Indulge

by Liv Morris

  She readjusts herself in the chair and drinks her coffee as well. She places the coffee cup down and brushes her bangs from her face. “I’m alright. I heard my sister came to the office. I’m sorry about that Mr. Greene she’s upset and is protective over me.”

  “I understand. I’m like that with Logan.” We both let out a laugh. The tension seems to lift and I see her shoulders and body begin to relax. “I want to hire you back Heather. I was angry that day and took it out on you. I’m so sorry and hope you can forgive me.”

  Her eyes start to shine and a smile starts to form on her face. “Oh! Mr. Greene I would love to come back and work for you!”

  “I’m sorry, but Heather is not coming back to work for you!” We both spin around and notice Abigail walking into the kitchen. Her long wavy brown hair has light curls and covers her beautiful face. I notice she is wearing some make up and her brown and gold eye shadow mix make her eyes glimmer. Those beautiful eyes bring me in and I can’t stop staring. My eyes go down her body. She’s wearing a fitted black button down shirt with a gray pencil skirt.

  I hear Heather moving and the chair pushing away from the table. “Abigail, stop please. It’s okay. I want to go back and work.” Heather stands next to me facing her sister. “You told me to always follow what I want and this is what I want.”

  Abigail walks closer and sets her hand on Heather’s shoulder. “I just want you to be happy,” she explains in a hush tone. “Are you sure?” Heather nods and gives her a reassuring smile. “Alright. Can you get Lucas ready?”

  “Alright. Bye Mr. Greene, I’ll see you tomorrow?”

  I stand up and face the ladies. “It’s Wednesday and we are all set for now. Enjoy the last few days and I’ll see you on Monday.”

  “Okay!” Before I know it Heather runs and jumps in my arms. I’m speechless. “Thanks.” She whispers in my ear.

  “No, thank you.” I slowly let her go. As she walks out of the kitchen, the tension returns. I feel like a child ready to get yelled at. I pick up my coffee mug and bring it to the sink. I turn on the faucet and wait for the water to get warm. I put liquid soap on the blue sponge and dip the sponge under the water. I wash the mug and rinse it a few times before setting it on the dish rack. Throughout this time I feel Abigail’s eyes on me. Wow those eyes can create fire. I feel nervous and unsure of myself. I turn around and look her in the eyes.

  “Why good morning Abigail. You look beautiful today.”

  She huffs and walks to the coffee pot. “Just don’t hurt her again. Please.”

  I hear the sadness in her voice and it breaks me. “I won’t.”

  Abigail turns around and leans against the counter. “You know she adores you and loves working for you. It would be nice for you to show her your appreciation.” I simply nod. “Why are you doing this?”

  I let out a light laugh. “I’m turning over a new leaf. I miss having Heather in the office. She’s a great assistant.”

  “Yeah she’s a great girl”

  She turns back around and makes her coffee. Here’s my chance. I walk up to her. “Here let me make this for you. Why don’t you sit down?” I see that she’s taken aback from my offer but accepts. I watch her studying me, trying to figure me out. I shake my head and laugh. After a few moments of silence, I finish making her coffee and bring it to her. I sit back down and look at her again. “Have dinner with me.”

  Surprise on her face makes me smile and her eyes go wide and quickly stare at me. “I don’t think so.”

  I place my hand on the table close to hers. She notices but doesn’t move her hand away from mine. I want to be with her. She’s all I think about. I’m not sure what I’m doing exactly. When I look back at her, I catch her looking at me but I can’t tell what she is thinking or feeling. I want to take her to dinner and start some sort of relationship with this captivating woman. “Well why not?” I playfully ask.

  “Because I don’t want to,” she quickly responds.

  I look at my watch and notice it’s nearly eight and I have a nine o’clock meeting. I get up from my chair and see her eyes following me. I bend down and reach for her left hand, “Well I don’t want to take no for an answer. Tonight at eight. I’ll have Gary come get you. See you soon beautiful.”

