Avoiding Commitment

by craziebabe45

  "The guys were talking about planning a bachelor party," Chyna whispered hating that she had to break the news to her.

  "It could have been for any of them," she said but she hardly convinced herself. Doubt had crept into her voice.

  "I think they were all married," she murmured.

  "No." She shook her head and pushed a loose strand of hair behind her ears. Her sleep deprived brain couldn't process what Chyna was saying. Jack couldn't be marrying Bekah. He didn't love her. He didn't feel for her what he felt with Lexi. There was no way this could be happening. "No. No he's not," she said the weakness in her voice evident. She felt as if she had been punched in the gut. She was receiving just enough air to keep her upright.

  "What did you say? Alexa, you have to believe me. I'm just looking out for you."

  "No. I won't believe it," her voice coming out in a monotone. After all, if it was true, she had no tears left for Jack Howard.

  "I'm sorry. I didn't want to tell you. I didn't want this to happen to you," Chyna said feeling like the shittiest of shitty friend's right then.

  "This cannot be happening to me."

  "I'm sorry sweetie," Chyna said moving to her side. "Do you still want to be with him?"

  Even after that admission, even after Lexi's first realization that Jack might marry someone else, she still wanted him.

  "Is Jack really what you want after everything?" She reached out and grasped Lexi's hand affectionately.

  "You don't understand," Lexi said yanking her hand out of her grasp. "You never understood." The feeling of losing Jack overwhelmed her body. The feeling was so familiar, that it could only be associated with him. Her heart felt as if it were being fed through a shredder, and then played back in reverse.

  "How could I understand?" Chyna asked vehemently. "Do you even see yourself? You're a wreck. You look exactly the same as last time. You're shutting down and shutting everyone out. You can't let him do this to you every time he comes back into your life. Can't you see that this boy has done a number on you that can never be undone, unless you let him go? You have to just let him go."

  "How can I let him go?" she asked her breathing coming out shallow. "How can I let him go if he won't let me?"

  "You have to find a way to be strong."

  "No, I just can't be sure. I have to go to him and find out what the truth is."

  "You think he's going to tell you the truth?" Chyna asked dubiously.

  "He damn well better!"

  * * *

  Awesome Reviewers: Cupid's Psyche, Sure As The Dawn, Karma Bites, and CaliBound

  K.A. Linde

  FML

  And it took so long just to feel alright

  Remember how to put back the light in my eyes

  I wish I would have missed the first time that we kissed

  Cause you broke all your promises

  And now your back

  You don't get to get me back

  - Christina Perri "Jar of Hearts"

  * * *

  Chapter 24: Present

  Chyna managed to talk Lexi into getting a few hours of much needed rest. She needed to be of the right state of mind to talk with Jack. And, anyways, he would probably be sleeping at six o'clock in the morning when Lexi was ready to burst into his apartment and confront him. The exhaustion that had crept up on her that whole night suddenly evaporated with the prospect of finally coming to a conclusion about her relationship with Jack. Restless sleep eventually overtook her, but it did very little to stem her anticipation.

  The thoughts swirling around in her brain only managed to make her more nervous about her upcoming appointment with disaster. She couldn't fathom that Jack had lied to her. Sure she had imagined him telling half-truths and even straight keeping things from her, but not flat out lying. They had always been up front about their feelings and how they were going to work…no matter how dysfunctional everything else turned out to be.

  When she finally awoke the next day, she found that somehow she had managed to sleep through a good portion of the day. She wasn't certain how that had happened, but was grateful for the break from her earlier thoughts. Except that left her with only a few brief hours to accomplish everything she needed to get done. She canceled her flight that Jack purchased for her earlier that month reimbursing those funds to his card. With Chyna's arrival, Lexi decided to leave on the private jet she had come into town on. A flight that would leave that very night. A flight that Lexi was not certain she was ready to get on.

  She groggily got out of bed, reaching for her phone. Beyond the two messages from Ramsey making sure she had made it home alright and apologizing for his inappropriate behavior, there was nothing else. Jack hadn't called. He hadn't texted. He had made no effort to get in contact with her after their escapade.

