Learning to Trust

by Cynthia P. O'Neill

  His hand came to rest on the exposed leg that was sticking out from the slightly opened robe as I sat on the barstool next to him. “You could give Jonathan a run for his money with this quiche.”

  Garrett helped me with the dishes when we were done eating breakfast. Afterwards, he pulled us into the shower to show me how much he appreciated me cooking for him. Needless to say, I now have a little tile burn across my back, but I’m not complaining.

  He left me in the bathroom to dry my hair, citing a need to make a phone call. When he returned, he was dressed in navy cargo shorts, light blue polo shirt and sneakers, looking very relaxed and happy. He grabbed my hand and led me into the bedroom.

  It was no surprise to see my clothes laid out for me. I wanted to complain about this issue, but decided to make him happy given his dream and the fact that he would be leaving on business in a few days.

  He dressed me in a teal sundress with a flared skirt that fell just below mid-thigh. My only other attire was a black two-piece bikini, sandals and a pair of Ray Ban sunglasses.

  He ran his fingers slowly through my hair. “I love how your hair looks down, but you may want to wear it up in a clip for now.”

  Before I could question anything, there was a knock at the door and he ran to get it while I went looking for a clip to pull my hair back.

  Moments later, we were headed to the garage with a picnic basket, which I’m guessing was delivered by Thompson, and the promise of a magical afternoon. I’d anticipated taking either his own personal car, which I had still not seen, or my new Evoque, so I was shocked to see him press the buttons to unlock the Buggati Vitesse.

  The car’s interior was amazing, with everything fully electronic. The seat seemed to mold to my shape and felt like a second skin. I still couldn’t understand why he had me clip my hair, until he pushed a button and the hard top extended backwards out of sight, forcing the car into a convertible mode. He reached back into the picnic basket and pulled out a baseball hat, before pulling out of the garage and into the warm sunlight. Man he looked hot in that hat!

  “Where are we going?” I finally asked.

  “I want to spend a relaxing day at the beach with you, Laurel; no one but you and me.” His hand reached over and pulled mine back to his knee, where he interlaced our fingers and kept it there during the course of our hour long drive.

  We ended up in the driveway of a modest beach house. He explained that it belonged to a co-worker and he’d gotten permission to come over and use the pool and beach at any time.

  The music of the ocean, with the waves crashing against the shore and the smell of salt in the air, was exactly what I needed after such a chaotic week. Garrett must’ve known how I was feeling. He was attentive as usual, catering to my every need. He fed me a wonderful picnic lunch, rubbed sunscreen all over my body, though I teased him, saying it was just an excuse to get his hands on me, which he didn’t deny, and held me close in the water. I was sad when the sun began to set and he said it was time to go home.

  We stopped at a small seafood restaurant near the beach before heading back and then I must’ve dozed off in the car, because the next thing I remembered was the ding of the elevator, being carried into my apartment, undressed and tucked into bed with a gentle, “Sleep, my sweet Laurel.”

  I reached out for his hand. “Don’t go.” I was worried if he left that the world I’d come to know this past week would be over and this would all be a dream.

  I watched as he slipped out of his clothes and then slipping into bed with me, drawing my back up against the length of his body. His hands began to feel across my body, igniting the fire in my belly. It wasn’t long before Garrett hitched my leg back above his and drove into me from behind. He made slow, soft, passionate love to me, building us on a steady climb towards our peak until we both shattered together and fell into sleep.

  I was almost asleep when I heard him murmur in a pained voice, “Never leave me. I want to know every inch of you, possess you. You’re mine.”

  “Yours,” was all that came from my mouth, though not really audibly, as sleep pulled me under.

  My fantasy world soon shifted to include my dream job and my ideal roommate. Life had been changing quickly around me. I’d been working at Bio-Medical Life Solutions for a few weeks and loved every minute of it.

