Let's Give It Up for Gimme Lao!

by Sebastian Sim

  When Mary Lao returned to the pew, her husband leaned in and whispered, “Didn’t you explain to the pastor that Barber Bay is not gay? He has a woman in Batam.”

  “It doesn’t matter.” Mary Lao was adamant. “Barber Bay has fallen out with the church. We must not associate with him anymore.”

  Mary Lao meant what she said. When Barber Bay turned up at the door two days later, Mary Lao would not let him in. Her family was attending Pastor Kong’s church, and Barber Bay was no longer welcome in her house. More importantly, she did not want Barber Bay to approach her husband for any more loans. His illness was God’s punishment. It was not right for herself or her husband to alleviate it.

  Mary Lao’s husband could not see Barber Bay from where he was seated in the living room. He could only imagine the old man ashen and shaken. For the longest time Barber Bay must have felt safe and loved in the house of the Lord. God’s love was all encompassing. But now that the church had cast him out, God’s vindictiveness was all encompassing too. Neighbours turned their backs on him, friends barred him from entering their houses, medical expenses drained his savings, pain racked his body and fear racked his mind. God must be really angry with him.

  Mary Lao’s husband secretly thought his wife was being cruel. There were many things Mary Lao did that he did not approve of. He cringed at the insufferable persistence with which she hounded their friends and acquaintances for sales appointments. He detested her habit of snapping her fingers to summon the waiters or snapping at their domestic help when the bathroom tiles were not properly scrubbed. He felt slighted when she made big-ticket item purchases without consulting him. This latest move of hers to herd the family to church for no apparent reason irked him immeasurably. Yet, as always, he kept these gripes to himself. He considered himself a patient, understanding and tolerant man. Were he not, this marriage would not have lasted so long or so peacefully. As he heard his wife shut the door in their old neighbour’s face, he heaved a heavy-hearted sigh. He truly had no choice but to be the bigger man to balance out his wife’s many failings.

  Wei Wen could not stand Sunday church. She had always been an atheist, and she found the congregation as stifling as the sermons. All the warm smiles and ubiquitous blessings from complete strangers unnerved her. How did these people imagine that instant trust and goodwill could materialise out of thin air? It baffled her that they were so ready to show concern when they hardly knew her. Did they know she used to watch and film sex tapes? Did they know she was excellent at fellatio? Did they imagine that among the congregation of a thousand, there would be no pedophile, batterer or voyeur?

  And then it struck Wei Wen. Perhaps that was what brought about the downfall of Barber Bay. The man was an accepted member of the congregation for as long as they imagined him to behave according to their prescribed code of conduct. That code of conduct would never land him in jail, or mire him in gambling debts or churn up a HIV positive medical status. Their offering of warm smiles and goodwill were a form of demand for that code of conduct. Barber Bay had failed them. As Elizabeth so tersely put it, Barber Bay had betrayed their trust for the last 20 years. The congregation was the victim.

  After three consecutive Sunday services, Wei Wen had had enough. She told Mary Lao that her grandmother once again switched her mahjong sessions to Sundays, so she had to be home to keep an eye on her brother. Although he was all of 23, he still could not be trusted to be alone at home. He knew how to turn on the gas to fry an omelette, but would likely forget to turn it off. There were instances when he was so distracted by the programme on television he allowed the soup to boil itself dry. That boy would always require supervision.

  Wei Wen’s conspicuous absence in church attracted queries from the welcome team, of which Elizabeth was an active member. Mary Lao explained that Wei Wen was burdened with caregiver duties for her brother with Down’s syndrome. That disclosure quickly rippled across the pews. Well-wishers boldly stepped forward to introduce themselves, expressed their concerns and sympathies and promised to keep Wei Wen and her brother in their prayers. Elizabeth dutifully whispered into Pastor Kong’s ear, who saw it fit to include Wei Wen and her brother in his blessings towards the end of his sermon. Many among the congregation, who could recognise Mary Lao from her testimony on stage several weeks ago, stopped by her pew on their way out and personally delivered their blessings.