  Chapter 8

  Abigail

  Standing there speechless I cannot believe what just happened. I watch Mister Sex-on-a-stick walk out the door. Oh this is not going to be good. I take a sip of my coffee and play back everything that just took place. This is definitely a joke and he’s going to text me and say “just kidding!” Why does he want me? Why does he like me? I shake my head and keep wondering these things. I haven’t dated in a while and bringing a man into my life doesn’t seem right. I look at the picture on the refrigerator and think about Lucas. I need to be fair to him. He should not have to see men walk in and out of my life.

  Before he was born, I promised myself there wouldn’t be any pointless relationships in my life. Lucas was my number one priority. I had always put the feelings and happiness of others before my own. I wasn’t sure what true happiness and true love felt like. I thought I loved Ryan but after everything that happened and his betrayal, love wasn’t something that came easily to me. I thought about Ryan and wondered what he was doing sometimes. I wanted answers. I wanted to know why he did what he did.

  I close my eyes again and shake out the memories of my past. I’ve moved on with my life and things are great. I have Lucas and Heather and my friends and second graders keep me busy.

  I hear Heather and Lucas laughing nearby. I get up from the table and follow their laughter.

  “Look Lucas! Mama has a date tonight!” Heather and Lucas high five one another.

  “Oh grow up you two!” I roll my eyes at them. “Come on Lucas we have to get going.” He grabs his back pack from the living room and runs over to me. Another day with my second graders; I smile as we step outside into the world.

  We pull into the school parking lot and I get Lucas out of the car. “Come on, time to learn something fun!”

  Lucas groans. “I hate kindergarten mama! It’s so boring!”

  I can’t help but laugh. If he thinks kindergarten is boring now, I’ll have a lot to deal with when he gets older. “Lucas, stop that. Think positive! Today is going to be fun fun fun!”

  He groans again, “Please stop that Mama.” We get inside and since it’s not cool to give him a hug, we high five instead. “Have a good day Mama.”

  “You too Lucas. See you in a little bit!” I blow him a kiss but he sticks his tongue out at me and walks away. I shake my head and head to my classroom. I open the door and turn on the lights. There are twenty two little desks and chairs all over. I set it up so that there will be four tables in a square shape so that kids are able to interact with one another. I set down my purse and walk to the chalk board. I pick out two colored chalks, blue and pink, and write a good morning message on the board for my little ones.

  Good morning class. Please have a seat and take out your Wednesday read book.

  I am lucky this year to have a great group of students. They’re all special and each brings in something different to the classroom.

  “Good morning sexy thing!”

  I look over and see my best friend Marilyn strolling in through the door. Her sleek black hair shines and there’s a sparkle in those green eyes of hers. “Good morning darling. Why are we happy this morning?”

  She takes a sip of her coffee and lets out a soft moan. “Oh! Abigail! Christopher was all hands this morning.” She closes her eyes and tips her head back. “Do you know what it’s like to wake up to a python poking you?”

  I let out a loud laugh and nearly fall to the ground laughing. “Unfortunately I don’t but I’m sure you are going to tell me!”

  “Girl! I do not know what he’s taking but whatever it is ohhhhhhh baby. He was a freak this morning! He was whispering all of this sexy stuff. Telling me I’m hot and I’m his little slut. He blind folded m
e and rubbed his dick in between the girls. Ohhh I nearly died!”

  My mouth drops! Christopher Reese is a quiet software developer. He wears glasses and his sense of style is at zero. I can’t believe what I’m hearing. I look at Marilyn with my eyes popping out and see her smiling from ear to ear. “One, please stop! Now I can’t even look at him, and two how did you manage that with the girls in the house?”

  “Um they were at my parent’s today. Yeah they take them every now and then.” Marilyn looks away from me as if she’s hiding something.

  I go up to her and place my hand on her shoulder. “Marilyn? What’s going on?”

  “Ugh! Abigail they are driving me crazy! One minute Clare is screaming for a cookie and the next Danielle slaps Clare to make her stop, then they both are fighting each other! How can my four year old twins be so mean? They are too much to handle so my parents take them once a week before I commit murder!” Marilyn sits on the table and starts crying, “Am I a bad mother?”

