Changing Lanes (Highway 17 #1)

by Leaona Luxx

  “Well, it doesn’t look like you took any. You must’ve been exhausted,” Lea says after checking the bottle.

  “All we know is you had an argument. He’s called for two days, and you wouldn’t answer the gate or your door when the guard came to check on you,” Thayer recalls the story. “Oh, and you slapped the hell outta Ava. We liked that part.”

  “Oh, shit. I did slap the taste out of her mouth, twat. I can’t begin to tell you how badly I hate her.” I take a drink of water. “He didn’t tell you the entire story?”

  They shake their heads in unison. “No, he didn’t. And you don’t have to tell us either, we’re here for you, not your story,” Thayer says.

  “Besides, Torrie. You have nothing to be ashamed of, you don’t know my story. Or Hardy’s. Life is hard, carrying your mistakes with you will always become too heavy a load,” Lea tells me.

  “Mine’s bad. I’m sure it’s so much worse than yours,” I try to explain.

  “Mine’s pretty bad. But, Torrie, it’s my story, of course, it’s gonna hurt me. Hardy’s hurts him. When life scars you so badly, it stays with you forever. It’s going to hurt to tell it, but it doesn’t define you,” Lea tells me.

  “It’s the part of my heart that’s still in pieces.” My tears begin to fall again.

  “Torrie, some of us are only made from pieces. Things left over from what tried to kill us. But we’re here. Whether we’re in pieces or on our way to being whole again. We’re here.” Lea pushes my hair from my face to dry it.

  “I told you I bought a pregnancy test because I thought I was pregnant.” I nod my head at them, they nod back. “I was pregnant. I lost him. I buried him on a cold winter’s day, all by myself. Brannon thinks I’m jealous of Ava, I’m only jealous because she gets to have what I may never get the chance to have again.” Lea puts her arms around me as Thayer takes my hand.

  They sit with me like this for hours, as I once again mourn my baby boy.

  Helping me to the shower, Thayer stays with me while Lea orders some food. I have two pregnant women here who haven’t eaten in hours, this might get ugly. We sit together on my couch, just talking. When the gate buzzes, I assume it’s One for the girls.

  They both offer to stay with me, I already feel bad enough. I still can’t believe I’ve been out for two days, I must’ve been exhausted. I greet One at the door, and he pulls me into a hug. I’ve never met people like this in my life.

  “You okay?” One asks as the ladies get their shoes on.

  “I’m okay, well, I will be.” I give him a smile.

  “Brannon’s here. It’s not my business, but I think you should talk.” He gives me the saddest look.

  “I don’t know.” Dropping my head, I shake it.

  “Torrie, ten years are gone. The things you both have lost are too great a number, do you still want to add to the count?” One is blunt but tells me what I need to hear.

  “Tell him to come in, just wait a minute before you leave. Please.” I frown when I ask.

  “No problem.” He gives me a reassuring smile before texting Brannon to come.

  Brannon steps up on the porch, he looks as bad as I do. “Come on in, I guess we have some unfinished business.” I swing the door wide.

  “Thank you, I won’t stay long if you don’t want me to,” Brannon offers.

  “Since when does halfway ever work with us?” I chuckle.

  “Alright, y’all. I need to get my sister home and my wife to our kids. Be good to each other.” One hugs me again and pats Brannon on the back.

  Closing the door, I turn to Brannon. “Would you like a drink?” I ask as I walk over and pour myself some orange juice.

  “No, thank you. I’m good.” He frowns as he shakes his head.

  I motion to the couch. “Want to sit? Or just do it here?”

  “Yes, we can sit, please.” He allows me to walk before him, but he doesn’t sit down. Why is he acting so awkward?

  “I’m okay, Brannon. Stop with the weird shit,” huffing, I sit down.

  His eyes bug out. “You’re okay? Excuse me, but how in the hell are you okay? I’m fucking dying over here.”

  Shit, of course he is. “I’m sorry. I know you’ve had a lot to process.”

  “How are you really?” he asks sincerely.

  Folding my legs under me, I take a minute to gather myself. Still, the tears come. “I’m shit. I feel like it anyway. I’m sorry, Brannon. So many times I’ve wanted to tell you, but I didn’t know how.”

