By Way of the Rose

by Cynthia M. Ward

  But now, I see that it's time for me to quash these dreams and become an ordinary, subservient woman in some loveless marriage. No excitement awaits me. I'll throw away my dreams, throw away my hopes, throw away my life to quilt, cook and wipe snotty noses for the rest of my days! Oh, the drudgery of it all! Why did I have to learn that the world was full of excitement and adventures when I would never get to experience any of it? This is my life??? Please say it isn't! John, give me hope... give me a chance to experience what you have. A life. Please come for me before it's too late!

  Your loving Sister

  Sarah

  John didn't exactly know how to respond to this letter. She sounded so desperate. Was she old enough to be married already? Did she say that she was eighteen now? All these thoughts held his attention. He could think of nothing else.

  “John, you don't seem to be yourself these days,” Mr. Tyson said. “Is there something bothering you, son?”

  “I guess I'm just missing home. I've been on the road so much. Running and fighting and hiding and dying. The time just passed before I knew it. You know my little sister, Sarah, is eighteen now? She was just a little girl when I left. I try to think of how she might look now, how any of them might look. How could this much time have passed me by? Where was I? Where was my brain? Why didn't I go home years ago?”

  “You know you had to stay away to protect them from your work. But you've done your fair share. The fact of the matter is you've done more than your fair share. Why don't you go home for a while? We do need you, but you need some time off. I've been stingy because you're one of my best men, you know? I'm sorry for keeping you here and keeping you so busy. Get up, pack your bags and go home for a nice long visit. Stay as long as you like. We'll be fine, but don't forget us, all right? Don't just stay away.”

  “You really mean it?” John perked up. “I'd give anything to see the folks again!”

  “Sure, John. The cause will most likely be here when you get back. And if it isn't, we'll thank God we won that battle.” He laughed his deep throaty laugh. “But don't worry, I'll find you something else to do.”

  It was spring of 1858 when John took off to Tennessee without even writing or sending a telegram to his folks. He was like a wild colt breaking loose. He would help Sarah find the life she wanted to live... no, his dear, sweet Sarah wasn't going to be miserable forever.

  John stepped from the stagecoach and back in time. He deeply inhaled the fresh mountain air. He looked around; nothing had changed in Eagleton and in this moment he returned to his boyhood. The years melted away as he walked down Main Street past Eastland Lumber Yard and onward toward Hamilton's Mercantile. The big red school was still perched at the end of the street. He remembered the ache in his heart to one day step beyond those giant white doors and sit in those cherry-wood desks with the other children. Surely, it would have been a magical and enchanted world, one reserved for only those lucky enough to be born to wealth and privilege. All the old feelings returned and overwhelmed him. Why should he feel this way? He'd gone out into the world and made it! He was a man of power and dignity. John took a deep breath and scolded himself. How dare that small clump of red bricks make him feel insignificant! He took his hat from his head and swiped his fingers through his dark curls. Suddenly he saw a vision of beauty and elegance stepping from the library. Her long dark hair floated over the soft breeze. A few silky strands glided across her lovely bronze face. She gently stroked them back in place as she noticed John staring at her. She stopped and stood still as she returned his gaze. A quiet stillness settled over them. She looked into his eyes and it was as if she was looking into his very soul. There was a haunting air about her. Something deep and brooding yet gracious and desirable. She quickly glanced down as her perfectly shaped lips gave way to a shy smile.

  John stood there, stunned. Soon a group of children came running from the library towards her. They were all talking and laughing at once.

  “Come now, children, time for lessons again.” She walked away toward the free school with the children streaming along with her.

  John turned and walked towards Mr. Hamilton, who'd been watching from his store platform. “She's a pretty little thing, ain't she?”

  “My Lord yes, she's beyond pretty! She's absolutely the most beautiful sight I've ever seen!”

  “Well, you can forget about her. The only things that have ever captured that one's attention are books, school, and her brother.” John had the strongest feeling that he knew who this vision was. But he didn't want to admit it because of the overwhelming attraction he'd felt toward her. Books and her brother? It can't be her... God, don't let it be her! I love her.

  “Who-who is she?” John stuttered. He hoped Mr. Hamilton would say any name in the world other than the one he felt was coming.

  “Why, that's Miss Sarah. She's the teacher at the Free School. The children adore her.”

  “That's little Sarah DuVal?” John felt like crying.

  “Yep. How do you know her if I may ask? Are you all right, son? You're looking a little green around the gills.”

  John took a deep breath. “I'll be fine, Mr. Hamilton. I suppose it's been so long no one is going to recognize me.”

  Mr. Hamilton looked closely into John's pale face. “Oh my word, is this our little book worm, John DuVal I see standing here?”

  “Yes, Sir. It's me.”

  “My stars above, when you left you were just a little boy, look at you now! A grown man with face hair and everything.” Mr. Hamilton chuckled as he hugged John and slapped him on the back. “Where in the world have you been keeping yourself? It's so good to see you again!”

  “And it's great to see you again my good ‘ol friend. I just can't get over little Sarah, I didn't even know it was her. In fact, I was hoping it wasn't her! I about lost my heart to that vision.”

