Craving Constellations
Page 22
I shook my head and turned Brenna toward the clubhouse. I knew the crazy bitch from somewhere, but I wasn’t gonna waste time trying to figure it out. Grease could take care of it. I had more important shit to do, like making up for lost time with my woman.
My pregnancy went really well. I didn’t have any of the problems with this baby that I’d had with the twins. My blood pressure stayed steady, my hips didn’t ache, and my feet didn’t swell. The doctors told me it was the difference between carrying twins and a single baby, but I thought it was Dragon.
He still went on runs, and when he did, Casper stayed with us. Tony was no longer a threat, but Dragon didn’t want us home alone for an entirely new reason. I didn’t know if it was the baby’s uneasy beginning, our history with the twins, or just Dragon’s overprotectiveness, but he wouldn’t leave until he knew someone was going to be around the house. It drove Slider crazy, but I loved it. I loved that he was taking care of us. I never felt stifled or annoyed. I felt protected, cherished.
We’d wanted to find out the sex. I was too anxious to wait, but every ultrasound had been a bust. I’d been really annoyed. I’d wanted to start planning early, but Dragon just laughed when we never got a clear indication either way. I thought he was just relieved that the baby was healthy. We never fought about things even though I knew half the time I was being a total bitch. Dragon would just shake his head at me like I was crazy and go on doing whatever he was doing at the time.
It wasn’t until I decided I would try to have the baby naturally, rather than a C-section, that Dragon put his foot down. He’d sat with me during the consultation when the doctor gave us all of the worst-case scenarios, and he was pissed as hell that I was willing to take any chances. The fight went on for weeks, but it finally came to a head when I was about seven months along.
“Brenna, there is no fuckin’ way that I’m gonna let you put yourself in danger just because you wanna commune with motherfuckin’ nature or whatever the hell it is you got in your head,” he told me one night as we were lying in bed.
“They can get the baby out in like sixty seconds if something goes wrong. The chances of anything happening are slim. Baby, seriously, they know what they’re doing.” I laid my head on his chest and traced my finger over where he’d gone in and had Trix’s star enlarged on his Orion’s Belt tattoo.
“They give you all of these things they say could go wrong, make you sign a fuckin’ paper that says you’re not gonna sue them, and you don’t see nothin’ wrong with that?” He shook his head. “You’re not doin’ it, baby. You’re havin’ a fuckin’ C-section, like they advised you to fuckin’ do. Not gonna lose you. End of story.”
And that was that. I’d been willing to give him the peace of mind that he needed. It wasn’t like I’d been looking forward to hours of labor anyway. I’d just have to let my fears of another C-section go.
So, there I was, lying in an operating room, surrounded by doctors and nurses, waiting for them to cut me open and get our child out. I didn’t sleep last night because I was too anxious, but when we got out of bed this morning, I was completely calm. I could do this.
My arms were strapped to the table by my head, and it was scary, but Dragon was there holding my hand. His face was covered with a surgical mask, and he was dressed in scrubs, the sleeves so tight around his chest and biceps that he looked like a stripper. All he needed was a stethoscope and a boom box. The thought made me smile.
“How you doin’, Little Mama?” he asked me quietly, his face close to mine.
The doctors were speaking around us, but it felt like we were in our own little world.
“I’m okay. I’m ready for this to be over,” I whispered back as I felt them tugging on my torso. I didn’t know if they had already cut me, and I was trying not to pay attention to what they were doing on the other side of the little curtain.
“You’re doin’ so good, baby.” He brushed the curls that had escaped my ponytail out of my face. “It’s almost ov—”
His words were cut off by the screaming of an infant, and he immediately raised his head over the curtain.
“Hey, Daddy, you want to let Mom know what she’s got?” my doctor asked with a smile in her voice.
I looked around, trying to get a glimpse of anything, when Dragon’s face leaned back down over mine.
“Thank God. Another fuckin’ dick in the house. Gettin’ tired of all those fuckin’ Barbies,” he told me, a huge grin on his face. “We got a boy, Mama.”
The doctors were rushing around us, and tears were running down the sides of my face as a little wrapped bundle was set in Dragon’s arms. He was no longer crying. He was asleep. I could barely see his face, and the doctors were still working on me on the other side of the curtain, but I was completely content in this moment.
“You did good, baby,” Dragon told me as he pushed down his mask, a tender look in his eyes. “Now, give your man a kiss.”
Holy cow, I don’t even know where to start.
To my girlies—Mama did it! But, as excited as I am right now, nothing will compare to the two of you. You are my biggest accomplishments, and no matter where life takes us from here, you always will be. My cup runneth over. I love you to the moon and back.
Mom and Dad—I love you. Thank you for keeping me sane, providing me with coffee, watching the girlies, and loving me. You guys are my biggest cheerleaders, and there is no way I could have accomplished all I have in the last year if it weren’t for you.
To my sisters—You guys are the best friends a girl could ever ask for. Thank you for being so excited for me every time I couldn’t wait to call you with every single detail of this writing process. You’ve been with me during every exciting step. Let’s drink wine and celebrate. I think we’ve earned it.
To my brothers—You’ll never read this, but I love you, and I could never leave you out.
To Genelle and Becky—You two were my first sounding board and the very first people to read my work. I can’t ever repay you for that. Without your input, I don’t know how far I would have made it. You kept me going and built me up. I love you, girls, and I’m so happy to have you as friends.
Madeline—Anything I say to you in here will have you rolling your eyes. Don’t think I don’t see you. You act like you didn’t do anything big, but I can’t even explain how much you’ve helped me. You answered my questions, you didn’t bullshit me, and you introduced me to an entire writing community that I didn’t even know was there. Thank you.
To the girls in ANGTFD—Thank you for listening to me complain and worry and bubble over with excitement. I didn’t even know I needed you guys until I met you and now I can’t imagine going through this without you.
Ana—You know what you did. I think I love you. Thank you.
Lb and Lisa—Thank you for reminding me of what’s real and what isn’t.
Madison—Thank you for letting me bug you at all hours of the night, answering question after question, and fixing my atrocious tenses. This book would not be what it is without you.
Jovana—You have an eagle eye. I’m so glad I sent my baby to you. Thank you for your help.
Scandal the Superblogger—Did you know that I dreamed of having my book reviewed on your blog? I almost passed out when you agreed to do my blog tour. You fulfilled a dream. I can’t even begin to thank you enough.
My Betas—I loved having you yell at me. No, really, that was my favorite part. If you’re not feeling anything, then I’m not doing my job. Thank you for your feedback!
And to the bloggers who decided to take a chance on an unknown author—“Did you ever know that you’re my hero?” That’s right, I’m singing. “You are the wind beneath my wings.”
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