"So, how old are you exactly?" I blurt out once we're settled.
Mattie takes a sip of her coffee, but doesn't answer. When I met her she seemed young, maybe younger than me, with her neat blue dress and her demure ponytail. Now, she's sitting across from me dressed in a sheer grey top with capped sleeves, a deep purple suede pencil skirt, and six inch nude stilettos, her blue sweater and grey skirt stuffed in one of the bags and forgotten. She can easily pass for twenty-five.
Mattie takes her time relishing her coffee and studying passerby. Finally, she turns and looks at me, unblinking. I feel my pendant spark against my skin. It's an odd sensation, not exactly hot or cold. It feels different than anything I've ever felt before but still significant.
Mattie's lips turn up at the corner as she glances at my necklace. I fight the urge to pull my hair over my shoulder and shield it. She gives me another thoughtful look and sighs. "Sixteen."
Without giving me a chance to respond she stands and goes to the counter to order another coffee. I sit in stunned silence. My initial impression of her had been right, but I'm still surprised. She speaks and holds herself in a way that is much older. Throughout the day I had even found myself comparing myself to her, trying to match, maybe even surpass, her evident maturity. The clerks at the stores seemed to defer to her, especially once she changed her clothes, even though I was the one with the plastic. I'm not exactly jealous but I am starting to admire her, no matter her age.
While I'm waiting for Mattie to come back, my cell phone rings. It's Anders. I'm tempted to hit ignore, but I know I can't. Something weird is going on, well, weirder than the normal weird, and I'm not about to let myself be left in the dark. I've spent too much time there already.
"Hey," I answer.
"Ms. O'Fion. I apologize for disturbing you, but you must return to Price Estate immediately," Anders says in a weird, formal tone.
"What the hell? Anders?" I say, laughing nervously.
"Albert has been notified and will be escorting you back to the estate as soon as possible."
The phone clicks. Magda. Of course. She must have been standing there when he made the call. Reluctantly, I gather up our bags and go to get Mattie where she's still waiting to be served at the counter.
"Hey, we have to go. The queen summons us."
Mattie's head jerks up, her eyes wide. It takes a second before she relaxes.
"What's wrong?" I ask concerned.
"Nothing," she answers sounding slightly edgy and breathless, "I must have spaced out. You startled me."
"Oh, sorry."
Mattie just shakes her head and takes her bags from me. We turn and head out the door. June has been unseasonably hot so far, but today there is a distinct chill in the air. I set my bags down and wrap my arms around myself while I scan the street for Albert. I can't see him anywhere. While we wait, clouds pass over the sun and the wind picks up. Electricity crackles in my fingertips. Things are getting a little too gothic novel for me.
"Mattie?" I call looking over my shoulder. I find Mattie standing still as a statue several feet behind me. Her face is placid and she appears to be looking at something in the distance. I walk up to her slowly, trying desperately to ignore the irrational feeling of terror that is quickly filling me.
"Mattie?" I say quietly as I reach out and gingerly lay my hand on her shoulder. Her head snaps toward me and she grabs my wrist, holding onto it with an inhuman grip. Mattie stares at me from behind two twin pools of milky white. It's as if she has suddenly been struck with cataracts in both of her eyes. I watch in horror as her mouth twists up in a cruel smile. When she speaks her voice is altered; it's deep and empty sounding.
"Evangeline," says the weird voice that doesn't belong to Mattie, "I've waited so long. Too long. Do you feel it? Do you feel the darkness coming? What will you choose? I know. I know everything."
Mattie blinks and the cataracts vanish. Her body relaxes and she releases her hold on my wrist. I exhale the breath I didn't realize I had been holding.
"What the hell was that?" I choke out.
Mattie presses her lips together and doesn't answer. Her face has gone pale and her normally cool is shattered. She looks like nothing but a scared little girl, a child.
"Mattie?" I say softly, "Talk to me. What's going on? Why did you say those things? What did you mean?"
