Almost Lost, Never Forgotten

by T. L. Sieving

  “What are you sorry about Sam?” I ask her.

  “The lunatic Lucy!” she screams at me. “That lunatic was stalking you because of ME…because of me!” she looks down and starts crying.

  “Oh Sam, I don’t blame you at all,” I say but she doesn’t stop crying. I grab both of her shoulders and this startles her enough to look up at me and I very firmly tell her, “Listen to me Sam; this is Not. Your. Fault. Ok?!”

  I repeat, “This is not your fault,” over and over to her until I finally see it accepted on her face and I hold her tightly in my arms the rest of the way home.

  When we finally pull up to our townhome we’re done crying and I look at her and sternly tell her, “Samantha Renault, don’t you ever pull this shit on me again.” I smile at her so she knows I’m not really yelling at her, but I do want her to know how hard the morning snub was on me.

  “Really Sam, we will get through anything, that’s what sisters do.”

  Those words sink in and she smiles at me. “Sisters,” she agrees and we hug again.

  “James, I’m going to run in quickly and I’ll be right back,” she tells him and we both head inside. I stay downstairs and wait for her to come back, giving her time to get it together.

  After a few minutes she finally comes down. “I’m so sorry Lucy; I should never have walked out on you this morning. I was walking my parents out and all the sudden this guilt over what this family has done to you got to me.”

  “How do you know that I didn’t catch the young Travolt’s eye on my own?” I say firmly. I’m not making light of what has happened but we don’t know why this maniac had his eyes on us. I’m sure the father/son pair is connected, but we don’t know for sure and Sam shouldn’t carry any guilt with her.

  She smiles at me, “You are right Lucy, you are quite gorgeous.”

  I smile at her, “Damn straight!”

  “I love you Sam,” I tell her as I give her one last hug.

  “I love you too, Lucy.”

  I take a deep breath as she walks out the door. I walk outside and watch James pull out and head down the street with my best friend.

  I lock the doors and set the alarm. Just because one crazy is off the street tonight doesn’t mean the next one isn’t ready to take over. I’ll forever be more careful now that I’ve experienced something like this.

  I decide to push myself and get ready for a ten mile run. I haven’t done more than six or seven miles lately and I can channel some of this stress and anxiety into a run.

  I’m totally beat and have no idea how I ran ten miles. At eight I thought I was going to pass out but after I got over that hump I could have kept running forever; I think ten is my new goal to run every day. I take a quick shower and change.

  I walk down the stairs toward the kitchen to get something to eat as the doorbell rings. I look in our video monitor and see Chase standing there, so I invite him in.

  “You brought Chinese!” I say with a smile. Chinese sounds perfect.

  “A little birdie told me this would be a good choice for dinner,” he tells me as he walks with me into the kitchen.

  We make small talk over dinner. The plan is to leave tomorrow to head to Kansas City for three nights and then to Detroit.

  Once I have the kitchen cleaned up I walk into the livingroom and sit in my usual spot curled up in the left corner of the couch. Chase comes in and sits down on the other side and we silently watch ESPN.

  “How was your day?” I ask him and all he replies is, “Huh?” I laugh because I know he’s engrossed in the show.

  “What?” he asks.

  “Oh nothing,” I say and turn back toward the TV. He mutes the TV and asks me again, “I just asked how your day was that’s all.”

  “Sorry Lucy, I’m not used to anyone watching ESPN with me.”

  I frown and remember that he’s here for me but I’m messing up his normal routine. I’ll be as quiet as possible.

  “Get out of that head of yours; it’s nice to have someone ask me about my day.”

  I look up at him shyly, well ok then.

  “My day was pretty great and I can’t wait for you to see some of the highlights I’m sure they will show.”

  “I’m so bummed I missed the game; luckily that’ll be the last one I miss for awhile,” I say and give him a big smile.

  We talk throughout the show and he’s right, he had a hell of a game. He’s on a streak and it’s no wonder his team is currently in first place.

