Finding Flynn

by Alexandria Bishop

  She lets out a sexy moan and tightly fists the front of my T-shirt before tugging the bottom hemline. I help her out and rip my shirt off over my head. She delicately runs her fingers along the ink that crosses my chest and down my arm, but I claim her mouth and she quickly forgets her previous perusal.

  That will have to be saved for another day. Our breathing quickens and her movements become erratic the faster she moves. Her thighs tighten their hold on me, and I know she’s getting close. Her hands go down to tug her own shirt off, and I realize I have to stop this before it escalates any further. I move her off of me and stand up to give us some distance.

  Shit. What was I thinking? Oh right, I was thinking with my dick.

  “Not right now and not today. Not like this,” I whisper into her ear.

  Her back stiffens and the corners of her mouth droop down. In a very sexy breathy voice she says, “I don’t understand. Why are you stopping this? You and I both know you’re just as into this as I am.”

  Fuck! I let out a heavy sigh and try to figure out the best way of saying this so she’ll understand and not take it as me rejecting her.

  “I want you. Fuck, I want you so bad, and I feel like a complete moron for stopping this.”

  “Then why are you?”

  “Not even five minutes ago you were feeling sorry for me and it would feel like I used my mom’s memory as a ploy to get you in bed. I don’t want that. I don’t want any drama involved for our first time.”

  She nods her head when she looks up at me and even though she understands, there’s still sadness in her eyes. There’s no easy way to go about this without her feeling a little bit rejected. I get it, she’s a girl, but it isn’t like that. I kneel down in front of her so I’m eye level with her. Grabbing her face, I look into her eyes.

  “You’re beautiful. You know that, right?” She just shrugs her shoulders, so I continue.

  “I really care about you, Ashtyn, and I don’t want you thinking otherwise. If I didn’t care, I wouldn’t have stopped anything. You mean a lot to me, and I want to make things right between us.”

  She lets out a deep sigh and leans her forehead against mine.

  “I understand.”

  “I need to go take a quick cold shower to calm down. Can you hang out for a minute? We can watch a movie or something when I’m done.”

  I lean forward to kiss her and start turning away when she grabs my hand to stop me. I turn back to her one eyebrow raised and wait for whatever she has to say.

  In a low sexy voice, she says, “I can help you with that. Just because we aren’t having sex doesn’t mean there aren’t other things we can do. Now lead the way to your bathroom. I assume there’s room in the shower for two?”

  I’m sure my face lights up like a little boy on Christmas. I grab her hand and practically run to the bathroom. Unable to contain myself, I push her up against the closed door and continue what we started on the couch. Kissing up her jaw, I hit the spot behind her ear that makes her release a sexy moan every time and, if it’s possible, I’m even harder than I was before. Painfully straining against my jeans, I break away from her only to be met with a small whimper.

  I let my forehead fall gently to rest on hers. “I’m not stopping but I need to get out of these pants because I have a very painful situation going on right now.”

  Her mouth forms an “O” and she looks down, causing her eyes to almost jump out of their sockets. If she wasn’t aware of her effect on me before, she is now. Her hands immediately go to my button and pop open my jeans. She works quickly and my jeans hit the floor.

  I let out a low groan at the release of pressure but also from the light graze of her hand. That light touch felt amazing. She starts to tug my boxer briefs down but I grab her hands and pin them above her head.

  Leaning forward and nibbling on her earlobe, I growl, “I’m in charge here.”

  She nods her head as I let her hands drop to turn the water on in the shower. When I turn back around, she’s already stripped every piece of clothing off and I’m met with a glorious picture. She brings her hands up to cover herself but I pull them away and study her perfect body. Her boobs are on the smaller side but they’re just the right size for my hands. I run them down her smooth skin and she shudders as she throws her head back and lets out a breathy moan.

  Fuck, that was hot.

  Unable to control myself any longer, I strip down and pull her into the shower with me. She lets out an excited squeal, and I push her up against the wall to continue devouring her mouth. Working my way down her body, my fingers find her sweet spot, causing her to yell out my name. Following my lead, she grabs me and we frenziedly work each other over.

