Pretend for Me

by Sam Crescent

  “No, he’s not right for you because his bank balance doesn’t help yours. You all disgust me. Everything is about money, wealth and money. You’re not the people I thought you were.” Gazing around at the wedding she saw through the happy couple. Were Danny and Bethany even in love, or were they doing what they were told?

  “Stop your yelling.” Her mother finally spoke up. “We’re looking out for you, Sara.”

  Sara growled at her words. All of her life that was the excuse they gave her for stopping her doing something. “The only person you’re looking out for is yourself. What you did has nothing to do with protection or love.”

  They’re looking out for her? Bullshit.

  The world is full of bad people. So what?

  “You’re killing me.” She shouted at them. For too long she’d let them control her. “All my life I’ve been trying to do something on my own, and you’re always taking it away from me. I’m not living. I’m doing as I’m told with no way to fight back. Stay out of my life.”

  Staring at each of them in turn she knew her words were falling on deaf ears. They thought she was having a temper tantrum. Her family only saw what they wanted to see.

  She couldn’t handle what they’d done. Andy was a good man through and through, and because he’d wanted more from her, her family had gone out to destroy it. Turning on her heel she walked away. She was through with her family. This time she wouldn’t be coming back. She was done with her family. They’d ruined her life for the last time.

  “Sara, wait.” Dylan called her name as he chased after her. All of her family was watching the scene unfold. “He’s not worth it. Come back to the party.”

  “Why? So you can claim to be the victor? You haven’t won anything here, Dylan. Why are you still trying?” Sara folded her arms over her chest. Her anger was fighting to explode out of her like a different being from herself.

  “We were always supposed to be together, Sara. Andy was in the way, and he could never look after you like I can. He was going to use you and move onto the next woman.”

  Shaking her head, she looked at her ex and felt like a total fool. For years she’d been keeping this weasel’s secret. No more. He really thought she wanted him back. Lashing out, she slapped him around the face with one hand then with the other, hoping he hurt.

  “You can’t talk. Why don’t you tell my parents why I walked away from you? Let them all know how you proposed to me then intended to sleep with another girl.” She shoved him hard, angry at him for ruining Andy’s life. “Andy may not have had your money, but he was a million times better a man than you’ll ever be.”

  Before she gave them a chance to argue with her, she stormed off. The floral pink dress she wore hindered her flight. Sara continued running forward determined never to look back. For the first time in her life she’d found love. She was in love with Andy Green, and her family had ruined any chance of her experiencing it.

  Grabbing one of the waiting taxis she gave the driver her address then sat back. She watched the town where she grew up float away. Sara closed her eyes relishing the feel of freedom. Her family would no longer make any choices for her.

  “Was it a bad wedding, Miss?” the driver asked.

  She gazed down at the pink dress and smiled. “It wasn’t bad.”

  The party was a nightmare, but she was determined to make the future a much better one.

  Once the cab pulled up outside of her apartment she paid the driver cash and ran up the stairs. She didn’t go to her room but went straight to Andy’s room. As she’d left his keys with all of her stuff, she used the spare key under the mat she to open the door.

  “Andy? Are you home?” She closed the door. The silence felt deafening.

  He wasn’t home.

  She went through to the kitchen, put the kettle on to make herself a drink. When she’d made her drink Sara sat on the sofa waiting for him to turn up.

  After three cups of coffee, the sun had disappeared from the sky, and Sara knew he wasn’t coming home.

  The first tear fell as she made her way down to her apartment. She saw her cases left outside her door. A single note in Andy’s writing lay on the top.

  Sara grabbed the letter tearing into the pristine white paper.

  Sara,

  I went back to the wedding and you were gone. I brought these back for you because I knew you’d miss them. I’m sorry about how this has played out. I’ve taken Champion with me. He’s the only thing I have left.

  Take care, Andy x

  Collapsing against the door she felt the tears she’d been keeping at bay start to fall. She loved Andy, and he was gone.

  She pushed her cases into her room then left them to go to her computer. Her publisher had left her an email. The book she’d sent in they wanted to publish. The news should have made her happy. It didn’t. The letter she held in her hand caused her more despair than she could have ever imagined.

  ****

  After walking around the town he’d decided to go back and grab his things. When he’d seen the smashed bouquet of roses he’d figured Sara had moved on.

  Dylan sat on the step drinking a glass of scotch. Tracy was waiting for him. Seeing Sara’s sister surprised him.

  “Where’s Sara?” he asked.

  “She left. You walked away, and she got in a cab and was gone. We’ve been trying to reach her, but her cell phone is up with her belongings and she won’t answer her apartment phone.” Tracy tapped her cell phone against her leg. “She’s in love with you,” she said.

  “Sara was always supposed to be mine,” Dylan said. He no longer looked like the reserved man Andy had met several times but a man who had lost everything.

  “Shut it, you. She should have ratted you out to Mom and Dad years ago.”

  Champion came running out of the house. “I’ll take her things back to her apartment. You got what you wanted. I’m not going to be causing any waves.”