  “I could see that by your moony eyed, love struck gaze. She has that effect on most young men. In fact, she has that effect on all the men, young or old,” Mr. Hamilton stated. “But I understand that must have been strange for you, huh? Being her brother and all.”

  “It sure was, I'm telling you. I never would have known her.”

  “She's going to be beside herself when she finds out it's you that's done come home! The whole family is going to be surprised! I know you ain't told them a word, or else we would have all known you were coming. Why all the secrecy?”

  “I was so excited to get away I didn't take the time to write, I just took off. Besides, I thought it would be a great surprise.”

  “It sure is wonderful to have you back. I know your folks have been missing you something fierce. Especially that little Miss Sarah.”

  “She isn't so little anymore, is she?” John replied. “I think I'm going to go listen in at the school. I want to see for myself how this young ‘Miss. DuVal’ teaches.” He chuckled.

  “Everyone says she's the best. Stop in and visit with me some, when you can.”

  “Oh, you know I will... and I'll be back in a little while to pick up a few things for the folks.” John gave him a quick handshake before heading towards the school. He walked over and leaned against the school building next to the open window to hear the lessons being taught as he'd done in his boyhood. He listened as Sarah gently corrected wrong answers and explained them. He heard the children calling her “Miss. DuVal.” John couldn't believe this was the little girl he'd left. He wondered how the time had slipped away from him so quickly. He wondered how she would receive him after these many years. Would they still be close or would he be a disappointment to her after all this time? He heard Sarah tell the class that they were dismissed and he walked around the building toward the door. He waited until all the children had gone before he went inside. Sarah was busy clearing the blackboard. He coughed.

  Sarah quickly turned to see him there, the stranger she'd seen on the street— the man she'd felt so drawn to. He was lean but muscular with dark eyes that called out to her as they had the firs
t time she'd seen him, but now they were distant and denying her complete entrance as if they were the doorway to some secret, forbidden realm. A dusting of a beard and mustache surrounded his boyish smile. Why was he here? Had he come to ask her out? For the first time Sarah felt maybe she could investigate this courtship thing that her mother was forever chiding her about.

  “Can I help you with something, sir?” She smiled politely as her cheeks flushed. She wondered how she might accept his offer, should he ask. She certainly hoped he would.

  “You truly don't recognize me, do you?”

  She shook her head. “Should I?”

  “Well, Jack Rabbit!” John said as he slapped his hand down on one of the desks. “Wouldn't you know it? The very first person I'd run into would be my very own little Princess, and she don't even know who I am!”

  “John?” She stared for a minute. “John!” she squealed. “It is you!” She ran to him laughing and crying at the same time. “You came! You came!” They hugged each other tightly as he swung her around the room. “I can't believe you're really here!”

  “Now, you really didn't think I'd stay away after reading a letter like that, did you?” He stood back and looked at her again. “My Princess! My little Princess has grown up, I can't believe it! Now what's this I hear about you being forced into wife slavery?”

  “Oh, John. I was so desperate when I wrote that letter. Please don't say anything to Momma about it.”

  “Don't worry, it's our secret. I know how it is here. But I'm going to fix everything for you”

  “Why didn't you let us know you were coming so we could be watching for your tall, dark and brooding self?” She smiled as she wiped away the tears.

  “I wanted to surprise everyone, but I believe it was me that was most surprised!”

  “You didn't say anything when we met today. I thought you were trying to spark me! I know that look and you had it in your eyes.”

  “Well, you didn't seem to mind it too much.” He laughed. “The truth of it is, I didn't recognize you either. All I knew was that I had just seen the most beautiful girl on earth. I thought I was in love. You are just too pretty for words, my Princess. Why, Mr. Hamilton had to knock me down out of the clouds. No wonder I'm having to come and save you from marriage and all its drudgery. I'm sure there's plenty of fellows out there wanting to get their hands on you.”

  She giggled nervously, trying to hide the fact that she'd felt drawn to him too. She was uncomfortable with the oddity of the situation. Here he was, the only man that had ever made her heart skip a beat and it was John. Here, her idol stood before her and she wished he'd have been anyone but him. He seemed to be unconcerned by it all. Perhaps because he didn't know that she'd felt the same. Or, could it be because he hadn't had a crush on her for these many years like she'd had on him? She made an attempt at conversation. “You look well! Life is treating you good then, huh?.”

  “I can't complain about anything except the years I've missed. And you... I don't know where Little Sarah's gone off to. You grew up so quickly.” John eyes brimmed with tears then he quickly changed the subject. “Come on, let's go! I'm aching to get home and see Momma.”

  “She's going to be so happy! I can't wait to see the look on her face when she sees you! Will you stay out and let me go in first and set her up for the surprise?”

  “Sure, but don't make me wait too long. I might just burst through the door. I'm so anxious to see her. I've missed all of you so much.”

  When they got home, John waited outside and Sarah went in. “Momma, I have a gift for you.” She beamed in excitement.

  “Well, where is it?” Marion looked around from the cook stove.

  “It's outside. It's a grand surprise! Everyone close your eyes and I'll bring it in! You sit here, Momma and keep your eyes closed really tight until I say open them.” Sarah's voice was high and full of joy. Her eyes were sparkling and brimming with tears.

