Hawaii Five Uh-Oh

by Z. A. Maxfield

  “Oh, that’s right,” Ortiz sneered at Theo. “Hsu’s your childhood sweetheart, huh? You used to want to be cops together.”

  Theo threw back his bourbon and, for good measure, drained the rest of his beer. Who was this shit fuck to come in here and play tough guy with him? He could wipe the floor with the bastard. Fortunately, like every man he’d ever met, he carried his mother’s voice in his head too.

  This is your mother, little fishy, and that’s the booze talking.

  But he also had his dad’s, right there, saying, Go get him. “I wanted to be a cop.”

  He glanced over and smiled at his old friend, who had turned his attention to Freddie, who looked annoyed at first but… then visibly softened. Jesus. Ortiz? Really? What about Calista? That fuck.

  Viciously, he added, “Koa just wanted people to stop fucking with him.”

  He’d aimed the remark at adult Koa, but it hit Woodie-the-boy right between the eyes. He looked like he’d been stabbed. Wait. Shit.

  I am a fucking moron. I shared something way too personal because I am jealous.

  Theo hated himself for it.

  “’Scuse me. I gotta go. Have a nice night, guys.” Theo left without reconnecting with Calista or Taryn. He was gonna get a nuclear-level nastygram about it, but nobody followed him out, which was just as well, because he didn’t know what Koa’d do if he and Freddie threw down for real. It already felt inevitable, like in a movie where the hero’s expecting to get beat up after school and a close-up of a clock bookends every scene.

  From the club, Theo headed for the ocean on foot. Granted, the ocean was legitimately anywhere he went if he walked long enough. Living on an island again was… hard to take in sometimes. He was back on the speck. On a smudge of land in the Pacific Ocean. He was vividly aware of his claustrophobia sometimes, of the futility of going around and around in circles and never getting anywhere.

  You can stop this thought pattern any time.

  He breathed deeply, in and out. Loosened his knees. Wiggled his toes.

  Being confronted by Koa and his past—by insular island life—it all felt too tight. He could fly out anytime he wanted. He could. But if he wanted the cozy embrace of his family, the only way to get it was to live on a Frisbee in the middle of nowhere. You made a choice. No choice is permanent. All options remain open….

  He ducked into the first bar he found for a drink and then made his way down the street. Bar after bar. Shot after shot. On foot and alone, and to make matters worse, the city had changed so much he sometimes lost his sense of where he was.

  Notice. Notice things around you.

  The balmy air smelled of car exhaust and weed. The breeze ruffled his hair. Those coqui frogs, though. Goddamn. He was gonna go deaf. He sat on a bench by an inlet and watched flags snap happily on the masts of all the yachts. He closed his eyes and listened to the familiar sound—the ping of hardware against an aluminum tube. Luffing sails. The slap of the tide against a wooden dock.

  Mist clung to his hair and dampened his clothes. His feet had long since become the source of an ache it was impossible to transcend. That’s what he got for taking off on foot like that, and after a long shift too.

  He could simply stay there while lush tropical greenery filled in all the blank places around him. Eventually it would cover him until he was part of the island. Subsumed by it. Maybe it was already happening.

  He closed his eyes.

  He believed in eternal things—connection and validation and redemption. He also believed in sex and alcohol. He cherished the ability to forget, and tonight was a bust on every level. He should have blown off Calista and Taryn and gone to a gay bar, got his dick sucked, and gone home to bed. Or gotten a good night’s sleep so he could keep his plans for flea market shopping. Now he was going to bed far too late to do anything decent after the game.

  He checked his phone at 4:00 a.m., a little dismayed by the mileage he’d put on his fitness tracker. Without seeing a better choice, he made his way back to his motorcycle. It was a helluva long walk, but it cleared his head. A lighted store sign loomed about two blocks away. If the store was open, he was going to stop in for a Red Bull. Angry voices coming from the alley in the back slowed his steps.

  “I said knock that shit off, man. You don’t treat people like that.” That was Koa’s voice. What the hell? Three men, low-voiced, arguing.

  A slap. A scuffle. Koa’s gritted words: “Do that again and lose the hand.”

