by Pratibha Ray
Then Krishna had said, "These two are my favourite things. I give you this blue-sapphire ring as my blessing. It is my most precious ring. I have been wearing it personally. There is a special quality in it. On gazing at its centre concentratedly for some time many dilemmas are resolved."
Indicating the extremely lovely maid Maya, Govind said, "Since childhood she has been with me. She has always taken full note of my needs. She loves me so much that she cannot tolerate anyone else serving me. In case anyone bothers me, she is ever alert by my side. But, whoever stations her in his heart, she envelops him with her love to such an extent that nothing else is visible to him. This maid of mine, Maya, is as much the cause of grief as the remover of grief. Several tasks of mine are achieved through her. If she did not exist, it would have been difficult to resolve the many problems of Dvaraka, Hastinapur and these Pandavs. Arjun, despite being a younger brother, is also my priya sakha. As his wife, from today you are my priya sakhi. Hence my first gift to you is dear Maya."
I was grateful and said, "She has been with you for such a long time and is your helper in solving all your problems. How will you carry on your work if you give her away to me? Who will look after your needs and take care of you?"
In a grave voice Govind said, "We shall see. Your predicament is of greater significance at present than my problems. Now you have to live with five husbands. You will have to face new problems all the time. In solving them, Maya will surely be of help to you. That is why I am leaving her with you. Otherwise, you will be in difficulty. Troubled with the difficult responsibility of having five husbands, sometime or other you will want to become an ascetic and take to the forest. At that time who will stand as a barrier in your path?" Govind's soft smile left much unsaid. I forgot everything in that smile. Standing beside Maya, I kept gazing at him. I was grateful to Govind. My helplessness was truly known only to him. However much arrogance I might display outwardly, sakha Krishna could comprehend that I was cast into terrible danger because of five husbands. Though Nitambini was dearest to me among the sakhis, she was not as intelligent as Maya. That was why along with other gifts he had given Maya, to me.
But where would I go with so many gifts?
Sizing up the entire situation Father said, "As long as they wish, the five Pandavs and mother Kunti can live as guests in the Panchal kingdom. Glory will redound to Panchal by playing host to them." Father would feel even happier if that happened.
But how could I be pleased with this proposal? Where was my pride in this? In fact, my self-respect would suffer if that happened. I would feel that I was seeking sanctuary in my father's kingdom. For how long would it be tolerable to live as a dependent of my father and my brother? The kingdom which was mine till the day before, I would be a guest there now! Truly, how strange were the ways of society!
How long could one stay as a guest? The reputation of my husbands, too, would suffer. After some time people would start looking down on them. This was the way of the world. It was now my task to see to it that not even the hint of a slur was cast on my husbands in my father's kingdom. How could I tolerate it if it was otherwise? While living in my father's house, I had followed the daughter's dharma. Now the time had come for following the wife's dharma. My five husbands, having lost their kingdom, were poor and without a home. But there had not been any doubt regarding their valour, their heroism and character. Why should I not be proud of them?
Being wealthy may be a cause for prowess and fame, but acquiring wealth by unfair means cannot be termed manhood. The Kauravs, having deprived the Pandavs of their kingdom by unfair means, were now ruling over vast Hastinapur. But that did not mean that their prowess was greater than that of the Pandavs. Now the Kauravs were being condemned all over Aryavart. Bereft of wealth, the five Pandav brothers were the very souls of virtue. That was why throughout Aryavart their praises were being sung. Therefore, despite my not becoming a queen, there was no slur on my reputation. Truly, I was proud of my five husbands.
But it is one thing to be proud of one's husband's prowess and quite another to be happy with one's husband. Keeping the husband happy is an even more complicated task.