  Tracy stared at him for several minutes refusing to let him into the house. “You’re going to walk away?”

  He shrugged. “I’ve got nothing left to offer her. It’s better this way, and I see that now.”

  “You’re a fool.” Tracy moved aside and let him pass.

  Andy spent a great deal of time gathering her stuff. Someone cleared his throat, and when he turned around he saw it was her older brother, Danny.

  “What’s the matter? Have you come to gloat at how you got rid of her boyfriend?” Andy asked, no longer in the mood to be nice.

  “I had nothing to do with what happened. Bethany means the world to me. I’ve always taken everything for granted. I’m the oldest, and I’ve never had to put up with the shit that they throw the others. Even Jake’s women get a security check on them.”

  Danny walked in taking a seat.

  “You’re telling me you had nothing to do with shutting me down?” Andy stood holding one of Sara’s negligees.

  “Nope. No matter what people think I’ve always been in love with Bethany. She’s the woman for me, and I asked her to marry me when we finished college. She refused. I’ve spent the last few years giving her space and convincing her I wanted her for more than her family.” Danny laughed. “I don’t think you’re a bad guy. Sara, well, she’s the baby.”

  “She’s a twenty-six year old woman who should be free to make her own choices.”

  Andy placed her clothing back into the case.

  “Sara is trusting, and she’s not like us. We know how the world works, but she’s always been different. When we were younger she used to lie out on the lawn and stare at the sky. She was convinced if she stayed there long enough she’d move with the rotation of the planet.” Danny chuckled running a hand through his hair. “She never cared for material goods, and it took several barbeques before she’d even look Dylan’s way. She had a crush on him but wouldn’t do anything about it. Her whole life was devoted to books. I remember she used to write in her little journal anything that took her fancy.”
r />   “Why are you telling me all this?”

  Danny stood slapping him on the back. “So you realize we did everything because in our own messed up way, we love her. It’s not a good enough excuse, but I see what we’ve done. We messed up, and I’m sorry. She’s the baby, and she was never designed for this way of life. You’ve lost your clubs and whatever else with money, but Sara never saw that in you. She saw who you were. Think about that before you walk away from her as the clubs can be opened back up. Your life isn’t completely ruined.”

  “I can’t just open them back up. I don’t have the funds to do so.”

  Danny shrugged. “There’s always a way.”

  Her brother left him to finish packing. There was no other way for him to open up his clubs. He didn’t care what the other man said.

  Andy was more confused as he bundled their cases into his car then let Champion ride up the front with him. Was Danny on his side or warning him?

  Sara wasn’t money oriented. Andy knew that in the way she worked. Her apartment had barely any furniture in it at all.

  “What does it all mean?” he asked.

  Dropping the cases outside of her door he made his way up to his apartment to see the spare key had been taken. He knew Sara was waiting for him. Instead of going in to face her, he went down to her apartment to wait.

  When the sun went down he saw her in the beautiful floral pink bridesmaid dress. Andy watched her from a secluded alcove in the apartment hall. He watched the tears fall onto her cheeks, and he felt like the world’s biggest asshole. His hands itched to be touching her. Already he felt lost without her but knew this was the right thing for him to do.

  She walked inside her apartment and closed the door. He went to her door pressing his palm against the wood.

  His love for her was not in question.

  Turning away he went to the elevator that took him down to the underground parking. He took his cell phone out of his pocket and dialed Travis’s number.

  His friend picked up on the fifth ring. “I thought you were supposed to be at a wedding?”

  “I was.” Andy gave him an update on everything that had happened in the last few hours.

  “Shit, are you okay?” Travis asked.

  “I’m fine. I’m going to be out of town for a while. I was wondering if you and the guys would keep an eye on Sara for me while I’m gone.”

  “She’s serious for you?”

  Andy ran a hand over his face. “She’s the most serious thing in my life. I love her, Travis. Please, will you take care of her, but make sure she doesn’t know you’re there because of me.”

  “I’ll take care of her. The guys and I will be there for you. Where are you going?”

  “I don’t know. I’ll keep in touch with you guys. Thank you for doing this for me.”

  “You’re a friend. I’ll do anything to make sure you are okay.”

  Nodding his head, Andy said goodbye and climbed behind the wheel.

  “We’re going on a road trip, buddy.” He scratched behind Champion’s ears then started up the car.

  Andy pulled out of the underground parking without looking back.

  Chapter Seventeen

  The days passed, and Sara refused to have anything to do with her family. Some of her days were spent inside Andy’s apartment. When her pain was too unbearable she would lie on his bed feeling his masculine scent surround her. How could they have gone so wrong? Sara would have helped him, put a stop to it. All he needed to do was tell her what was going wrong. She stared around the small space, and her mind was bombarded with images of them together. Sara remembered how he made her laugh when she’d spent a miserable day writing in front of a computer. Andy had become her rock.