  Mary Lao and her husband were overwhelmed.

  On the drive home, Mary Lao’s husband confessed that he was moved. There was so much outpouring of love from the congregation. If he had his doubts when she first dragged him to church, the doubt had all but dissipated. He could actually feel the energy of positivity and hope flooding the church and flowing through him today. God’s love was real.

  Mary Lao remained silent throughout the drive, but her body was shaking with excitement. She had an epiphany earlier at church. It was a seedling of a raw idea, but it had huge potential. She had no urge to share it with her husband though. She had left him behind way back when he failed to share her jubilance at closing her first insurance sales. He could never comprehend how grand her ambitions were.

  Mary Lao bided her time. She spent several weeks doing her market research, getting quotations, sourcing for bank loans and approaching potential investors among her more affluent insurance clients. When her initial idea finally took shape, she summoned Wei Wen for a discussion. Now that Skye was starting school, what were her plans?

  “I might start looking for a job,” Wei Wen stumbled. She had not expected the question and secretly prayed that Mary Lao was not thinking of recruiting her into insurance sales.

  “You were pursuing a business degree before you had Skye. I just thought it would be a waste not to apply it,” Mary Lao prompted. “I have a business venture in mind. How would you like to help me develop it?”

  Wei Wen’s heart skipped a beat, but she managed to retain her outward calm. “What kind of business venture are we looking at, Mum?”

  “I spoke to some of my insurance clients with business backgrounds. They are willing to support me if I take up a Taiwanese pearl milk tea franchise. Are you familiar with it?”

  Wei Wen could feel her pulse quicken. She had a gathering with her friends from university recently, and everyone was talking about the bubble tea craze. It was a new beverage developed in Taichung, Taiwan barely three years ago. Sweetened, chewy pearl balls made of tapioca were added to ice-blended milk tea and served in trendy cups sealed with plastic cellophane. The permutation of fruit flavours and tea bases allowed the product to spin into a colourful spectrum on the menu. No self-respecting teenager could bear to be spotted without one in hand.

  “If I remember correctly, the bubble tea craze came to Singapore about one year ago. There was a sudden proliferation of bubble tea outlets along the Orchard Road shopping belt,” Wei Wen reflected. “I guess it is not too late to enter the market. But I must say the rental rates at the prime shopping malls are prohibitive. We really ought to do our market research first.”

  “I did just that,” Mary Lao said. “Which is why I am staying away from shopping malls and tapping into the neighbourhood market. I plan to set up five outlets within the first two years. All the outlets will be strategically positioned near train stations where commuters pass by on their way to school or work.”

  “That is a novel idea,” Wei Wen admitted.

  “Yes, but that is not the catch,” Mary Lao elaborated. “I have registered the firm as ‘Ai-Xin Zhenzhu Nai Cha’, or ‘Pearls of Love’. In every outlet, our service crew will include a supervisor guiding a special needs youth, such as your brother. That will be our mission. Providing employment for the less fortunate in our society. I was hoping you could get your brother to pioneer our first outlet, which I intend to set up near our church. Many among the congregation live in the immediate vicinity, so we can easily build up our support base in double quick time. What do you think?”

  For a moment, Wei Wen found herself at a lo
ss for words. Her mother-in-law had obviously thought the plan through. Although she was not convinced that altruism was the main motivation when her mother-in-law roped in her brother, it quickly crossed her mind that this arrangement could turn out to be a win-win situation. She could keep an eye on her brother while he was gainfully employed. If she needed time off to take care of Skye, surely her mother-in-law would understand. It was in fact the perfect arrangement.

