by Judi Nolan
She took refuge in her glass. The potency of the wine seemed to be going straight to her head. An odd sense of unreality began to float up through her senses as she watched Spencer work.
Inside her chest, her heart was doing odd things. She tried to suppress its sudden leap of breathtaking excitement. She couldn't afford to lose her wariness around this man. It could lead to disaster for both of them.
But dressed in black trousers and a cream open necked shirt, Spencer was undeniably handsome and attractive, more potent that the heady wine in her glass. And his slow smile when he looked up at her was disrupting her ability to keep her thoughts in order.
She was beginning to lose track of which man was the real Spencer Stelanos. The charming pirate standing before her once more tonight, or the thoroughly professional physician with the no nonsense approach to all he did. Either man was going to confuse her ability to think straight if she allowed him to settle permanently in the secret recesses of her mind.
Kate looked around, wishing she had perfected the art of making small talk about inconsequential things. "Where's Jamie?"
It was a relief to have Spencer's son appear at her elbow. The boy had been outside kenneling his dog.
"Come on, Auntie Kate. Let's set the table." He took her hand, drawing her into the large adjacent dining room.
She caught her breath. "Oh, how lovely."
The table was set with candles and a low bowl of water that floated delicate, intensely colored tuberous begonia flowers. Spencer had obviously been busy.
Good heaven; the man certainly knows how to impress.
"I helped too." Jamie looked up at her.
Kate ruffled his curls. "I'm sure you did."
"Do you like your cottage, Auntie Kate?"
She saw the little boy watching her with wistful eyes and her heart contracted. "I'm only going to be at the cottage for a few weeks. Then I need to find a place of my own."
The boy hitched a sigh. "I know, Papa told me that. He said you can't stay all the time. Said you had other plans."
"No, Jamie. I can't stay there forever." Kate didn't know what else to say. "Soon, I'll need to find somewhere of my own."
She found the simple task of helping him to set out place mats and cutlery all she could handle. It kept her hands occupied, if not her mind. At the edge of her vision she could still see Spencer moving purposefully around in the kitchen.
To her surprise, he turned out to be an excellent cook.
"That was delicious. Thank you." Unable to eat another bite of the chilled fruit dessert she finally pushed her plate away. "When did you find the time to make everything?"
Spencer reached to pour her another glass of wine. "I'm grateful you didn't make the assumption I bought it ready-made from the supermarket."
"Wouldn't dream of it." Kate couldn't help smiling as she sipped her wine. Its heady warmth curled through her senses, making her feel decidedly light headed. Just as well she wasn't driving tonight.
She tilted her head to one side. "And did you? Buy it from the supermarket, I mean?"
"No, believe it or not, I'm quite domesticated. My mother insisted I learn to cook. You look surprised."
"No, not at all."
How could she say that the ability to cook a decent meal simply added to this man's already disastrous appeal?
Eric had been unable to boil water. It had always been an issue of contention between them in the months they'd lived together. She would come home from a long, heavy day at the hospital and he would be waiting impatiently for her to begin preparing their evening meal.
She pushed the unwelcome thought aside. She didn't want to think anymore about her ex-fiancé tonight. Beyond their similarities in appearance and build, she was beginning to realize Spencer was nothing like her erstwhile lover.
She sipped her wine, feeling the delicious sense of unreality intensifying. It was almost like flying, she decided, a trifle unsteadily—without the benefit of a parachute.
"You cooked, so Jamie and I can clear the table," she insisted, as she stood quickly.
"And you're our guest." Spencer also rose to his feet. "So I guess that makes us even."
Kate couldn't find an answer. So they shared the very domestic task of clearing the table and setting the dishwasher in motion.
"Coffee?" Spencer raised a dark brow half an hour later.
"No...thank you. It's getting late. I really should be going."
Everything inside her seemed to catch fire in that moment. It was well past time for her to make her polite excuses and leave. She'd lingered too long and had drunk a little too much wine. Everything seemed to be passing her in slow motion and her limbs refused to obey the dictates of her rational mind. A delicious sense of irresponsibility swamped her caution.
