Pretend for Me

by Sam Crescent

  When she passed a café near her apartment and saw his friends sitting there eating before she could stop herself she walked next to their table. They stopped eating as they looked at her.

  “I’m so sorry to bother you,” she said.

  Travis was the first one to speak. “Take a seat.”

  Wade moved up giving her room. She declined coffee and stared at her hands. They hadn’t spoken since they’d come around Andy’s place to watch football.

  “I was wondering if you’d heard from Andy. I haven’t seen or heard from him. I wanted to apologize to him. My family shouldn’t have done what they did.” She paused when she felt the tears clog her throat. “I’m sorry. Everything has been a mess,” she said. Sara rubbed her eyes. What kind of a woman was she, to be trying to contact a man even though he’d made it clear he didn’t want to be in contact with her?

  “We haven’t heard from him recently. The last time he talked to us, he asked us not to pass on any information of where he was, but we can tell you he’s safe, Sara,” Lenny said. He reached out and patted her hands.

  “He hates me. I get that. Not many men would want to stay around when the girl’s parents destroys their livelihood.”

  “Andy doesn’t care about that, Sara. He’s getting his stuff together. He’ll be in touch when he’s ready,” Travis said, updating her.

  The tears fell thick and fast. She was tired of crying. All she wanted to do was move on from the crap of her life. Why did it feel so damned hard to do? “Erm … I was wondering if you could tell him that I have a signing and I’d really like to talk to him.” She reached in her pocket for the leaflet with the details of the signing. Sara handed over the leaflet she’d been given by her publisher. “It should be good, I think. I’ll go and leave you in peace.”

  She stood and left the shop, the pain in her heart worse than anything she could have imagined.

  ****

  Andy stared down at the leaflet Travis had given him. The picture on the front showed Sara holding a copy of her latest book. He’d read Friends with Benefits several times. The inspiration behind the storyline was obvious.

  “She’s hurting, Andy. I’ve seen her standing outside of Cube crying. This is a lot harder than I ever thought. You have to do something about it.”

  Travis turned away from him. He watched his friend run his fingers through his hair in agitation.

  “I never thought I’d say this, but you need to speak with her. You’re meant to be together.”

  Andy started laughing. In the past few months he’d grown a beard. He ran his fingers over the growth while he looked at his friend.

  “Are you telling me, Travis, that you think I should marry this girl?”

  Travis faced him looking him up and down. “You look like shit. You’ve not been the same since you left her. If I can see this then the others can. You love her, Andy. Go and get her.”

  Andy shook his head. “There is nothing I can offer her. Shit, I’ve got nothing to my name.”

  “You’re a fucking coward if you’re going to let that little matter worry you. Don’t you see?” Travis asked.

  “See what?” Andy turned the leaflet over. Seeing Sara even on the small leaflet felt good to him. The only pictures he possessed were the few he’d taken on his phone. None of them were anything like having her in his arms.

  “Her family won, and so did her ex. You’re gone, and she thinks you hate her.”

  “I could never hate her,” Andy said.

  “Look at it from her perspective. Her family came in, took over, and now she’s alone because you left without a goodbye.”

  Hearing Travis speak the truth gave him little comfort. He’d not done anything to harm her. His love for Sara was the only thing keeping him going.

  “That book signing is in a couple of days. If you don’t react now she’ll be lost forever.”

  Travis words hung in the air like a warning.

  “I thought you didn’t believe in marriage or committing yourself to one woman?” Andy asked. He remembered his friends, including Travis, adamantly refusing to have anything to do with women who wanted more than a good time. What had changed in Travis for him to want Andy to go to Sara?

  “I don’t want marriage, Andy. I’m not the marrying kind. I can’t keep it in my pants long enough to make a commitment, but you can. Sara isn’t a woman you screw and leave. She’s the keeping kind.”

  He watched Travis leave the small apartment he’d been living in. For the past few months he’d been working in a mechanics shop to pay his way. The bank couldn’t help him out of the bind he’d gotten himself into. Andy had no choice but to file for bankruptcy, and the clubs had since been sold off.

  Sitting down on his sofa he stared at the picture of Sara. She smiled while holding her recent book, but the smile didn’t reach her eyes. There was no happiness at her success. He stared intently into her deep green eyes and saw the pain he felt in his heart.

  Sara was hurting just as much as he was.

  Champion barked to let him know his dog was still waiting to go for a walk. He put the leaflet down then grabbed his book and headed for the park.

  The park was busy with people on lunch break or letting their kids wander around in peace. He let Champion off the leash and sat on the bench reading Friends with Benefits.

  He’d read the book several times, but each time he read it, he saw some of their memories together played out on the page.

  “That’s one good book you’re reading,” a woman said taking the seat next to him. She was a heavy set older woman.

  “She’s a good writer.”

  “Captures the emotion of every scene and I just can’t put it down. I’m driving my old man mad with my obsession with this book.”

  Andy chuckled. He’d never had a woman sit next to him to talk about a book.

  “If you ask me, this woman has her own personal Andrew,” the woman said.

  “What do you mean?” he asked, flicking through the pages of the book.