This was the problem before me. After the marriage ceremonies were over my actual married life was about to begin. It was easy to get married one by one to five husbands. But how complicated it was to live a married life successfully with them! I did not know how in the past someone had accepted seven husbands or eleven husbands for the sake of dharma. But at that time, in all of Aryavart, except me there was not a single woman married to more than one husband, let alone five husbands! Therefore, Aryavart waited with curiosity and amazement to watch the farce of my married life. I wondered if my life would ultimately turn into such a farce. At one time it was proper for me to accept the wish of everyone. I had never imagined that I would be shouldering such a huge responsibility in life. Then I had not thought that the desires, inclinations, hopes and personalities of five men would be so different from one another. Now, considering the entire matter, I felt utterly helpless.
Even if I devoted three hours of a night to one husband, that would mean one husband's night going fruitless. Then how was I to divide the night or divide myself?
The first day of my married life began. In the morning, having bathed and dressed as a new bride, I pranam-ed mother Kunti. Mother's blessing was, "Krishnaa, may God keep you happy! You have been able to fill my daughter's place. Make your husbands happy with all your heart and soul. Concentrating on their lotus feet, serve guests and visitors as if they were the Divine. I am blessed in having so learned a person as you as my daughter-in-law."
Having taken Mother's blessings, I proceeded towards Yudhishthir's bedroom. Krishna was there. Mother had directed that I should pranam him. Some unknown visitor was in Yudhishthir's bedroom. Their conversation could be heard. He was saying, "But Govind! what is the purpose behind your putting Devi Krishnaa into such a terrible predicament? In the abode of the gods everyone is waiting with eager and curious eyes to observe, the love, estrangement and conflict of Draupadi, the heroine of five men. Why did you thrust her into such shame? For the gods there is a custom of having many wives. This has enhanced the fame of their prowess. But have you given a thought to the shame and guilt suffered by a woman marrying many husbands? By this, womanhood is insulted. Does the lord of Dvaraka not know this?"
My feet turned to stone. I was listening to the tale of my shame and insult. Whoever the visitor might be I could not make up my mind to face him. I turned back towards the rest-room. Benumbed, I sat down on the bed. My reflection gleamed on the smooth marble of the walls. I felt that I was breaking down under the onslaught of grief, shame and anxiety. The very next moment within the new bride Krishnaa, Yajnaseni, born of the sacrificial flames, rose in revolt. She stood up in revolt against the laws of the abode of the gods, according to which one man might accept as many women as he wished, but if one woman married more than one husband she would be branded a sinner. Who had laid down this law? It must be some male god! Otherwise how could there be such a distinction of virtue and sin between male and female?
All the rituals and rules that had been created in society built around the distinction between rich-poor, high-low, brahmin-chandal, male-female, and such others, the profound inequities that had been set up based upon considerations of virtue and sin — against all of these a lifelong war would have to be waged.
Actually, the acceptance of five husbands was a challenge to the entire race of women. As though it were a golden opportunity for proving that even after marrying many men together, the pristine purity of a woman's character could remain unsullied.
If a woman confined to the inner chambers, having no opportunity to see the face of a man other than her husband, was faithful, some possibility of her chastity being in doubt remained. But even after having married many men if she could remain faithful to them then she could be called sati. Perhaps that was why, despite having more than one husband, Tara and Mandodari wer
e still satis who were saluted at every dawn. Lakshman's wife Urmila led the life of a prisoner for fourteen years in the inner apartments waiting for her husband. Yet, Ayodhya city did not resound with shouts of praise hailing sati Urmila. Devi Sita was abducted by Ravan and imprisoned in the Ashok forest. She lived there in the midst of the demon king Ravan and many demons, facing many lewd advances from them. Yet she spent her time single-mindedly waiting for her husband. Therefore, she could become famous as a sati. On the other hand, Urmila remained absent from public view.
What heroism is there in a man clinging on to values in circumstances where he has no alternative but to cling to them? True heroism lies in remaining steadfast in one's values in adverse circumstances. In this world of good and evil it is not possible to appreciate the goodness of virtue without sin. Without sin how can the fame of virtue be established?' If there is no adharma then how can dharma be established? Without darkness how shall we comprehend light? It was, after all, because of the wicked that God incarnated on this earth again and again. I thought it was sin that had made virtue so noble. It was because of the wicked that saints were considered great men. This was the difference between my thoughts and those of an ordinary princess.
