off to sleep.

  Chapter 53

  I had crazy dreams that night. It started with dreams of my birth mother. She was sitting in a rocking chair holding me. I could see the golden hair on my head. I couldn't have been more than a few months old. She had brown hair but when the sunlight shone on her, it highlighted the gold undertone. She was rocking me, singing a song as I slept peacefully in her arms. She looked down at me and smiled before looking out the window. I could see the pain in her eyes as she stared longingly out the window. A single tear slipped down her face and I saw her mouth move as a name was whispered.

  “Patrick.”

  I jolted awake. I felt hot and uncomfortable. I got up and went to the bathroom. My stomach was doing backflips. I splashed some cool water on my
face and took some deep breaths. It helped, but only a little. A moment later I was getting sick. I sat on the floor for a moment, waiting to make sure I was done. When I was sure my uneasy stomach was settled, I got up and washed my face and brushed my teeth. I went and drank some water before laying back down. I immediately fell asleep and a new dream started.

  The second dream was about a woman I didn't know. She had long curly black hair and bright blue eyes. Her skin was tan and she was stunning. She was outside somewhere and it seemed as if she was speaking with someone but the voices were muffled and I couldn't make out anything they were saying. I saw a man come to her. He was very tall with jet black hair that was straight and cut short. He had golden eyes that seemed so familiar to me. He took the woman in his arms and kissed her deeply and she sighed. They both sat down and she settled herself between his legs and he held her against his chest as they watched the sunset. I looked at the view and realized they were at Gabriel's spot, the overlook. I woke briefly but quickly fell back asleep. When I woke up in the morning, I felt horrible. I felt as if I hadn't slept at all, which I knew wasn't true. I felt nauseous and starving all at once.

  I walked to the kitchen planning on making some toast and drinking some water but found Gabriel there already. I walked in and realized he was making breakfast. A stack of pancakes was already on the table and he was in the process of frying bacon. I was touched that he was making me breakfast. He was such a sweet man. However, once the smell of the cooking bacon hit my nose, all thoughts of gratitude were expelled from my head. What used to be a wonderful and enticing smell, the smell of cooking bacon, had morphed into something else entirely. The smell was repugnant. I ran to the sink as I started to gag uncontrollably. I threw up a little but since I had already been sick during the night, there wasn't much of anything in my stomach. I started to dry heave and I realized I needed to get out of the kitchen.

  The bacon smell was overwhelming my senses and I fled from the room, racing down the hall. I decided to go to the pink rooms bathroom, wanting some privacy. Gabriel didn't need to see this. I dry heaved for another few minutes before it finally stopped. Sweat was beaded across my forehead and I sat on the floor and groaned. So far, pregnancy sucked. I had never thrown up so much in my life. Gabriel came to check on me.

  ”Are you okay?” He asked. I nodded and smiled weakly. I wanted to say no, I felt like death, but I didn't want to complain. I knew women got sick when they were pregnant. This was just part of the process. I just hadn't realized it would feel this awful. Gabriel helped me up and I gasped as he picked me up and took me back into our room. He laid me down on the bed and I protested but Gabriel quickly silenced me.

  “Please just let me take care of you.” He said. I smiled.

  “Trying to spoil me?” I asked.

  “Trying.” He started. “You don't make it easy.” He said. I giggled.

  “Sorry.” I mumbled.

  “Nothing to be sorry for. Now, what would you like?”

  “Toast?” I said. Gabriel looked worried.

  “No pancakes or bacon?” He asked hopefully. I nearly gagged just at the mention of bacon.

  “No. Not yet at least. Just toast. I will eat more once my stomach settles.” I promised. A few minutes later Gabriel returned carrying a tray with buttered toast and some hot tea. He set it down in front of me on the bed and I took a bite out of the toast and sniffed at the tea.

  I was surprised by the peppery smell of the tea and looked to Gabriel.

  “My mom ran over some ginger tea this morning. She said it would help with the morning sickness.” Gabriel explained. I looked at the cup of tea skeptically. I decided to try and drink some. Gabriel's Mom had two kids. She might be right. I sipped at the spicy tea. It had a tiny bit of sweetness that I suspected was honey. I took a few more drinks and was pleasantly surprised when the nausea lessened.

  “It's good. Thank you. I will have to thank your Mother.” I told him. I laid there for a bit and kept sipping on the tea. After about half an hour the nausea was nearly gone. I grabbed my phone and googled pregnancy.

  I quickly realized there was a mile long list of things I was no longer allowed to do. When I read that hot tubs or overly hot baths were off limits, I got annoyed. I had planned to get a bath after I finished my little research project. I sulked over to the bathroom and ran myself a lukewarm bath. As I sat down I made a face of distaste. I loved my hot baths. I had planned to soak for a while but I felt too resentful towards the merely warm water to really enjoy myself. In the end, I washed up quickly and got out of the tub feeling entirely unsatisfied. I put on some comfortable clothes. A pair of black yoga pants and a light gray sweater. I brushed my hair and headed out to the living room to see what Gabriel was up to.