  I usually turn the TV off as soon as the gossip starts but Chase leaves it on so I sit through it. I’m staring at the screen as they show pictures of me and Chase and discuss a budding romance between us.

  I’m leaning forward shocked at this and I turn toward Chase not sure if he’s going to be mad or what. He’s staring at me with a smirk.

  “First time you’ve seen this huh?” he asks me, mocking me a little.

  “Um yeah,” I say and throw my pillow at his face. He laughs as he catches it.

  “Oh, this is actually some of the nicer stuff they say.”

  “Ahh, cut it out Chase, I don’t watch it, listen to it, or read it and I don’t want to know,” I tell him.

  You need to close yourself out of a lot of it, but you should keep up to date on how we’ve been dating and who else I’ve been dating.”

  I know he’s making fun of the gossip, but something hits me and I’m not joking when I say, “Yeah, no thanks.”

  He doesn’t say anything else, but he un-mutes the TV and we continue watching and not speaking. I sit through the gossip of how closely I’ll be working with the Mustangs and how they think it’s because of Chase that I chose this team out of the eight who requested me.

  There’s a highly anticipated interview coming out with new host Luciana Stevens, teams and players alike are going on about how easy it was to work with her. They are raving at her intellect and knowledge of the game and easy-going persona, but no one is saying just how easy on the eyes she clearly is.

  Easy on the eyes is an understatement, just look at her. It’s no wonder you have hunks like Chase and Jasper fighting over her.

  “What the hell? This is what they’re saying?” I ask him. They have been showing pictures of me in formal clothes, business attire, and casualwear; they apparently have a shit-ton of pictures of me. I was surprised to see the picture of Jax and me at the restaurant the night I was roofied and pictures of Chase and me in Miami and New York.

  I look at Chase and he’s still looking at the TV, “Oh,” oops I said that out loud. “I’m sorry I brought on this kind of gossip about you.”

  He looks at me with a straight face and he looks mad. “Lucy, I’m not embarrassed by you.”

  “I’m not embarrassed that they’re saying this about you Chase, I’m sorry that they’re making this into a story.”

  He doesn’t look convinced and then it hits me.

  “Chase you can’t be serious! When I said, ‘yeah no thanks’ about keeping up to date on who you are dating I meant I really don’t want to watch you kissing other girls or see who you go out with, not that I care if they say we are together.”

  I can’t believe I had to admit that to him but I obviously pissed him off and had to clear it up.

  Part 3

  Never Forgotten

  Chapter 38

  The first week went better than I could’ve ever expected. I absolutely love my new job and I’ve had a lot of fun spending the week with Chase and some of the other players on the team.

  The more time I spend with Chase the more I wonder what ever went wrong in our relationship. Granted we were young, but I just don’t remember what scared me.

  I find myself just staring at him and thinking of all the years and memories we’ve had. I find myself spending the same amount of time at night alone in my bed wondering why I left.

  The network and my boss seem very pleased with my work so far and my boss is planning on coming to a game in the next week or so. It’s nice to
be getting such good feedback on my performance since this is so new.

  The players have been great, not only on the Detroit team but the other teams as well. I make sure I’m well versed on both teams and players before every game which has been easy enough since I was so involved in baseball before this.

  I talk to Sam only once a week but she seems to be doing well. She has complained about the long days but she really loves it and absolutely adores Italy. The first week we played phone tag for a couple days so we decided to make every Wednesday at 11pm EST our phone call time. It’s not the same without her, but I’m happy we’re both doing something we love.

  We’re in Detroit tonight and I’m meeting some of the teammates for drinks. It’s kind of been a regular thing and I’m enjoying getting to know everyone.

  I’m sitting at a table replying to a work email when my eyes catch him and I’m transfixed for a moment. He looks hot as hell walking in with his low hanging jeans, a tight fitting Mustangs t-shirt, and hat. He’s tall at about 6’2, but he’s also remarkably built. He has shaggy brownish blondish hair that hangs tussled enough so that you want to run your hands through it, but when he has a baseball cap on like tonight and it’s hanging down, it just looks so attractive.