  Brannon kneels beside me on the floor, still not touching me. “I wished you would have. But, Torrie, I should’ve been there. I should’ve called or came back to talk to you.”

  “I would’ve never told you, not if you told me she was pregnant. That’s how it would’ve gone.” I shrug.

  Torrie looks horrible, she’s so distraught about this mess we’ve made of our lives. I’m as much responsible as she is, why is she carrying all the blame? Truth be told, it’s all my fault. Seriously, what asshole gets two girls pregnant? Me.

  “Torrie, you did nothing wrong, baby. This was far from your fault.” I want to hold her for all the times I didn’t. For me.

  “But… I didn’t tell you. You don’t even know his name.” Her tears fall fast and hard as her lips tremble. My heart breaks for her.

  “Do you want to tell me?” Please, tell me. I’m dying over here to be close to you, here and now.

  She nods. “Adan Winston O’Hurley.” She sniffles. “I hope it was okay I gave him your last name. And Adan is Irish.”

  God love this girl’s heart, so broken but still thinking of everyone else. “Oh, baby. It’s perfect.” The irony of the fact Adan is the brother to Andi doesn’t escape me.

  “You think?” She wipes her tears as they fall, I want to hold her.

  “I do. I will never forgive myself for not being there, Torrie. Too damn stubborn to call, too worried about what you would say to me after I walked away. I’m sorry. God above knows how sorry I am, baby.” Trying to be strong for her, I hold back my tears. But one look at her, they fall.

  I grip the couch, trying to not touch her until she tells me I can. “You couldn’t have stopped it, I wasn’t meant to have him.”

  “Torrie, you would’ve been a fantastic mother.” She shakes her head. “Ask Andi. She tells me every day, she wishes you were her momma.” Bowing my head, I try to calm myself. I’m here for Torrie.

  When her hand finds my face, I lean into it. It’s such a comforting feeling. I lift my head and my eyes lock on hers. I can’t take another minute, I scoop her up in my arms. Sitting her in my lap, I wrap my arms around her.

  Torrie releases a sob she has repressed nearly ten years. There’s no more fighting, no more anger.

  In the middle of her living room floor, we lose our son together but find each other once again. We lay there, forgetting the world, just the two of us. Torrie’s whimpering demolishes any thoughts of my hurt, my woman needs me to be strong.

  Her strength has been unimaginable. Women are curious, mystical creatures. We should be indebted to them for even considering taking us on. She is the epitome of strength and beauty. I stand in awe of her determination to not give up, to not walk away from everyone who’s hurt her.

  Every time you think a woman is beyond repair, put her family against the wall. Her strength will rise from the ashes.

  Picking her up, I carry her to the bathroom. Sitting her on the sink, I grab a washcloth, wetting it for her face. She tries to take it from me, but I refuse. Taking my time, I run the cloth over her face, moving pieces of her hair as I do it.

  “There’s my girl.” Bending to catch her eyes, I’m awarded a small smile. “Hi, baby.” I kiss her on the forehead before carrying her back to the living room.

  “You do know, I can walk,” she chides me.

  “I do know.” I smirk. “Are you hungry? Or do you feel like talking some?”

  Shrugging, she gives me no answer. “I don’t know.”


  “What do you need?” She shrugs again. “Torrie, if you’re waiting for me to forgive you, I can’t.”

  She stares at me. “You can’t? I knew it. I don’t blame you.”

  “No. There’s nothing to forgive. You did what I did, you took care of things. I hate I wasn’t there, but it can’t be fixed now. I’m sorry you went through it alone, to think you felt as though you couldn’t tell me; well that’s on me.

  “I made a mess out of this, Torrie. I didn’t have to leave, I could’ve waited or even come found you. I was angry, like you, that we were torn apart. As much as I like to blame your father, it was our fault it happened,” I explain.

  “I know. I’ve been angry with everyone for so long, I’ve forgotten how not to be. It was easier to hate myself and blame both of you. I’m sorry I didn’t tell you.” Torrie’s tears begin falling again.

  I hesitate but then ask, “How far along were you?”

  “Twenty weeks. There was so much blood, that’s why I was in the hospital an extra day.” I nod as she wipes her face.

  “I can’t imagine you being alone, it breaks my heart.” Hugging her to me, tears fill my eyes.

