“Aren't you going to answer?” Lucy asked.
“No, it's him. I don't want to speak to him.”
It kept ringing and when it stopped it started again.
“OH Cas, you're acting childish. Just answer, you have to speak to him.”Lucy snapped.
“No,it's finished. I don't want him anymore. I hate him,” I said in a broken voice.
“Sure Cas you hate him, I believe that,"
She said sarcastically. " Stop it will you? You love him, give him a chance to explain and then decide if you want to leave him or not,please,” she begged.
The mobile kept ringing.
“Oh give me that damned phone,” she said taking my mobile from my hands,she pushed the button so that I could hear what he was saying.
“Hello.”Lucy said.
“Cas,please let me explain. Please. you know I love you.”
“Tyler wait, it's me Lucy.”She interrupted.
“Oh Sorry Luc. Please tell Cassidy that I'm sorry. That it's not as it seems. I have never cheated on her.”He told her desperately.
“Tyler I don't know what to tell you. I told her to give you time to explain but she doesn't want.”
“Let me talk to her, tell her I'm waiting for her here.”
“Here where?” Lucy asked alarmed.
“In front of your aunt's house. Please tell her to come out and talk to me. I'm freezing. “ He said in a broken voice,was he crying?
“What? No Tyler you have to go,my aunt will soon be here please.” Lucy pleaded.
“I'm not moving from here until she comes out.” And saying that he hung up. Lucy looked at me still holding the mobile in her hands..
"Cas,you have to go and talk to him. Aunt Lizzy will soon be here. She can't see him here. It's raining hard,he's out there, my God Cas?!”
“I said no!” I said again, for me he could froze to death after what he's done. I thought.
Lucy opened the door.
“Go Cassidy, please you'll be in trouble. Aunt Lizzy would want to know who he is. She will tell your mum, please.“ Lucy said trying to convince me.
“No, you go, tell him I hate him and not to talk to me ever again,” I shouted.
“I won't. I'm not ready to lose you.”
Lucy and me both stared at him. He was at the door, soaked,water dripping down from him.
“Tyler you can't stay here, my aunt is coming, please.” Lucy said in desperation.
“I'm sorry Lucy but I won't move from here unless she accepts to come with me,” he said steadily.
Lucy looked at me, begging me with her eyes.
“Cassy I love you, believe me when I say that. I would never harm you.”
“No, you slept with another woman,” I shouted at him.
“I swear on my life, No I swear on my mother, you know how much I love her. I have never cheated on you. Please! Damned Cassy why are you believing a person you haven't ever even
met and not me ?”
“Cassy he's right.” Lucy said
“Shut up Luc.”I was angry I stilled looked at him, his eyes full of pain and sadness.
“Come with me Cassy. I'll tell you everything and I'll explain why I didn’t want to have sex with you.”
I didn't reply. He grabbed my hand and pulled me out.
“Lucy, she won't come back tonight,” he informed her.
“What? No Tyler she has to. What can I tell my Aunt?”
“Tell her she has a migraine and she went to sleep early. Please, close the door of her room. Do whatever you want? She'll stay with me even if she doesn't want me anymore OK?”
I was going to protest but he didn't give me a chance, he just dragged me out with him.
CHAPTER 33
He held my hand pulling me while we walked in the rain. I pushed my hand away from him.
“Cassy what are you doing?” he asked.
“I'm not coming anywhere with you. If you want to talk we'll do it here,” I shouted.
He stared at me,“Here? In the middle of the street. It's raining.”He said, stating the obvious.
“I don't care, come on I'm all ears. So what's your explanation huh?” I asked. I was very curious to see what he was going to invent.
“Listen. I prefer if we go home.”
“No! Here!Now!” I said steadily.
“Fine,” he said in surrender while he pulled me under a tree.
"So, I have to start from the beginning so that you'll understand better. I want you to know everything. Cassy when I was your age I was different. I wasn't the Tyler you know now. I was an angry person. When I left my father's house and I went to college, I was a lonely person. I hated company. I just wanted to be left alone. While my friends would go and flirt with every girl they met,I couldn't care less. Then I started to play football and I was quite good. I was the captain actually. This changed everything. I became popular, girls would just throw themselves at me. I liked the attention but never went out with any of them. Football, study and work was all my life. I didn't have time for girls. Then one day I went out with my team mates and got drunk. I was down,it was my mum's death anniversary. I drank a lot and lost my virginity to one of the cheerleaders. When I became sober I was disgusted with myself. I didn't even like that girl, yet I had slept with her. Anyway I swore not to get drunk again and that I wouldn't sleep with anyone else unless I have at least a relationship with the person. I kept studying and there was a girl in my class who liked me. She wasn't gorgeous but had a sweet character. We helped each other with home works and studied together. I considered her more like a sister or friend and I knew I could never fall in love with her, maybe because I didn't know how to love. I had so much hate in me that I didn't deserve to love. But she loved me and wanted a relationship. I just kept going out with her but never committed to her or anything. I just left her thinking that we were together. She seemed happy, the first time we had sex she cried. I felt I was making a mistake again, it was just physical pleasure nothing else. I wondered why people made such a fuss on sex, it felt so empty."