  The following months saw Mary Lao and Wei Wen working closely together. For once, the two women found themselves bonding effortlessly without Skye in the picture. Mary Lao’s drive and ambition provided Wei Wen the impetus to apply herself. Conversely, Wei Wen’s vigour and efficiency impressed Mary Lao. Over time, Mary Lao began to see Wei Wen less as an underperforming daughter-in-law and more as a promising young associate whom she enjoyed mentoring. Wei Wen, too, was aware of the altered dynamics in their interactions and keenly appreciated the trust and respect her mother-in-law now accorded her.

  Initially, the men in the house were amused. Skye was often left in their charge while the women left the house for site recces and business appointments. Even when the women were back home, the men were expected to keep Skye occupied and entertained while the women discussed business development. It wasn’t long before the two men realised they were being neglected. Mary Lao’s husband first noticed that his wife stopped reminding him to take his daily medication. When he gently reminded her not to forget to remind him about his medication, his wife snapped. Gimme Lao too, realised that his wife now had a tendency to slip into an exhausted sleep once she hit the pillow. For years, she had always been the one to reach over and initiate sex. He never had to and did not quite know how to wake her up for it. After going three weeks without any form of intimacy, Gimme Lao was so frustrated he picked a quarrel with Wei Wen when Skye was caught trying to light the stove to conduct a personal science experiment unsupervised. Wei Wen felt guilty and said she was sorry she left Skye alone in the kitchen. When Gimme Lao continued to sulk, Wei Wen quickly realised the root cause of his peevishness. After they got into bed that night, Wei Wen reached over and tentatively scratched the nape of his neck. Gimme Lao’s quick and ready response confirmed her suspicions. She had been neglecting him and he knew no other way of expressing his frustration. Her husband was simply throwing a conjugal tantrum.

  The day finally arrived when the first Pearls of Love outlet was ready for operation. Mary Lao had earlier called up Pastor Kong and requested to give testimony. As she stepped up to the podium and grabbed the mike, she pinched her face and prayed aloud, “Lord, I ask for your forgiveness, for I am guilty of hypocrisy. When I first came to this church, Pastor Kong told the congregation that it was compassion and empathy that brought me to church. I myself believed that too. But the Lord’s grace and teaching over the many months have opened my eyes. I am not a woman of compassion. If anything, I blatantly lack compassion.”

  Many in the congregation sat up straight. Though most of them would not admit it, they loved nothing more than a public confession of sin harboured, witnessed or committed.

  “Some of you know my daughter-in-law Wei Wen. Some of you may even know she has a brother born with Down’s syndrome. When she married my son, I took her into my family. But I did not take in her brother. At the back of my mind, I kept telling myself that the caregiver duty for her brother lies with her and her own family. I love Wei Wen for being a dutiful wife to my son and a loving mother to my grandchild, but I did not love her enough to share her burden. I felt that I had to draw a line.

  “But over the last few months, God has opened my eyes. There is no line to be drawn when it comes to love and compassion. God does not draw a line, so why should I? If I love my daughter-in-law, should not what worries her, worry me too? Should not what concerns her, concern me too? I struggled with that thought. I struggled with the horrible realisation that I am a woman lacking in compassion, a hypocrite sitting in the Lord’s house of love and truth.”

  The congregation held their breath as Mary Lao cupped her mouth with a trembling palm. Some of the women dug in their purse for a handkerchief in anticipation of the emotional outpouring about to come. Some of the men could feel the lump in their throats.

  It took a little while but Mary Lao eventually regained her composure.

  “It finally dawned on me I have work to do. God’s work. When a child is born with Down’s syndrome, it is God testing us. Do we merely feel compassionate or do we exercise compassion? Do we merely keep the child in our prayers or do we reach out to help? I for one know where I stand now. I am determined to do God’s work.

  “After church service today, as you make your way past Block 75 to Queenstown MRT station, you will see a newly opened bubble tea outlet. The signboard reads ‘Ai-Xin Zhenzhu Nai Cha’, or ‘Pearls of Love’. If you look inside, you will see Wei Wen’s brother learning to run the outlet under the guidance of a supervisor. That is me doing God’s work. I am committed to giving Wei Wen’s brother a fighting chance at an independent life, to feel proud of himself because he can earn his own living. And I urge all of you to drop by, to give him, not sympathy, but encouragement and support. Do not be the woman I once was, who speaks compassion but does not act on it. Be the greater person God intended you to be. Amen!”

