Always a Kicker

by Jeff Zwagerman

  He left the Branchwater and headed for the cabin. He felt bad leaving on a Saturday but the end of August was extremely slow. Vacationers had given up on the summer and schools had started. It would be at least two months before they could count on the skiers coming to the runs. So his being here wasn’t all that important. In fact, there were days he didn’t do enough to earn his pay.

  He had decided to go part way to Omaha yet that evening since it would be all of eight hours of driving time. There were a few rest areas on I-80 where he could pull off and get a few hours of sleep before he moved on.

  Zander exchanged the T-Bird with the van in the shed and drove it to the front of the cabin. He packed a small duffle with the things he needed for a few days and threw in some extra underwear just in case. He changed his jeans from his tight skinny cuts to his boot cuts. Zander didn’t like cowboy boots but he did wear side zipper boots. They were his “Beatle Boots” like the Fab Four wore back in the day. In the left boot he kept a nine-inch blue pearl handled switch- blade. He had to flash it a few times over the years but that usually took care of any problem that someone might want to cause. He carried the knife at all times and he had become so used to it in his boot that when it wasn’t there it just didn’t feel right. He even thought he walked off balance when it didn’t have it. When he went on a job, he put a stun gun called a Thunder Shot in his right boot. It was at little longer than the closed knife but it was quite a bit thicker and it was just a little uncomfortable in his boot. It had come in handy a few times and it didn’t seem to cause any lasting harm. That was important to Zander. If he zapped someone for three to five seconds, it caused loss of balance and muscle control and total mental confusion causing disorientation leaving the subject dazed. But they always recovered. At least they always had in the past.

  Zander looked around the cabin to make sure he didn’t forget anything. He traveled light like the way he lived so it didn’t take long to get his things in order. The last thing he did was to go through a stack of magnetic signs he used on various jobs to make the van become unnoticeable. He settled on the signs that said Beany’s Pest Control. He had two for the doors and two for both sides of the back panels. Zander avoided familiar and national chain signs because they could be traced easily. He liked the odd names he came up with because no one would think twice that someone would name a company with a name like that unless it was completely legit.

  It was 8:30. Too early to take to the road and he realized he hadn’t eaten anything since noon. He got into the van and drove toward Frisco and pulled into a Pizza Hut. He ordered an Italian sausage with black olives and mushrooms on a large original crust to go. He waited the twenty minutes it took and drove to the Branchwater. There were a few locals having some beers and Jo was behind the bar.

  “What are you doing here? I thought you had a gig somewhere,” Jo said smiling.

  “I could ask you the same thing.”

  “Don called in and said he was sick. I think he’s hung over.”

  “I’m sorry,” Zander apologized.

  “It’s okay. I didn’t have much else to do tonight anyway. Bert is showing some property tonight.”

  “Not mine I hope.” Zander winked at Jo.

  “Nope. That place is yours as long as you want.” Jo smiled.

  “Hey, you want to share some pizza?”

  “Why not? My butt’s not big enough the way it is. I’ll supply the beers,” Jo said.

  “Your butt will always be a work of art,” Zander replied.

  “Oh sure. Just like those Italian paintings I see. Huge women with everything big but their little tiny tits,” Jo pouted.

  “Well you don’t have little tiny tits so that won’t ever be a problem.”

  “Aren’t you the sweetest thing? Drink your beer and eat the pizza,” Jo said as she slid the beers across the bar like an old pro.

  Zander and Jo enjoyed a few beers and the pizza and had some of their typical conversation that Zander enjoyed without reservation and soon it was after eleven.

  “Time to go,” Zander said as he stood up.

  “How about one more beer for the road?” Jo asked.

  “No way. I’m going to have to stop before I hit Denver to get rid of these.”

  “Well, you drive safe. Pull over if you get sleepy.”

  “Thanks, mom.” Zander gave Jo a kiss on the cheek.

  Jo straightened his shirt like a mother would do and then went to see if some of the other customers needed anything. Zander slipped out and got into the van and soon he was traveling east on I-70. It was dark and there was little traffic. He stopped just east of the Eisenhower tunnel and used a portable john. He wasn’t sure if it was for the public but no one was around so he just went ahead.

  He was through Denver in ninety minutes and feeling good. He knew that once he got past Fort Morgan it would be a boring drive with little to keep him awake. When he saw the sign for Paxton, he thought it was a good time to take a break. He drove down the main drag but the bar was already closed so he headed back to the interstate and stopped in the all night convenience store for gas and coffee. Zander had a credit card but he only used it in extreme emergencies. He didn’t believe in keeping a paper trail. That’s why he liked traveling on I-80. It was easy to find a number of all night gas stops geared for truckers at convenient intervals along the route. They all liked cash.

  Zander made it as far as North Platte before he started to feel the drive. He pulled off into a rest stop and made sure he had the keys and climbed into the back and fell asleep as soon as he hit the mattress. His intention had been to sleep for an hour or two and then move on. He woke up at 7:00 a.m.

  He had been sleeping hard and it took a few moments before he realized he had over slept. He thought he had about four hours left before he reached Omaha so he still had plenty of time to make the noon meeting with Jasper. He put the key into the side door lock and opened the door from the inside. It was the only other way to get out beside the button under the dash.