  Lexi lazily tossed the thing back into her purse and strolled into the bathroom. After a scalding hot shower to clear her mind, Lexi did some extra pampering. She needed to look her best when she spoke with him. If she looked as shitty as she felt, then she would lose a good deal of the confidence that she needed. She let her loose curls go about their business and applied a small amount of make-up to highlight her golden skin and large brown eyes. Her hair covered the damage done to her back, but she had to touch up her neck where a few hickeys were beginning to show. A thin layer of lipstick hid the bruising on her bottom lip. A purple dress that was simple, yet, showed enough skin to still be appealing was her first choice. She paired it with black strappy sandals. She hoped it was enough.

  Her first instinct was to go by his apartment and with Chyna's approval, she took the town car across the city. As she approached the entranceway, the attendant who had been on duty when she had stayed the night at Jack's less than a week ago was just exiting the building. "Oh excuse me," the attendant said almost running into her.

  "No problem at all. Hey, I think I know you," Lexi said.

  "Oh yeah," the girl said pointing her finger at Lexi as if she were placing her. "You know Jack, right?"

  "Yeah. Do you know if he's in right now?" Lexi asked taking a step closer to the doorway.

  The girl seemed to mull it over. After a second of contemplation she answered, "I don't think he is. I remember him leaving this afternoon."

  "Do you happen to know where he was going?" Lexi asked knowing she sounded snoopy.

  "Look I don't really like to get involved," she said crossing her arms across her chest uncomfortably.

  "Oh no, I totally understand," she said immediately. She had to be quick on her toes or else she wouldn't get any information. "It's just his girlfriend is freaking out because he won't answer his phone, and she asked me to come by since she couldn't."

  "Well," the girl began tilting her head sideways.

  "I swear I wouldn't bother you if it wasn't an emergency," Lexi said lathering on the desperation.

  The girl sighed and tossed her hair over her shoulder. "He came down earlier and looked a bit bummed out. Said he needed to get some things accomplished at the office, but don't tell him I told you so," she said racing down the remaining stairs, across the street, and into a parked Civic.

  With more direction then when she had woken up this morning, Lexi piled back into the town car on her way to Bridges Enterprise. She knew the building well from her long history in the city, but had never ventured inside. All she knew about the business was that the Bridges name had been around for a long time, it comprised of attorneys, accountants, and any other form of business that could assist you with your troubles, and that they charged a fortune for their rather successful services.

  The town car dropped Lexi off at the base of the monumental staircase leading up to the building. After climbing the flight of stairs, she stepped into Bridges Enterprise, an enormous, emasculating building covered almost completely in glass, for the first time. The high-arched, sleek entranceway opened into a clean, marble tiled lobby with forty foot ceilings, plush leather sofas, and high-glossed counter space. Every person was impecc
ably dressed in the latest fashions as well as physically fit and attractive. The women all wore knee-length skirt suits with high heels while the men wore suits each with a different color tie. It was terrifying being in a room with so many well-groomed individuals. Lexi's simple dress suddenly felt out of place, but she held her head high regardless.

  She cautiously approached a tiny Asian woman working behind the reception desk. People milled around the lobby some entering and exiting elevators, stopping to chat with an associate, or waiting patiently for their important meeting. With a company this large it was necessary to have the office available to clients seven days a week.

  "Thank you very much. Here at Bridges Enterprise we do everything we can to bridge the distance between you and your troubles. Have a wonderful day," she said hanging up the phone before looking up at Lexi. "May I help you?" the woman asked a genuine smile crossing her face.

  "Yes, I am here to see Jack Howard," Lexi told the woman hoping to make it see more of a demand than a request.

  The woman smirked and glanced down at the monitor in front of her. She clicked a few buttons before returning her eyes to Lexi. "Do you have a meeting with Mr. Howard?"

  "Not exactly," she admitted, "but I do need to see him."