  “Oh honey no! It is okay to feel this way. Sometimes I leave Lucas with Heather and just go for a drive. It doesn’t mean you love them any less!”

  She dries her tears and gets up, “Thanks Abigail. I needed that.” We look at the clock and notice it is almost time to start teaching. “See you at lunch?”

  “Of course!”

  *****

  Lucas and I get home at our usual time, four thirty. Today my students must’ve been on a sugar high because they were a handful! Lucas tells me about his day and how he got the chance to stand in front of the class and tell a story. A look of pride fills his face when he tells me about it.

  “That sounds fantastic Lucas! See kindergarten is not so bad huh?”

  He rolls his eyes, “Okay mama!”

  “Alright go relax and play. Mama will be upstairs.”

  I watch as Lucas runs to the living room and turns on the television.

  My head is spinning and I can’t seem to figure anything out. I look through my closet and there is nothing remotely sexy or beautiful. “What am I doing?” I throw all my dresses on my bed but nothing looks good enough. “Ugh!”

  I pick up my phone and text Heather.

  Me: I have nothing to wear tonight!

  Heather: A go to my closet. In the wayyyyy back and I have some stuff in there you would like. Trust me!

  Me: Do I even want to know?

  Heather: Nope ;)

  I run to Heather’s room and find the perfect dress. It’s a little short, but it’s simple with a touch of elegance. Going back to my room I jump in the shower and start shaving my legs. Damn I knew I should’ve gone to the spa! I’m panicking and it sucks! This date is too short of a notice. How does he expect me to be ready? Am I ready?

  I sit on the edge of my shower and think about any reason to stay home. This isn’t happening. He’s going to stand me up and I’ll never date again. This is pointless. I shouldn’t be here like this. Finishing up with my shaving and preparing for a hopeful date I go back to my room and try to find the perfect shoes. “Ugh why is this so hard?” I slump down on my bedroom floor.

  “Mama, mama! What’s wrong?” Lucas runs through my door and stands by my side. His cheeks covered in chocolate as he’s standing there looking up at me.

  I get down on my knees and laugh, “Nothing baby boy. Mama just doesn’t have any nice shoes.” Out of nowhere, Lucas’ face contorts to an expression full of pain.

  “Mama?” His soft whisper with pain indicates disaster. I quickly grab him and run to the bathroom. When I put him down, he runs to the toilet and vomits. I take a wash cloth and turn on the faucet. The warm water runs as I wet and wring the washcloth.

  “Mama!” Lucas calls out to me.

  “Sweetie I’m coming.” I turn off the faucet and place the wash cloth on Lucas’ neck. He continues to vomit for a few minutes. I feel bad as his tiny body violently shakes. He lifts his head and his face is pale. I wash his face and take off his clothes. I start the bath and help him get in. “Okay baby, just relax and Mama will take care of you.” I take another washcloth and start washing him up. His body feels hot and I feel so horrible. I hate when he gets sick. I sit on the bathroom floor and pull out my phone to call his doctor. I explain the symptoms and they give me instructions with what to do. The stomach flu. Of course.

  I take Lucas out of the tub and dry him off with a towel. We go to his room and I get his pajamas out. “Okay sweetie, go ahead and put this on.”

  He puts on his pajamas and I feel his forehead, he’s still very warm. I tuck him in bed and give him a kiss on the forehead. “If you need me just yell okay?”

  “Okay Mama. Thank you for taking care of me.”

  I give him another kiss. “You don’t ever have to thank me. I love you.”

  He slowly closes his eyes and turns on his side, “I love you too Mama.”

  I leave his room and leave the door wide open so I can hear him if he needs me. I make my way downstairs to the living room and sit on the couch. I dial Jacob’s office and ask to speak to him.

  “Greene Publishing how can I help you?”

  A man answers the phone and I forget what to say. Is this Jacob? “Ja-jacob?”

  “No ma’am this is Gary. Mr. Greene is in a meeting right now. Can I take a message?”

  “Oh I’m sorry. Hi Gary, this is Abigail. My son is sick and I can’t make it to dinner tonight. Can you let him know?”