Mattie just shakes her head, her bottom lip quivering slightly. I pat her shoulder awkwardly, unsure of what to do or say. Luckily, Albert pulls up and saves me the trouble. He ushers us into the backseat of the town car. Mattie stares blankly straight ahead and doesn't say anything. She looks completely dejected. We ride most of the way in silence until, finally, Mattie speaks.
"I can't control it," she says glancing at me shyly. I smile hoping she'll continue. Inside, I'm completely freaking out. Why does everything have to get so messed up so quickly? I have enough trouble with my own secrets; I don't know if I'm strong enough to take on the burden of someone else's.
"It's getting worse and I don't know what to do," Mattie chokes out. Tears are streaming down her face but she does nothing to wipe them away.
"What's getting worse?" I ask, my voice sounding as shaky and unsure as I feel.
Mattie doesn't say anything and I'm afraid she won't speak at all. I bite the inside of my cheek in an effort to contain my frustration. It's taking all my self-restraint not to grab her by the shoulders and shake her until she explains that super-creepy episode back there.
"I don't know who they are, but they..." She stops and takes a deep breath. "They come inside of me, whenever they want. They have things to say. So, they use me."
I know I look completely freaked out, but I can't help it. What the fuck is she talking about? "Mattie, you have to do better than that. I can't even begin to comprehend what you're saying."
I'm on information overload. Too many things have happened in the last couple of days. Each new revelation brings a new mystery instead of clarity. I'm terrified to know what's happening to Mattie, but I still want to. In fact, I need to; I know that much.
"I'm sorry Evan, but I can't explain it," she says shaking her head violently. "They're everywhere, and they won't shut up. They used to only talk to me, but now they talk through me. They're desperate."
"For what, Mattie?" Chills break out over my skin and I already know the answer before she says it.
"You," she whispers confirming my fears.
She turns away and refuses to speak for the rest of the ride. When we get back to the estate, I see that a stretch limo is parked out front; Magda's usual ride. As soon as we stop, Mattie bolts from the car and runs inside. I'm more reluctant to leave the safe confines of the town car's back seat. Albert holds the door open and gives me a reassuring smile. He never says much, but he always seems to know more that he lets on.
"Thanks, Albert," I say as I take his hand and he helps me out of the car.
"Of course, missus."
I have to giggle at his cockney accent every time I hear it. "How many times have I told you? Call me Evan."
Albert just smiles, gets back in the car, and drives off toward the garages. I look up at the front doors of the house, contemplate going inside, and then quickly change my mind. Instead, I head around the house and into the garden. I want to go to the guesthouse and find Lex, but what I need right now is to be alone. I slip off my heel and relish in the feeling of being barefoot on the damp ground. Once my skin makes contact with the earth I feel calmer, more centered. It's a different kind of power than what I've been toying with, one based in control.
I take one deep breath and start to run. I run down the path out of the garden and into the orchards, where the trees are heavy with the sweet scent of the blossoms of late blooming apple trees. A slight breeze kicks up and soft streams of sunlight poke through the dense, gray clouds. I break into a smile and run faster.
When I reach the tree line of the forest I stop and close my eyes. For the first time, I listen. The trees are silen
t at first, but it only takes a few seconds for the whispering to start. I've always been aware of it, but I ignored it out of fear. The forest is speaking to me, beckoning me to enter. Without any hesitation, I step into the thick of the trees.
The moment I enter the forest I feel cut off from the rest of the world. It's a good feeling. I let my instincts take over and start to walk without thinking. The deeper I get into the woods, the louder the whispering gets until it's a steady thrum, like a heartbeat.
And then it's silent. I'm standing in a clearing where dusty light filters through a tangled canopy. I close my eyes and inhale deeply. The scent of water hits me in an overwhelming burst that fills me with a sense of weightlessness. It doesn't even freak me out that I can smell water; I welcome the new development to my senses.
I follow the scent down a narrow path that takes me to the lake. It's the other side, where I don't usually go. I walk up to the edge of the water until my toes are immersed. Light shimmers on the surface in patches and the dense storm clouds dissolve into blue sky.