"It's still early." Spencer shrugged. "I'm sure your boss will understand. But if you're sure you can't stay..."
Kate swallowed. "Yes, quite sure, I—"
"Do you know how to play cards, Auntie Kate?" Jamie's hopeful question squeezed her heart as he came closer to slip his small hand into hers. "I want us to play some."
Kate's fingers closed tightly on his. Spencer's cool eyes were still fixed on her face, as if he was trying to gauge the level of her discomfort. Kate felt trapped by roiling indecision. She didn't want to give the impression she was running away. That she was some kind of coward.
"Cards," she mused throatily, smiling at Jamie. "Well, I will admit to being a little rusty. But I think I could manage a hand or two."
"We don't mind rusty, do we, Jamie?"
Kate pursed her lips. She was deeply suspicious of the shared look of understanding between father and son. Her dark suspicions were soon confirmed. After two hours of being soundly trounced by a gleeful five-year-old at every card game Kate could remember from her childhood, the little boy's head began to nod.
"Time for bed, champ." Spencer rose from his chair.
"Good night, Auntie Kate." Jamie came around the table to throw his small arms around her neck.
"Good night." Kate returned the boy's tight embrace and rose. "I should be going too. Thank you both for a lovely evening. Next time, my place." It was a rash promise she had no idea how to keep. She had to rejoin the land of the living some day soon, right?
Spencer's frowning look was unreadable, making her fear she'd said the wrong thing. Then he shrugged. "This won't take long, Jamie's out on his feet. Stay for a few more minutes. You look like you could use some coffee."
Kate knew she shouldn't agree. She gripped the back of her chair, feeling her stomach twist and tumble with a strange surge of conflicting emotion.
"Don't go." Spencer's dark look held her in place before he took his son and left the room, not waiting for her answer.
Kate stared after him. He seemed determined to make her leaving not an option. She could only guess at the reason why. She was still hovering uncertainly when he came back into the room. As his eyes found hers, he exhaled a deep breath, almost as if he expected her to have left already. Taken the coward's path and fled while she had the chance.
Kate began to wish she had. She shuddered. "So, what now?"
"Are you always this suspicious of other people's motives?"
"Only when I have no idea what they have in mind."
"Coffee." Spencer shrugged. "What else do you think I want?"
Kate's heart gave a funny little thump. Her brain felt as if it was strung with cobwebs. He was being deliberately obtuse. "I have no idea."
"That makes two of us," Spencer replied cryptically, moving away to make the coffee before filling two small crystal glasses from a long necked green bottle.
He returned to place the coffee mugs on the table. "I can't stop wondering who once hurt you so badly that you can't even begin to trust me."
"No one did anything to me." It was herself she didn't trust, Kate thought raggedly, watching him pour her coffee. She was getting way out of her depth in this strange conversation. The wine she'd
consumed fizzed lightly through her system. She took a grateful sip of the black brew in her cup.
"I will understand, you know?" Spencer said softly.
Kate blinked, looking up. "Understand?"
"Whatever it is you find so difficult to say. Every time I come close, you look ready to bolt as if I'm some kind of monster. I could never hurt you, Kate. Surely you understand that."
"I'm just happier with my own company." She braved his searching look. "It's how I am. I prefer it that way. No strings, no heartache."
"No strings?" Spencer's lifted eyebrows disbelieved her. "Ah huh. And what about Eric?"
"Eric...?" Kate blinked, her voice trembling over the single repeated word. She didn't want to have this conversation.
She watched Spencer run his fingers through his dark hair. "You mentioned him the other night. When you came over to look after Jamie. You started to say 'Eric and I'...then you clammed up. Was it him, Kate?"
Kate closed her eyes. "I...no, it was a long time ago." She lifted her shoulders in a denying gesture. "I don't wish to talk about it tonight."
