The Cowboy, The Cheat, His Ex-Wife & Her Vibrator

by C. C. Coburn

  “I’m really tired and want to take a nap, could you make sure the kids are okay while I’m out to it?”

  Tilly smiled and stood up. “You’re forgetting your mom is here doting on them. But of course I’ll make sure they’re fine. You have a long sleep. I’ll check on you a bit later, but if you’re out to it, do you want me to wake you for dinner?”

  Beth shook her head. “I’m not sure I could keep it down anyway.”

  “Okay, I’ll tell everyone to leave you alone. Sleep tight.”

  Beth watched the door close behind her friend and rolled onto her stomach and scrunched up her pillow under her head. She was almost asleep when there was a faint knock at the door.

  Beth was going to ignore it but then a familiar voice said from the doorway, “Beth, do you mind if I come in?”

  Looks like you already are, Beth wanted to say to her mother–in–law but managed to hold her tongue.

  She rolled over and watched as Victoria advanced into the room and took a seat in the tub chair in the corner. As usual Victoria sat bolt upright, hands clasped in her lap. Did this woman ever relax and let down her guard?

  Beth hated her mother–in–law. She possibly hated her even more than she hated JJ. For Victoria had helped mold JJ into the completely unfeeling, uncaring irresponsible jerk he’d become. Her constant interference in their marriage during the early days had annoyed Beth, but deep at the heart of this was Victoria’s need to control everything within her sphere. The woman had idolized her only child. Spoiled him rotten. Beth maintained that JJ learned how to manipulate women at his mother’s knee. Smile sweetly, give an empty compliment and he got a treat, got what he wanted every time. In his mother’s eyes he could do no wrong—this led JJ to believing his behavior—no matter how bad in the eyes of others, was quite acceptable. If you could get away with it, then why not?

  “I wanted to talk to you about the children,” she began.

  Beth was having nothing of it. “In that case, you can save your breath, Victoria. I know why you had your lawyer at the funeral today, but you haven’t got a snowflake’s chance in hell of getting custody of my kids if I go to jail. I’ve already had formal papers drawn up giving my mother full custody.”

  Beth gave an involuntary shudder at the thought of JJ’s mother messing with her kids and the boys turning out like their father had.

  Beth was surprised when she saw Victoria’s usually impassive face crumple. “It… it’s not about that… I… I know you hate me, despise me…”

  Oh, god, could she make me feel any worse? Beth wondered. The poor woman had just buried her son and now had to face up to admitting she knew exactly how Beth felt about her. Had she been that transparent?

  “Victoria—” Beth started to say something to try and comfort the woman, but was cut off.

  “I had intended filing for custody of the children if you went to jail…”

  And just when I thought you were turning into a human being, thought Beth, you go and spoil it all by admitting your true reason for being here. “I’m not going to jail,” Beth told her with more conviction than she felt.

  “I hope you aren’t either.”

  “Excuse me?”

  “I don’t believe you killed JJ. Sure, you’re capable of having been terribly cold and unfeeling towards him—”

  With good reason, Beth wanted to say.

  “But I don’t believe you’re capable of murder. Or of planning it, in spite of what the news reports claim.”

  “Well… ah, thank you, Victoria,” Beth managed to say. “I appreciate your vote of confidence. But if you’re not here to serve me with papers, then why are you here?”

  Victoria’s face crumpled completely and she reached for a tissue. “I’m sorry,” she apologized, “I didn’t mean to get emotional about this, but there’s something I need to tell you. Maybe it will help you to understand me better and not cut me out of my grandchildren’s lives…”

  Fifteen minutes later, Victoria had left, amidst promises from both of them to keep in touch and for the kids to spend some time with their paternal grandmother.

  Beth was stunned. She’d never expected Victoria’s visit to turn into a huge confession session. If only she’d known, maybe things would have been different between her and JJ, and between her and Victoria. Well, she couldn’t do much about JJ, but from now on, she could work on creating a more positive relationship with her children’s grandmother, for until today, Victoria had never told Beth about the children she’d lost. The three miscarriages and the two babies, born but taken before their time.

