Sophie’s face ached with the effort of keeping a smile plastered on it, but that was nothing compared to the pain in her heart. Every time she’d attempted to create a bit of physical distance between her and Zach, he’d closed it right back up again. It was as if he was doing it on purpose, or as if he didn’t trust her to let her out of his sight.
She sighed. It was probably the latter. Although she didn’t quite know what he thought she could get up to here. No, she decided. She was just being foolish. The past two weeks had been emotionally taxing and she wasn’t her usual self. These stupid, fanciful imaginings were a perfect case in point.
“Dance?” Zach’s voice interrupted her thoughts.
“Wh-what?” she asked, momentarily confused.
“I was asking you to dance,” he replied with a small quirk of his lips. “It’s a common enough custom at weddings, I understand.”
“O-of course it is,” she stammered.
“So, will you join me on the dance floor?”
He rose and held out a hand to her and with the eyes of several of their clients, who were seated at other tables, upon them, she couldn’t very well refuse. She put her hand in his, steeling herself for the reaction she knew was to come, but that was nothing compared to when they joined the swirl of couples on the dance floor. It seemed everyone had decided to join them, which forced them into far closer proximity than was reasonable or comfortable.
Worse, the music had slowed to a dreamy number, one where couples took advantage of the crowded floor to move together hip to hip, their eyes locked on one another, their hands entwined. As beautiful as it was, it was also well-nigh unbearable, Sophie decided as she fought to keep a scant few inches between herself and Zach—a distance that was suddenly closed as another couple bumped into them.
“I’m sorry,” Sophie said, pulling slightly away.
The heat of his body had seared through the gown she wore and her hips had brushed all too intimately close to his.
“No problem, but I think you’re fighting a losing battle. Why don’t you just give in and enjoy it?” he murmured, even as he increased the pressure of his hand against the small of her back, drawing her against him.
Their closeness was both an exquisite pleasure and an excruciating agony at the same time. Her body recognized his instantly, her blood heating and her pulse increasing as they moved together in time to the music. Hip to hip, belly to belly, it was an intoxicating temptation and a cruel torment. Sophie was aware of every flex of muscle, every breath he took.
His light cologne, boosted on the scent of his skin, teased her nostrils and the warm clasp of his hand holding hers made her all too aware of the memory of what that hand had felt like on other parts of her body. Parts that were now taut and aching for more. She stood it for about two minutes, but even that was two minutes more than enough.
“I can’t do this,” she said abruptly, pulling out of his grasp. Turning away, she made her way through the throng and back to their table.
Zach was instantly by her side. Typical, she thought bitterly. Why give her a few minutes to pull herself together when he could just prolong the torture?
“Come on,” he said. “I’ll take you home.”
“No, I’m fine. Besides, it’d be rude to leave before Lila and Sam do.”
He looked at her, a small frown of concern marring his broad forehead.
“Are you sure?”
She painted on a smile. “Of course I’m sure. Oh, look, I’ve just seen someone I need to catch up with. Will you excuse me?”
Sophie slipped away and began walking toward the opposite side of the festivities. She felt Zach’s burning gaze on a spot between her shoulder blades for about the first twenty steps then, mercifully, it was gone. Her shoulders slumped in relief. Having to work with Zach all week was one thing, but having to spend time with him socially, as well—well, that was about more than any woman should be asked to bear.
Circulating among Lila’s friends wouldn’t normally have been a problem, but Sophie was beginning to feel as if she was playing a sophisticated game of tag by the time Lila was getting ready to toss her bouquet. She’d moved from one group to another, each time shadowed only a few minutes later by Zach. It was exhausting trying to stay ahead of him. Thankfully she could leave soon.
Amid much cajoling and friendly rivalry, she joined the single ladies in a group, waiting for Lila to throw her flowers. She hung well to the back, not at all eager to win the prize. She already knew that she couldn’t be with the man she wanted, and no bouquet would magically change that fact—more was the pity.
“Are you all ready?” Lila called out to the group with a beaming smile.
A chorus of voices assured her it was time to hurry up and get on with it. With another smile Lila turned her back and her arm swung in a graceful arc upward, releasing the flowers to fly through the air. Sophie didn’t want to catch it, she really didn’t. She didn’t even so much as have her hands up, but fate had a seriously sick sense of humor right now because sure enough, the flowers sailed directly toward her and would have struck her full in the chest if she hadn’t put up her hands to catch them.
For the briefest moment she clutched them to her chest, inhaling the sweet, rich scent of the pale-pink roses interspersed through lush white chrysanthemums, before thrusting them back out and away from her.
“Here,” she said to Piper Kindred, who’d been a year ahead of her at school. “You have them.”
Before Piper could respond, Sophie thrust the flowers in her hands and turned to walk swiftly away.
“But you won them, fair and square,” the curly redhead called out to her retreating form.
“They’re all yours,” Sophie threw over her shoulder before making her way to her table and collecting her clutch.
She couldn’t wait to get out of here and she counted the minutes until Lila and Sam made their goodbyes to everyone. As the departing couple reached her, Sophie put her arms out to her friend and gave her an enormous hug.