  He looks so defined. His chiseled chin sets his face apart especially with the smirk he has on it when he walked in. I guarantee all the ladies are ready to throw their panties at him. He has these distinct cheekbones, flawless skin, and fierce blue eyes that make my breath catch for a minute as I look at him. I don’t know why it feels like this is the first time I’m really seeing this adult version of Chase.

  He’s smiling and laughing at someone behind him and I see a few more guys from the team… and her.

  Chase is with the girl that I saw him kiss in New York the first day I saw him for our failed interview attempt. She’s also the girl who intercepted my phone call to him when I needed some help during one of my anxiety attacks.

  This is the first time I’ll be meeting her and seeing Chase interacting with a girlfriend. Well, he said she’s not his girlfriend, but whatever. I don’t know if I’m ready for this, but hell, I don’t know if I’ll ever be ready for this.

  I bite my lower lip and freak out a little. Not the anxiety type of freak out, thankfully I think I’m controlling that a little better, but a girly freak out.

  It suddenly dawns on me that I don’t have any girlfriends. Sam and Ana are both in Europe and I’m always surrounded by boys. I grab my phone and text Sam, it’s not our normal time to chat but I hope she’s available.

  Chase comes over and says hi to me and ‘she’ follows him.

  “Aren’t you going to introduce us?” she asks Chase.

  “Sure,” Chase says, “Arianna meet Lucy, Lucy this is Arianna.”

  “Hi Arianna, nice to meet you,” I say to her, she smiles at me and says the same. She looks nice enough but she’s sticking on Chase like glue which makes me a little uncomfortable.

  “Lucy, can I talk to you a minute?” Chase asks me.

  “Yeah sure,” I say and grab my drink before standing up to follow him. I stop and turn around to grab my purse, I never leave anything behind me now, and I see Arianna giving me the death stare.

  I quickly turn around and follow Chase. “Are you ok?” He asks me.

  He’s constantly asking me this, but he never pulls me away to ask in private.

  “Yeah, why do you ask?”

  “You are white-as-a-ghost, Luciana, and I happen to know you have a nice tan,” he jokes.

  “Oh, yeah well, I guess I’m just tired. Maybe I’ll finish this drink and head back to get a good night’s sleep.”

  He’s looking at me with concern in his eyes, “Ok, I’ll drive you home.”

  “Oh don’t be silly, I can call Dan and have him pick me up.”

  Dan is my new driver for when I’m in Michigan. The Renaults have been driving me a little crazy with security and I’ve assured them over and over again that I have the team’s security, but they insist on having a driver everywhere I go. They have my schedule and always have everything set up for me.

  Chase smirks and I can’t help but smile at him when he gives me that sexy look. He leans in and whispers, “I told Dan I would take you home.”

  He didn’t need to lean into me to say that, I can hear him just fine. I think he’s flirting with me and I’m thrown off a little by it, but I like it. A lot.

  I lean in and whisper in his ear, “Well ok then.”

  I’m so close to him that I feel his cheek rise into a smile. I slowly move and purposely make sure that our faces touch when I pull back. My stomach drops and all the old feelings rush back, like they were never forgotten.

  I’ve barely had any of my drink but I don’t want it anymore. I set it down and let Chase know I’m going to go to the bathroom and I’ll be right back and ready to leave.

  I’m washing my hands and putting some more lip gloss on when Arianna walks in.

  “It’s so nice to finally meet you, Lucy, Chase has told me so much about you.”

  I smile at her, not quite sure what her agenda is. I can’t say I’ve heard anything about her because that would be a lie.

  She walks right up to the other sink and starts to wash her hands.

  “I’ve been pretty understanding of Chase feeling like he needed to help you, but I think it’s time you found someone else to help you; my boyfriend wants to spend time with me, ok?” she says with pride in her eyes.

  I put the lip gloss back in my purse and head to the door. I seriously doubt that Chase has told her anything about me and I’m not about to fight in the ladies room over a man that neither one of us is dating. I walk out without saying a word.