I looked at him without saying anything. I felt hurt the more I knew the more I hated what he was telling me.
“I stayed with this girl until my last year of college, then I decided that what I was doing was unfair. She thought we were staying together forever. I never told her that I loved her or anything. I never made plans with her but she thought I loved her. I broke her heart, but at that time I didn't give a damn. Love seemed something very estranged to me. During my last year I had a literature professor who really cared for me. He helped me both in my English studies and with Art. I had told him I liked the subject and that I would like to learn. He gave me a lot of opportunities, lessons, nude classes which he held in his studios and I also worked part time in his Art gallery. A work which helped me to get through my studies. It was there that I met Denise. She was the professor's daughter. She was beautiful and sexy in appearance but a complete disaster inside. She was selfish, spoiled and artificial. She worked as a model. Although I felt attracted to her physically I never wanted to go out with her. I hated her character. The professor encouraged me to go out with her, he liked me a lot and thought that a man like me could change his daughter.
“So you went out with her?” I asked in a broken voice.
“No but one day I was working at the Art gallery and she came in crying saying that the guy that should have gone with her to an important gala dinner wasn't coming. Her father asked me if I would go with her, although reluctantly I went. We had fun, her world was glamorous,I met important people, VIPS and I even met a famous footballer. I was blinded by all this. So when the next time she asked me to go with her again I didn't say no. That night we had sex.“He stopped and looked at me,he knew all this was hurting me.
“I want you to know everything, do you think you could handle the truth?” He asked.
“Continue.“ I just said, although it was killing me, I wanted to know all the truth.
“It was pure
lust, nothing more. She
fulfilled my physical needs but there was no emotion, no love, no relationship. She saw other guys,slept with other guys and told me to do the same. I never done that. She was a bitch, I knew that, yet I stayed with her. Her father was happy and I obtained whatever I wanted, materially speaking.”
I was stunned and very disappointed.
“You mean you had sex with her for benefits?”
“I know it sounds disgusting but that's what I was doing. I wasn't better than her. At that time I thought love didn't exist, that it was a pure fantasy. I had never felt those symptoms everyone talked about. You know heart beating fast, butterflies and so on. Never. I wasn't sad with this situation maybe because I had never really thought much about it. One day the professor asked me if I would consider marrying his daughter. So that I would be his son in law, he told me he would leave me his Art gallery. He had only Denise and she didn't want it. I said I would think about it and wanted to know what Denise thought. I was sure she would have never accepted. But I was wrong, she said yes and she decided a date. She arranged everything. I wasn't even interested,” he paused a moment.
"You were going to marry her for money? Oh my God. What kind of man would ever do that?”I asked disgusted.
“The man I was. I was a monster Cassy. But thanks God I realized in time. One day we were invited to a wedding and when I saw the bride and groom together I felt jealous,they were so in love. I saw it in their eyes, in the way he held her tight, in the way they spoke to each other, they were truly in love. I had nothing. Why was I even considering marriage? That night I didn't sleep. Denise wanted to have sex but I just went out. I didn't want to touch her. Lust,how lust could ever make me happy? I cried and I felt ashamed of myself .What had I become? My mum wouldn't be pleased if she could see me. When I went back I found Denise in bed with a friend of hers. That was the end, I knew she would always sleep with other guys ,she was like that. One man wasn't enough for her and I knew I didn't want a girl like that to be my wife. That night I swore that I would never have sex again in my life.”
I looked at him astonished.
”Never?” I managed to ask.
“Yes,I would have made love, if I ever would have found love. If not then my body had to get used to live without sex. Casey sex is dirty, it's just physical, you could like it for a while but in the long run it's empty. I left Denise that night. I left the city and began to search for work which I found in your school. I would have never imagined that I would have found love as well," he said in a broken voice.
I looked at his eyes, he was crying.