  A lightly accented voice said, “Okay, okay. When’d you come to Jesus?”

  “C’mon, K. This is exactly what I need. And you haven’t done half of—”

  “Damnit. I’ve done all I want to do tonight. And you can’t keep pulling shit with my friends.”

  Freddie said, “Koa. I love you like a brother, but your friends are assssssssssholes.”

  “Don’t be a dumb fuck,” Koa replied angrily. “Being a dumb fuck is what’s gonna mess us up. You want that?”

  “Of course not.” Freddie lowered his voice. “But what those guys did after you left me with them? Was a little exhausting. I just want to chill.”

  “Not like this.”

  Theo tried moving toward the sound, but each step threatened to reveal his presence. He went as far as he dared and hid behind an overgrown hibiscus; from there he could see Freddie, but not Koa or the third man with them.

  “Look. They gave me this shit.” Ortiz shrugged like, What’re you gonna do? “They’re happy. Everybody’s happy. Why you gotta fuck with this?”

  “I’m not happy,” Koa replied angrily. “Not if you start—”

  “He’s right, O.” A new voice, also accented, surprised Theo, who moved deeper into the shadows. “Koa’s a smart man. You should listen to him.”

  New Guy apparently accomplished de-escalation, because the tension left Koa’s voice. Theo let out his breath slowly. Only an idiot would show himself to these men now.

  “C’mon, man,” Koa said to Freddie. “We’re the good guys, right? Keep that locked in. We’re the good guys.”

  The other two murmured assent.

  “And this”—Theo couldn’t see what Koa was talking about—“comes from the bad guys.”

  “I’m not hurting anyone, baby.”

  “That’s no excuse.” Koa pitched his voice low. “Even a little here or there? You know it’s wrong. You’re going to fuck us, O. You have no patience.”

  The other dude spoke again, but Theo missed what he said. He ducked back when Freddie and Koa came around the side of the building. They stood so close together that for a second, Theo thought they’d kiss. Theo wanted to die.

  Koa leaned in to say something Theo didn’t hear. He couldn’t stop himself picturing them together. Talking. Making plans. Weekends away together. Fucking. Blood rushed in his veins and his heart thudded so loud, Koa’s next words were lost to the wind.

  “You’re such a woman sometimes, K.” Ortiz shoved him away with a laugh. “I ain’t gonna jeopardize what we got for a bottle of Jack. Shit. You drive. I’m wasted.”

  “Sure. You go on ahead.” Koa slapped his keys into Ortiz’s hand. He pointed to the convenience store. “I gotta get something. I’ll see you in a sec. Don’t puke in my ride.”

  “Is there candy? I want candy.” He reeled over to the SUV, which had a citation on the windshield. He yanked the parking ticket out from under the wiper and waved it at Koa before shoving it into his pocket. “I’ll fix this. Don’t blow a gasket.”

  “Don’t get in the back,” Koa called after him. Ortiz ignored that. After the SUV chirped and the lights flickered, he climbed inside it like a mole. Eventually the lights went off again. With a muttered curse, Koa stepped into the convenience store, promising relief for Theo, who needed to pass by and hopefully avoid any kind of encounter.

  As usual, Relief stood him up. As soon as he got to the dimly lit alley on the other side, Koa burst from the shadows and caught him by the neck. Theo fought, but surprise and the brutal cer
tainty in Koa’s eyes stopped him.

  “Are you following me?” Koa shoved him against the wall.

  “Get off me.” With a mighty effort, Theo dislodged the bulkier man. “What’s your damage? Asshole.”

  Koa huffed. “Why are you even here, Te?”

  “How’s that your business?” He spat on the ground. “I left my bike at Eddie’s Place. How’d you become such an utter shit?”

  Koa glanced around before his expression softened. “You aren’t following me?”

  “No, bro.” Theo collected his dignity. He was tired and pissed off but not going to make a fool of himself. “Don’t flatter yourself.”

  Koa shot him a new, bright smile. “How come not?”

  “You treated me like shit earlier. Maybe I don’t want to give you a fat head, motherfucker.”

  “Again. How come not?” From that close, he could smell alcohol on Koa’s breath. Strong stuff. What head were they talking about now? Because…. Koa glanced around. “I’ma go now.”

