“I leave you for, what; thirty minutes and you’re dancing with another man?” His face hardened.
I narrow my eyes at him. Two can play that game. “I leave you for, what; ten minutes, and you disappear with another woman?”
The corners of his mouth turn up in that sexy grin of his. I play my best poker face.
“Who was she?” I ask when he doesn’t reply.
“A friend.” Is all he says.
The song ends and we walk back to the table that is now crowded with people. The first person I notice is Melissa sitting next to Grace. Her skin glowing under the lights, I must admit, she is a stunning woman, somebody who I don’t think I could ever compete with.
As we near she stands. “Matt! Lovely to see you.” She kisses his cheek and looks straight at me, I’m not the violent type, but I want to punch her.
“Melissa.” Is all Matt says to acknowledge her before pulling a chair out for me to sit and setting himself down beside me.
“We need to talk, Matt.” Melissa says. “In private.”
“Well, I’m a little busy at the moment.” Matt doesn’t make eye contact with her as he speaks.
Dinner is announced and Melissa stands to leave.
“Where are you going?” Grace asks confused.
“I’m going to my table for dinner.”
“Don’t be so silly, eat with us!” Grace smiles. Obviously she is unaware of the tension between us. Matt is avoiding Melissa, when she tries to speak to him he pretends he can’t hear or gives her a one worded answer but the majority of the time he has been speaking to other people around our table. I groan as she sits back in place giving me a sly smile.
It seems that there isn’t just an atmosphere between the two of us. There is also an icy feeling between James and Matt. They’ve barely spoken. Obviously he hasn’t come to terms with us. If there is even an us.
During dinner a man stepped on to the stage and thanked everybody for coming and thanked Jackson Industries for donating five hundred thousand dollars; everybody then applauded.
Once we finish up our dessert – a chocolate truffle torte which was delicious Matt looks at me.
“Are you ready to go?” He whispers and I nod. He turns to face the table. “I’m leaving; I have an early morning tomorrow so I don’t want to stay late.” He announces and everybody says goodbye.
“That’s fine; we will drop Casey off at the hotel.” Grace smiles at me.
“Oh thanks Grace, but I really have to go make a phone call.” I lie and James’s eyes are on the two of us.
“That’s fine, honey.” Grace and I stand, we hug goodbye as Matt stands to speak to James. Melissa doesn’t take her eyes off him. I clear my throat in attempt to divert her attention but it is unsuccessful.
Matt turns to face me once he has finished up, aware that the people around us are still watching.
“I’ll get my driver to drop you off on the way back.” He lies.
“Okay. Thanks.” I smile.
“Matt, can we talk?” Melissa pleads, her eyes scanning Matt’s face.
All eyes are on the two of them, I watch Matt, wanting-willing him to say no and tell her to go away. Leave him alone. Leave us alone.
He lets out a breath of air and nods. He walks off to the exit and she follows.
For the second time tonight, I question what am I actually doing here? How could I try and be with a man like him. My heart thumping in my chest, I watch the exit where they both left, together and wait for them to return. I lift a glass of wine from the table, Grace’s I think and I drink it in one before heading outside.
I stand from a distance watching the display. I can see them perfectly and I stay back out of sight so they can’t see me. Matt’s back is to me and Melissa is standing close, too close for my liking. He’s speaking to her and although I can’t hear exactly what is being said I can tell that he isn’t happy by his posture. His shoulders widen whilst shaking his head as she looks up at him, pleading.
Melissa’s eyes look up and lock on mine for a few moments before returning to Matt’s face. Her lips curl into a small smile and she puts her hand on his cheek and kisses him.
And he kisses her back.
Passionately.
~~~~~
All the blood rushes to my head and tears start to burn as they spill and I run through the grounds until I find some steps and I sit. I take a few moments to catch my breath. I put my head in my hands as I cry. What the hell am I doing here? What is this woman I have become?