When I saw or heard that in every king's royal apartments many queens, bedecking themselves, kept waiting for him, while, according to his whim, the king might or might not visit one queen's apartments, then I wondered how it would be if it were the other way about? One queen and a thousand kings! They would spend night after night waiting for her! He whom the queen loved best would be made the "Chief King" by her. Hearing my views the sakhis used to laugh, "Princess! Keep these thoughts to yourself. Do not open your mouth to anyone. People will cry shame! Everyone will say, the princess is surely unchaste if not physically, at least in thought. One woman accepting many men...what an impossible situation you are imagining!"
I would get angry, "Chaste woman! Unchaste woman! In the same way why don't the scriptures speak of chaste men and unchaste men? Are men's hearts made of gold that sin cannot tarnish them? Have the scriptures prescribed lists of sins only for women?"
Several scenes flashed before my eyes. The Yamuna in spate; while being ferried across the river the great sage Parashar, infatuated with the beauty and loveliness of the fisher-girl Matsyagandha, begged sexual favours of her. Despite repeated protests of adolescent Matsyagandha, the great sage Parashar forced himself upon her in that very boat.
Yamuna in spate! Passengers milling about on both shores. To keep his sexual exploit hidden from the travellers, Parashar, the possessor of-miraculous powers created in a trice a mist shrouding the boat all around. In that darkness the sage's lust was satisfied. Krishna Dvaipayan, gifted with supernatural prescience, was born. Taking the son with him, the great sage left after transforming by his blessing fish-odorous Matsyagandha into Yojangandha. The smell of fish disappeared from the body of Yojangandha Satyavati. She was filled with a fragrance that emanated from her for yojans.
This Yojangandha in the course of time went on to become the wife of King Shantanu of the Kuru dynasty. Satyavati had two children by Shantanu: Chitrangad and Vichitravirya.
The supremely wise mother, Satyavati, had to suffer the scorn and mockery of society sometimes because of her past. But Parashar? He was respected by all. Rebellion would swell within me as I listened to Lord Vyasdev's narrations of the story of his birth. My face would be red with anger. Vyasdev remained unmoved. He would laughingly say, "Woman is the all-suffering earth. How can her endurance be found in man? That is why it is easy to abuse women. If men were abused like this, then the earth would be filled with violence and only violence. Perhaps that is why none dares to abuse a man. Maintaining the firmness of her character in the midst of slander, censure and infamy, mother Satyavati is the living embodiment of a revered noble lady."
The svayamvar of the three daughters of the king of Kashi — Amba, Ambika and Ambalika was taking place. The news reached Devavrat, the son of Shantanu and Ganga. Bhishma's was an inviolable oath! Chitrangad had died unmarried, and Vichitravirya had become old enough to marry. Taking Vichitravirya with him, Bhishma went to the svayamvar of the Kashi princesses. Many kings of Aryavart were present there. Bhishma considered that the daughters of the king of Kashi were unlikely to garland Vichitravirya as their choice. Taking the excuse of kshatriya dharma, with the intention of marrying all the three princesses to Vichitravirya, he brought them away by force from the assembly hall. Afraid of the prowess of Bhishma, no one dared protest.
After arriving in Hastinapur, Amba bluntly told Bhishma that she was betrothed to Shalva, the king of Madra country, who had vowed to marry her long back. Seeing him in the svayamvar hall, she had lost her heart to him. According to dharma, her marriage ought to be with Shalva. Nobly, Bhishma sent princess Amba with the royal priest and trusted maids to her affianced husband with all honour. But faultless Amba was rejected by the narrow-minded king Shalva. What was her offence?
King Shalva mocked her — "Before everyone Bhishma defeated the kings and abducted you. From that very moment you became Bhishma's leavings. How, then, do you remain fit to become my wife? And now I no longer desire you."