  “I haven't got time for your games, Sarah. You're acting a fool! I'm trying to cook and here you come in with some crazy nonsense.” Marion was visibly aggravated. “I've got supper to get on the table.”

  “But, Momma, this is really good. It's something you've been wanting for a long time now, so sit down and close your eyes, please. Don't be mad.”

  “All right, all right! Just hurry it up. I have things to tend on the stove.” Marion sat in her chair and propped her face in her hands with eyes closed.

  Sarah motioned and John quietly slipped through the door and knelt down in front of his mother. “Now, Momma! Open your eyes!” Sarah sang out.

  Marion looked and was face to face with her boy. “John?!” She threw her arms up in the air.

  “I'm home, Momma.” He nodded.

  “John! Is it truly you? Oh, my little John! You're home, you're really home!” She held his face in her hands as she cried. Tears streamed down both their faces as they hugged each other.

  “I've missed you so much, Momma! I've missed all of you.” He looked around the room, his eyes resting on Sarah.

  “Oh John, you're as poor as a snake. You haven't been eating right!” She looked him over until she seemed satisfied that he was not a figment of her imagination. “Let me get you some supper cooked up. I'll have you well and hearty in no time. What has the world done to my chubby little boy?”

  “Momma, I wish you'd just sit down and talk to me. It's been so long since I've heard your sweet voice or seen your pretty face.”

  “Well, it doesn't look like you've had a decent meal since you left here.”

  “I haven't. Nobody can cook like you, but I haven't seen any of you since I left here either, and that's what I missed the most. Tell me about everything and how everyone is.” He said as he looked over at the twins. “My Lord... is this Jennie and Bettie?”

  “Yes.” They both smiled. “It's us.”

  “Come give your ol’ brother a hug! I know you don't remember me, but I remember you two. You were what... three when I left? Babies, just babies. Now look at you, beautiful young women.”

  They smiled brightly. “We remember you.” Jennie assured him. “You used to read to us all the time.”

  “And we remember you from your letters home too.” Betty chimed in. They both hugged him.

  “I have something for each of you.” John picked up his bag and sat down, his eyes twinkling as if he were Santa Claus as he pulled out the two gilded music boxes. When the lids were lifted the music began to play.

  “Oh, I've wanted one of these so bad! We both have!” Betty squealed. “How did you know?”

  “Oh, I have my ways.” John winked. “Magical ways.” He stretched his eyes wide.

  To Marion he gave a cameo. She cried as he pinned it to her blouse top. “You're the most thoughtful son.” She went to the mirror to gaze upon the lovely trinket.

  “Now, tell me about everyone and everything.” John smiled. “I'm all ears.”

  “We got a letter from D.J., they're in Texas now. Lord only knows what they're doing way out there. He said no sooner had they parked their wagon than Mable and three of the children took down with the fever. They lost little May but everyone else came through. Cora and her rich man are still living the high life in Virginia and their second child is on the way. And what can I say about Nathan... He's still Nathan. That just leaves us.” Marion wistfully sighed.

  “How are you two doing, Momma? You and Poppa?”

  “Good, we're doing good.”

  “The house is just beautiful.” John stood and walked around. “It's even more wonderful than you described in your letters. This sure was money well spent, wasn't it?”

  “We're certainly proud of it, son.” They walked with John into the parlor and sat down.

  “This is more like it.” John said as he sank down into one of the crushed velvet chairs. There were two of these golden-yellow, high-backed chairs at each end of the long, velvet settee. “Shoot, this is as fine as Tyson's place.” John seemed pleased. “And he's the r
ichest man in Rochester.”

  Marion perked up and squeaked. “How elegant we must be!”

  There was a knock at the front door. As Jennie opened it, they saw a tall, slender, young man nervously clutching his hat. “I— is Miss Sarah in?” he stuttered.

  “Yes.” Jennie answered, standing there with her arms folded staring at the man.

  “Uh, um, could I speak with her?”

  “Wait here and I'll ask her if she wants to speak to you.” She slammed the door in his face. Sarah laughed.

  “Tell him I'm busy today with family from out of state.”

  “Jennie, you had no business slamming the door in his face like that” Marion scolded. “We've taught you better! And don't you look so innocent, Sarah. I know you put her up to it! You should treat your callers better than you do. You're going to get a bad name. If he wants to take you for a ride, you should go with him. Don't blame it on John being here. He'll be here when you get back.”

  “Sarah, if you want to, you can go. I wouldn't mind.”

  “It's not because of you, John.” Marion informed him. “She treats them all rudely. All except for Shane Thompson.

  “Shane Thompson. Who's this?”

  “He's just a friend, but everyone thinks we're in love because we're so close. We've played together since we were little. His sister is my best friend, too. I suppose I'm in love with her as well.” Sarah grinned sarcastically.

  Jennie opened the door. “Sarah is too busy today,” she told the young man

  “I'd just like to know if I can escort her to the barn dance at Mr. Willmont's this coming Saturday,” he told Jennie. “I won't take up much of her time.”