I hear him clear his throat behind me and I make no effort to acknowledge him.
“Casey…”
I glance back at him. “Just fucking go away. Leave me alone and go back to Melissa. You both belong together!” I screech at him.
“I don’t want her. I have never wanted her.”
I stand and turn to face him. “You liar!” I scream as more tears spill down my face. “I’ve made a huge mistake coming here.”
His apologetic eyes search mine, his shoulders are hunched. I shake my head at him. “You disgust me.”
“Casey, just listen to me!” He demands as he grabs my upper arm. I look down at his hand and back up at him.
“There is nothing to explain. I saw you kiss her. You are a perfect couple.” I shrug my shoulders.
“She kissed me – I didn’t kiss her.” He explains, his grip on me tightening. “I don’t want her.” He growls.
“Liar!” I shout.
“I. Don’t. Want. Her.” He says through gritted teeth.
“You know the stupid thing about it? I flew over here because I missed you. Because I thought there could actually be something between us, that you were a decent person. One thing I never said I would do again is put my heart on my sleeve. And I did. I went against my own morals for you, Matt. And you chewed me up before spitting me out.” I shake my head in defeat. “What about Kathryn, I bet you fucked her too?”
When he doesn’t reply I know the answer. “I knew it, you are a fucking whore!” I scream looking at him through blurred eyes. “How would you feel if it was me kissing somebody else, maybe I should go back and find Daniel.”
“No!” He says. His expression pained. “I’m sorry, Casey. She means nothing to me. A quick fuck every now and then. You’re the one I really want.”
I shake my head “No, no, no I don’t want to hear it. It’s gone. Whatever we are-were, it’s gone.”
“You don’t mean that.” He says, his jaw clenched.
“Oh I do. I’m catching the first flight back to the UK. I’m done.” I yank my arm from his grip and push past him. I don’t know where I am going, but I’m walking as far as I can from him.
“Casey!” I hear him call me, and I ignore him.
He grabs me and spins me round to face him. I look into his eyes and before I can help myself my mouth crashes against his. The taste I crave. The release I need from all the emotions I am currently feeling – anger, betrayal and jealousy.
Our kiss is rough, taking all we can from each other. Our frustration showing.
“It’s you I want Casey. Only. You.” He growls against my lip before biting gently on it. Which causes me to gently moan. All the hurt is now forgotten and all that matters is that I’m here, with him.
I wrap my arms around his neck to continue our kiss, our tongues dancing together, I show him I’m open for him, that I’m holding my heart out to him for him to take, not break. He soon manipulates our kiss. His hand reaching round and squeezing my ass.
“Only. You.” He growls again. “Say it Casey.”
“Only me.” I say back between the kisses I lace from his lips to his jaw line.
~~~~~
We are both consumed in our own thoughts in the ride back to his place, we don’t speak. But the connection with our hands is enough for me, our fingers entwined. I try to figure out what the hell happened tonight. How my anger at him has now turned into hunger and lust. The fire in my belly, it’s all for him.
He begins to run his thumb across the top of my hand and I turn to smile at him, which he returns.
The doubts I had earlier have all disappeared. I knew he had a reputation and a past, everybody does. I think of Melissa and Kathryn. How Melissa smiled at me before kissing Matt, trapping him, setting us both up to fall down. Fall apart.
However, my conversation with Kate came flooding back to me. Certain statements she said stand out:
He’s a good man and he’s into you
I’ve never seen him act this way before
You’re exactly what he needs.
And I know he is exactly what I need.
Chapter Twenty-seven
Casey
I swallow as I let Matt lead me toward the bed. I can’t help but feel excited and a little bit desperate. I know what is about to happen, what he will do to me and how my body will react to his touch. The warmth of his hand around mine seems to radiate into my core. He slowly turns me around and begins to inch the zipper of my dress down, trailing kisses where my skin is exposed.
“You look so damn sexy. I’ve been thinking about this all day, babe,” He says softly.