She watched him watching her, his face full of frowning disbelief. Kate waited, her heart pounding heavily against the cage of her ribs. She should leave, but she felt rooted to the spot.
Spencer finally nodded. "Fair enough."
He held out her glass filled with an amber liquid. "Drink this and then you can go home."
Run away, his harsh tone seemed to imply. Kate frowned, ignoring the implication. But as she reached to take the glass, her hand encountered his long fingers. The contact shivered like fire along her nerve endings. She couldn't prevent the soft groan that feathered past her lips.
She heard Spencer inhale sharply. That was all it took.
He reached for her, sliding his free hand along her forearm, clasping her elbow as he drew her slowly towards him.
Kate resisted. "What are you doing?"
"Settling something in my mind," Spencer replied harshly, bringing her inexorably closer.
He took the untouched glass from her hand, placing it beside his own on the table behind them. Kate trembled as she stared up into his face. Her senses reeled, becoming tangled in the smoky depths of his eyes.
"Settling something?" she breathed. "What...something?"
"Just how you'll taste," he replied, his dark head dipping toward hers. "When I do this..."
Kate tried to hold back. Her mouth went dry. She licked at her lips.
"Do that again, Kate..." Spencer groaned, his head dipping lower.
"No..." Kate folded her lips together in denial. She wouldn't play these disturbing sensual games with him. He was amusing himself at her expense. She held back from temptation. "I really do need to go."
"Not yet," Spencer exhaled. "Not like this." He compressed his lips. Why did she affect him so much? What is it about Kate?
She looked like Katerina, that fact he had been forced to accept. But he was beginning to understand that Kate was very different from his ex-wife. She was smaller and more direct and he always knew what she was thinking. The sensuous puzzle that she created in his mind itched against his ability to reason it away with logic. What he felt for Kate wasn't logical. But it felt right.
None of it made any sense at all. He should put her aside and step back. Create the necessary distance between them and let her run away back to the safety of her neat and tidy life. But if he didn't kiss her right now he knew he would come apart at the seams.
Something of his inner turmoil must have shown in his eyes. He saw a strong shudder run through Kate as she shook her head from side to side.
Kate felt her breathing cut out. She wanted him.
There, she thought hazily, she'd just admitted it. If only to herself. She wanted him with a confusing passion that frankly scared her. The man's physical attraction was undeniable. Would one intoxicating kiss hurt so much? Maybe it was just the tonic her confused senses needed right now.
Spencer seemed to sense her voiceless compliance. His dark head came down closer to hers, his lips opened enticingly across the corner of her mouth, his teeth nibbling at the fullness of her lower lip. Kate wanted to keep her own lips pressed together, within the bounds of safety, but she was lost before she even began.
The air between them began to heat. The blatant sensuality of his mouth brushed lightly over hers. Lifted briefly, then came right back for more, tantalizing and teasing.
Despite the raw need rampaging through his senses, Spencer managed to drop his hands down to his sides. Their lips made the only bodily contact between them. Against the raw power of his desire surging within him, he was intent on allowing Kate the necessary space to pull back.
If she wanted to.
The sensual look of confusion in her blue eyes when he'd come closer played havoc with his senses. It created knots in his stomach and made his heart pound. He already knew Kate Martin was far too dangerous. To his peace of mind, his determination to stay away from anything that remotely resembled a relationship.
But she was also slender and feisty and so very sweet. Her soft beauty tempted him as Katerina's taller frame and more obvious looks never had. Spencer played his mouth slowly across hers and bit back a groan of intense need. He felt Kate shudder against him as her body collided against his, but she remained passive. She seemed unsure of what to do next.
Spencer's rational mind studied the troubling fact and stored it away. This wasn't the time to wonder about what the absent Eric had done to her. He prayed the man hadn't touched her in any way she didn't want, but he was sure the man had. Some men didn't know their own capabilities to hurt the woman they professed to love for some perversity of their own.