  "Mr. Howard is a very busy man. So I hope you understand when I say that you would have to have an appointment to see him," she stated firmly.

  "Right well does he have a full schedule today?" Lexi asked attempting to peer over the desk.

  "He has the day marked off to be with Ms. Bridges."

  "But he is in the office today," Lexi badgered anxious to get this over with.

  "Is there anything I can assist you with?" the woman asked dodging the question effortlessly.

  "Not unless you can tell me what office is his," she said deliberately.

  "Ma'am unless you have an appointment, which you do not, then Mr. Howard is unavailable to you. However, there are many more trained professionals in his department that are free this afternoon if you would like to make an appointment with one of them."

  "No thank you," Lexi said gnawing on her bottom lip. What a waste of time. This woman would be of any more help…not that she had been much in the first place. Obviously Jack was here in his office. The only problem was she had no idea where that was and the building was a million stories high with hundreds of offices. She could search all day and never locate him, but she didn't have that time.

  She thanked the woman and walked away from the counter looping around towards the elevators. Hopping on the first elevator that dinged open, Lexi stood between several men in high quality suits. As she slowly approached the top floor, she found she was finally left alone with one of the men. Putting on the most girly look she could muster, Lexi cried, "Shoot!" She let the Southern drawl, which she typically didn't have, permeate through the word. The man glanced over at her in surprise, but she could see it was also intrigue. He quickly faced the front again not deeming it appropriate to intervene. "Um, excuse me," she cooed drawing his attention back to her.

  "Yes ma'am?" he asked, the perfect gentleman.

  "You see," she began huffing a little in embarrassment, "I have an appointment with Mr. Howard today." His eyes widened in surprise. "But I've forgotten where his office is," she told him casting her eyes down and hoping she could find some semblance of innocence in the gesture. "I was wondering if you could maybe point me in the right direction. The woman at the front told me, but Lord, I'd lose my head if it wasn't attached to my body."

  He marveled at her unadulterated beauty for a second before answering. "Sure not a problem," he said buying her act. He pressed another button on the elevator and turned to attempt to make small talk with her from there.

  "What are you seeing Mr. Howard for, if you don't mind me asking?" he asked leaning back against the metal hand railing.

  "Uh…" Lexi tucked a loose strand of hair behind her ear. She hadn't thought this far forward with her plan and had no alibi for seeing Jack. No doubt she had always been a terrible liar so making something up on the spot wasn't going to work for her. She was amazed she had made it this far with acting.

  "It's alright," he said immediately reading her discomfort. "You don't have to tell me. We have a number of people coming in with troubles that need to be solved. You're lucky you got Jack. He's one of our best," the man said admiringly. She had completely forgotten that she was in a place where talking about her problems was confidential business. At least something was working in her favor.

  "Well that's wonderful," she stated dryly pleased and displeased at the same time that Jack was doing so well for himself. A part of her maliciously wondered how much Bekah had a hand in that.

  "Here is his floor," he said when the elevator landed. "All the way down the hallway and on the right. Can't miss it. His secretary should be here. Her name is Gwen. She can take it from here."

  "Thank you so much Mr…" she waited for his name. He had been an invaluable resource.

  "Oh what was I thinking?" he asked smacking himself on the forehead. "Brandon Calloway." He pulled out his wallet and extracted a business card. She took it from him smiling to herself.

  "Pleasure to meet you Mr. Calloway."

  "Call me Brandon," he muttered huskily, leaning against the elevator door to hold it open for her while they chatted.

  "Brandon," she repeated placing the card delicately into her purse.

  "I hope everything works out for you. If Jack doesn't help, just let me know. I'm in office 2404. Stop in anytime," he told her invitingly.

  "Well, uh, thanks," she said stepping through the door.

  "No problem. What's your name?" he asked smoothly as she passed through the sliding doors.

  "Lexi. Lexi Walsh," she said as she disappeared down the hallway. When she glanced over her shoulder, he was still standing there staring after her. Something had changed in his look and his mouth was hanging slightly open. She wasn't sure what that was about, but she couldn't concentrate on that now. He had played his part and now she needed to bridge the distance between her own troubles.

