by G E Griffin
“Truth of the matter is, Caleb, Faith has always had a stubborn streak a mile wide, so whatever our misgivings may be, I have little doubt that she’ll go right ahead and do whatever she wants,” Phil smiled as he patted my shoulder. “And by bringing you here tonight, she’s telling us loud and clear that you are someone important to her. But let me tell you this, Caleb,” Phil moved closer as he gripped my shoulder and spoke in a quiet voice. “I’ll be keeping a very close eye on things, and you’d better follow through on your fine words, or you’ll have me to answer to, no matter how far away you may be.”
I had to admit I was pretty taken aback by Phil’s attitude, but you know what? I respected him for it. He was just being protective and looking out for his daughter, and in my book, that’s how any decent father should act, and exactly how I'd be towards any future daughter of mine.
“Phil, you have my word that I’ll be doing everything in my power to make sure you have no cause for concern,” I assured him.
“Glad to hear it.” He stared hard at me, before we noticed Faith approaching.
“Everything alright, Dad?” she frowned as she walked up, slipping her hand in mine and giving it a quick squeeze, seeming to have picked up on the tension between her dad and me.
“Everything’s fine my dear. Caleb and I were just having a little chat to get to know each other a little better,” her father smiled. “And now I think we’ve got a few things clear. Isn’t that right, Caleb?”
“Absolutely,” I smiled back, as I slipped my arm around Faith’s waist, and kissed the top of her head.
Chapter 17 - Faith
The last thing I wanted was for anyone to be able to accuse me of using Caleb as a meal ticket. Even though the thought of relocating to the other side of the world was undeniably scary, I still wanted to keep my independence. I despised the way his ex-wife had sucked every penny she could out of him, and I was determined that any relationship between us would not entail me relying on him financially in any way whatsoever.
That meant I would not be moving in with Caleb. I would be having my own place, especially as rental costs would be covered by the bank for the first six months in any case.
“I don't see why you don't just move in with me; surely you can see that makes more sense?” Caleb argued, as we sat together at the kitchen table in my flat discussing our plans before his return.
“Moving stateside is already a huge step for me, and I think we’ll both need our own space to escape to sometimes,” I pointed out. “And what would your family think if I moved straight in with you, when they’ve never even met me or heard about me?”
“They have heard about you actually, and they’re really looking forward to meeting you.”
I quirked an eyebrow, as this was news to me.
“Oh? How come?”
“My brother Seth quickly figured out something was up after you ran out on me. We’ve always been real close, so it didn't take him long to weasel out of me that I’d met someone kinda special, and after I’d filled him in about you, of course he had to go and let it drop to the rest of my family. Then he practically frog-marched me to the airport to get myself over to London, ordering me not to return until I’d talked some sense into you. So, you can maybe imagine that Seth’s pretty keen on meeting you, as is the rest of my family, Mom especially.”
“So you're saying they already know about us?” I was taken aback that he’d already discussed this with his family.
“Sure. I told you – from now on, I want everything about us out in the open, nothing hidden or furtive, no room for any kind of misunderstandings. Total transparency - that has to be the basis of our relationship. You don’t have any kind of a problem with that, do you?” Caleb shot a piercing look my way.
“No, of course not,” I assured him, having seen the way a black cloud descended over him whenever he was reminded of the way Cassie had cheated on him.
I had to remember that Caleb was damaged goods too, even if he covered it up so much better than I did. I felt a wave of protectiveness wash over me for this vulnerable man who, on first appearances, seemed so outwardly confident and assured, but who actually found it hard to trust anyone not to hurt him again. It helped me to believe that maybe he did need someone like me to help him resolve his trust issues. I could see now that it hadn’t done him any good spending so much time with the shallow, arm candy type of women he’d chosen to hook up with after his divorce, the type that flitted so easily from man to man.
So maybe I was the one who could help him nurse his damaged heart back to health. It would do us both good if I concentrated on helping him learn how to trust again, rather than just selfishly wallowing in my own self pity and grief.
I slid over to sit on his lap, took hold of his hand, and held it over my heart. I looked right into his amber eyes, where I could still see the lingering shadows left by the pain of betrayal.
“Caleb, I promise you, hand on heart, that I will never cheat on you, I will never lie to you, I will always be totally honest and I will always tell you the absolute truth,” I vowed. “And I promise to give things between us my very best shot. I just hope it’s going to be enough, because it’s all that I can offer you.”
Caleb closed his eyes and swallowed hard, as he leant his forehead against mine, and snaked his arm around my waist to pull me closer to him.
“That’s more than enough, Faith. You have no idea what your words mean to me,” he murmured.
“We’ll be there for each other, because that’s how it’ll work, Caleb. Having to be strong for each other will be what binds us together.”
***
After just a few short weeks, I couldn’t quite believe how easily I’d settled in California. Okay, so I had to get used to all the weird little differences between America and England.