  “The author knows about love. The way she tells it just pulls on my heart strings. I wish I knew who her Andrew was. I could kiss him.”

  The woman stopped talking as she grabbed her own copy out of her bag.

  He flicked through to the front page where the dedication was. Every time he’d read the book he’d skipped the dedication not wanting to get a view of her personal thoughts.

  To Andy, you know who you are. Without you in my life I wouldn’t have been able to write this book. You’ve given me hope when I thought I was going to fail. This book, and in fact all my writing, is for you. You own my heart and always will. I love you completely and not just as a friend. Yours forever, S.

  She’d confessed her feelings for him in a dedication. He turned the book over in his hands and saw the whole story with new eyes. The book to everyone else was a love story between friends. To him, this was a story declaring Sara’s love for him. She’d never spoken the words directly to him, but no one could mistake what she meant.

  He got up off the bench and called Champion to him.

  There was a fight he needed to start.

  Chapter Eighteen

  Andy shaved away the beard and packed up his clothing. He filled his car with the few belongings he’d not packed away in storage. Champion barked at him in between intervals of him packing up his car. He ignored his dog as he sorted through his plan of attack with regards to her family.

  He told the mechanics place he wouldn’t be back and thanked them for the time they’d given him. Once he was done with his close contacts, he jumped in his car and started towards Sara’s hometown. He needed to talk with her parents and then with Dylan Cross in the city. They needed to know he wasn’t backing down. He was in love with Sara and was going to marry her.

  Backing down was no longer an option. Sara was his woman, and he intended to fight for her until the end. He could make her happy. The last five years proved to him he was the right man for the job.


  Her entire family was at the house. Andy counted the cars then made his way round the back of the house where he found them eating. They all stopped when they saw him.

  Tracy stood and hugged him close. “Have you heard from Sara?” she asked.

  “You haven’t?” He frowned when he saw her sister shake her head.

  “She doesn’t want to have anything to do with us,” Tracy said.

  Sara had picked him over her family. The revelations he was discovering startled him. Sara loved her family even if they drove her insane.

  “Why are you here?” Danny asked.

  “I’m here to tell you I’m not going anywhere. I love your daughter.” He stared at Martin and Harmony. “And I know she loves me. You can do whatever the hell you want to me. I want you to know I’m not going to run. I love Sara, and I’m going to marry her.”

  Martin stood, followed by the rest of her family. “We underestimated you. Sara hasn’t spoken to us since the wedding. Make my daughter happy, and even though this doesn’t make amends for what happened, I hope it can help with our apology.” Martin held out an envelope.

  Confused, Andy took the envelope and looked inside to see the deeds for his club. They were still in his name. “You bought the clubs?”

  “We’re trying to repair the damage done to you. I love my daughter, and I want to see her happy.” Martin offered his hand. “You’re the man for the job.”

  Andy stared at the hand held out to him. The desire to walk away was strong. They were Sara’s family, and he intended to keep the peace and be better than they were.

  Once he was done with her family he travelled back to the city to speak to Dylan. He walked into the large building. The receptionist asked for him to wait. Andy waited for an hour. He knew what Dylan was doing. They needed to have words before he went and claimed Sara for his own. He wasn’t running anymore, and he was going to show Dylan he wasn’t going to be intimidated.

  After two hours of waiting Dylan made his way down to the reception. Andy stood wearing his faded blue jeans and white shirt while Dylan wore top of the range Italian designed suit. This man was a world apart from Andy.

  You’re the one who can make her happy. She ran from this man because she didn’t love him.

  Andy squared his shoulders and held out his hand.

  “Andy.” Dylan shook his hand.

  “Dylan.” Andy tightened his grip.

  Silence descended between them. Andy stared at his former opponent.

  “Let us take this to my office.”

  They travelled in silence up to the top floor.

  When they were inside his office with the door closed Andy finally spoke. “You’ve made a good life for yourself.”

  “I intended to share it with Sara.” Dylan took a seat behind his desk.

  “I have her family’s backing. They know I can make her happy.”

  He saw the smile slip on Dylan’s face. “You’ve got nothing to make her happy.”

  “I know, and that must be eating you up inside to know she picked me instead of you. You can offer her the world whereas I can offer her nothing.” Andy took the seat opposite the desk. He didn’t feel small.

  Dylan merely wanted something that he could never have, Sara, and all her money.

  “Why are you here?” Dylan asked. All trace of friendship was gone. The man before him was the businessman.

  “To tell you to back off from Sara and from me. I know it was you who organized the bank to reject my loan extension, and you’re the one who shut down my clubs.”

  The other man sat back with his hands behind his head. “Why should I do that?”

  There was no denial of what Andy said.

  “Because you’ve got no chance of winning. Sara is my woman, and you’ve got no chance at her. You can either accept it or continue fighting, but I should warn you, Sara will be by my side throughout it all.”

  Andy sat back staring at the other man. His gaze never broke from his. Finally, Dylan looked away.

  “You’ll never make her happy. You haven’t got what it takes.”