What callous, cruel words! Amba was devastated. She explained to Shalva that Bhishmadev had vowed eternal chastity. Before his father he had vowed, "I shall never marry." No woman had ever been the cause of his deviating from his principles. What Bhishma did was not for himself but for the sake of his younger brother. For Amba, his mind was full of only the purest respect and good wishes untainted with any trace of lust or weakness.
But a woman becomes helpless before a man's egotism. Shalva had no concern for the future of Amba. He turned her down bluntly.
Princess Amba was without refuge. Entering the deep forest she sought advice from the hermits and sages. She did not feel it proper to return to her father's house. It was Bhishma whom she held responsible for her sad plight. For taking revenge she did the harshest penance. No hero of Aryavart stepped forward to ensure justice for her. Only the lord of the gods, Maheshvar, responded. But Bholanath did not give her the boon of vengeance on Bhishma in this birth. He granted her the boon in her next birth. That was when Amba would be able to defeat Bhishma. When would that time come? Before shelterless, slighted, scorned, Amba stretched a life of dilemma like the everflowing current of a river. How long could the adolescent princess live a lonely life only with Shiva's boon for sustenance? Losing patience, Amba immolated herself in fire.
In the next life, too, Amba's dilemma was equally great. As a woman how could she worst Bhishma? Though born of my father as a son, she was a hermaphrodite. Immediately after his birth king Drupad ordered that the new born infant be beheaded. Festivities for the birth of a son were not celebrated.
On seeing my brother, Shikhandi, the mind filled with anguish instead of pity. Through the delicate, refined loveliness of Shikhandi peered the slighted, scorned princess Amba. Without any offence on her part two of her births as a human became cursed. And only because she was a woman! Amba accepted all the injustices piled upon her by society. She immolated herself in fire. And I was born from fire to eradicate adharma and injustice from society. How could my heart not revolt against the self-sacrifice of Amba?
Giving up her life, Amba escaped from one female-birth. The two other sisters were left, Ambika and Ambalika. Their situation was even more grievous.
Vichitravirya died childless. The only dynast of Kuru lineage, Bhishma, was pledged not to marry. How would this lineage be preserved? Would the dynasty sink into oblivion? On the advice of mother Satyavati, for the preservation of the dynasty, Ambika and Ambalika were virtually forced to beget sons by other men. Narrating puranic precedents, Satyavati explained to them, "However much one may perform ascesis, without children the after-life is fruitless." Then, giving many examples she said, "If a woman cannot have a son by her husband, there are eight other methods by which she can beget a son. And this is accepted by society. Among these, one way
is begetting a son by another man. Hence, although Vyasdev is your elder brother-in-law, you have to accept him for preserving the royal lineage of Hastinapur." And so it was. By Vyasdev, Ambika and Ambalika had two sons: Dhritarashtra and Pandu. Dhritarashtra was blind and Pandu was sickly. Hence Satyavati requested Vyasdev to impregnate Ambika once more. From the very inception Ambika had opposed the begetting of sons in this fashion. Therefore, for again obtaining a son by Vyasdev she sent her royally adorned maid to him. By Vyasdev this maid gave birth to the exceptionally intelligent and righteous son Vidur. Ambika, afraid and anguished and ashamed of her impregnation, drowned herself in the Yamuna. Yet, Ambika and Ambalika had to bear the brunt of mockery on several occasions. For having becoming pregnant by another man they had to suffer social odium. When Kunti, bowing to her husband's commands, gave birth to sons by various gods, she, too, was insulted several times because of this. Thinking over all these incidents it seemed that if the standards of virtue and sin had been identical for women and men, the female race would not have been oppressed by social tyranny. In the course of discussions with my companions I would often blurt out, "If the need should arise, I too, accepting more than one husband can show that despite having more than one husband a woman can be trustworthy, obedient and chaste." Although I had not thought over the matter that deeply, I would blurt it out under the stress of emotion and then it became a habit to speak thus in anger.