  Zander went into the restroom and took care of business. Pizza always had that effect on him. He splashed some water on his face. Pulled out his razor and shaving cream from his travel bag and shaved. He brushed his teeth and found some deodorant in the bottom of the bag. He was ready for the day.

  The trip was uneventful which was how Zander liked it. He exited I-80 at Gretna and pulled into a convenience store for gas. He was going to pick up something for breakfast until he saw an IHOP across the street. He had about an hour so he needed to eat something now because he might not get another chance until after the job.

  Zander ate a huge breakfast. He ordered three eggs easy over; sausage, wheat toast, hash browns and a three stack of peach pancakes. The waitress brought a full pot of coffee and he drank the whole thing. His timing was almost perfect. He paid the bill and drove directly to the Glass Onion.

  When Zander walked into the bar, he knew something was wrong immediately. Jasper looked pissed. He motioned toward his office door and went inside. Zander assumed he was supposed to follow. He looked over at the bar and saw Donna standing behind the coffee maker. Sunday’s were always reserved for the Bloody Mary and Mimosa bar and Sunday brunch. Donna was in charge and made sure the bacon, eggs, and toast were in the warmers. People helped themselves and poured their own drinks. Jasper never charged anyone but people left donations in a big jar at the end of the table. It was his way of thanking his customers for their business.

  “What’s up, Donna?”

  “You tell me. Jasper’s in a total funk today. Maybe you can do something?” She shrugged her shoulders.

  “I’ll give it a whirl,” Zander said and went into the office.

  Jasper was sitting in his chair waiting for Zander to close the door.

  “What bit you in the ass?” Zander asked.

  “We’ve got a problem.”

  “Now what?”

  “Brother Jim told his wife about what we were talking about.”

&nb
sp; “Damn it Jasper, what did I tell you?”

  “I know. I know. Jim doesn’t have a hair on his ass when it comes to dealing with Roberta.”

  “Is she going to be a problem?”

  “Well hell yes she’s going to be a problem. She’s a schadenfreude mixed in with being a just a huge old bitch.”

  “That could be a problem,” Zander said simply, “But I don’t understand why she would enjoy seeing us fail when we are dealing with her daughter.”

  “Because she is a control freak. Jim can’t even take a shit without finding out if it is okay with her. I wouldn’t doubt it one bit if Amy, my niece, is with that creep just to get away from her.”

  “Is Jim coming?”

  “Oh yeah and so is Roberta but I told them one o’clock to give us a little time to make a plan.”

  “Misery loves company they say. Let’s see how miserable old Roberta can get.”

  “I like the way you think,” Jasper said smiling.

  Zander was not happy. He hated loose ends and this was a big one. He and Jasper put their heads together around his desk where Jasper drew out the route they would use to get to Amy.

  It was a modest apartment complex in Council Bluffs. It was across town just over the line in Iowa. It would take about forty-five minutes to make the trip.

  Zander knew they were going to break countless laws including something about interstate kidnapping. This had better not go south or they would all be in trouble.

  “You know I’m not as good on my feet as I used to be,” Jasper said.

  Zander smiled. “You were never good on your feet. How many fights have you had? Fourteen? If memory serves me right you lost every one of them and three of those were women.”

  “You know what I mean. I don’t want you to count on me and then can’t deliver.”

  “You can drive the van can’t you?”

  “That I can do.”

  They went over a loosely put together plan for the better part of the hour. Jasper would drive and Zander would ride shotgun. He would put on his throwaway white paper coveralls on the way. It made him look the part. He would walk up to the door. If the prick opened the door he would ask if they had called Beany’s Pest Control then give him an address a block away. Zander would try to engage him in conversation even asking him to involve the lady of the house to see if they would care to have a free exterior treatment in exchange for his company putting two signs in his front yard for advertising purposes. If they bought that story he would try to gain entrance to the apartment by telling them he would give them a free estimate to do the inside of the home at a reduced cost. If he let him in, Zander would put him down with the stun gun inside the apartment. If he had to, Zander would take him down right in the doorway but he didn’t want to do that if at all possible. It could draw attention from a passerby or neighbor. Zander never asked for the guy’s name because he didn’t want to know. He didn’t want to personalize the rescue. It was to be just business and if the prick was there and in the way, he would be going down, simple and to the point. The best scenario would be not having the prick there in the first place. He could grab Amy and simply throw her in the van. The whole thing would be over in a minute or two and he could be on his way back to Frisco in just over an hour.

  It wasn’t much of a plan but it was loose enough to make changes if needed. Zander would have preferred to do all this during the week but Jasper told him the prick worked weekends so it had to be now. With any luck, he would be working and everything would go well. That was the plan anyway.

  Then the office door opened and Zander realized things had changed.

  7

  Omaha, Nebraska—Sunday, August 25, 1985

  Roberta stormed in and sat down in the one empty chair. Jim shuffled in followed by a young woman. Zander thought she might be twenty-one or twenty-two tops. She was a beauty, five foot two, blonde, maybe a hundred pounds and eyes bigger than anyone should possess. She looked like those paintings you see in little kids rooms with the little boy and girl with huge eyes. She was dressed in shorts and a white tank top with no bra. Spectacular!