  Koa let him go and started walking away.

  Theo should’ve let it go. He should have, but couldn’t. He called after Koa. “You really gonna be that guy? The one who shits on everything we had as kids whenever you think somebody’s watching?”

  “Someone’s always watching.” He raked his hands through his wild curls. “You get that, right?”

  “I thought we were friends is all. Now I know we’re not? Fine.”

  Koa had the grace to wince. “We are friends, Te. You just don’t understand, and I can’t explain shit right now.”

  “I was not spying on you, Woodie, but your boy Freddie? He’s not right. I don’t think you should trust him. He’s stringing Calista on, for one thing.”

  “Let me worry about Freddie. Try to trust me, just for a little while. Can you do that?” Koa blew out an unhappy sigh. “I can’t believe you’re finally here.”

  “Wh-what?” Theo glanced around again, surprised.

  “Every night I go to bed thinking you’re right next door.” Koa bit his lip, and Theo wanted a taste too.

  “I’m not”—Theo breathed the words—“next door anymore. I got a place. You should stop by.”

  “Oh yeah? Where at?” Koa stepped back into the shadows. Into Theo’s space. Of his own volition, Theo lifted his arms. Koa caught Theo’s hands and pinned them to the wall above his head.

  “It’s small,” Theo whispered as Koa’s mouth came down on his.

  “I’d fuck you anywhere.” Koa stepped forward again and they came together. Koa’s hard cock butted his, insistent as a battering ram.

  “Invitation stands.” Were they still talking about his apartment? Theo’s head dropped against the graffiti-spattered wall.

  “Oh, Te.” Koa pushed his face into Theo’s neck and inhaled deeply before nipping the top of his collarbone and planting kisses across his chest. “You got no idea how long I’ve waited for this.”

  “Oh, God. Me too.” He groaned. “You been drinking?”

  “Hell yeah.” Koa gave him a sloppy grin. “You’re not going to say this is the alcohol talking, are you?”

  Throat dry, Theo could only nod before Koa’s lips came down on his, pliant and soft. Heat suffused Theo’s body as Koa swallowed his moan.

  “C’mere,” Koa invited.

  Theo wrapped his leg around Koa’s muscled thigh. “Come and get me.”

  The sound of footsteps broke them guiltily apart.

  “Psst. Palapiti. Where the actual fuck—” Freddie came staggering around the corner of the building. He stopped abruptly when he saw them kissing deep in the shadows. “Oh.”

  “You’re supposed to be in the car, you shit.” Koa pushed Theo behind him.

  “You didn’t say you were looking for a third.” When he got close enough to see who Koa had pinned against the wall, he slapped the wall with an open palm, making both of them jump. “No. You promised me a girl this time.”

  Koa’s shoulders stiffened, but he didn’t say anything to contradict his partner. Theo clenched his teeth.

  “A girl?” He gave Koa that much.

  Freddie sneered. “Piece of advice, Hsu?”

  “What?” He snapped the word angrily, because as far as he was concerned, this was between him and Koa.

  Freddie flipped him off. “Stick with the rest of the tourists.”

  And then Koa stopped his heart. “Stop trying to get with me, Hsu. I told you, it ain’t happening.”

  Theo didn’t think he’d heard right. “What?”

  “Don’t get the wrong idea, is all.” Koa didn’t seem to remember pushing Theo against the wall and trying to bone him.

  “Walk away, Koa. Rip off that Band-Aid.” Freddie laughed. “It’s only gonna hurt him for a little while.”

  Theo’s heart went into hyperdrive. “What are you even talking about? You came on to me just now. You came on to me.”

  Freddie’s pitying gaze was the last straw.

  Stunned, Theo jerked away. Taken by surprise. Twice in one night.

  “Assholes.” He said the word loud and clear.

  Freddie frowned. “Don’t be a smart-mouth.”

  “Or what?” Theo stood his ground.

  Koa’s eye roll said it all.

  “Or what?” Theo shouted. “Or what, Woodie? You gonna tell my mom I watch porn? What’s the actual threat here?”

  “Fuck off.” When he still didn’t get an answer, Theo turned furiously.

