Cecilia's Secret

by Patricia Gallinetti

  Eventually it was time to leave and Cecilia was at last taking an interest in things and she became excited.

  She realized she would miss dear Patrick, but she also felt sure this is what she needed and she thought maybe the time away with her Mother and Helena would improve her outlook on life.

  CHAPTER TWENTY-EIGHT

  Melbourne - 1947

  C ecilia was home at last, it had been eight years since she fled Australia, she hadn’t seen her little sister in all that time and was surprised how beautiful Helena was and being pregnant had also enhanced her beauty, she was glowing with health and happiness.

  It had been a difficult time for all of them. Helena was disappointed that Cecilia did not bring Catherine with, however, she realized that it was rather a long journey for the little one and she could see her next time.

  The Doctor informed Helena that he thought she was carrying twins and they were all eagerly waiting for the birth, which would be sometime in September

  Agnes and Archie were still living in the same house and Cecilia was given her old room, which suited her and it was heaven to have the room to herself, she would open the double doors onto her private balcony and as it was still quite warm she could leave the doors open at night. Ida had been given Helena’s old room and they would sit outside in the garden and reminisce about old times, good and bad.

  Nobody had seen or heard anything from Liam and Agnes wanted it to stay that way, she felt guilty because she hoped he was dead. She felt she could kill him herself. The family wouldn’t listen to Cecilia who partly blamed herself for his behaviour, she had given him a violent blow on his head maybe that had caused his seeming madness towards her.

  “Pshaw” exclaimed Agnes “Cecilia love, he was bad through and through even before you met him. He murdered that girl in Ireland and Bridget, I am sure of it and he would have killed you and your baby if you hadn’t left,” She breathed deeply. “He even went to South Africa after you for goodness sake, who knows what would have happened if you had gone there,” She frowned “You blame yourself for Bernard’s death too, my darling it wasn’t your fault, you had to get away from Liam,” she sighed. “Who knew there would be this terrible war?”

  Archie was there and he shrugged “Anyway,” he said, “The bounder has not been seen or heard of for years, here’s hoping he has disappeared for good.”

  They all agreed to change the subject and talk about happier times.

  Cecilia visited some of her old haunts and then decided to take a trip to see the old Cabaret. Mother had told her it was still in operation and very popular, the upstairs now a restaurant and the terrace extended to accommodate more tables. The gambling section was closed. When the war ended the downstairs was changed into a nightclub and the cabaret artists now performed on the same floor where the balls used to be held. It was all modernized, but still very popular and the name remained the same. Mother drove the girls to the club and Cecilia was impressed as mother was driving the Italian car Archie had given her for a wedding present. Agnes explained the car was as good as new as they had not used it much during the war. Cecilia was looking eagerly looking forward to seeing the club again. When they arrived the owner of the place recognized Agnes and very obligingly let them walk through and look around. They went upstairs - Cecilia was reluctant to walk out to the terrace, she had a vision of Bridget falling and landing on the roof of the car, but once she eventually steeled herself to accompany Mother and Ida, she found it was very different from that time and beautifully decorated.

  Looking down over the balcony she noticed that the cars were now accommodated in a roofed area which had been enlarged to take more vehicles. It was all changed and modernised, she didn’t notice a man standing below looking up, his ravaged face glaring up, his one eye flashing with hatred as she turned to walk inside he sneered and thought.

  I knew if I waited long enough, I would get my revenge. I am going to enjoy torturing the little bitch before I kill her.

  On the way home Cecilia was talking about the days when they were all involved in the Casino and Agnes laughed softly. “You know,” she said, “I miss those times; it was exciting and what about all the beautiful dresses?” Cecilia was silent as she thought of those hectic carefree times and her thoughts reverted to Liam, her eyes growing misty as she wondered what had happened to him? That night as Cecilia was getting into bed she sighed in contentment, it was a warm night and she had decided to leave the balcony doors open, there was a slight breeze and she could hear the cicadas chanting and she smiled as she heard a frog croak loudly.