  “Certainly Ms. Anderson. Have a great day and I hope your little guy feels better.”

  “Thanks Gary. Have a great day.” I hang up my phone and turn on the television. A part of me is disappointed and I want to ask Heather to come home and watch Lucas but I’m his mom. I remember the promise I made all those years ago and curl up on the couch. When will my happily ever after come?

  After finally getting Lucas settled on the couch with me we watch Finding Nemo as I stroke his hair and listen to his steady breathing. I’m glad he’s feeling somewhat better and I contemplate whether I should Jacob and tell him to disregard the previous message. Lucas stirs in my arms and I let out a sigh. I need to be a mom first, like it’s always been. If Jacob really wants me then we’ll reschedule. It’ll all work out.

  “Mama?”

  “Yes baby?”

  “Thanks for staying here with me and taking care of me. Sorry I’m sick.” He squeezes my arm and I smile. My little boy needs me and I’ll always be here for him. Kissing the top of his head I tell him to try and sleep.

  Chapter 9

  Jacob

  The phone conference is dragging and all I can think about is Abigail. What a fucking waste of time this phone conference is. I stop listening and take out my phone. Logan keeps looking over at me and I know he’s wondering what’s going on with me. I lean back in my chair and try to listen to Anthony talk about a few potential authors and their story lines.

  Anthony’s the head of our New York City office. He’s a man in his thirties, divorced, two kids, an asshole, but one of the greatest business minds I’ve met.

  “Jacob, Logan,” he pauses, “I’m telling you. Contemporary romance and erotica is what’s selling now! We need to look at the female audience and target their desires and their fantasies. Come on boys. It’s April! Summer is coming. Think. Summer. Hot bodies. Hormones rising. Women want hot fucking sex and we will give it to them!”

  “Anthony, I get what you’re saying but I have no idea how to promote that crap.” Logan looks over at me waiting for me to answer.

  “I got the girl.” Logan shoots his eyes at me with curiosity. I sit up in my chair and feel confident with my answer. “Heather, my personal assistant, will be great with this project. She’s a smart girl. I know she can push this to where we need it to be.”

  “Alright boys get it set up. I’ll be down there in a few weeks.”

  “Sounds good Anthony. We’ll talk to you soon.” I hang up the call and I know Logan is waiting for some answers.

  “Big brother?” His voice is full of wonder and
hesitation.

  I get up from my chair and walk around. For a long moment I think about my plan to get what I want. If I promote Heather, this will show Abigail how serious I am. Abigail wants to make sure her sister is appreciated. This can work in my favor. I can train her and teach her what I know. Logan will agree. I turn my back to Logan and look outside towards the world. This is my new and fresh start. This is what Katherine would want. She would want me to trust more people to help me with my decisions. I look to the sky and the sun is beaming down into my office. There is a calm presence and I feel at ease. I turn back and face Logan, “This will be good. We can prep her before Anthony comes down and it’ll all work out. Trust me.”

  Logan stretches his arms out on the couch and starts laughing. “Wait wait. Is this about something else?” I’m not sure how to answer his question but I know he knows what this is about. The closer I get to Heather, the closer I’ll get to Abigail. A part of me hopes this works and I do trust Heather as long as we prep her well for Anthony.

  “I don’t know what you’re talking about Logan. This is business. Heather is a young woman and I think that with the right teaching she will do a great job. Anthony has a point; the romance world is growing. What’s that one book that came out? Women were going crazy about it. That red room of pain book.”

  “Fifty Shades of Grey. Hayden’s obsessed with that book. If she compares me to Christian Grey again I think I’m going to die! She’s been biting her bottom lip more and wants me to be turned on,” Logan laughs, “I can’t help but laugh at her.” We burst out laughing as I pour two glasses of scotch for the both of us.

  The rest of the day goes by without any problems. I finish up some last minute emails when Gary comes walking into my office. “Gary what’s going on? I thought you would be on your way to pick up Abigail.” I didn’t mean to sound annoyed and rude but I want tonight to be perfect.