Wrecked

by Harmon, AJ

  Relief washed over him as he saw the car pull up and park. Ethan helped Bess from the passenger seat and Andrew noted the way he held her hand as he walked her to the front door.

  “I see that he’s done something right,” Andrew smiled.

  The idea that Bess could be happy made Andrew full of hope. He knew what it was like to be alone and didn’t want that future for her. She should have the life that was denied him… the life that she deserved.

  Ethan and Bess disappeared from view as they entered the house. Andrew was curious but stayed put. He wouldn’t intrude. He would wait for Bess to come and find him and tell him all about her date.

  “Hang tight,” Bess told Ethan as she closed the front door. “I’m going to change out of my gown into normal clothes,” she grinned. “Then I’ll make some coffee.”

  “How about iced tea?” suggested Ethan.

  “Even better,” she yelled over her shoulder as she walked to her bedroom.

  Ethan set to work in the kitchen, whistling as he filled the kettle and pulled tea bags from the canister on the counter. He was happy and nothing could dampen his spirits. It was just a matter of time and Bess would be his. Dreams of a future with her were filling his thoughts.

  As he waited for the water to boil, there was a knock at the door.

  “I’ll get it,” he yelled as he walked to the foyer.

  “Hello?” he asked as he opened the door.

  “Does Elizabeth Williams live here?”

  “Uh, who’s asking?” Ethan frowned as he looked at the older couple in front of him.

  “None of your business,” the disheveled man grunted.

  “Ah, it is. This is my house and my property. Tell me who you are.” Ethan wasn’t going to back down.

  “Does she live here or not?” the man demanded. He looked older than he probably was, Ethan surmised. His scraggly beard was stringy and appeared dirty because of its coloring. Yet the woman was neat and clean, but looked tired.

  “Who is it?” Bess asked as she ran to Ethan, now wearing a pair of capri yoga pants and a tank top, her hair up in a ponytail.

  “Elizabeth?” the woman yelled, trying to peer around Ethan and into the house.

  Bess stopped dead in her tracks. Her mother was outside.

  19.

  Ethan’s jaw dropped. Bess’s mother was here? And that bastard husband of hers? His eyes darted to Bess who was still rooted to the floor in the foyer, panic written all over her face.

  “This isn’t a good time,” Ethan said to the couple on the doorstep.

  “Don’t try and bullshit us, son,” the man growled.

  “I am not your son,” Ethan spat. “And I suggest you get off my property before I call the police.”

  “We just need to talk to her,” the woman said. There was a desperation in her voice and it made Ethan curious, but not enough to put Bess in such a highly emotionally charged situation.

  “Leave your number and I’ll give it to her.”

  “We’re staying at the Travelodge just down the highway a bit,” she replied.

  “I know it,” Ethan said and shut the door. He heard the man let out a string of expletives as they walked back down the driveway. Ethan wondered where their car was, but wasn’t interested enough to let the thought dwell long. His first and only concern was Bess.

  The second the door clicked shut, Bess’s knees gave out and she fell to the floor. Violently shaking, the tears came as she sobbed uncontrollably. There was nothing that could have prepared her to hear that man speak and her body reacted without warning.

  As Ethan hurried to her, Bess vomited all over the floor, wrenching with each heave, crying and shaking. It was at that moment Ethan came to understand what her bastard stepfather had done to her. He ran to the bathroom and grabbed some towels and returned to Bess, crouching on the floor beside her. He held her hair as she vomited more and then tenderly used the towel to clean her up when she’d finally finished and all but collapsed.

  “How the hell did they find me?” she whispered shakily.

  “Just because they found you doesn’t mean you have to talk to them,” Ethan replied as he pulled her into his embrace. “You don’t have to see them.”

  “Why are they here? Why, after all these years, did they come looking for me?” She was still shaking and Ethan held her closely as he sat down behind her. “They must want something.”

  “You owe them nothing!” Ethan hissed, sounding much harsher than he’d expected. “Maybe they are here to apologize,” he offered.