  When I walked into the living room I found Jon and Gabriel having a conversation. I felt annoyed that Gabriel hadn't told me that Jon was here but quickly shook it off.

  “Gabe told me the big news! Congratulations!” Jon said. I felt my face get warm as I blushed.

  “Thanks.” I said awkwardly.

  “Gabe was explaining that you wouldn't be able to patrol now.” Jon added.

  “Oh, did he?” I questioned, narrowing my eyes at Gabriel.

  “Decided that all by yourself, did you?” I said to Gabriel, looking him right in the eyes. I felt both men grow uncomfortable as I waited for an answer.

  Chapter 54

  I stood there glaring at Gabriel. How dare he decide such a thing without even talking to me. I was fuming mad.

  “Carrie, I….the baby and I….I just assumed. I mean, the baby.” He stammered nervously.

  “Yes, I know I'm pregnant. Pregnant. Not disabled. I don't need you deciding what I will and won't do.” I said to Gabriel. I knew I was being harsh but I was so mad, I didn't care.

  “Carrie, patrolling can be dangerous. Gabriel's not wrong. We don't usually let pregnant wolves help patrol.” Jon said. I turned my glare onto him.

  “So, it's not dangerous for non-pregnant pack members?” I asked him. Part of me knew I was being slightly irrational but I couldn't seem to help myself. How dare they decide for me, just because I was pregnant!

  “No, but there's no need to put a child's life at risk.” Jon shot back, clearly disapproving my attitude. I felt a little ashamed at that point. While I was sure I would be able to protect myself, there was some risk. It would be careless of me to not think of the baby.

  “This is still something that could have been discussed with me, rather than just assuming and deciding without me.” I insisted. Gabriel stood up.

  “You're right. I'm sorry.” He said. I looked at him wanting to be mad but he seemed so sincere, I decided to just let it go.

  “Did Gabriel tell you the other news?” I asked Jon.

  “You mean the engagement?” Jon asked. “Congrats on that too, by the way.” He added.

  “Thanks, but no, that's not what I was talking about. I found some information about my birth parents.” I told him.

  “Oh, really? That's great. What did you find out?” Jon asked.

  “Not a lot.” Gabriel answered.

  “My Mother was human.” I said. A weird look quickly passed over Jon's face but was gone so quickly, I wasn't sure I saw it. “My father was obviously a wolf but the only thing they knew was his name, Patrick.” I finished.

  “Hmmm.” Jon said. “ I will ask the elders. Maybe we can ask around but with only a first name, it will be difficult. Also, I am leaving next week to visit a neighboring pack so I will still need Gabe to patrol while I am gone.” Jon finished. I was still annoyed but I kept my mouth shut about it. I decided to go just lay down in our room while Gabriel and Jon visited for a while longer.

  I wasn't sure how long I laid there. I hadn't intended to fall asleep. At first I just laid there daydreaming about a little boy with golden curls. I don't know why but I always imagined a boy. It was starting to make me think the baby was a boy and I was trying to come up with names. While brainst
orming, I must have dozed off because next thing I knew Gabriel was snuggling up behind me.

  “Jon left a few minutes ago.” He said, as he started to kiss my neck.

  “I didn't know Jon was going out of town.” I noted.

  “I don't want to talk about Jon right now.” Gabriel said, kissing my neck where his mark was. I shuddered.

  “Do you think he's still looking for his mate?” I asked, remembering that Gabriel had told me that he and Jon had visited other packs in search of theirs.

  “Maybe. We haven't visited this pack before. I think he always hopes he will find her but I think he's starting to lose hope.” Gabriel told me. I felt bad for Jon. Despite our rough start, I really liked Jon. He was a nice guy and Gabriel's best friend. It was sad that he wanted a mate so badly but had never found her.

  “Poor Jon. I hope he finds his mate soon.” I said sadly.

  “Me too.” Gabriel said. “Now, to more enjoyable activities.” He finished. He turned me onto my back and claimed my lips with his own. He kissed me passionately and I sighed as he moved down, kissing my neck. He moved back up, taking my lips again. My lips parted and his tongue started to caress mine. I moaned as his hand moved down and he started to rub me through my pants. He took my shirt off and started to trail kisses down my chest. He caressed my belly with his hand and something caught his attention. He stopped kissing me, obviously distracted. I fought the urge to pout. He caressed my belly again.

  “I think you're starting to show.” He said. I looked down. My tummy did have the slightest roundness to it. I thought I looked more bloated than anything but my stomach was definitely not as perfectly flat as it had been. To someone who didn't know, they would never guess that the slight swell was pregnancy.

  “Maybe a tiny bit.” I conceded. Gabriel kissed my belly and I felt my heart swell in my chest.

  “Hello, baby.” He said. I giggled but was fighting the urge to get emotional.