  “I’ve been making her happy for the past five years. All you’ve been doing was making her miserable. I know what it’s like to love her, Dylan. You don’t love her. You want the power being married to her could bring you, but she doesn’t love you. You’re wasting your time and money. Even her family wants nothing to do with you. You lost, Dylan, and Sara is mine. There are women out there who want what you’re offering.”

  “Yes, I screwed up. Sara was always supposed to be mine, and I took it for granted,” Dylan said.

  “Did you even love her?” Andy asked.

  Dylan stared at him for several minutes. “No. She was there, and it was easy. My parents wanted us to get together, and I didn’t fight it. I didn’t see a point to fight it.”

  “Then why try to take her from me?”

  “She was there, and it was easy,” Dylan said again, then shook his head. “Yeah, I lost a great deal of investment because of her. Her family has pulled out all of their funding. It’s not a problem. You can leave now.”

  “You really don’t care?”

  “No, I don’t. Money makes the world go ‘round, not love or commitment. Danny will learn that.”

  It was a cold way to look at the world. Dylan was blind to what he could have had. Andy shook hands with the other man then made his way out of the building. Andy felt better than he ever felt before. Dylan was never going to try to come between them. He pulled out the leaflet and saw the signing was tomorrow. Andy found a motel for the night. There was nowhere else for him to go.

  He sat on the bed staring at the ceiling. In his mind he was with Sara, her naked body pressed against his as he took her. The morning couldn’t come too soon for him

  ****

  The day of the book signing Sara got up and checked her emails. Her publisher had sent her a contract to sign for her latest book. She scrolled through the words and then put it aside to sign later. Next came several emails from agents offering to represent her.

  She pushed them into the file she’d designed to answer later. Her career was moving faster than she ever imagined. Glancing down at her watch she saw she had two hours left to get ready and arrive at the book store for her signing.

  After a quick shower Sara dressed for the event in a pink summer dress. The shade of pink didn’t make her hair look garish. She wasn’t the most color coordinated person and wished her hair had been a shade of brown at least.

  Sara settled with no makeup then made her way out of her apartment. She waited for the taxi to pick her up. The taxi dropped her off outside the store. Before going in she grabbed a coffee and a sandwich from the deli shop down the road.

  On her way back she saw plenty of people milling around the street. She ignored them and made her way into the shop.

  “Miss Carroll, I’m so pleased you could make it.”

  With the success of her book her real name had been found out. All of her books now possessed her given name instead of her pen name.

  She shook hands with the manager and a few of her team. “We’ve got everything set up for you.”

  “Why is there a podium?” she asked when the manager led her over to a stand.

  “Your publisher agreed to you answering some questions about the book. The readers love your work and want to know more.”

  Not saying anything, she listened as the manager took her through the schedule. Sara finished her breakfast and then went into the staffroom to wait for the right time.

  When she was called out she didn’t expect to find what greeted her.

  Sara stared at the mass of people crowded in the book shop. She thought the manager had been kidding when she informed her that her book had been one of the biggest sellers in a long time. The manager had asked for her to take some questions. There were so many women who wanted to know so much about the book. She had agreed not expecting so many people. There were even a few television crews to film it.r />
  “I didn’t think it would be this busy,” Sara whispered to the manager.

  “I wasn’t expecting the television crews. I wonder why that is.”

  Smiling at the woman Sara walked out to where she needed to be.

  She stood on the podium and wished the floor would open up and eat her. Her age and the success were doing the rounds. Her parents kept calling, which she still refused to answer. Why was she thinking about her parents when all those people were staring at her?

  Shaking her head, Sara waited for the first question to come her way.

  The woman nearest fired her questions at her.

  “What made you write the book?”

  “Will there be another one?”

  “Where did you get your inspiration from?”

  The questions continued to be fired at her. She turned toward the manager, who settled the crowd down. Sara’s hands were shaking as they spoke. The manager pointed to a woman to ask the first question.

  “Is the book based around life experiences?” the woman asked.

  Andy. The book is about him.

  Shaking her head Sara looked over the crowd of people. The book had been written because of Andy. He inspired her to write the book. He and the change in their relationship had been the real motivation. She thought of Andy but shook her head anyway. “The book is a work of fiction. It has no basis on my life.” In her heart, it had been otherwise while she’d been writing it, but not now.

  In the book the couple lives happily ever after. What did I get? Nothing!

  The manager pointed to another woman.

  How am I going to survive this? They want to know details, and I’ve not got them. The truth is too damn painful.

  She’d been trying to get over the man she loved. With the success of the book she felt she couldn’t go anywhere without thinking about him. The book was a constant reminder of what she’d lost because of her family.

  Running her fingers through her hair, Sara listened to a woman repeat the question. She needed to survive this.

  “The lead character, Andrew, he feels so real to me. Is he still in your life?” another woman asked.

  This was so hard. Tears filled her eyes, and she looked down at a copy of her book that was pressed into her hands. She flicked through the pages wishing she could make him appear. They’d left so many things unsaid. Had he even read a copy of her book? She’d put her feelings out there for him to see and read. So many people skimmed the dedication when in fact it was really the best part of the book. Did Andy even know the book existed? If he did, did he skip the dedication? The dedication showed the author’s thoughts and feelings. She’d dedicated the book to Andy because it had been written with him in mind.