  That made Bess laugh. “Never happen.”

  They sat, Bess leaning on Ethan, for a few minutes saying nothing.

  The kettle whistled and Bess broke away from his hold, stood up and walked to the kitchen. She pulled the kettle from the stove top and then returned to the foyer and to Ethan. “You’d have thought they would attempt to find me when I was easy to find. I mean, I still went to the same high school and worked at the same place. But no. No, they have to wait until I have completely moved on.” Taking a towel, she started to clean up her mess.

  “Have you completely moved on?” Ethan asked.

  “Yes! Well, maybe,” Bess replied. Except she knew that she hadn’t. The nightmares still came on occasion and her relationships were non-existent because of him, up until Ethan, of course. And even that presented some challenges for her.

  “Perhaps,” Ethan proceeded cautiously, “this may be an opportunity for you to say all the things you’ve wanted to say to them and then really move on.”

  Bess didn’t immediately reply, which had Ethan worried he’d overstepped. He was just about to apologize when Bess turned to him and said, “Maybe.”

  “You don’t have to make any decisions right now. Take some time to think about it. And remember that I will be beside you whenever you need me.”

  “I won’t be able to do it without you… even though I have no idea what it is.”

  Ethan smiled. “I am here for you.”

  “Thank you,” Bess said and went back to the comfort and safety of his arms. She felt safe with him, a feeling that was foreign to her… but welcome… very welcome.

  *****

  In less than twenty-four hours, Bess had changed her mind at least one hundred times as to whether or not she would talk to her mother. She’d listed the pros and the cons and still couldn’t stay decided for more than five minutes. As she sat at work on a typically busy Monday morning, focus was not her friend and was horrified when she asked the same question to a patient three times in a row. Her supervisor, knowing this was out of the ordinary for Bess and so there must be a reason, suggested a break and some fresh air. Bess eagerly agreed. Taking a quick walk through the courtyard would be a good idea. A small water fountain sat in the middle of the red-bricked garden, a place built for meditation and relaxation, and Bess found comfort in the constant trickling of water. She sat on a concrete bench and buried her face in her hands.

  Burying a memory and working through it so it could truly be forgotten were two different things, and Bess accepted the reality that she had not gotten over the horrific experience of her stepfather attempting to sexually assault her. She did need closure in order to move forward or she’d just be spinning her wheels in place for the rest of her life. Perhaps Ethan was right. Perhaps this was her opportunity to say all the things she didn’t say seven years ago. But the thought terrified her.

  Without allowing herself time to change her mind again, Bess reached for her cell phone in her pocket and found the number to the Travelodge. The phone rang twice and then there was someone on the other end of the line. Bess asked for Stacy Hammond’s room and suddenly it was ringing again. Her heart pounded wildly in her chest and Bess could feel the tears fill her eyes as her mother said hello.

  “It’s Bess.”

  “Elizabeth!” her mother exclaimed in surprise. “I didn’t think you’d call.”

  “I didn’t either,” Bess admitted. “Why are you in Port Linco
ln?”

  “Looking for you.”

  “Why?”

  “Um, I’d rather not talk about it on the phone,” Stacy said. “Can we come over?”

  “No!” Bess snapped. “If you would like to come and see me, alone, you can come after work, but do not bring him with you.”

  “I don’t think Mike will want to stay…”

  “I don’t give a flying fuck what he wants,” Bess interrupted. “If you want to talk, these are my terms. Take it or leave it.”

  “Okay, Elizabeth. You win.”

  Bess rolled her eyes. “Come over at five-thirty. I have thirty minutes and then your time will be up.”

  “Fine,” Stacy muttered.

  Bess disconnected the call, returned her phone to her pocket, and ran her fingers through the cool water of the fountain before she walked back to the ER.

  *****

  She couldn’t sit still. Bess paced around the house like a caged animal and Ethan could do nothing but watch her. It was breaking his heart seeing her so… so emotional and scared. It was like she was that sixteen-year-old all over again.