  “After, I was numb for the longest time.” Her voice quivers.

  “I should’ve come found you,” I say, kissing her forehead.

  “Stop it already. We both made poor choices. I know I did when I smacked Ava. I’m sorry. She give you a ton of shit over it?” she asks.

  “Oh, yeah. But no one has ever deserved it as much as she did.” That brings a smile to her face as we chuckle.

  “So, now what?” Her eyes are everywhere but on me. I nudge her chin, coaxing her to look at me.

  “We’re okay. This hasn’t broken us, it’s another chapter. I’d like to go to his grave at some point.” Her eyes stray again. “If I can, would you go with me?”

  “Yes, of course. You need to go.” She hesitates, and I wait. “I’m not sure I can have children now, Brannon. I need you to understand, I may have problems like my mother.”

  “Well, then, we have a son and a daughter, we’ll be fine.” I search her eyes until it hits her that we really are gonna be okay. Leaning in, I wait for her acceptance and then I kiss her.

  We spend the evening talking, trying to clear this hurdle completely. She answers my questions about the birth and loss of our son. Down to counting his fingers and toes. I hold her when she cries again, she holds me when I do.

  “I’m afraid we won’t make it past this.” She frowns at her words.

  “We will. With hard work and love, we’ll be fine.” I say as I wipe away her fallen tears. The biggest mistake people make is telling someone they forgive when they haven’t. If you’ve forgiven someone, move past it. If you say it but bring the mistake up with every disagreement, then you haven’t forgiven a damn thing.

  Forgiveness can be easy to offer but hard to accept.

  “So, I slept for two days, what does that mean?” Her brow is cock as she sits amazed.

  “Probably means you’re tired. But don’t quote me on it.” Rolling her eyes, she hands me a bottle of water.

  “You’re ridiculous. Does your mom know?” Torrie won’t look at me, she can’t evade everything.

  I clear my throat to get her attention. “She does. She hurts for us.”

  “I’m sorry.” She stares into the distance, thinking. Torrie will always feel guilty about this.

  “Torrie, we’re okay. I love you just as much as I would if he were here with us. The only thing that’s changed here is the fact we have a child.” I smile at her with glassy eyes.

  She leans in, running her cheek over mine. Grazing my nose with hers, she brushes her lips with mine. Her eyes on mine, burning me. I take her face in my hands, gazing into her eyes. Her tears run free, over and around my fingers.

  I pull her closer to me, her skin on mine. Brushing her lips now with mine, I look for her acceptance. She closes her eyes, then opens them with the same burning desire as I have. I’m so in love with her, I hope she knows. In case she’s doubting me, I show her again.

  Placing my lips on hers every so lightly, I press mine to hers. Praying she won’t let go, I hold tight to her. Starving for her, I raid her mouth with my tongue. Swirling and lapping at hers as if it were my life source. She breaks free from her self-serving defenses.

  Laying her down, I cover her body with mine, our hands find purchase on every inch of flesh showing. Working for more skin to skin, I begin taking her clothes off as she works on mine. Kissing her, I work my way down her body. Small licks with every tender kiss.

  “I think it’s time I take care of you,” she says as she pushes me off her.

  “Oh, how’s that?” I smirk as she straddles me.

  “I’m more of a show than tell kinda girl.” Bending to place her lips on mine.

  She doesn’t stop there. Working her lips to the side of my mouth, she trails them over my chin to the bend of my neck. Lingering for a bit, she continues down my chest. Taking my nipple in her mouth, she lavishes it with her hot tongue.

  Moving down over my abs, she places a sweet kiss on my navel. Then kisses just below it, getting my cock to jump. “Calm down, buddy. I’m on my way.” I chuckle, not wanting to. She kisses my pelvic bone, running her nails down each side of my body.

  Her hot breath sweeps over the head of my cock, and I bite my lip. The tip of her tongue touches my shaft, again, it jumps and sways. Her touch cools the air on her wet lips, she licks them. and I go insane at the thought of having them on me.

  Her hands wrap around me, sitting me up straight. She winks and bends over, her mouth covering me. She slides down me, hot and wet. Her tongue darting out to lick the base. Bringing her head up, she releases me from her mouth, swirling her tongue around me.