  It’s so good to be home, I don’t want to go back, I want to stay here. But she had commitments, she didn’t want to hurt Patrick, he had been wonderful and patient and a lifeline and of course there was Catherine too. The next few days were quiet and Cecilia gradually relaxed, her health improved and she felt she would be more able to cope with life when she returned to South Africa.

  She was at home on her own and decided to write to Patrick and to Aunt Eloise, tell them all her news and reassure them she would be home once Helena had given birth. She was sitting downstairs in the study overlooking the street and looking up she put the pen in her mouth thinking what next to say, her gaze sharpened. It was Deja vu. Was that Liam? No, surely not, her family had informed her he hadn’t been seen for years. It was just because she was sitting in the same room the first time she had seen him after he had tried to kill her. She stood up and walked to the window and looked out, nobody there, just somebody passing by walking their dog. She chuckled. She was really getting neurotic, must pull herself together.

  That night when everybody was home she broached the subject.

  “Ummm,” she cleared her throat “I thought I saw Liam today, outside the study window in the street.” They all scoffed at her and said the same things she told herself.

  Archie said “Sweetheart, why should you see him now after all these years? He smiled and said, “He hasn’t been around for years, how would he know you are back?”

  They all laughed and reassured Cecilia and she put it from her mind. Although she did shiver slightly, was it just her imagination?

  There was so much to do and Cecilia was enjoying the holiday, she was feeling much better, she visited Helena as much as she could and they both laughed at the size of her, Cecilia said to her little sister affectionately.

  “You look like a hippo H. You still have a long time to go, how much bigger can you grow?” Helena slapped her playfully on the arm. The two of them were happy and contented to be back together. Helena confided, she had thought Cecilia was dead and she would never see her beloved sister again. She wanted to know what Patrick was like. Cecilia told her he was the kindest, most caring, thoughtful man and she was very lucky.

  Helena put her head on one side “But?” She said

  Cecilia shrugged “What do you mean, But?”

  Her sister said “There is something you are not telling me. You haven’t once said you love him. You can confide in me you know. I won’t breathe a thing to a soul.”

  Cecilia replied.

  “I don’t know H, I love Patrick, but not in love with him, maybe I have made a mistake marrying him, maybe I just can’t love anybody. And there is Catherine, she is such an adorable dear sweet beautiful little baby, but I just can’t love her, the way I loved Bernard.”

  Helena whispered “Oh Cecilia, I am so sorry. But maybe it’s just all the trauma of your terrible time in Italy. Maybe this holiday will be the best thing you have done.” She put her arms around Cecilia and hugged her “You’ll see, when you get back you will have changed and everything will be so much better,” she went on “You just need a complete rest and I promise you when the baby or babies,” she smiled putting her hand on her swollen tummy “when the babies are big enough to travel we will all come and visit you there,”

  She continued “You have said it is such a beautiful country and I am looking forward to seeing it.”

  Cecilia
received a letter from Patrick. She read. My Darling I miss you. When you get back you won’t recognize our little angel, she is growing in leaps and bounds and starting to talk, she never stops. He wrote. I notice from your letters you are enjoying being with the family and I am glad, you sound as if you are much improved. Love you.

  The time for Helena’s confinement was approaching fast and everybody was on tenterhooks, she was huge, would the birth be all smooth? So much could go wrong. The Doctor was watching her carefully as he was slightly worried about her heart which had received a bit of damage from the Rheumatic Fever.

  Helena gave birth to her little twin boys on the seventeenth of September and contrary to everybody’s fears, she had an easy labour and quick birth, the two boys were big for twins and very lusty. Everybody breathed a sigh of relief.

  Helena and Trevor decided to name them Thomas and Richard.

  Cecilia was happy for her sister, she knew now that she would have to start making plans to return to her family soon. She could only wait another month and then had to leave.