  Finally, there was a knock at the door and Ethan jumped up. He pulled Bess into his arms and lovingly kissed her forehead. “I’m right here. Anything you need. I’m here, babe. Always.” Then he released her and walked to the front door to let Bess’s mother in. To his surprise, she came alone. He’d doubted she would abide by her daughter’s wishes.

  Ethan led Stacy through to the family room where Bess stood standing in front of the fireplace, her arms folded in front of her, a challenging beginning for Stacy.

  “Hello, Elizabeth,” Stacy said. “You are looking well.”

  “I guess you’re lucky you didn’t see me a few months ago then,” Bess replied, bitterness lacing her voice.

  “Why? What happened a few months ago?”

  “I had cancer.”

  “What? But you look fine,” Stacy remarked.

  “She is now,” Ethan jumped in after seeing Bess start to lose her nerve. “She was a very sick woman and had been for some time. It’s too bad she didn’t have any family to help her out.” He walked to her, stood beside her, and placed his arm around her waist, drawing her into his side. The protectiveness he felt wasn’t lost on Stacy.

  “She obviously has you,” Stacy smirked.

  “What do you want, mom?” Bess sighed. “You obviously need something or you wouldn’t have bothered finding me.”

  “May I sit down?” Stacy asked.

  “Whatever,” Bess shrugged.

  “Your brother is ill.”

  Bess waited for her to go on, but she said nothing more.

  “And?” Ethan asked.

  “He needs a bone marrow transplant, and your father and I are not suitable matches.”

  Bess laughed under her breath and shook her head.

  “He has leukemia?” Ethan asked.

  Stacy nodded.

  “And you want Bess to be tested to see if she’s a viable match?” he asked.

  Stacy nodded again.

  “Anything else?” Bess asked her mother.

  This time, Stacy shook her head.

  “You can go now,” Bess said, all emotion removed from her voice. “I will call you tomorrow.” She turned away from the room and stared into the fireplace.

  Ethan released her from his hold and walked Stacy to the front door, locking it after she’d left.

  “She’s got balls,” Ethan noted with slight disgust.

  “Amazing,” Bess shook her head. “Just amazing.”

  “You can’t donate, even if you’re a match.”

  “I can’t?” Bess turned around, startled.

  “You’re being treated for cancer. No doctor will allow you to even be tested. You are not a possibility.”

  “So I don’t have to decide?” Bess looked enormously relieved.

  “I’ve already made the decision for you. And if I hadn’t, Eric would have. Technically, he’s your doctor, but I know the answer. Absolutely not!”

  The look of relief on Bess’s face slowly turned to one of concern. “What will he do?”

  “Who?”

  “My brother,” Bess squeaked. “Will he die?”

  Ethan scooped her into his arms. “I don’t know,” he whispered into her hair as he held her to his chest.

  “Great,” Bess whimpered. “I can’t help him.”

  “It was wrong of your mother to even ask you,” Ethan grunted. “Very wrong.”

  “Yeah, well,” Bess muttered into his chest. “I’m not one bit surprised. But now I have to figure out how to tell her that I can’t help.”

  After several minutes of just holding her, Ethan grudgingly released her. “I have to go back to the hospital and finish up some patient stuff and dictation. Are you gonna be okay?”

  Bess nodded. “I think I’ll take a bath and make it an early night. Maybe a cup of soup for dinner and just crash.”

  Ethan kissed her, a sweet but lingering kiss, and then left for the hospital. Bess filled the tub in her bathroom and sunk her weary body into the hot water. She was emotionally drained and needed some time to rejuvenate.

  It would be difficult to tell her mother that she was not an option to save her brother’s life. Bess wondered if her mother would accept her reason at face value, or just make the assumption that Bess wouldn’t help. The choice had been made for her. Ethan had said so himself, but she doubted Stacy would see it that way. And him? Well he’d be livid with her, but what else was new?