  JJ had never told Beth because he didn’t know about them. His mother had wanted to protect him from the harsh realities of life. He was too precious to her to have him weighed down by such awful knowledge.

  Victoria hadn’t wanted to look back once JJ had come along. The past was too painful. Better to concentrate on what you had, not what you’d lost. Better to control things that were within your power. She’d idolized JJ, spoiled him because he was so dear to her. Surely as a mother, Beth could understand how tragic the loss of child would be? The loss of five babies would be devastating. Beth was sure she’d never be the same after tragedies like that. If only Victoria had told her sooner…

  Beth had just dozed off after Victoria had left, when there was another knock at her door. This time, it was her mother.

  “Do you mind if I come in for a moment, dear?” Ellen asked and without waiting for a response walked in, closed the door and perched on the side of Beth’s bed. “We haven’t had much of a chance to talk to each other since I got here,” she pointed out unnecessarily.

  Beth sat up. “We can talk tomorrow.” Any other time but now would be good. She suppressed a yawn.

  “Nigel’s just called and I have some wonderful news.”

  Nigel was her mom’s ‘beau’ as she preferred to call him. Anything to make Ellen feel younger, Beth guessed. ”What’s the news?”

  “Nigel and I have been living together for a while now and—”

  Her mother was living with a man? Having sex with a man? Her mother had always seemed prudish about sex. She was completely outrageous about a lot of things, but according to Ellen, unmarried people just didn’t do ‘it’.

  "Mom, I hope you’re practicing safe sex?"

  "Now why would I bother with all that, dear?” she asked, looking completely bewildered. “I went through the Change, years ago."

  Beth dropped her head to her hands. "Oh, God. Why me?" She glanced up at her mother. She was smiling at Beth.

  Ellen patted her daughter’s hand. "It’s alright, dear. Nigel and I had a long talk about those sorts of things when we first started dating. You don’t need to worry about me."

  They’d been having sex since they started dating? Beth was mortified. What had happened to her mother? Had this Nigel fellow somehow influenced her mother so much, she was prepared to forgo her values, no matter how old–fashioned they may seem in today’s society? Whatever, Ellen was a mature woman and maybe it was none of Beth’s business what her mother did with her private life. But she still worried about her.

  Beth wanted to take it further, check that her mother really was practicing safe sex, but she didn’t want to have her mother sharing any more intimate details of her sex life. Particularly as Beth didn’t have a sex life of her own, since Gabe wasn’t talking to her anymore.

  She changed the subject slightly. “How does Nigel feel about your plans to move back here to Denver?”

  “Oh, he’s looking forward to it!”

  Beth was as confused as she usually was after a conversation with her mother. “So you’re splitting up? That’s a shame, ‘cos quite frankly I haven’t seen you this happy in ages.”

  “Of course we’re not splitting up! He’s moving here too. He’s sick of all the old people in Florida too, to tell you the truth. Plus, it’s terribly hot there, dear. We both enjoy golfing and hiking and Colorado has the perfect climate and scenery for doing both
, so we just decided to up stumps and move here. What do you think about that?”

  Apart from the fact that it would be very convenient, should Beth end up in jail, the kids would love having their grandmother close by.

  Goodness! Her children had had very little contact with Victoria because Beth couldn’t stand the woman and had seemed so standoffish with the kids anyway and had not seen that much more of Beth’s mother. Ellen wasn’t particularly maternal and lived halfway across the country. But now, within the space of several minutes, Beth had two willing grandmothers coming out of her ears!

  “I think that sounds great, Mom.” She reached over and gave her mother a hug. Strangely, Ellen didn’t pull away first, just clung to her daughter. She clung so long and so hard that Beth started to worry that her mother wasn’t particularly confident that Beth would escape the murder rap she was facing.

  Beth released her mother. “Everything’s going to be fine, you know that don’t you, Mom?”

  Her mother rose from the bed. “I hope so, dear. Otherwise I don’t fancy how I’ll explain everything in my Christmas newsletter to everyone.”