My eyes shift out of focus as I stare at a random spot in the water. I feel my body become unnaturally still and I can't move. My pendant starts to warm until it burns against my skin. A sense of desperate longing fills me and consumes me. No amount of longing for my parents, or Lex, or anyone compares to this feeling. I know that I have to go into the lake and that it will be the only way satiate the intense need that is hollowing me out.
I don't bother taking my dress off, there's no time. As I submerge myself in the lake, I notice how warm it is, like bathwater. My pendant begins to throb steadily letting me know that what I'm doing is right. I wade in until the water is up to my waist and then I take a deep breath and dive.
The water is so deep that I can't see the bottom, so I swim toward it blindly. My lungs begin to burn, but I resist the urge to head back to the surface. I don't have a choice, I have to go on. The deeper I get, the more complete the darkness becomes. It feels like swimming through outer space, empty of stars.
When I'm sure I've reached my limit and that my lungs are going to burst, the darkness is shattered by a soft shimmering light. I push harder, aching to reach the light. As I get closer, I'm able to see a dark shape that appears to be the source of the light.
Finally, I reach it, "it" being some sort of rock or stone. I place my hand on its surface. The instant I make contact a white light bursts before my eyes and everything goes black.
Chapter Seventeen
The next thing I know, I'm in my bed and every part of me aches, right down to my scalp, and I'm sweltering hot. I push back the blankets that are covering me. So far, the afterlife is looking pretty much like my bedroom.
I'm so weak, that it's a struggle just to sit up. I notice that I'm wearing an unfamiliar blue long-sleeved thermal nightgown and a pair of wool socks. A bright fire is burning cheerfully in the hearth and rain splatters against the windows.
"Evan?" someone says to my left causing me to jerk upright and a spasm of sharp pain to ripple through my body. I wince and turn to see Lex sitting in a chair beside my bed. Maybe I'm not dead after all.
Lex swiftly crawls into bed next to me and pulls me into his arms. He holds on to me tight like I might evaporate any second. It's nice, but it hurts. I gently pry myself from his arms and sink back into the pillows.
"Lex, what's wrong?" I ask rubbing my eyes with the heels of my hands.
Lex sinks down beside me and gingerly slips his arm under my shoulders. He looks down into my face and gives me an incredulous smile. "What's wrong? Evan, you almost died."
I cringe. "Oh. That."
I roll on to my side and press my face into his neck. I want to make sense of what happened, but thinking too hard is making my head hurt. When I close my eyes all I can see is that shimmering light and the dark form it came from. Even after what happened I have the strongest desire to go back, to try again. If only I knew why and for what.
"I went for a swim and I must have gone too deep. The next thing I remember is waking up here," I lie. It makes me sick to do it, but something inside of me is blocking me, telling me it's not time yet. It's a slow steady whisper like the whispering of the trees only more human.
"Is that all?" he asks carefully.
"Yes." That one little word feels so vile on my tongue. Lex sighs and tightens his arms around me. I press myself closer to him despite the pain.
We stay like this for a long time, wrapped in each other's arms, matching heartbeat and breath. The rain continues, but the room lightens slightly as the morning takes hold. I succumb to the soft heat of Lex's heart and eventually I doze off.
For the second time in less than twenty-four hours, I open my eyes in a different place then where I closed them. The difference this time is that I can tell it's not real. I'm dreaming. The reason I know this is that I had this dream many times before, when I was a little girl. It's the same nightmare that almost drove me insane, the one I had completely driven out of my mind, until now.
I'm standing in a hallway facing two doors. One door is white, and one is black. My mistake is always choosing the white one. My childhood mind had the steadfast belief in white as good and dark as bad; too many white knight fairytales, probably. This time I'm prepared. I place my hand on the knob of the black door and give it a turn. It's locked.
"Of course," I say aloud to no one.
My options are limited. The hallway goes on for miles on either end. I tried getting out of it that way, before, and no matter what direction I went or how long and fast I ran I never made it to the end. The only way to get out of the nightmare is go through the white door. I study my fingernails and glance around pointlessly in an attempt to avoid looking at the shiny brass knob that is clearly goading me to turn it.