“Be happy,” she whispered in Lila’s ear.
“Oh, I am,” her friend answered with a squeeze. “Your turn next. Don’t think it won’t happen just because you off-loaded the bouquet to someone else.”
Sophie forced a smile to her face as she pulled away from Lila’s embrace, allowing her to move on to the next person. Then, in a flurry of rose petals, the newlyweds were driven away—a “Just Married” sign in the back window and tin cans clanking the full length of the Double H driveway and lending a slightly incongruous note to the gleaming black stretch limousine Beau had arranged for his daughter and her new husband.
Zach moved beside her.
“Okay?” he asked, his eyes searching hers as if looking for something.
“Yes, I’m fine, although I am rather tired. I’d like to go now but please, do stay if you want to. I’ll get a ride with someone else heading back to town.”
She gestured in the direction of a small group of people heading toward their cars.
“You came with me,” Zach said firmly, “so I’ll see you safely home.”
The drive back to her house was a long and silent one and when they pulled up outside her apartment, Sophie all but shot out of the car.
“Thank you,” she said through the open door. “I’ll see you at work on Monday.”
She pushed the door closed with a solid thunk and started up the path as fast as her high heels could carry her.
“Sophie, wait!” Zach called out.
She turned and swallowed hard as she saw him striding determinedly toward her.
“Could I come in for a minute?”
Refusal hovered on the tip of her tongue but good manners prevailed. “Sure,” she said slightly ungraciously.
Good manners were one thing but she didn’t have to sound happy about it. Her hand shook slightly as she tried to insert her key in the door and she startled as Zach’s hand closed around hers, guiding the metal key into the keyhole.
&nbs
p; “Thank you,” she muttered grimly as the door swung open.
He followed her inside, altogether too closely for her equilibrium. She gestured for him to take a seat while she went through to her bedroom and tossed her clutch onto the bed, taking a moment to drag in a steadying breath. Composed again, she went back to the living room.
“Can I offer you something to drink? Tea, coffee, something stronger?” she said as brightly as she could manage.
“Whiskey and water, thanks.”
*
Zach watched as Sophie went to her compact kitchen and he could hear her opening and closing cupboards, then the sound of liquid pouring. She came back through with one glass on a tray together with a small matching jug, its cut crystal cloudy with ice water.
“You’re not joining me in a drink?”
“No,” she answered matter-of-factly before perching on the edge of the seat farthest from him.
He added water to his whiskey and took an appreciative sip. “Thank you. This is good.”
“You’re welcome. Are you sure you will be safe to drive home after that?”
“Why? Worried you might be forced to allow me to stay?” he teased.
From the rigid set of her posture, his comment didn’t go down at all well. He sighed softly and put his glass down on a coaster.
“Don’t worry, Sophie. I’ll be fine. I stuck to club soda at the wedding.”
“Good,” she said abruptly, then frowned. “Although I would have called you a cab.”
Zach let loose with a full-bellied laugh, earning a look of censure from his hostess.
“I’m sorry, Sophie. I shouldn’t have teased you. Not about that. Seriously, though, I wanted to talk to you tonight.”
She stiffened and braced her shoulders, as if expecting bad news. “Really? Nothing that could wait until Monday?”
“No, I didn’t want to discuss this at work. I’ve been thinking a great deal about our last night together.” A great deal? Who was he kidding? He hadn’t been able to get it out of his mind. He couldn’t walk past the windows by the pool without remembering what it had been like to make love to her in the blue water. He’d even considered moving into another bedroom, except he knew he’d never be able to rid himself of the memories they’d created together there, no matter where he did or didn’t sleep.
“Oh?” Sophie answered. “I would have thought you’d have managed to move on from that by now.”
“I would have, too. But it seems I can’t. I can’t sleep without dreaming about you, I can’t be awake without thinking about you.” He shook his head. “Look, I’m going about this all wrong. In fact, I went about everything all wrong that night when I saw you on my computer.”
“I was in the wrong. I shouldn’t have—”
“No, wait, let me speak. I overreacted, Sophie, and I’m sorry. I was stressed out about Anna and about Alex, and it made me unreasonably defensive.”
“But I had no right to go snooping in your private affairs,” she said more strongly.
“Actually, you had every right. You suspected, wrongly, thank God, that I was involved in Alex’s disappearance. And yes, I had been cagey at work about what I was doing. It’s no wonder you put two and two together and managed to get five or more. Seriously, if I had suspected you of being involved in Alex going missing, I would have done exactly the same thing—probably even less subtly.” He shoved a hand through his hair, then reached for his drink and took another sip. “Look, I’m really sorry, Sophie. It’s been a hellish time and you bore the brunt of it. What with Anna going missing a few days beforehand and then finally getting her parents to agree she needed help, I just lashed out at the most convenient person.”
“Me?”