  Beth pulled a face. “Gee, thanks.”

  “Only joking, dear.” Ellen patted her hand. “Now, were you trying to have a nap and I interrupted?”

  “Well, yes. But that’s okay, we don’t get much time to talk.”

  “We will have from now on,” Ellen promised her.

  Beth reached into her bedside table and pulled out a pen, a pin and notepad and scribbled on it. “Would you do me a favor and stick this to my door?”

  Ellen read the note and smiled as she pinned the Do Not Disturb! notice to Beth’s door and with a tiny wave closed it behind her.

  In spite of her exhaustion, sleep didn’t come easily. Beth had a real dilemma on her hands. What would she do about the baby? In a perfect world, a world free of the threat of spending the rest of her life behind bars for a crime she didn’t commit, she’d keep the baby and somehow raise it on her own. But, how could she do that if she was sent to jail? Ellen had said she would take care of her children if worse turned to worst. How would her mom feel when she announced, “Oh, by the way, Mom, would you mind adding another mouth to feed to the four I’m already leaving in your tender care?”

  At that bit of news, Ellen would probably hightail it back to Florida on the next flight. Because while Beth was pleased with how her mom was treating her grandchildren at present, Beth wasn’t overly confident of Ellen being able to make a real commitment to their long–term care where she was their sole custodian. Beth simply didn’t have that much confidence in her mother’s maternal instincts.

  And what about this Nigel guy? Beth hadn’t even met him yet. What if he was a sociopath or a child molester or simply hated the kids on sight? It was one thing to leave her kids with her mother and quite another to leave them with her mother and someone she knew nothing about—apart from the fact that he was screwing her mom—and rather thoroughly, Beth surmised, judging by the glow on Ellen’s face.

  So when it all boiled down to it, keeping the child all hinged on whether she was convicted of JJ’s murder. The thought of abortion was abhorrent to her, but the thought of raising a baby in jail was worse.

  If only she could think of some way to prove her innocence? Pride had kept her from giving Deputy Stevens Gabe’s name when he’d first informed her of JJ’s death, but pride did indeed go before a fall. She was about as low as she could be. She needed Gabe’s help and she needed it desperately. And she needed to tell him the truth about the baby. He’d probably be angry as all hell that she hadn’t told the complete truth about it being a safe time of the month for her, and how would he react to knowing he was going to be a father? He was so very against Marina having a baby and had declared he never wanted the responsibility of being a father. Beth groaned. She needed sleep to think clearly. And she couldn’t sleep still half dressed in her funeral outfit. She rose and walked into her bathroom, surprising herself that she didn’t need another trip to the sink to throw up anything. Nothing left to throw up anyway.

  After a long hot shower, she slipped under her sheets naked, reveling in the softness of the fine cotton against her bare skin. Within moments, she was asleep.

  When were you planning on telling me?”

  Beth rubbed her eyes. Gabe, looking more masculine, more gorgeous, more intimidating than ever, was standing at the foot of her bed, his arms crossed over his chest. Beth decided he’d also never looked more infuriated.

  She pulled the covers up in a vain effort to protect herself from the ferocity of his gaze and figured it must be mid–morning judging by the angle of the sun hitting her curtains. How long had she slept?

  “I asked you a question,” he said, “and I’m not leaving until I get an answer.”

  Having him glaring down at her was daunting. Beth sat up, pulling the covers up to her chin to cover her nakedness. Bad move. Her stomach roiled.

  She threw back the covers and raced for the bathroom, uncaring of her nakedness. She dry retched over the sink and splashed water on her face to try and calm herself then rested her hands on the countertop. She was shaking with the aftereffects of having her insides turned inside out. Beth hated that feeling. It left her feeling so vulnerable and she didn’t want to feel vulnerable right now, she needed to be strong, to think clearly, to talk to Gabe.

  Her shoulders relaxed a little as she felt her robe being placed over them and then Gabe was there, massaging gently between her shoulder blades. “What can I get for you?” he asked, then without waiting for a reply, wrapped his arms around her from behind and pulled her back against him.