  The Engineering Department was filled with bright minds from around the country, each specializing in various things to help improve people’s lives. My immediate supervisor, Daniel Newton, and his manager, Rick Sanders, were exciting to work for and they had mutual consideration for making their employees happy. They listened to everyone’s ideas and gave praise and credit where it was due, causing everyone to feel more like a second family than simply coworkers.

  Garrett didn’t like having to leave me only a couple days after starting my job, especially with my sugar levels still bouncing around and the confirmation that I did indeed have diabetes, so he had my bosses watching my every move in regards to when I ate, how I was feeling, and if I’d had my snacks. It was appreciated though overwhelming; but that was Garrett, he consumed every part of me.

  Somehow he had managed to get a hold of Grace and sped up her arrival time so I wouldn’t be by myself for as long and would have someone watching what I ate and did at home. I hadn’t expected Grace’s arrival for another week and nearly jumped out of my skin when I came in from work and saw her walk out of her room, smiling at me without warning. “Jesus, Grace! You nearly gave me a heart attack.”

  “Surprise!” was all she could say, before grabbing me up in a big bear hug.

  I was stupefied. “How?”

  She guided me towards the sofa, which meant it would be one humdinger of a story. “Apparently this Garrett guy of yours has some sort of pull and connections with Waters Pharmaceuticals. He had Evan hire movers to go ahead and pack up my stuff, including my car, so all I had to do was hold on to a few changes of clothes, go through graduation, and fly right down—first class even!”

  I watched as she looked around the room, taking in the recently delivered mixed bouquet of roses, and then back at me. “What’s going on, Laurel?”

  “What do you mean? Nothing’s going on,” I countered.

  “Don’t give me that bullshit; you’re talking with me here. I want the 411 on how you met Garrett and everything up until right now. Spill it!” She crossed her arms and legs and narrowed her eyes at me like she used to do when we were kids to get me to crack, and of course, it worked. No one could hold out for long under her stare.

  Grace listened intently as I started from the beginning and filled her in on all the details, including some of the sordid ones. When I was done, her eyes were bugging out of her head and her jaw nearly hit the floor.

  I sat there in silence, waiting for her to process everything. Several minutes passed when she finally spoke. “I think the guy really cares for you. You don’t go to those kinds of extremes for someone if you don’t have real feelings for them. Has he said anything to you yet?”

  My head shook in response. “It’s not like that between us. We’re just good friends who happen to enjoy some perks.” I must have turned three or four shades of pink admitting those things to my cousin.

  “Laurel, you’ve never been one to allow benefits. This guy has managed to get you to come out of your protective shell, open up, and obviously trust him to some extent, if you’re allowing him into your bed.”

  There was no lying to Grace. She had a way of knowing what was in my heart before I did. “I guess if I admit it to myself, I do care for him and how he makes me feel. For the first time, I don’t have to think about anything when I’m with him. I don’t have to worry that I’m going to do something wrong. He somehow possesses my body and soul so I get to live in the moment and just enjoy. That sounds crazy, right?”

  She reached over, laying her hand on mine. “Honey, that’s what you call love, or a really severe case of lust. But my bet is on the first one.”

  �
��I’m not sure either one of us is ready for an intense relationship. My fears and trust issues are better, but not gone. I don’t like admitting this, but when Garrett is with me, the nightmares either go away or stay at a level that’s tolerable. Whenever he’s traveling or decides to stay at his place, they come back.” I wanted to elaborate more on my issues, but found myself getting emotional. “I think Garrett may have been hurt in the past, too,” I said, which made her head pop up with a questioning look.

  I enlightened Grace on the information the Waters family had passed along the night of the gala and his recent nightmare. I also noted the strange occurrences of him having use of Thompson, access to some of perks Mr. Waters enjoyed, wearing high end clothes and everything he’d bought for me.

  “If he grew up as close friends with Mr. Waters, then he probably has an amazing salary and is just enjoying some of the perks of his friendship with him. I wouldn’t read too much into it, Laurel. You and I have been known to share clothing, cars and numerous other things because we trust each other. He’s probably just doing some of the same.”