  We were already very worked up so it doesn’t take very long. Her sexy moans become more erratic, and I can feel her legs start to tighten. Pumping myself into her hand, we quickly find our releases at the same time while shouting each other’s names. Her legs start to give out but I hold her up and turn the water off.

  Reaching for a towel, I whisper to her, “I’ve got you.”

  She doesn’t respond, but the blissful look in her eyes makes me want to pound my chest, knowing I’m the one that put it there. I want to be the one that does that to her every day for the rest of our lives. Wrapping her in a towel, I grab one for myself and haul her off to my bedroom.

  Afterward, while lying in my bed, Ashtyn continues her earlier investigation of my ink. I lay there and let her, unsure of how she’ll react since her body is ink free. Her eyes immediately zero in on the tattoo on my ribs and she whispers the words out loud. “Faith is knowing there’s an ocean when you can only see a stream.” She pauses and traces the words with her finger and looks up at me. “That’s beautiful. What made you get it?”

  I remember the day I got that tattoo. It was the day I graduated from high school, a particularly shitty day only because my dad didn’t even care to show up. I’d already planned on leaving town that day, but I was hoping he’d pull his head out of his ass and beg me to stay. But clearly, the day didn’t happen the way I wanted it to.

  I don’t even remember why but I drove to the beach one last time before skipping town. I was so pissed off but suddenly there I was. I sat at a picnic table as the sun fell and when I looked down at the table, I saw it. I read the words and couldn’t take my eyes off of them. I read the quote a hundred times while sitting there. At the time, it felt so profound and fitting for my situation that I didn’t even think. I went off to the nearest tattoo shop and had it put on me. It was my first tattoo but, while sitting in that chair, I knew it wouldn’t be my last.

  It hurt like a bitch but it was also therapeutic and helped me shed some of that pain and anger at the same time. I felt like it meant there was something better out there for me than the life I’d been leading. Now I know there’s always a reason for the shit that we go through. My problems might feel huge in the moment but they’ll always be inconsequential in the long run. Just little road blocks on my journey to that ocean.

  I tell her the story behind my tattoo, and she lean downs and lightly presses her lips against it. “I’m sorry your dad sucks but would it make me sound like a horrible person to say I’m glad he does? If he wasn’t such an ass we wouldn’t be here together.”

  Wrapping my arms around her, I pull her tightly against me. I can’t imagine what my life would be like if my mom hadn’t died or my dad hadn’t turned out to be such an asshole. I wouldn’t change any of it because if I did, I wouldn’t be here with Ashtyn. Leaning into me, she turns and starts running her fingers along my sleeve.

  “So why, Ashland? You could have gone anywhere in the world. Why did you choose here?”

  I chuckle. Her voice is littered with disdain. I know she isn’t the biggest fan of Oregon but I love it here. It’s always been an escape from Dad.

  “I actually grew up coming here every summer. I’ve known Jax and Hudson almost my entire life. My dad would ship me off with a nanny for the summer so I’d b
e out of his hair. I continued coming even after the nannies went away.”

  “Okay, so then what’s with the Asian-inspired sleeve tattoo? You don’t look Asian at all, but I’ve been wrong before.”

  “Nope, not Asian. I was obsessed with Mortal Kombat growing up. I thought Liu Kang was a badass and wanted to be just like him when I grew up.”

  She sits up and her mouth drops open before she lets out the best laugh I’ve ever heard. It’s so contagious, that soon I find myself laughing right along with her.

  “Seriously? That’s it?”

  “Yeah. Why?”

  “Well after that profound story you told me, I guess I assumed all of your tattoos would have special meaning like that. I never would have thought it would be something as simple as your favorite childhood video game.”

  “Hey. That game got me through a lot of rough times. I’m sure there are quite a few nannies out there that can’t ever look at the game the same way again. When I wasn’t playing by myself, I was nagging them to play with me.”

  “Well, that’s cute. It brings out the little kid in you.”