  Now that everybody was relaxed and not hanging around the house for news Cecilia decided she would go into town the next day to book her fare home, but she wanted to finish two tiny little cardigans she had knitted for the babies, she prepared to go out to the garden and sit on an old bench which had been there for years, it was under the old Oak tree, where she and Helena used to sit.

  She searched for Agnes’ small embroidery scissors, but she was unable find them, Agnes was busy doing her accounts in another room and Cecilia didn’t want to disturb her mother so she took the big kitchen scissors, she knew they were fairly sharp and she could use the tip to snip off the threads. Armed with the scissors and her sewing bag she walked out to the garden and sat under the huge tree in the shade to finish the little garments.

  She dozed off; it was such a peaceful day. Cecilia thought, thank God everything was alright now, the family had all been waiting anxiously for the babies to arrive, worried about Helena’s health. Cecilia felt that maybe she could be happy with Patrick and little Catherine now and she was eager to get home to South Africa to see them.

  She felt a sudden pain in her head and realized somebody had grabbed a bunch of her hair and was pulling at it savagely. Her eyes flew open.

  “Ouch,” she screamed “You’re hurting me.” She put up her hand to stop whoever it was, and then she heard a familiar evil chuckle. She swiveled her eyes up and found Liam looming over her. She tried to scream, but he clapped his hand over her mouth painfully.

  Liam held a knife to her face still holding onto her hair and she could feel the faint prick of the point on her cheek

  He leered down at her.

  “I’ve got you now, nobody around to save you, you little bitch, I have waited years for this. I am going to cut your face and then slice you open like a chicken,” he panted. “Then I am going to drag you up to the house and leave you to die on your doorstep,” he chuckled evilly, and put more pressure on the knife, with horror she could feel it cutting into her skin the blood flowing down her cheek. “Your Mother and Archie are going to love that, I am sure. They deserve the same treatment, but this way will be better,” he chuckled again, the spittle flying out of his mouth. “Their turn will come and I am going to have fun killing them too,” he was trembling with anticipation “Then- then your sister and her brats are going to get their turn.”

  Cecilia looked up at him, still clutching her bag, the scissors were inside the bag, she had been too afraid to grab them, but when this monster started to threaten her family especially the babies, she snapped and saw red. Cecilia darted her hand into the bag and instantly her trembling fingers closed around the scissors, yanking them out and holding them like a knife she stabbed, aiming for his groin, screeching he let go of her and reeled back, jumping up and hastily turning, she ran towards the house, maybe if she could get inside she could lock him out, sobbing and whimpering as she heard him gaining on her, she stumbled and fell painfully and screamed as he grabbed her by the shoulder, twisting her body and managing to slip away, her hands scrabbling in the grass and pushing herself up Cecilia realized she still had the scissors clutched in her hand and turning ran towards him catching him by surprise and stabbed him again and again.

  Cecilia couldn’t seem to stop. She was screaming at him.

  “You monster you have caused all my pain and suffering.”

  It was because of him her little boy had died, it was because of him she hadn’t seen her family for almost eight years. Now he was threatening them all again. Die! Die, you monster you deserve to die. She had a thought - KILL OR BE KILLED.

  CHAPTER TWENTY- NINE

  Melbourne - 1947

  “C ECILIA! CECILIA!” Somebody grabbed her around the waist and had pulled her away from the body on the ground.

  She came to her senses and looking down she saw Liam looking up, his one eye was staring, surprise stamped on his features forever

  ‘Hopefully he is dead at last.’ She thought. Everything went black and then she was looking up at Archie

  “Cecilia!” he was staring down at her with horror. “My God, Cecilia, my God.”

  She was sobbing and couldn’t answer.

  He helped her up and walked her towards the house, when they arrived Archie called, Agnes came out and noticed Cecilia’s dress and hands were covered in blood, she gasped in horror.

  “Oh,” she whispered, “What has happened, where she is hurt?”

  Archie answered, “She isn’t hurt, just a small cut on her cheek, but she has just killed Liam, with her scissors.”

  Agnes couldn’t believe what she was hearing.

  “Killed Liam? Where was she?” Archie sighed and said.