“The first time I came to your class and my eyes met yours,I felt a spark, my heart raced. I couldn't believe it. I couldn't take my eyes off you and it wasn't simple to concentrate on the lesson. I couldn't believe my luck when I saw that it was you the student of the Art class. Destiny was helping me. In a certain way I also thought that I was unlucky because you were my student,it was illegal to love you and certainly you would have never fallen for a teacher, but I was wrong. You felt something for me and each day I hoped it was more than a crush and then there was your boyfriend. How could I compete with a guy your age.? But I wasn't going to give up. I felt that I loved you,love at first sight. You had to be mine even if that meant risking my job. At first I tried not to show it. I kept telling myself that I should wait till the end of the year and then try and ask you out. But I didn't manage very well.”
He paused and smiled at me.“I fell head over heels for you. I was looking at you like that groom looked at his bride, and I started to fantasies about the future, about getting married, having children, your children. Things that I never thought about before. Cassy I love you,I never said that to anyone. I'm not a virgin in sex but I am a virgin in love or at least I was until I met you. I wanted to wait to make love to you because I wanted you to be sure to be in love with me as well. I wanted it to be special. I admit that the fact you're 17 frightened me as well. But I don't care. It's not an age issue. I would risk my life for you as I did when you were going to drown. That day I was terrified to lose you before I even had the chance to make
you mine,” he stopped.
I looked at him there was more I needed to know...
“And Denise? She said she saw you
yesterday,” I said.
“Listen when I took the painting at the Art gallery,which happens to be the professor's Art gallery , I never saw her. I thought I was going there only once to take my work but the professor asked me for help and I couldn't refuse. So I wasn't lying when I said I was going to meetings. In those meetings we discussed which paintings to choose and things like that. Yesterday while I was going home I saw Denise, she was in her car. I didn't even speak to her . Probably she was there on purpose, her father must have told her I was going to be there. I didn't stop to talk to her, I just got in the car and drove away. She called me twice yesterday but I didn't answer and with regards to the messages. I didn't cancel them ,not because I feel something for her but to remind myself of the kind of person I was. Thanks to you my life changed. I'm a better person and I love you Cassy, honestly."
He knelt down and hugged my waist.
“Please don't leave me. I don't want to lose you. I have changed in this past year. I'll make you happy and I'll love you always till the end of my days.”
I stood there in the rain looking at him in disbelief. I didn't know what to think, he had been totally sincere. I knew he wasn't lying. I could see it in his eyes, he had opened his heart to me and I loved him. Yes I did. I knelt near him and hugged him tight.
“I love you too,” I said before he kissed me.
Then we ran to the house. When we arrived there we were freezing .He went in the living room and lit the fire place.
“This will help us to get warm quickly. “ He said. "Then we can take a hot shower. I'll go and get some towels".
I stood in front of the fireplace shivering, then I saw him coming back. He had two towels in his hands. He stopped in front of me and instead of giving it to me, he began to wipe my hair, my face, my neck. He looked into my eyes making me shiver. His eyes were glittering and in them I could see raw naked passion. A passion which this time couldn't be appeased if not fulfilled. He wanted me, I knew that and I wanted him too. All I wanted was to melt into his body to become one with him. He was was so sexy with his hair wet and messy. He then came closer and kissed me lightly before continuing to wipe me dry. His hands now were on my breasts, my shirt was wet.
“Maybe you should take it off,” he said never leaving my eyes. I didn't respond ,I couldn't . I felt so excited. Instead I just put up my arms so that he could take it off for me. He didn't let me wait and pulled the top up above my head. I was in my bra now,he continued to wipe my breasts with the towel. His hands were trembling. I felt my body awakening, that sensual movement on my bra was making effect. I rose my hands to my back and fumbled with my bra clasp. He held his breath, his eyes full of passion. My hands trembled so much that I couldn't open that damned clasp,it was then that I felt his hands on mine. I let go and he opened it immediately. Pulling it gently away. My breasts fell down exposed in front of him. His breath quickened. I blushed while his eyes lingered on my breasts.
“You're beautiful,” he said raising his hand to touch me. As soon as I felt him cupping a breast I thought I was going to die. My breast responded to his touch and got harder, it never happened to me. I had goosebumps all over my body. I shivered so much. He leaned closer to me and captured my mouth with his ,kissing me slowly but passionately. I opened my mouth and his tongue slipped into my mouth tasting while it moved with rhythm. His hands caressed slowly my breasts with circular movements and then he let go of my mouth and traced kisses on my neck, on my shoulder and finally stopping on my breast. I gasped when I felt his warm mouth on one of my nipples. I thought I was going to pass out. My God I never felt so much pleasure in my life. He kept kissing and tasting every part of my chest until I felt him going
down to my navel trailing kisses around my tummy. He stopped for a second and looked at me.
“Are you all right Cassy?” He asked.
“Yes,I'm just a little nervous,” I admitted.
Against All Odds Page 28