  “After what we just did, you sure you want to call me a kid? That’s pretty illegal and kind of gross, you cradle robber.”

  Her face turns bright red, like I knew it would, and she playfully slaps my chest. It’s always fun to tease her, especially when she says things she doesn’t quite mean. She’s way too cute when she’s embarrassed for me to want to stop, and she makes it way too easy for me to do.

  “Oh my gosh, Flynn! That’s not how I meant it and you know it.”

  Letting her off the hook, I pull her forward and give her a quick peck on the lips and whisper into her ear. “Yeah, I know but it’s way too fun to tease you. Besides, I like that rosy pink color you always turn when you’re embarrassed. Makes me wonder where else you turn that same shade of pink.”

  Knowing my effect on her, I don’t have to look to know she’s turning an even brighter shade of red. I hold her tighter, happy she’s here in my arms. I can’t believe I almost screwed things up and lost her for good.

  I know it’s too soon to tell her, but if being without her taught me anything, it’s that she’s the one for me. I’m a sap but I don’t even want to let her go. She’s stuck with me forever. Deep in thought, she nibbles on her bottom lip. I wait for whatever she’s going to say.

  “You weren’t really going to skip the meeting with the label were you?”

  I had hoped she wouldn’t bring that up. The guys told me about the run-in in the park. “Honestly, I didn’t think I deserved to go. It didn’t sit well with me knowing your mom got us the meeting, and we weren’t talking to each other.”

  “Flynn, that’s stupid. Why would you waste an amazing chance like that? Besides, my mom didn’t get you the meeting. She simply passed on the video and your information to that guy. He didn’t have to do anything with it but he liked what he saw.”

  I nod my head. I know she’s right but if we hadn’t fixed things, I would have canceled.

  “It doesn’t matter because we’re going. There’s no point sitting here talking about what-ifs.”

  “You’re right. Either way, I’m so happy for you and the guys. My smokin’ hot boyfriend is going to become a rock star. We should just get married now so the bitches won’t get confused.”

  She’s joking but I’d marry her tomorrow if she wanted to. One day I’ll marry her. I feel like such a sap but when you know, you know.

  “Oh, is that right?”

  “Well it’s either that or I could pee on you. But I guess that’s usually more of a guy thing. Or maybe a dog thing?”

  I can’t help but laugh because this is her jealous side coming out. She seriously has nothing to worry about. I love her and only have eyes for her.

  “I love that you want to stake your claim but you have nothing to worry about, babe.”

  Looking back up at me, she has a look on her face that face that tells me not everything is settled yet. Barely above a whisper, she asks me, “The guys don’t know your secret do they?”

  I stiffen because that wasn’t what I was expecting from her at all. I thought Ashtyn was pissed. The guys will really hate me if they ever find out the truth.

  “That my father is Carl Wilson? No, they don’t. I’m pretty sure they’d kick me out of the band if they ever found out though.”

  “I don’t believe that but it’s your secret. You should tell them.”

  I don’t have a response so I just sigh and contemplate the drama that would ensue if I actually told the truth. Jax would go ballistic and smoke an entire pack of cigarettes. After, he’d try to beat the shit out of me, and we’d end the fight over a bottle of Jameson and me leaving the band. I’d rather not have that scenario play out. Even if Ashtyn is right, what good would come of it?

  She snuggles in closer and whispers, “Do you care if I stay here tonight? I don’t want to leave your arms.”

  “Will your mom care?”

  “No. She knows I’m here, and I told her I might stay the night.”

  “Well, then I’m definitely not letting you go.”

  We lay there in each other’s arms and soon her breathing starts to even out. Knowing she’s asleep, I kiss her on the head and quietly whisper, “I love you, Ashtyn.” Shortly after, my own exhaustion takes over and I follow her into a deep sleep.

  Chapter 13

  Ashtyn

  The last week has been nothing short of amazing. Flynn and I are even closer than before, and I feel like nothing bad can happen to us. Chloe and I have been out with the guys every single night, and I know Mom has been lonely. She sent me a cryptic text asking us to stay in for the night because she has a surprise for me.