Such as using a rest room, rather than going to the loo. Or having a trash can rather than a rubbish bin. Or calling herbs ‘erbs’, for some inexplicable reason. Or referring to trousers as ‘pants’ - that certainly made me snigger a few times. And why on earth having a fringe in your hair was called having ‘bangs’ was totally beyond me.
But there you have it; I was going through the whole ‘two nations divided by a common language’ thing.
It was no big deal though, and I was sure I could adapt. I could get used to ordering a beverage rather than a drink, turning on a faucet rather than a tap, getting in line rather than queuing, and wearing panties rather than knickers.
None of that mattered, because Caleb had been absolutely right. Relocating had provided me with exactly the fresh start I needed, especially as my new job was actually pretty awesome, and I was really enjoying all the new challenges it was throwing up. It gave me a real buzz to be considered the undisputed expert on all things Royal London, to have carte blanche to organise things however I saw fit, with whatever resources I needed, just as long as I ensured things ran smoothly for our customers.
I was so busy I didn't really have time to miss my family, and anyway we chatted via email, Skype and WhatsApp virtually every day. Harry had stopped over a few times, because she got herself scheduled on the San Francisco flights whenever possible. So she was able to see for herself that I genuinely had settled in very well and could put everyone’s mind at rest that I was doing just fine.
I didn't even have to worry about Stan, because Mum had taken my cat back to live with them out in Hampshire, and she assured me that my beloved moggy was having a whale of a time exploring their house and garden, bringing in all sorts of ‘presents’ for them in the shape of mice and frogs.
I didn’t see Caleb much at work as he’d moved on to his next project, but I knew I could call on him if I ever needed his professional support or advice. We weren’t exactly keeping it secret that we were seeing each other, but neither were we flaunting it either. And to start with, probably because we seemed such an unlikely couple, nobody really cottoned on about us, and that suited us both just fine.
But
then, inevitably word got around about us being an item, and that’s when I started getting the stink eye from a couple of the girls at the office. It didn't really surprise me, and I'm sure there were jealous whisperings along the lines of ‘What’s so special about her?’ and ‘What on earth does a guy like Caleb see in someone like Faith?’ I managed to shrug it off, resigning myself to the fact that there were bitches the world over. I’d been used to dealing with their sort ever since my school days, so I knew it was best to just ignore them. At the end of the day, I was the one who got to be with Caleb, not them, so I just put my head down at work and got on with doing my job.
Then pictures suddenly started popping up on various social media sites, pictures that appeared to show that Caleb was seeing Vanessa Armstrong - Cassie’s sister - behind my back. It was Shaniece, one of the girls at the office who’d been giving me these black looks, who decided that I ‘ought to know’ about some things she’d seen on Facebook and Instagram. This frenemy asked if she could have a quiet word, then stood there gloating as she showed me pictures of Caleb with Vanessa, a decidedly smug look on her face as she waited for me to kick off.
But I didn't give her the satisfaction. Due to Caleb’s insistence on total openness and honesty between us, I knew these pictures weren’t what they seemed. Caleb had told me straight away the first time Vanessa had ‘just happened’ to be out running at the same time and in the same place as him. He’d also told me each and every time afterwards that Vanessa had bumped into him ‘by accident’ at various places, and we’d both come to the same conclusion: that she appeared to be making some kind of a play for him.
“Naturally, I haven’t wanted to be rude to Vanessa, and it’s kind of hard to shake someone off when they come up to you in public like that. I just wish my stupid brother hadn't encouraged her by telling her she ought to get in touch with me when he saw her a while back, but in his defence, at the time he didn't know anything about me and you. But you do know I’m not interested in Vanessa in any way whatsoever, don't you, Faith? You do believe that I would never cheat on you behind your back like that?” A worried expression clouded Caleb’s face.
“Yeah, of course I believe you,” I assured him, knowing his very strong stance on the whole issue of cheating, and trusting that if he wanted out, he’d at least have the guts to tell me to my face. Sneaking around behind my back was absolutely not Caleb’s style. “But if you think maybe Vanessa’s developing some kind of stalker issues, perhaps you should warn her off, nip this in the bud before it gets out of hand,” I suggested, feeling very uncomfortable at the way Cassie’s sister seemed to be trying to foist herself into our lives.
“Well, if Vanessa ‘just happens’ to bump into me again, I’ll tell her to back the fuck off this time, in no uncertain terms,” Caleb stated firmly. “This can't go on, so although I don't usually blab to anyone about my private life, I’m going to fill her in all about you and me, so she’ll get the message that there is no way in hell I’d ever be interested in starting anything up with her.”
So when these pictures were shoved under my nose in an attempt to provoke a reaction, I knew that Vanessa had just upped her game. Bring it on.
“Oh dear, the lengths some people will go to,” I sighed, putting on my best British Ice Queen persona as I shook my head and smiled. “I’ve known for some time that Vanessa had a crush on Caleb. The silly girl’s been following him around, making a dreadful nuisance of herself, even though he’s told her he’s not interested, and tried his best to let her down gently.”
“Oh, really?” Shaniece raised her eye brows in surprise. “I just assumed… well, you gotta admit they do look kinda cosy in these pictures.”