  She followed Brandon's directions and found a blonde, no surprise there, sitting at a desk in front of a large corner office. "May I help you?" the woman asked looking up from her computer screen. She had a British accent, impeccably white teeth, and perfectly fake breasts revealed in her low cut blouse.

  "Is Jack in?" Lexi asked smirking at the predictability of the woman's appearance.

  "Indeed. However, Mr. Howard is not taking appointments today." She looked down at her screen, scrolled through a program, then glanced back up. "I believe I can squeeze you in Thursday afternoon if that works for you darling."

  Lexi scoffed. "Um, no I leave this afternoon and I need to see him now."

  "I'm sorry that would simply be impossible. Perhaps when you are next in town then," she stated simply. Lexi rolled her eyes and walked around the desk completely ignoring the girl. "Ma'am you cannot go in there."

  "Sorry. I need to see him," she said rushing to the door. "Jack can I come in?" Lexi asked knocking swiftly on the large wooden door. "You're…uh…secretary said you were in," she took another glance at the leggy blonde behind her who was just now getting out of her seat to stop her.

  "Ma'am he is unavailable," Gwen said standing with her hands on her hips in frustration. "You can't just barge in there."

  "Oh is it not locked?" Lexi asked smiling devilishly as she turned the handle and the door popped open.

  "Stop, you're going to get me in trouble," Gwen cried rushing after her.

  "Jack," Lexi murmured seeing him sitting behind his desk.

  "Gwen I thought I told you no visitors this afternoon," Jack muttered not even glancing up from his desk.

  Lexi's determination wavered at the sight of him. He was wearing a tailored navy blue suit over a crisp white button up. The top button was undone and his navy and silver neck tie was pulled loose. His dark hair fell over his eyes as he scanned through a report bound in a
plastic cover with the Bridges Enterprise emblem displayed upon the front. She couldn't even look past him to check out his amazing office she was so utterly bound by his appearance and commanding presence.

  "Sir, I certainly did not let her in. This young lady just barged in demanding that she see you." Gwen gave Lexi a death glare.

  "Well see her out," Jack said still not looking up. Gwen moved forward and latched onto Lexi's arm. She attempted to veer her out of the room, but Lexi wouldn't budge. When she started yanking on her arm, her long fingernails digging into her skin, Lexi couldn't take it any longer. Jack still hadn't looked up at her.

  "Jack honestly," Lexi cried standing her ground.

  "Lex?" he asked apparently extremely surprised to see her standing in his office.

  "You know this woman, sir?" Gwen asked dropping her hands and placing them behind her back promptly. She looked between them with poisonous daggers shooting sparks at Lexi's back. She was not too pleased that he knew Lexi. Somehow this didn't surprise Lexi. She wondered if Jack had been sleeping with this woman. The anger at the possibility of him diddling his secretary reminded Lexi why she was there in the first place. She and Jack had a score to settle, and it had to happen today, right now.

  "Yes Gwen. It's fine. You can go," he said dismissing her without breaking his gaze which was still set on Lexi.

  "Yes sir," Gwen said bitterly, turning on her designer heels and stalking out the door.

  "The door," Jack called out to Gwen.

  She stepped back into the room and yanked the handle slamming the door shut. "Well she's…something, isn't she?" Lexi asked smirking.

  Jack rolled his eyes and set his papers down on his desk. Lexi took that opportunity to really take in her surroundings. Just like the outside, the entire perimeter of the office was cased in glass overlooking the city. The view was spectacular and at night time, Lexi could only assume, it would be even better. A large bookshelf was covered with material pertinent to his work as well as the only picture frames Lexi had seen in Jack's presence since her arrival. One picture in a metal frame of him and Bekah vacationing somewhere on the coast stood out to Lexi. Another picture of Jack with the guys in Las Vegas was framed. His diploma was mounted onto the wall in a stunning frame with a red, black, and white tassel displayed alongside it.