I involuntarily stiffen. Babe. Baby. Those are the words Darren used to call me and the words Matt has said to many, many women. I know he says he cares for me, but if he does, how can he use that word when he talks to me? I shouldn’t be so bothered, but that nagging thought, which entered my mind some time ago, just won’t leave. It has taken up residency in my brain and grows a little each time he uses those words.
Sensing my distraction, he stops and turns me to face him. I look down at my stilettos and pretend to be distracted by them. It doesn’t work. Matt knows me. Oh, how this man knows me. Tipping my chin up with his index knuckle, he searches my eyes.
“Casey, what’s wrong?”
“Nothing,” I lie with a smile as I circle my arms around his neck.
“Casey, I know when something is wrong. Talk to me.”
After chewing on the inside of my bottom lip a moment, I just say it, “I don’t like when you call be Babe or Baby. Simple as that.”
“I see. I will try not to call you that. Why does it bother you?” He asked with concern.
What do I say? Do I keep with the whole truth? A little lie? I ponder a moment for deciding what to do.
“Darren called me Baby and Babe. Even the day I found him cheating, he had called me those supposed endearments. And then, they seem to roll off your tongue so easily. You say I’m different from the other women, but I know you must have used those same names for them. I…I just can’t stand it. Maybe it shouldn’t matter….but, it just does,” I softly say.
“What if I call you something else?” He asks with a mischievous grin, trying to lighten our conversation.
“I guess it depends what you have in mind,” I say with a slight smile. I would probably answer to anything he called me.
“Close your eyes.”
When my eyes are closed, I stand there a moment before I sense his closeness. He slowly walks me backward until my back is against the wall. He leans close and I take in his scent.
“I’m going to call you sweetheart. Sometimes I already do.” He whispers as he places kisses on my neck and collar bone. I involuntarily shiver from the warmth of his breath.
“You are so sweet, Casey. You seem like a bad-ass corporate woman, but down deep, you are so sweet. Your hair smells sweet, like vanilla. Your skin, damn, your skin tastes so sweet,” He says while slowly tasting the skin on my collarbone, down my chest to the swell of my breast that is peeking out of the neckline of my dress.
Matt runs his hands down my arms and intertwines his fingers with mine. He brings this up to his mouth and kisses them tenderly. He then places my right hand on his chest. My eyes flash open when I feel the warmth of his skin. While my eyes were closed he had unbuttoned his dress shirt and it hung open showing his taut muscles.
“Feel me, Casey.” He directs me, “Not just my skin and flesh. Feel deeper. Do you feel my heart beating? It beats only for you. Before you, my heart was a muscle that functioned to keep my body going. Because of you, it’s alive, it….feels. Casey, you’ve made my heart feel love. You are my sweetheart.”
I melt at his confession.
Chapter Twenty-eight
Hannah
The next day in the office, I break down.
I can't take any more.
I can't take any more hate mail or heavy breathing phone calls.
I can't take any more of the loud banging in the middle of the night.
I can't take any more sleepless nights.
I'm lonely.
And scared.
I don't know what possessed me when I thought I could go over a stalker. For some reason I felt invincible.
And I'm not.
I thought about getting security to escort me home and to stay with me over night but I can't authorize it.
Stephen said I should just phone Casey and ask if she would arrange something, but I didn't want to hassle her.
But as things are progressively getting worse I have no choice.
I pick up my office phone and dial Casey's number.
"Hi Han!" she sounds happy.
"Hi Case. I need to speak to you. Have you got time?"
"Are you alright? You sound upset." She sounds concerned.
I can't help myself; I start to cry at her words.
"Hannah, what’s wrong? Talk to me."
"When are you coming home?" I ask between sobs.
"I don't know, I'll speak to Matt once he is back from the gym. I'll get something sorted and get back right away. Please can you tell me what's wrong?"
An email pops up on my screen; it's from the mysterious sender.