  Bess eventually pulled the plug and let the now-cool bathwater drain away. She put on her comfy PJ bottoms and an old t-shirt and was walking back to the kitchen when she stopped at the foot of the staircase.

  Andrew met her as she stepped onto the landing at the top of the stairs.

  “What’s wrong?” he asked, seeing the crease in her forehead.

  “Why can’t we choose our family? Why do we have to be stuck with people we can’t stand and want nothing to do with?”

  Andrew stared at her for a moment before answering. “Sometimes, the people we love and are there for us in times of need are not those with whom we share blood.”

  “Ain’t that the truth!”

  “What is it, Elizabeth?” There was great concern in his voice.

  “My younger brother is sick.”

  “Go on.”

  “And I can’t help him. He needs a bone marrow transplant and I am not an option to give him what he needs.”

  “I have no understanding of this medicine but, you are upset that you cannot help him?”

  “Right,” Bess nodded.

  “Are you close to your brother?”

  “I haven’t seen him in over seven years.”

  “So why do you feel… guilty?”

  “Shouldn’t I feel guilty?”

  Andrew turned and walked down the hallway to his preferred bedroom. Bess followed.

  “What does Ethan think?”

  “So, does Ethan know about you?” Bess asked curiously.

  “No, and don’t change the subject.”

  “You never allowed him to see you?”

  Andrew shook his head. “He was hardly here and there was never a reason. Why would you feel guilty about not helping someone you barely know?”

  Bess shrugged.

  “So you feel guilty because you think you should?”

  “I don’t want him to die!”

  “Of course you don’t. But that doesn’t mean you should allow guilt to weigh you down. It is terribly sad when family members get sick. I lost my brother and sister to illness when they were children. I was sad, yes, but not guilty.”

  “It’s different. I potentially could help him… maybe.”

  “But you can’t help?”

  “No. Ethan says with the cancer treatments and medicine I am taking I am not a viable option, as he puts it.”

  “Well, then, there’s nothing more to discuss. It’s done.”

  “I suppose
so,” Bess sighed.

  “When Lizzie died, there was more sadness than I knew there could be. But there was no guilt. People get sick. They do. It is part of life… and death.”

  “How did she die?” Bess wanted to hear the story, hoping that Andrew would share more of his story with her.

  “A fever. It began as a cough and then progressively became worse until she died. There was nothing anybody could do.”

  Bess could see the utter sadness in his eyes and hear it in his voice. “Sounds like pneumonia… or TB. I’m so very sorry.”

  “That’s what started the chain of events that has caused me to remain here… in this house… since that dreadful day,” he muttered.

  “Her death?” Bess wasn’t following.

  “It’s a long story.”

  “I have time,” Bess quickly replied. “And I’d love to not think about those people who claim to be my family. I’d love a distraction… if you don’t mind sharing your story, that is.”

  “I don’t mind sharing it with you,” Andrew said. “I don’t know why, but I enjoy speaking with you.”

  His statement made Bess chuckle. “Is that some kind of backhanded compliment?”

  Andrew stared at her, a look of confusion flashed across his face. “Ah… no, I don’t think so.”

  “Tell me what happened when Lizzie died.”

  The room fell silent. Andrew walked to the window and gazed out at the highway then turned and walked to the other side of the room and to the window that overlooked the cliffs and the ocean beyond. He did not immediately speak and Bess observed the pain he was obviously in as he thought of that difficult time. She didn’t press him, just waited until he was ready to talk.

  It took several minutes.

  “It was late in the evening when Lizzie took her last breaths. I wasn’t by her side.” A silent sob caught in the back of his throat and Bess’s heart broke for him.

  “I was in the other room playing with my daughter.”

  “Your daughter?” Bess gasped.

  Andrew nodded and attempted a smile. He failed.

  “I didn’t know about her until I arrived here and saw Lizzie with her. It was a complete shock.”

  “But you were already…”