  I walk straight over to Chase and he asks me if I’m ready, I say yes and he puts his arm around me and walks me out into the hot and humid Michigan summer night.

  I remember all the summer nights we spent laying on blankets looking up at the stars talking about our future plans. I try not to think of those memories and keep myself in the present. Chase and I have both changed and we aren’t those two kids anymore.

  He keeps his arm around me as we walk through the parking lot to his Range Rover. We don’t normally walk like this and I can’t help but feel like something is changing.

  “Are you hungry?” Chase asks me.

  Ok it has been way too long since I’ve had sex because that is what my mind is on. Yes, I’m hungry, but not for food. That is probably why I’m thinking everything he says and does is flirting; I’m horny.

  “Earth to Luciana! Can I take you to dinner?” he asks me as he squeezes me into his body. I can feel his chest through his shirt; I seriously need to get my mind out of the gutter.

  “Yes,” I purr and am instantly embarrassed that leaning into his body is doing this to me.

  “Ok, I’m taking you to dinner,” he says with a laugh, obviously enjoying what he’s doing to me. He pulls me tighter into him and I wrap my arm around his waist.

  He opens the passenger door for me and lifts me into his car, “Thanks,” I laugh. I could’ve gotten in myself, but it was nice of him to help.

  “My pleasure,” he says as he shuts my door and heads over to the driver’s side.

  We pull out of the parking lot and Chase asks me where I want to go. I tell him to choose, I’m open to anything. As we drive down the road we’re both silent until he simply tells me, “I saw Arianna walk into the bathroom right after you.”

  He didn’t ask a question, he simply tells me that so I look at him, smile, and look back at the road in front of us.

  He laughs at me before being more direct; “Did she say anything that bothered you?”

  “No, nothing she said bothered me at all,” I say and I mean it. Arianna obviously likes Chase and they may or may not be having sex but he doesn’t owe me any explanations.

  We pull into a Mongolian BBQ restaurant and I instantly recognize it; we went here on our first real date. Well at leas
t we always called it that, it was the dinner before our first homecoming dance freshman year of high school.

  “Is this ok?” he asks as he turns the car off.

  “Yeah this is perfect,” I say as I reach for my door handle. Chase is at my door as soon as I get out, closes it for me and grabs my hand.

  It’s not like I’m not used to a gentleman, Jax was most definitely a gentleman. There’s something different about what Chase is doing or at least how he does it. It’s almost as if Jax was always doing it in a form of protection, but Chase is doing it as a way to show me we’re on a date.

  Our fingers entwine with each other’s as we walk toward the restaurant. He looks at me and smiles. He opens the door but doesn’t drop my hand as we walk toward the hostess stand. It’s late for dinner, almost 9pm, so they aren’t that busy and we’re seated right away.

  I fill my bowl really full, and everything looks so good. I take my first bite and moan with appreciation.

  “You like it?” Chase asks me and I shake my head up and down as I chew my food.

  We make small talk throughout dinner and a few people come up to say hi to Chase but other than that we’re left alone.

  When we’re done Chase pays the bill and grabs my hand again and walks out. Instead of walking back to the car we start walking down the street. We’re downtown Ann Arbor and Main Street is just the way I remember it.

  The streets are lined with café’s and one-of-a-kind stores. People are eating at the sidewalk cafés and enjoying drinks with friends and the scene is such a nice reminder of home.

  We walk through the streets making our way to a bench. We pass bars and restaurants that surround the area and I wonder what kind of memories we would have made together here.

  We sit down and Chase asks, “Lucy, can I ask you something?”

  “Of course,” I tell him as I lean back and put my leg up on the bench under my butt so I’m facing him.

  “Do you still have feelings for Jax?” he asks me and I take time to watch him as I’m considering if I do.

  “Just friends feelings… I think,” I tell him. I hope that doesn’t confuse him that I added an ‘I think.’ I don’t miss Jax like I used to miss him when we were dating. Something snapped in me when I found out that he used to date Sam. I felt like I was betraying the girl-code and my feelings changed for him. They had probably been changing for awhile but I don’t think of that.