  It cups me, making me hot and wet. Her perfect pout forming to kiss the head, she slides over it, sucking like a lollipop. The suction making it pop when she begins her descent over me again. Taking all she can, she bobs her head as I glide in and out of her mouth.

  Her tongue swirling and caressing me from tip to base. Making me incredibly harder with every pass of her mouth. Smiling at me, her teeth are clenched around my tip. I didn’t think I could get harder but turns out, it’s possible.

  She widens her tongue as she laps at the head, running down it once again. “Torrie, I’m going come.” Her fuckin’ wicked smile gets me every time, and I grasp the rug beneath me.

  “Not yet, country boy. Have I ever told you, I can a ride a horse?” Fuck me.

  She settles over me, my cock in her hand, guiding me into her. Pressing down, she’s filled with me. Adjusting herself, she begins to sway her hips. Back and forth, she moves slowly. I hold her hips, allowing her to set the pace.

  She builds slowly, pacing herself with her breathing. Her movements become exaggerated as she climbs her orgasm. I meet her downs with a thrust to which I’m rewarded with a moan.

  Her hips begin to bounce from my thighs as her pace races for her orgasm, to which I follow. Her hands on my chest, mine in her hair, we meet the same fate as she explodes on me and I fill her. She slumps over on my chest, still straddling me.

  We lay there as our hearts beat together. I can’t help but think of Adan, our beating hearts combine to make one. He will forever be our missing beat, to which mine skips. Torrie raises, studying me. Placing her hand over my heart, I put mine on her stomach. We both know no words are needed.

  Time feels as though it stands still as we lay here; we know the world will come beckoning soon. Neither of us wanting to move, I curl into his side as we watch the sun fade into the ocean and darkness creeps in the room. Brannon shifts slightly, I look up at him.

  “Hey, I need to grab my phone to call Mom.” I move to get up.

  She reaches over, grabbing hers. “Use mine. I’m too tired to let you move.”

  I laugh as she giggles. “Okay.” I dial the number.

  “Hello.” Mom practically smiles through the phone.

&nbs
p; “Hi, Mom. I’m going to stay with Torrie tonight.” Torrie snuggles closer to me.

  “I assumed from the number,” she says. “How’s our girl doing?” My mom is a saint.

  “She’s okay, we both are I suppose. At least, the best we can be.” I hold Torrie tight.

  “I understand.” Her voice cracks. “I have someone here who wants to talk.”

  “Hi, Dad. Do you have Torrie?” Torrie’s head jerks up at the sound of Andi’s voice.

  “Hi, Andi Pandi. I do, she’s right here beside me.” I rub Torrie’s back. To my surprise, she speaks.

  “Hi, baby girl. I miss you.” My heart skips a beat.

  “Hi, I miss you. You coming home with Dad?” Andi asks.

  “We’ll talk about that later, sweetie,” I say before Torrie interrupts me.

  “I’ll be home tomorrow, baby,” Torrie answers sweetly.

  “Okay. I love you. I love you, Dad.” Andi sounds happy.

  “I love you,” Torrie and I say in unison, to which we laugh.

  “Brannon, tell our girl, I love her,” my mom says.

  “I love you, Joyce,” Torrie answers.

  “Love you, Mom,” I add.

  “Love you.” We hang up.

  The next morning, Brannon drives back to the farm to take Andi to school. The lingering cloud that is my father hovers, black and ominous. Our time here is winding down. I need to figure out what I’m going to do with this mess I’ve created with him.

  I have a video conference with my dad, walking the property so he can see the progress. Soon after, I run over to the office to see Brannon. Wanting to give everyone an update on my father’s thoughts and to check on the final stint of work. Brannon sits at his desk, working on a new design. I tiptoe over, covering his eyes.

  “You can have two guesses as to who this is.” I giggle when he jumps.

  “Ummm, let me think.” He reaches up to feel my hand. “I’m hoping a woman or I might add, sir, you have great hands.”

  “Ha, ha, ha. You’re funny. Guess,” I pout as I stomp my foot.

  “There are only two women who could make my heart race like this, so it’s either Jessica Biel or Torrence Harrington.” He wraps his hand around my wrist, yanking me into his lap as he spins his chair.