I bounce up and down on the balls of my feet to get myself psyched. "Come on O'Fion, you're a grown up now. You can do this."
I take a deep breath and try calling on the elements, but I feel nothing, not a twinge, not a spark. I'm completely alone.
"Fuck it." I turn the knob and brace myself. For nothing. When I open the door and step over the threshold I find myself in a brightly lit room with soft white walls and blonde wood floors. Red curtains, with flowers delicately stitched in blue thread, hang over floor to ceiling windows. On the opposite end of the room is another, larger door. I instantly recognize the room, not from dreams but from real life. I've seen this room in Magda's house.
In real life, when I stumbled on this room during my early days at the estate, the door on the other end was locked. I know in my gut that that wouldn't be the case if I tried now. I'm done being a scared little girl, paralyzed by a dream. I square my shoulders and march toward that door like a battle worn soldier pulling herself out of the trenches.
There is no knob or handle on the door. Instead, there is a groove carved where a knob would be. It's just deep enough to slip your fingers into. As expected, there is no resistance when I slide my hand in and pull.
The scene that meets me on the other side is baffling, to say the least. There's a large round wooden table surrounded by eight high backed chairs; seven of them are occupied. One Morris, one Rupert, one MacIntyre, one Thomas, one Rose, one James, and one Holloway. Different women than the ones on the council now, but familiar all the same. The only thing that's missing is...
"Magda, dear. Come in!"
A familiarly round woman, who speaks with exaggerated enthusiasm, jumps up from her chair. That must be Mary Morris' mother. I glance around but don't see Magda anywhere. The late Mrs. Morris comes up to me and I'm surprised to find her so much taller than I am. In fact, she's a giant compared to me. It dawns on me that I'm the size of a child, a little girl once again. Mrs. Morris places her hands on my shoulders and gazes down at me with moistened eyes.
"Sweetie, we are so sorry about what happened to your mother. But we're so, so happy to have you here with us." I take note of how eerily familiar that sentiment sounds.
The woman tak
es my hand and leads me around the table to the last empty chair. When I sit, my feet don't touch the ground. I look down to see that I'm wearing a pale blue silk dress and matching Mary Janes. The other women smile sweetly at me but I can sense an undercurrent of nervous energy. A few of them look excited, the rest of them not so much.
I expect to have to sit through another boring tea, and I wonder if that was what my childhood mind considered a nightmare. Not much has changed if that's the case.
Mrs. Morris leaves for a long time. When she comes back, she's carrying a large covered silver tray. She sets it down in front of me and gives me a warm smile.
"All right ladies, time to start!" she exclaims to the group.
Mrs. Morris takes her seat and the women link hands. The two on either side of me place their empty hands on the silver dome covering the tray. Panic starts to set in. The memory comes back to me in a rush and I know what will happen if they lift off that lid. The women close their eyes and begin to chant. I'm frozen in my seat, waiting in horror for what's coming. At the last second, before the horrible thing is supposed to happen, I glance up.
Another woman is standing by the door watching me. This one doesn't belong. She has long dark hair that falls to her waist in waves. Her eyes are a flat, inhuman black, but there's a distinct gentleness to her face.
"Evangeline. Do you feel it? Do you feel the darkness coming?" the woman says in a low dark voice, a voice I've only heard once before coming out of Mattie's mouth. "You have to wake up now. It's coming."
My eyes snap open and my vision is flooded with bright morning light. I sit up and glance around the room. Disappointment fills me when I realize that Lex is gone and I'm alone. At least, I thought I was alone. It takes a moment to register the figure asleep on one of the sofas.
"Aunt Lily?"
Lilian shoots up from the sofa with a dazed look on her face.
"Evan! My god!"
She rushes over to the bed and pulls me into a tight embrace. A rush of warmth washes over me and reminds me of everything I've been lacking in my life lately. I pull back and search her face; I want to see if anything has changed, if it's really been that long since I last saw her.
Evan Elemental (The Evan Elemental Series) Page 15