  I reached over and gave her a quick hug. I still couldn’t believe she was finally here with me. “Thanks for always being here for me and helping me see the big picture on things.”

  She patted my back. “That’s what family is for, hon. You’ve had my back I don’t know how many times. It’s time for me to return the favor.”

  Garrett had been out of town for a few weeks, having toured most of the Midwest and the West Coast for new graduating talent for the various businesses Mr. Waters owned. He managed to call every chance he had, though our schedules didn’t always mesh where we had time to talk, so occasionally we would send each other quick text message, mainly to say, “Hi,” or “Miss you.”

  One day I was in the break room at work, eating with a co-worker, when my phone buzzed with an incoming text.

  Garrett: Can’t stop thinking about you. My bed is lonely without you.

  Me: You’re probably just bored. When’s your next meeting?

  Garrett: In twenty minutes. Miss me? :(

  Me: Of course, probably more than you miss me.

  Garrett: Wanna bet?

  Me: Okay??

  Several minutes passed and I was wondering what happened to our texting. Did he get called into a meeting? Have a phone call? Why wasn’t he responding?

  I continued eating and listening to my co-worker rant about a problem she was having when I felt my phone buzz again, signaling another incoming message. I knew it would be him sending another text, but nearly choked when I saw the picture he had attached. I quickly excused myself from the table, saying I needed a little air to clear my mind.

  My legs walked towards the bathroom, where I could get some privacy in a stall and looked at the phone again to make sure I wasn’t imaging things. Sure enough, the horndog sent a picture of his privates, cock standing at full attention. Before I could respond, another text came in.

  Garrett: Now do you believe how much I miss you?

  Me: That just means you’re horny.

  I didn’t want to ask what came next, but needed to know, since he never said we were exclusive. Are you planning on getting relief from someone? Before I could ask, another text came in.

  Garrett: Only for you and I expect that you WILL wait for ME ONLY!!!

  Me: There’s no one but YOU!

  Garrett: Prove it, babe!

  Geez, how was I going to prove that I only wanted him? I thought for a moment and decided that two could play this game, but I would up the ante. Feeling a bit emboldened by his photo, I opened my top and pulled down the cups of my bra before taking a picture of my breasts and sending it to him. But, I decided to go one step further and hiked my skirt, taking a picture of the white lace thong he loved so much and hit send again.

  Instantly I received a response:

  Garrett: Mine – I NEED you!

  Me: YOURS – need you too – soon!

  Garrett: Count on it!! Need to go…miss me!

  Me: I already do!

  The rest of the afternoon had my sensual nerves on end. I knew there would be no immediate relief since he wasn’t due back for a few more days. But I could at least dream.

  I fell asleep, restless, letting my fantasies of Garrett consume me. My mind anticipated the dip in the bed, the heat of his body, the gentleness of his hands as they pulled away the sheets covering me and began placing caresses over my overheated skin. His knees slipped between me, forcing my legs apart as his lips began to stroke mine. I imagined fingers playing with my folds, trying to find entrance, when I suddenly was entered, causing my eyes to bolt open and a scream to escape my mouth.

  “Help! Get off of me, Chase! Please, leave me alone!” I thrashed about in the bed, trying to buck the shadowed figure off of me and felt the tears of fear slide down my face.

  Whatever had been inside me quickly exited and strong hands clamped down on my shoulders. “Laurel! Shhh! It’s me! It’s Garrett!”

  The voice sounded familiar. It was still too dark to see and suddenly the corner light was turned on by the switch by the door, with Grace yelling at the top of her lungs, “What the fuck is going on here?! Do I need to call the cops and beat this piece of shit to a pulp?”

  Her face was full of anxiety and fear, just as I imagine mine had been. My eyes regained focus and I saw Garrett’s startled face before me, dressed only in a pair of boxer shorts.