I open it and there is a picture of me, this morning on my way to work.
"I-I-I've got to go." I hang up the phone instantly.
~~~~~
Casey
Matt arrives home from the gym, his hair damp with sweat, his face red from working out, and he looks sexier than ever.
"Matt, we need to talk." I say to him after we say 'hello' in our own special way.
"Of course, Case. What's up?" He pulls his sweat stained shirt off over his head revealing those amazing muscles and abdomen of his.
My eyes roam his body hungrily. I could just run my tongue over his chest.
He clears his throat to pull me back to him from my little daydream. He cocks his head watching me and his lips curl up in to a small smile.
His phone rings and he looks at the caller ID. "About fucking time!"
"Hello Harry. I hope you have good news for me....I knew it!...Yes...Yes...Have you been in contact with her? And?...Thank you.. You have been awesome. Thanks again." He puts his phone in his pocket and turns to face me again.
That grin that I have grown to love spread across his face.
"The baby isn't mine!"
"Brilliant!" My grin is as big as his.
"I need to celebrate." He swoops me into his arms and makes his way towards the staircase.
"Matt, I really need to talk to you. I promise I’ll be quick."
He turns and walks to the sofa where we sit. He sits beside me watching me intently, his face serious.
"Something is wrong with Hannah and I’m worried. She called me earlier and asked when I was going home. She started crying and when I asked what was up she didn't tell me. That's not like Hannah. She's normally the strong one."
Matt studies my face for a couple of seconds. "So what are you saying, Casey?"
"I need to go home. Soon" I sigh and reach my hand to his jaw line where stubble is now starting to grow back.
As much as I don't want to leave, don't want to be away from him again. I know I need to get back for my best friend, to get back to my business and reality.
He nods his head in agreement. No emotion showing in his eyes.
"I'm thinking of flying back this weekend." I explain.
His facial fea
tures tighten, his eyes never leaving mine. "That's tomorrow." He realizes and I nod.
He stands and runs his hair through his sweat soaked hair, "But I've only just got you back." His usually strong voice breaks as he speaks and I can feel tiny strings pulling at my heart.
I stand beside him and place a hand on his solid bicep and look directly at him.
"You aren't losing me Matt. You can come visit whenever you like and I can come back once everything is sorted over there." I point out my voice soft.
"You think a relationship can last when we only see each other a week or so and then spend a couple months apart?" His words hit me like a ton of bricks. I understand what he is saying, I know it will be hard but I know if we really wanted to we could make it work
I know I really want it to work, I know he is all I want. He is perfect.
The past few days, spending every second I can with him. Making love to him. Him calling me his girlfriend. Telling James about our relationship. Holding hands to the office. His DNA results. Our afternoon at the beach.
I wouldn't change any of it for the world.
It has all made me realize my feelings for him are a lot more than just lust and desire.
And more love and need.
I want him to be my happily ever after.
That night, Matt pulls me into his arms but makes no effort to have sex with me and I can't help but wonder if this is his way of saying goodbye. Taking me in his arms but becoming detached sexually.
It's not a reality I am ready to face so I sleep. I will myself to sleep for a very long time to avoid the painful goodbye that awaits me tomorrow.
Chapter Twenty-nine
Casey
Matt drops me off at the airport the next afternoon.
He is wearing a pair of dark jeans and a navy t-shirt. His hair styled and sunglasses on. How could he look so beautiful when we are just about to say goodbye?
I don't think that he currently feels the same way as me, since I am going to be spending the next 11 hours or so on a plane I didn't make much of an effort this morning. I threw the peach maxi dress I wore the first day I saw him over here. The same dress we had sex in against the wall in his office and left my hair down natural. I haven't put much makeup on. I figured I would try to sleep as much as I could on the lonely plane ride back to the UK. If I sleep, I won't be able to think about and miss Matt or worry about Hannah. It's the safest option.
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