  A thunderous applause greeted Mary Lao’s testimony. Pastor Kong made a mental note to recruit her for the next batch of church elderly; he could do with someone who could move the crowd in the manner Mary Lao just demonstrated. Elizabeth swelled with pride as she watched Mary Lao make her way back to her pew bathed in admiration and glory. Here was a woman who did not speak a word of English when they first met, whom she herself tutored and trained two decades ago. Today, Mary Lao brought down the house with a powerful testimony on the pulpit. Elizabeth couldn’t have been prouder had one of her students come in first in an international piano recital competition.

  Church service ended at noon. By two in the afternoon, three of the 13 flavours offered by the Pearls of Love outlet had run out. At the peak of the rush, Wei Wen’s brother panicked and almost sliced off his finger rinsing out the blender. That very night, he woke up from a nightmare screaming and crying about menacing blenders and severed fingers. Wei Wen had to come over in the morning and convince him to report for work.

  Fortunately for Wei Wen’s brother, the customers from church who kept returning soon become familiar, friendly faces. Some of them made the effort to chat with him and praised him profusely when he made them their blended bubble tea correctly. An elderly gentleman even bought him a transistor radio so he could keep himself entertained during the lull periods. Wei Wen’s brother took to the music channel instantly. It was 1992 and Right Said Fred was topping the local radio charts. Whenever their song came on air, Wei Wen’s brother would squeal in delight and bob his head to the beat. Tickled, the supervisor goaded him to choreograph a dance routine. Wei Wen’s brother would uphold two fingers of each hand in a V sign and gyrate out of tempo as the song went “I’m too sexy for my shirt, too sexy for my shirt, so sexy it hurts”. The children and youths in the neighbourhood got a great kick out of it and would drop by just to watch him dance. Soon, everyone started referring to both Wei Wen’s brother and the outlet as Too Sexy. Students would arrange to meet at Too Sexy after class before heading downtown to the cinema or the bowling alley. Church members exchanged anecdotes about Too Sexy, some lamenting that he was picking up foul language from the hooligans, others updating how he was building up self-confidence and chatting with the regular customers. Too Sexy became an icon in the Queenstown neighbourhood.

  Encouraged by the instant success of the first outlet, Mary Lao and Wei Wen decided to launch the next two outlets concurrently. They visited the school for students with special needs that Wei Wen’s brother had once attended and asked for a list of candidates they could interview. It took them months of phone interviews and house visits before they managed to narrow the pool down to a handful. Mary Lao’s cri
teria, though not explicitly stated, was unequivocal. These had to be youths with Down’s syndrome whose parents were active members of churches. Mary Lao then instructed her property agent to focus on the immediate vicinity of these churches and find her a suitable shop space. Once the rental contracts were signed, Mary Lao asked the parents to introduce her to their church pastors. She shared with them her story of awakening and how she was now inspired to do God’s work. Although neither church granted her request to give testimony on the pulpit, they agreed to feature her story in their church newsletters. The pastors also promised to mention her new bubble tea outlets during their sermons to illustrate how God inspired ordinary men to do extraordinary things for the less fortunate in society.

  Unhappy that she was denied the chance to speak directly to the congregation, Mary Lao decided she had to raise the bar on her publicity. She made a few phone calls to her investors and almost immediately hit jackpot. One of them had a sister who was married to a top executive at the Singapore Broadcasting Corporation. Being the only influential media conglomerate in Singapore, the corporation held a virtual monopoly and dominated the broadcasting industry. Two strategic dinners later, it was agreed that the current affairs division would produce a short documentary on local social entrepreneurs with a heart. Mary Lao’s Pearls of Love start-up would be featured as one prominent example.