  His arms circled around my shoulders, drawing me tight into an embrace. “I’m sorry, Laurel. I didn’t mean to frighten you. I just couldn’t stay away any longer and wanted to surprise you.” He looked perplexed for a second before turning towards Grace. “Is she having nightmares again?”

  Grace gave him the once over. She looked none too pleased to being woken up in the middle of the night. “Since she isn’t throwing your ass out of bed, I take it you must be Garrett?” Only after he nodded did she confirm his suspicions. “She’s had nightmares ever since Chase attacked her. They seemed to have quieted since she met you, but started back about a week ago. I don’t know why, but that bastard’s determined to find her and that keeps her on edge.”

  He released me to crawl onto his side of the bed before hauling me back across his lap so he could hold me closer and soothe my fears. “It’s okay, Laurel,” he said softly. “I promise to never intentionally hurt you or allow any harm to come to you.”

  Grace walked over, touching my shoulder lightly. “Do you need anything?”

  I placed my hand on hers, giving it a squeeze and shaking my head.

  She turned towards the door. “I’m going to go back to bed and leave you two alone. If you need something, let me know.”

  It took a while, but Garrett waited patiently for my breathing to calm down and my tears to stop flowing. “I’m sorry, Laurel. God, baby, I’m so sorry. Had I known you were still having nightmares, I would’ve never approached you in bed like that. You never seemed to mind me waking you up to sex before and you responded like you were enjoying it.” His hands continued to rub up and down my spine in a soothing motion. “Has he tried to contact you?”

  I shook my head. “Thankfully, no. I’m sorry, too. In the past, I knew it was you that was in bed with me, so it didn’t alarm me. I didn’t expect you to be here tonight, so I was scared. I’ve been unnerved lately, feeling like I’m being followed and watched.”

  My breathing finally calmed down and I nuzzled into his chest, taking in his rich scent that heated my blood. He began placing slow tantalizing kisses along my shoulder and up to my ear. One of his hands slipped inside the top of my nightie to caress my breast while the other drew me closer to him around the waist.

  My mind and emotions were everywhere, but I needed to know. “What are you doing here?” I asked. “You aren’t due back for another couple days.”

  His kisses stopped long enough to answer. “I told you my bed was lonely.” His ministrations on my body continued as he admitted, “The last two stops were cance
led because the students already signed with a competitor.”

  Before I knew what hit me, he had my nightie off and was lowering me down onto his cock. We were nose to nose, my breasts rubbing hard against his chest as he continued to push into me.

  “Aah,” I cried out. “It’s so full this way.”

  He smiled against my lips. “I know. I want to fill every inch of you and this way I also have access to that lovely ass of yours.” His breath hitched and his arms tightened around my waist. “Fuck baby, you’re so tight. God, I’ve missed you.”

  By the time I was seated, I felt stretched beyond belief. He stilled for a moment and then started to move. The pace he set was relentless. I could feel myself start to build, but then felt the sharp smack to my cheek, followed by a gentle caress, which made me clench around him.

  “I knew you liked your ass smacked; I’d love to see it a nice shade of pink someday.”

  His words heated my blood, driving me even higher on the wave we were riding. His lips trailed kisses down my neck and then latched onto one of my breasts. Just as I was reaching the crest, he bit down on my nipple and pushed me into release. His mouth covered mine to catch my cry of passion as he continued to pump a few more times before finding his own release.

  Garrett collapsed back onto the bed, pulling me with him. He reached up to brush the hair out of my face. “I’m glad my traveling is done for at least a month or two. I sleep more soundly when you’re near me.”

  His words caught me off guard. I’d expected his return to be much like the others over the past few weeks, us fucking each other’s brains out and enjoying the friendship that had developed in the process. I’d been fighting my feelings for him, trying to rationalize that we couldn’t be anything more to one another. However, the truth was I didn’t have as many nightmares when he was sidled up against me in bed.

  When I didn’t say anything, he spoke up. “Did you want to talk about your nightmares?”

  I shook my head. I didn’t want to revisit anything. I only wanted to focus on him; on us.