Vanessa smiling at Caleb while they were out running together. Vanessa laughing with Caleb in the coffee shop. Vanessa looking up adoringly at Caleb as they walked along together.
“At first glance maybe, but I suggest you take a closer look at Caleb’s expression. Doesn’t exactly look thrilled to be with Vanessa, does he?” I calmly pointed out, glad that Caleb had mentioned how obsessed Vanessa had been about taking selfies with him, which explained these pictures, and had no doubt all been part of her cunning plan. However, it had just backfired on her big time, because she hadn't been able to manipulate his expression to match her apparently loved up one.
Caleb frowning at Vanessa. Caleb scowling at Vanessa. Caleb looking downright bloody furious as he turned away from her.
Even if I hadn't believed him before about not being interested in Vanessa, then as far as I was concerned, these photos were all the evidence I needed to prove that he was being truthful. Not the outcome Vanessa had been anticipating, I’m sure.
My guess was that when Vanessa had somehow heard through the grapevine about Caleb being involved with me, she’d decided to try and stir things up to make trouble between us, clearing the way for her to then step in and snap him up. Well guess what - not happening, lady.
“Yeah, I guess you have a point,” Shaniece reluctantly conceded as she studied the pictures. “I suppose Caleb does look kinda pissed off.”
“Okay, so was there anything else you wanted to see me about, Shaniece? How are those end of quarter reports coming along,” I asked, making it plain that I now considered the subject of these wretched pictures closed.
When I told Caleb what had transpired, he was furious and wanted to go and have it out with Vanessa.
“I’m going to tell her this has to stop right now. Vanessa’s crossed a line, and I'm not happy with you having to deal with this kind of thing at the office,” he’d fumed.
“It’s no big deal, I can handle it. I can see what she’s up to, trying to make trouble, force a wedge between us, but we’re not going to let her succeed, are we? Let’s put up a consolidated front. Maybe invite her over for a drink so she can see us together,” I suggested, refusing to feel intimidated by Cassie’s sister.
“No way. I really don't want us to have anything to do with her, Faith. Seeing Vanessa just brings back all kinds of bad memories,” Caleb insisted. “But don’t worry, I’m going to deal with this right now.”
Straight away he called Vanessa, putting his phone on speaker so I could listen in. I heard him calmly telling her that he did not appreciate pictures of him being circulated on social media without his permission.
“Oh I am so sorry Caleb, especially if it’s caused any trouble with your latest lady friend,” she gushed. “I have no idea how on earth this has happened. I guess someone must have jumped to conclusions, you know, put two and two together when they saw us out together and thought we were a couple.”
“Faith isn’t just my ‘latest lady friend’ as you put it. Faith’s my partner, and she wasn’t upset, she thought it was pretty funny actually. You see, after everything I went through with your lying, cheating sister, Faith knows I’d never cheat on her. Never. Not in a million years. So, for anyone to imply that’s the kind of lowlife guy I am, well it’s downright disrespectful and shows how little they know me, doesn’t it?”
“Yes, of course…I… just… I never meant…” Vanessa stuttered.
“So I’d really appreciate you getting those pictures taken down, and making it clear to everyone that there is nothing going on between us, and that there will never be anything going on between us. Ever. Do I make myself crystal clear, Vanessa?”
“Yes, Caleb,” she whispered.
“Good. I trust that’s an end to the matter. Have a nice life Vanessa, but leave me out of it.”
And with that he hung up, and we didn't hear any more from her, thank the lord.
***
Although I’d stuck to my guns about having my own place, in reality most of the time either Caleb stayed over at mine, or I stayed at his, just because we really enjoyed being together, even if we just sat and worked at our laptops in companionable silence, ordering a take out if neither of us fancied cooking, rather than eating out somewhere.
Caleb had helped me pick out an apartment tha
t wasn’t far from his place, and I think he really appreciated the fact that I’d given him his own set of keys, and never minded if he dropped in unannounced. I also made it plain that I had no problem whatsoever with him seeing anything on my laptop, phone or any other device I had at my disposal. Didn't worry me, as I had nothing to hide, and I was happy to do whatever it took to help him get over any insecurities Cassie’s betrayal had left him with.
This fresh start Caleb had engineered for me meant I was finally casting aside the heavy cloak of unhappiness that I’d been trailing along with me ever since Drew had died, dragging me down with its weight of grief and sorrow.
Thanks to Caleb’s persistence in persuading me to relocate, I no longer had anyone watching and waiting for me to crumble or disintegrate with grief, and it made me realise that sometimes you find yourself matching people’s low expectations of your ability to cope, until eventually it becomes ingrained behaviour that gets harder to break the longer it goes on.
By breaking away, that expectation had been erased.
Of course I hadn't forgotten Drew. I never would, it just wasn’t possible. I carried him in my heart at all times, and would until my dying day. But I was discovering that your heart can expand and grow to absorb new loves, while still cherishing the old; that you didn't have to discard the past to accommodate the present, and move on into the future.