  Desire and love mingled with gratitude and she allowed him to wrap her more firmly in his grasp. “Just this,” she murmured and reveled in the comfort of being in Gabe’s arms again. “Just you.”

  They stood like that for long minutes, their breathing and heartbeats in time with each other. Finally, Gabe released her and helped her into her robe. She tied it at her waist then looked up at Gabe in the mirror. “Would you give me a few moments to freshen up please?”

  Gabe frowned, as though it wasn’t what he expected from her. “Sure. Can I get you anything? Crackers? Tea? Juice?”

  Beth smiled. At least he didn’t look angry with her anymore. “All three please, and make the tea white and really sweet.”

  He planted a kiss on the back of her neck. “I’ll be back in a tic.”

  Beth held her breath as she watched him leave her bathroom. Maybe vomiting, or at least nearly vomiting, wasn’t such a bad thing? Gabe had gone from furious to fuzzy in a matter of seconds. But she knew when he got back, he’d be demanding some answers!

  Damn Tilly and her big mouth! She’d have preferred to meet Gabe on her terms, not on his.

  Beth brushed her teeth, scrubbed her face and applied moisturizer and a little blusher to lift her complexion. She’d been white when she’d first lifted her face to the mirror, not a good look. The messed up hair wasn’t either. She pulled a brush through it and considered her options, to dress or not to dress?

  What she and Gabe had to discuss was pretty serious stuff. The rest of her life and that of her kids could depend on the outcome, maybe talking to Gabe dressed only in her robe wasn’t the best idea?

  She pulled on jeans and a favorite soft sweatshirt. Comfort clothes. Then pulled her covers up and sat on the bed, waiting for Gabe’s return.

  Beth could hear her children downstairs talking excitedly to Gabe. How they’d missed him this past week! They’d talked about him almost constantly, asking when Gabe would be coming to visit. Beth had brushed them off with excuses. She’d hated doing that to them, but she had so much to deal with, she simply didn’t have time to explain that Gabe didn’t like her anymore and wouldn’t be coming to visit. She chewed on her lip and waited and wondered how he felt about her now.

  Beth’s heart started pounding when she heard Gabe’s footsteps on the stairs. Not long now. This was make or break
. Her hands were clammy with fear and anticipation and she felt nauseous again. She probably looked like crap again too. With trembling fingers, Beth combed her hair off her face and plastered on a smile as Gabe entered the room.

  He placed a tray containing juice, a plate of crackers and a mug of hot tea on the bed in front of her. Beth snatched up one of the crackers and enjoyed the salty rush on her tongue. She chewed and swallowed and felt a bit better.

  Gabe watched her in silence. Beth didn’t know how to begin their conversation. She took several gulps of the tea and felt a whole lot better. There was something very comforting and relaxing about sweet, white tea she decided.

  “Thanks,” she finally said. “I really needed that.”

  Gabe still said nothing, just sat silently watching her, his eyes never leaving her face. It was unnerving.

  “Can you stop staring at me, please? It’s making me feel sick all over again.”

  “Have you had morning sickness before?” he asked.

  “Before today, or with my other… pregnancies? Yes, and yes.” She ate another cracker and chewed slowly, feeling in imminent danger of bringing it all up again.

  “Where do we go from here, Beth?”

  “I… I don’t know. I haven’t had much time to think about what do to. I… I could be facing a jail term. I can’t bring up a baby in jail.” Tears welled in her eyes.

  Gabe pushed the tray aside and drew her into his arms. “Hey, that’s not going to happen, darlin’, you’re innocent. I spoke to Deputy Stevens again this morning and given events of the last few days, he considers you have an alibi after all.”

  Beth’s face crumpled. “I’m sorry to have drawn you into this,” she sobbed against his shirt. It felt so good, so comforting to be in his arms again.

  He tipped up her chin. “I’d go to the ends of the earth for you, you know that, don’t you, darlin’?” he asked, his eyes dark with emotion.

  “N… no, I didn’t. I didn’t even know if you s… still liked me. You were s… so angry that day back at the ranch.”