  Her brothers tried to reach her along with her parents and sister. There was nothing they could say to her. For too long she’d let them rule her life to the point the one man she’d truly fallen for had been pushed away. She missed him all the time. Not a moment passed when her thoughts weren’t filled with him. They’d had something, and because of her meddling family they’d taken it away. Dylan tried to call her, in between calls from her family. At the moment Dylan and her family were not talking. She had even listened to her father as he told her through an answering machine message, that they’d withdrawn their shares from Dylan’s company. They were pulling away from Dylan and trying all they could to repair the damage to Andy’s clubs, but the clubs were not as yet for sale. She always hung up the phone but listened to her family’s messages, and finally after three weeks she changed her number without telling them. They would find her number out, but until then she would enjoy the peace. Just because they were helping Andy now, didn’t mean she’d forgive them so easily. She wasn’t throwing a tantrum; she was serious. Sara didn’t want anything to do with her family.

  After some time passed she stopped going to Andy’s apartment and handed the spare key over to the landlord. She needed to stop obsessing over him, and the key always gave her hope, then took it away.

  Andy never called her, and when she went to his apartment a few days after handing in the key, she discovered he’d moved out. The pain she felt at his loss was more than she could bear. Seeing the new couple in his apartment woke her up. Andy was gone, and he was never coming back.

  Cube remained closed. She ran her hand over the sign whenever she passed the club. They’d wasted so much time dancing around each other instead of giving into the need they both had craved. Looking back she saw the attraction had started between them the moment they first met on the apartment stairs. They’d been friends, but that was merely a ploy for them to spend more time with each other.

  She saw his friends hanging around on occasion. They’d smile and wave at her in acknowledgment. They never spoke to her directly.

  Life needed to move on. The days turned into weeks, and those weeks turned into months. The sale of the clubs went ahead, but she didn’t have enough money to pay for them. She didn’t know who did buy them, only that they were sold to a private firm.

  She threw herself into her work, her muse working overtime to get books finished in time with the schedule she’d set out for herself.

  Her publisher organized a book tour around the local city hot spots. The latest book she wrote was hitting all of the bestseller lists. She’d been surprised to see it in paperback on the shelves. Her publisher told her they wanted her book to be available for all readers. The e-book outsold all of her other books. The friends-to-lovers story seemed to capture a huge crowd. When she logged onto her blog she discovered a surge of activity on her site. She’d never seen such an amazing response. The characters of Andrew and Sarah—not original names for herself and Andy, but they worked—were talked about all over the web. She didn’t understand why. Either way, her publisher loved the success and asked for more work.

  Sara wished she could be overjoyed with the news, but she couldn’t. Every time she saw the book cover, tears filled her eyes and an ache filled her chest. That book had been written with Andy in mind. The couple on the page looked nothing like her and Andy. In her mind she knew who the story was about. The first weekend they’d spent being a pretend couple had started it all. That was how the book began. The book’s ending at least was a happier one. There wouldn’t be any happy ending for her.

  The book signings had been a new experience. She sat behind a desk expecting to wait for a few women to show up for a signing. Never in all of her life had she imagined the queues that were waiting for her. Women talked to her endlessly about the love of her life. People had even gone and visited the town where she grew up. Her family tried to contact her, but she ignored them. The success of her story was all down to her. They couldn’t take that away from her. Her publisher had told her she’d made it, and she wouldn’t have to worry again. The news felt good even if she had no one to share the success with. Her friends tried to reassure her.

  She invited them round for a drink one Friday night.

  “Why can’t yo
u ask his friends?” Tiffany asked.

  Sara shrugged her shoulders sipping the expensive red wine she’d bought in celebration. She’d decided celebrating with a drink was better than mourning what she couldn’t have with Andy. But without Andy it didn’t feel like much of a celebration.

  “You’ve got to stop this, Sara,” Samantha said, clicking her fingers in front of her face. “Why is Andy different from all the other men you’ve dated?”

  “Yeah, listen to Samantha. Why is he different?” Tiffany voiced the same questions.

  Tears welled in Sara’s eyes, and she forced them down with a growl. “Because I was never in love with the other men I dated. Andy was different. He never took my family’s money. They purposefully closed him down. I saw how much those clubs meant to him, and they took it away because he refused to back down.” She dropped her head in her hands. “I sound like a lovelorn sap, don’t I?”

  Their arms surrounded her. “You sound in love,” they both said together.

  Sara laughed feeling a little happier they weren’t judging her.

  The book signings were getting more frequent as the days went on. She spent less time at the computer and more time travelling. The success meant she had no choice with regards to the signings. They thought it was going to hit all the right spots for everyone. The book held just the right amount of heat and romance that women wanted. The book was simply titled Friends with Benefits. It wasn’t an original title but fit the whole book.

  Sara furnished the rest of her apartment without Andy’s help. After finding out he’d left without a backwards glance, she’d been tempted to leave herself. She loved her apartment and decided staying was the best course of action for her. She really wanted to speak with him and apologize for what her family had done. Cube and the rest of his clubs continued to be closed, and nothing was happening to them. The people who’d bought them hadn’t changed them at all. She passed them every day in the hope that she’d see him. Sara started to feel like a stalker in her spare time.

  Andy clearly wanted nothing to do with her.