  “She must have been sitting at the bottom of the garden on the bench and the maniac accosted her, I noticed he was clutching a knife, but he didn’t have a chance,” He shook his head. “She stabbed him and went on stabbing him, I couldn’t get her to stop, and she had such strength,” he spoke again “I think she just snapped, after everything that has happened.” He exclaimed. “Agnes,” he said “Get her cleaned up and take her upstairs, I have to call the police. And the Doctor. It was clearly self-defense, but she’s not coherent now.” He continued. “It was this final attack of Liam’s that pushed her over the edge,” He once again shook his head in disbelief and muttered. “My God such strength.”

  The ordeal that Cecilia had to go through once more was horrific, but fortunately the police believed her and to her advantage the same dapper little man, Detective Inspector Holland who had investigated the case of Bridget’s death was in charge and he was sympathetic.

  Unfortunately, the events of New Year’s Eve 1936 were rehashed in the news and the part Cecilia had played although mostly the public sympathized with her.

  When she could tell them all that had transpired, Holland knew she was telling the truth, he had suspected Liam the first time and he knew that this was purely self-preservation.

  She managed to tell them how Liam threatened her family and the babies and this was the catalyst which drove her to such violence.

  When Cecilia had to give her version of the episode at the trial she almost collapsed, but because it was clearly self-defense. Cecilia was finally exonerated and she was free to go home to South Africa.

  Agnes sent Patrick a telegram and he was determined to fly to Australia to accompany Cecilia home. He knew she was not strong enough to travel alone. He also knew Liam of old through the stories Cecilia had told him and he didn’t blame Cecilia for killing the scum.

  ----------------------------------

  Annie sat quietly, with the others around her. They had been listening in silence and horror.

  “Oh Annie.” Denise put her hand to her mouth in horror “Cecilia, poor Cecilia, she attracted trouble wherever she went,” Denise went on “No wonder, she never ever spoke about it. I for one don’t blame her,”

  Vincenzo and Annie both nodded in agreem
ent.

  Vincenzo said, “Go on Annie, it must be nearly all told”

  Annie took a drink of water and sat silently for a while, the others appreciating her wish to keep still, her heart was aching for her great-grandmother, although these events had occurred over seventy years before.

  She could feel the horror Cecilia must have felt at taking the life of another human being, although it was justified.

  Annie looked around at her friends and asked. “Is it still recording?”

  Vincenzo glanced at the computer and nodded his head.

  He said. “Do you want to rest a while or do you want to finish Sweetheart?”

  Annie shook her head.

  “I want to finish this. It’s getting harder and harder to tell it but I must go on and then we can look for Bernard and bring him and Nana together at last.”

  She was desperately weary, the events as they unfolded, all seemed to be surreal and she hoped it wouldn’t upset Nan too much. But on the other hand, Nana would want to know everything.

  Cecilia and Patrick returned to South Africa. Cecilia had been persuaded by Patrick and the family that Liam’s behaviour was not because of her hitting him with the Champagne bottle, he had been accused of murder twice before that event and obviously he was not a stable character and he must have been on the edge of sanity for years. Patrick advised Cecilia to put it all behind her and he said she could now enjoy her life without the thought of Liam lurking in the background to terrorize her or her family. After this Cecilia did improve considerably and she enjoyed being with Catherine and watch the little girl grow.

  When Patrick passed away of cancer in 1963, Cecilia felt that she wanted to return to Australia. She had lost her rock and as Olga had also passed away the year before, there was nothing to hold her in South Africa.

  Cecilia and Catherine started their new life in Melbourne and when Catherine was nineteen, she met Paulo and they were married in 1966. Louisa was born in 1967 and Basil two years later. Cecilia was surprised how much she loved her two grand-children, especially Louisa and she often visited Catherine taking the children for outings. Eventually Cecilia felt she had to tell Catherine everything. She was feeling guilty that she hadn’t told her daughter about Bernard and his death and all her years in Tuscany.