  Zander looked over at Jim. He looked uncomfortable and lowered his eyes when Zander tried to engage him.

  “Jim, weren’t you told not to tell anyone else about this?” Zander asked with just the slightest bit of irritation in his voice.

  “I…I…had to say something to Roberta. She is Amy’s mother after all. She won’t be a problem,” Jim stammered.

  “She will be a huge problem,” Zander said evenly.

  Roberta sat straight and leaned forward.

  “I’m sitting right here. Don’t act like I’m not in the room and not hearing this.”

  Zander looked at her.

  “I’ll get to you in a minute.” He looked at the girl. “Who are you?”

  “I’m Glenda,” she said simply.

  “The good witch?” Zander asked smiling.

  “I get that a lot,” Glenda said and smiled back, “I’m the sister.”

  “Is your sister a beauty like you?’ Zander asked.

  “She used to be,” she said sadly, “before that bastard beat her up.”

  “Well, hopefully she will be again after we rescue her today,” Zander said quietly.

  “Oh please! When you are finished ogling my daughter, maybe you can get around to telling me what you are actually planning to do,” Roberta actually hissed when she talked. Zander thought she could be a great snake.

  Zander stared at her. Trying to make a snake uncomfortable was probably impossible but Zander thought he’d give it a try anyway. She just returned the stare with a bit of a self-satisfied smile on the corners of her mouth. She obviously had practice depreciating those around her.

  Zander figured he didn’t like her. She was everything Jasper said she was.

  After some time of this, Zander decided his tactics were going nowhere and walked over to where she was sitting. He stood directly in front of her. He always liked having the high ground.

  “We have a very simple plan. We’re going to rescue Amy.”

  Roberta started laughing.

  “Well good luck with that. She won’t go with you.”

  “One way or another, she’ll go,” Zander said simply.

  “No she won’t.” There was triumph in her eyes. “I talked to her and she doesn’t want any part of this.”

  Roberta crossed her legs smugly and Zander repressed a burning desire to knock her off the chair. Instead, he looked her right in the eyes and tried to size her up. She was a little older than Zander, maybe early forties. She might have been attractive but Zander thought that her personality got in the way of anyone seeing it. She had some nice lips but Zander couldn’t fathom anyone actually kissing them. He wondered when the last time she and Jim had sex. She was a vast wasteland.

  “Well are you going to say something or stand there like the stupid little bartender you are? Oh yes, I know all about you,” she said and she smiled but it wasn’t a pleasant smile.

  Zander realized that Roberta got her pleasure by trying to be a bully. Unfortunately for her, she was trying to bully Zander. He had seen and handled bigger bullies than her.

  “I hope you realize that you just put this whole thing in jeopardy and you may have put our lives in danger,” Zander said, trying to keep his voice from rising.

  “Well then I put my life in danger as well because I’m going with you,” she said like she had just won something.

  That seems to be the mistake people make when they think they have the upper hand. Overconfidence takes over and they think it gives them a pass to ride right over anyone they want.

  “You know you’ve put your daughter’s life in danger as well. What do you think this prick is going to do when he finds out someone is going to take away his punching bag?” Zander said, keeping calm and looking her in the eyes.

  “It’s not Amy he’ll hurt. It’s you and I want to be there when he does,” she said looking at him rig
ht back and enjoying what she thought was the pain she was inflicting.

  “You are right about one thing. You will be there when this goes down. It wasn’t part of the plan but you changed that now. I can’t trust you out of my sight while we do this,” Zander said slowly and emphasizing each word.

  “I’m going because that’s what I want to do not because….”

  Zander had enough. He reached up and thrust his index finger just below her Adam’s apple and that little indentation just below her neck.

  “You will stop talking now,” Zander said and he smiled for the first time since Roberta entered the room.

  Roberta fell off the chair onto the floor coughing. Zander sat on her chair and looked down at her.

  “Hurts, don’t it?” he stated more than asked.

  Jim took a step towards his wife.

  “Jim, stay where you are. In fact sit on that chair,” Zander motioned toward the chair he had vacated when he talked to Roberta.

  “Glenda you sit on the desk.”

  Everyone complied.

  “Jasper, a change of plans. Do you have any zip ties and duct tape?”

  “Maybe in the store room,” was all Jasper said.

  “Go get it. We’ve got to move. Is Sandy home?”

  “Yeah but she doesn’t know about any of it like you said.”

  Zander looked right at Jim.

  “At least someone can follow instructions.” He turned back to Jasper. “I’m going to call Sandy. I want her to come here and watch Jim.”

  “Well if she would do anything for anyone it would be you. Our number is above the phone,” Jasper said and he was on his way to the storeroom.

  Zander dialed the number and Sandy answered. She was a sweet woman and didn’t ask many questions. She told Zander she would be right over, fifteen minutes tops. When Zander put down the phone, Jasper came back in with the duct tape and some medium zip ties.

  “I thought I had some bigger ones,” Jasper apologized.