  She’s miserable and I’m running off to be with my boyfriend every night. What kind of a daughter am I? I should have known that she needs me right now.

  Chloe and I have been going back and forth about what we think the surprise is. The front-runners are a shopping spree, concert tickets, or maybe studio time for the guys. The last one would be cool but I’m not sure how that would be a surprise for me. Secretly, I’m hoping she’s changed her mind about the divorce and she and Dad are getting back together.

  A girl can dream, right?

  Since it’s going to be a night in, I thought a day in would be fun as well. Chloe and I haven’t gotten much girl time since Flynn and I got back together. This time I’m not being lame and mopey either. I surprised Chloe this morning with a trip to the salon and we’ve been here ever since. There’s nothing better than a mani/pedi day with your best friend.

  After picking our polish colors, I start grilling her on the whole Jax situation. She’s got nowhere to go and maybe I can finally get to the bottom of things.

  “Hey, Chlo?”

  “Yeah.”

  “Are you finally going to tell me what’s up with you and Jax?”

  She rolls her eyes and sighs dramatically. She puts the magazine she was reading down on her lap. I don’t see what the big deal is. She’s never been this secretive about a guy before.

  “There’s nothing up with us. Why are you trying to make it seem like there is?”

  Now I’m annoyed. I don’t know why she is acting this way. They’ve been hanging out since she got here, and she hasn’t given me a single detail about what’s going on. It’s weird and so very unlike her. I just don’t get it.

  “Okay, but you guys have been hanging out a lot.”

  Practically biting my head off, she spits out, “Yeah, and…? It doesn’t have to mean anything more than that. Just drop it, Ashtyn. You’re ruining a perfectly good day.”

  I decide to drop the subject for now. There’s obviously more to it than that, but I don’t feel like getting into it. If she wants to keep it all to herself, then that’s her problem. And she’s right, this is a perfectly good day and I don’t feel like ruining it with Chloe drama.

  I pick my Kindle back up and continue reading the latest Abbi Glines
novel. I’m not sure how it’s possible but each guy she creates is more swoonworthy than the last. She’s going to have to up her game, though, if she plans to compete with Flynn.

  ***

  After our awkward day at the salon, we part ways when we got back home. To say things are tense would be an understatement. Our fun girls’ day went out the window the minute I brought up Jax’s name and Chloe turned into a raging bitch. I tried to make the day better by immersing myself in my book while Chloe went off sulking somewhere.

  Ugh! We need to straighten this out.

  I walk into the living room and find Chloe sitting on the couch, binge-watching old episodes of One Tree Hill. I don’t think she’s paying attention. Her eyes are a little glazed over and she seems to be staring off in space.

  “Hey, Chlo—”

  I don’t even finish my sentence before Mom comes through the front door. She has a big smile on her face, and I forget what I was about to say.

  “Oh, good, you’re both here. I have somewhere I want to take you girls. Are you ready to go?”

  I look over at Chloe, and she just shrugs her shoulders. Okay then. I guess she’s still pissed off at me. Not much I can do about that now.

  Confused I ask, “Ready to go where?”

  She shakes her head. “It’s a surprise. Now come on.”

  Chloe gets up and we follow Mom out the door. She’s being very cryptic and this whole thing is weird. I’m getting anxious more than anything else, and I just want to know what’s going on.

  We get in the car and she takes off without a word. With, Chloe and I not speaking, the ride is strained, to say the least. Add on the curiosity about Mom’s surprise, and I’m eager to get out of this horribly confined space as soon as possible. I don’t think she can tell that anything’s wrong. Either that or she’s choosing to ignore it. It’s not like this is the first or the last fight Chloe and I will ever get in.

  Pulling off of the freeway, Mom continues driving into the heart of town. Or I think that’s where she’s headed. I’ve been stuck in my little bubble and haven’t ventured out all that much. She turns into a car dealership and I’m confused. Is she getting a new car?