  He needed… something. An energy drink, a beef stick. Something to keep the sick despair inside him from welling up with the last six drinks and the pretzels he’d eaten in lieu of dinner.

  Stick with the rest of the tourists.

  The hell he would. He stalked toward the convenience store’s door, but some kid who looked about twelve years old closed and locked it and then swung the accordion gate closed.

  Someone’s always watching.

  Theo stood in the shadows, wondering about Koa’s behavior and everything he’d said before banging on the glass, but the boy didn’t answer. Eventually the lights shut off. As far as he could tell, no one left the premises, but he couldn’t watch both the front and the back of the building at the same time.

  For a moment Theo laid his forehead against the glass. Yeah. Definitely, he was sober enough to ride. But he wasn’t going to forget this. He knew Hawai‘i, and he knew Koa better than that, even. There was something legit weird going on, and Theo was going to find out exactly what it was before Koa threw his career away over personal loyalty to a douchebag like Freddie Ortiz.

  Chapter Six

  ON HIS next shift, Theo made sure his uniform was crisp and fresh. The same could not be said for his attitude. Briefing was a blur. Theo’d been too late to grab a coffee, so he barely comprehended the words. When they were dismissed, he found Calista, who was none too happy with him.

  “Morning, Officer Hsu.” She eyed him like she’d found him beneath her shoe. “Don’t disappear from work today. That’d be harder for me to explain than why you blew off Taryn’s party.”

  “I had to leave.” He double-checked his weapon and radio before getting himself a water bottle and downing it. “Paco told me to avoid Ortiz and them. The detectives.”

  She frowned. “Paco?”

  “My trainer. I guess he used to be on the job?”

  “I know Paco. You talked to him about Freddie and Koa? Jesus. They’re not bad guys—” She rolled her eyes. “They act like children, but they’re family.”

  He had a different take after Friday. He pointed to his fading bruise. “Seems like it’s not just hot air.”

  She softened things. “Brass lets them get away with a little ego if they get results, so what? They have an amazing solve rate.”

  He couldn’t explain the unease that had built up while he’d listened to his old friend casually discuss how much they could get away with. Theo wasn’t a choirboy. But he paid for his booze. Ortiz and them…. Koa…. Are you losing the plot?

&nb
sp; When did I start dragging our own?

  Now, apparently. I’m that guy now, because I’ve got a double standard for Koa. If Koa thought he could blow off ethical questions and treat Theo like a rookie? Theo had some bad news for him.

  He spent the next several hours observing, reporting, warning, directing, and consoling people. They passed by Eddie’s Place, and a couple blocks later, he stopped in front of the liquor store where he’d seen Koa and Ortiz.

  “Look, you mind if I go in here?” he asked, not knowing the right questions or whom he’d ask if he thought of any question at all.

  “Go ahead.” She waited for him as she often did, seemingly wasting time watching traffic or gazing deceptively into store windows. If anyone was getting up to something, she’d see it, give the window a sharp tap, and they’d take care of it. There was no downtime for them as long as they were in uniform.

  The minimart was typical of the sort that sells sunscreen and cheap tourist goods. It smelled of floor cleaner and coconuts and the hot dogs currently rotating like glossy supermodels in a tiny tanning machine. The buns were stale, but buns like that—he’d once done an experiment—they never got moldy. School was long over, and his dad had finally thrown his experiment out, but those hot dog buns had never gotten a speck of mold.

  He grabbed a couple coconut waters and headed for the checkout counter. A woman of impossible-to-guess age was behind the register, filling a bank bag with cash from the till.

  He said, “May I ask you a question?”

  “One minute.” She moved only her lips. Her eyes stayed on the money. Scary as fuck, if you had a mom like his. He just knew she could curse his name in fifteen different languages. Loudly, she called in Cantonese for someone to come.

  “Do you own this place?”

  A man—well older than she—entered from an office behind a curtain in back. “Yes. I own many places.”

  He and the woman spoke in rapid Cantonese, of which Theo understood about every third word. The man took over register duties for the woman, who bowed away with the bank bag and melted behind the curtain.

  Theo smiled. “This is going to sound weird, but last Friday night I was walking by and I heard—”