His mind roiled with a thousand more unanswerable questions. And he felt turned on and alive for the first time in years. It was still just a kiss, he reasoned. He could soon end it, put her aside and step back. But he didn't want to, not yet. Not when this felt so new and so right.
What could it hurt to give in to a little temptation once in a while? He wasn't a monk. Or a saint!
Kate's system roiled with shock. And something else. Something warm and insidious she wasn't about to tag with a name. Or dare to acknowledge. Surely it was only the wine...
She inhaled the tang of his aftershave and blatant masculinity. She felt captured. Trapped. The man certainly knew how to catch a girl off guard and make her want more than was good for her.
His lips enticed, exploring her trembling softness, begging a response Kate fought not to give. Eric had always taken, pushed for what he wanted, his own desires and completion. When he didn't get what he wanted he'd resorted to threats and raised fists. He'd never once thought to beguile her into responding to his advances with this intoxicating form of sensuous play, taken the time to heat her desire to the point of outright begging.
She felt Spencer shift against her mouth as he moved closer, his hips framing hers, his mouth deepening the kiss, slowly destroying her resolve to push him away. Her hands lifted of their own accord, flattening out over the steady thunder of his heartbeat. Her own pulse was now racing in overdrive.
"Kate...?" Spencer lifted his mouth, whispering short kisses across her cheekbone before he pulled back to look down at her. "You want this..."
Kate shivered, drowning in his intent gaze. It was full of stark questions. Bold rich promises she knew he couldn't keep. But his burning look of want made her toes curl, along with other things within her that began to heat and unfurl, relaxing her closer against the hard wide plane of his chest where his heart beat like a drum against her ribs. Her fingers spread out, testing the strength of the muscles flexing beneath her questing touch, allowing her feel the power of his response and know she didn't need to be afraid.
It would be so easy to go on accepting, wanting and needing more from this man, more than he was offering. Could she––?
"No. No!" Kate swallowed, shaking her head. "I don't..."
"Liar..." His lips traced over the trembling cor
ners of her mouth. "Ah, Kate, why do you tempt me so...?"
She must have given another little moan of protest then, because the next moment she was drawn deep within his arms. Spencer enclosed her within his embrace, gathering her in hard against him from hip to chest.
His lips tempted and plundered, waking every one of Kate's nerve endings to screaming point. He enticed her response with his tongue, teasing at her sealed lips until she couldn't take any more.
"Spencer..." She opened her mouth, allowing him access to the soft, inner recesses even as her hands rose to cup and caress the shape of his face and throat.
His fingers splayed out along the line of her spine, curling and bunching into the soft fabric of her shirt, dragging the hem above the waistband of her trousers, pushing beneath to caress the silky warmth of her bare skin. His fingers traced the line of her hips before rising to encircle her waist, his probing thumbs brushing over the undersides of her breasts, flicking lightly across their straining points.
Kate moaned deep in her throat as she felt her whole world shift. Her desperate hands latched onto his solidness. At the broad sweep of his shoulders. The strong corded column of his throat, where his warm flesh pulsed with life, as she reached to cup the firm shape of his jaw within her trembling palms, threading her fingers upwards into his hair.
Conflicting emotions swept through her, painting sensual images behind her closed eyelids. Images that threatened to take her legs from beneath her. She burrowed closer, her hips grazing blindly across his in sensuous invitation. Another tiny sound of burgeoning need escaped her control.
Time spun away. Spencer's slow withdrawal, his deep groan of regret, even after he lifted his mouth from hers took Kate by surprise.
"Kate...no." He dragged in a deep lungful of air, playing his mouth along the angle of her jaw-line. "We can't. We have to stop this. Right here, right now."
His hands moved around over the bare skin beneath her ribcage. He tugged the hem of her shirt back into place, fastening the buttons before settling his grip firmly on her waist outside her clothing.
Kate understood his determined withdrawal. It was necessary. None of this was right. There could be nothing between them. Nothing tangible, nothing she could hold onto.