“Yeah, they say you tend to do that with the ones closest to you.” He paused, letting his words sink in a little before he continued. “And I do want to be close to you, Sophie. This past week has taught me that. I’m really sorry I hurt you and that I was so cruel. I hope you can forgive me and, more importantly, that you’ll give me, us, another chance. I care for you, I really do, and I think we could make a strong future together. Obviously, Anna will always be a part of our lives—”
“No! Stop!” Sophie held up one hand, shaking her head frantically, her eyes wide open, stark against the paleness of her skin. “Don’t, I can’t. We can’t. It’s impossible.”
Her words cut like razors across his nerves. Can’t? Impossible? When he spoke he tried to infuse his words with as much persuasion as he possibly could.
“Sophie, please. I have very strong feelings for you, and I’m pretty sure you do for me, too. Can’t we at least try to make it work? Don’t you think we deserve one more chance?”
Sophie’s head dropped and she stared at her hands clenched on her knees. He clearly heard the shuddering breath she drew in before she spoke.
“Zach, please, don’t get me wrong. I’m honored that you think you have feelings for me—”
“I don’t think I do, Sophie. I know,” he said with quiet conviction.
He’d expected resistance—it was only natural after the way he’d treated her—but he would wear that resistance down, however much it took to do so.
She lifted her head and looked directly at him, her beautiful eyes swimming with unshed tears. “I can’t accept them, Zach. Please respect that.”
“Respect what? You’re not telling me anything. At least tell me why.”
She shook her head just as a tear began to track a silvered trail down one cheek. A tear that just about rent his heart in two.
“Please, Zach, please go. This is painful for me. I need you to leave, now.”
There was nothing else for it. She’d asked him to go and while every cell in his body protested, commanding that he stay—comfort her, argue with her, figure out what the hell it was that was keeping her from him—he rose from his chair and saw himself to the door.
Sixteen
Zach sat in his car, still parked at the curb outside Sophie’s place. One hand on the wheel, the other poised to turn on the ignition. But he didn’t move. All he could do was think about the woman he’d walked away from. It was crazy. He hadn’t gotten where he was today by giving up, by simply walking away because someone had asked him to. His entire reputation had been built on taking risks and winning. And he wasn’t about to stop doing that now.
Decision made, he flung open his car door and slammed it behind him, keying the remote locking button as he strode back up Sophie’s path. He reached the door and, only just resisting the urge to pound on its painted surface and holler at her to let him back in, politely pressed the doorbell.
“Who is it?”
“It’s me.”
“Zach, I asked you to go. I’m all done talking about this.”
He could hear the weary unhappiness in her voice and it made his gut twist.
“And I’m not,” he insisted. “I’m also not leaving until you tell me exactly why you’re not prepared to give us another chance. The way I see it, we can do this one of two ways. Either I stand here shouting through your door, or you can let me in and we can do this face-to-face.”
Silence.
“Sophie—” he pressed the doorbell again “—just how much sleep do you think you’re going to get with me doing this every five seconds?”
Slowly the door opened in front of him.
“About as much as I’ve had all week. Fine, come in then, before you disturb my neighbors.”
“Thank you.”
He couldn’t quite keep the smug satisfaction out of his voice. She’d caved far sooner than he’d have guessed.
“I don’t know why you’re doing this,” she said wearily, wrapping her arms around herself. “I’m entitled to not want to be with you, you know.”
“Sure you are, but you really do want to be with me, you just won’t let yourself. That’s different. Here,” he said, taking her by her shoulders and gently guiding her down onto one end of the sofa before settling beside he
r. “Now tell me why you’re prepared to let go of what is probably the best thing ever to happen to either of us.”
Sophie looked at him and from the expression on her face, it was almost as if doing so caused her immeasurable pain. “I…I don’t know where to begin,” she said shakily.
“Try the beginning,” he coaxed, his hands reaching to hold hers as if to infuse her with the courage she needed to get started.
“You know that my sister was separated from us when we were little. Mom and I started over. Just the two of us for over twenty years. Mom met a really great guy four years ago and she finally remarried. It took her all that time to be willing to take a risk on loving another man again, and she finally had the courage to take what he offered her with both hands. They’ve been away, fulfilling their dreams of visiting every presidential library around America, and she’s finally happy.”
Sophie fell silent for a moment, then rose abruptly from her seat to begin pacing the floor.
“Over the years I’d asked Mom about finding Suzie, but it would always make her cry, so I learned to shut up about it—to just tuck it away inside. But then a couple of months ago, Mom asked if I still wanted to find her. We talked about it and decided now was a good time for us to try. To see if we could establish a bond again, if she was willing.
“It hasn’t been easy. All the information we had on my stepdad’s sister lead to dead ends.” Her mouth curved into a rueful twist. “And as you know, my investigative skills aren’t up to much. Recently, I hired a private investigator, but that proved to be an exercise in futility. He was either lazy or useless or both,” she said bitterly. “And then Suzie just turned up in front of me one day. Just like that.”
“Seriously? But that’s wonderful news, isn’t it?” Zach was even more confused.
While he still didn’t see what this had to do with him and Sophie, surely it had to be exactly what she’d hoped for, especially after all this time.
“Yes, and no,” Sophie prevaricated.
He could see she was battling with what she had to say. Choosing her words and turning them over in her mind carefully before speaking.
Something about the Boss... Page 13