Chapter Thirty-Three
I called Jesse the next morning before we both left for work to make sure he was okay. He sounded alright and I convinced myself he was. I didn’t bother asking, instead I told him he was coming over for dinner at my house that night and he didn’t argue.
When I got to work, I was glad to see Matt was the only one at the shop. He looked happy to see me too and I tried not to look too sullen. I was certain Matt had had enough of my drama this summer, although I figured I was actually doing him a favor since he was getting excellent practice for his future career.
“Hey, Matt,” I said as I walked past him to put my bag away.
“How was your weekend?”
I stopped for a moment, looking around the store. It was times like these I was glad I worked in a flower shop. No matter what mood I was in, I always felt better surrounded by flowers.
“It was fine,” I answered.
“You don’t seem fine.”
“I know I’ve said this before, but you’re going to make a great therapist.”
“Well, that’s a given. We already know that. Now, what’s going on?”
“You don’t want to hear more of my drama.”
“Actually, I do.”
I sighed and sat down on a stool behind the counter.
“Jesse’s mom left.”
“Seriously?” he asked and I could see the disbelief all over his face.
“Turns out she only came back to see if Jesse had any money from his dad’s estate he could pass her way. When she realized he didn’t, she took off.”
I heard him breathe in deeply and then he met his eyes with mine.
“Damn. Talk about harsh. What the hell else is gonna happen to him?”
“I know. It’s so messed up.”
“How is he?” Matt asked and it seemed as if he was genuinely concerned about Jesse.
“He was pretty shattered last night.”
“Understandably so. Do you think he’ll come out of it okay?”
“I think so,” I mumbled. “I hope so, anyway.”
It grew quiet for a moment, then he looked at me again.
“And how are you holding up?”
“I just hate seeing him going through all of this. He doesn’t deserve any of this.”
“No, he doesn’t,” Matt said softly and then paused for a moment. “I’m sorry for trying to put a positive spin on her arrival. I was way off. You were dead on.”
“It doesn’t matter now. You were just trying to look on the bright side of things because that’s the type of person you are. I, on the other hand, am a glass half empty kind of girl.”
“I don’t think that’s true,” he said, even though we both knew it was.
“Where’s your mom?” I asked, changing the subject.
“In Oklahoma,” he chuckled and I knew there was a story behind the laugh.
“Oklahoma? When did this happen?”
“When Mark decided it was okay to drive around with pot on the passenger seat of the car.”
“What?” I exclaimed and couldn’t stifle my laughter.
“My brilliant older brother got pulled over for speeding and the cop happened to notice the bag of weed sitting beside him.”
“Your poor mom,” I said, shaking my head.
“Maybe she’ll finally realize Mark’s not just a free spirit, but a free loader ,” he said and we both started laughing at his joke. “That’s doubtful though.”
“When will she be back?”
“She says tomorrow, but who knows. So, until then, we’re runnin’ the show. Now get to work. There are flower arrangements that need to be made,” he ordered in a stern voice that reminded me of a drill sergeant. “Idle hands are the devil’s workshop.”
“Gimme a break,” I laughed, swatting him on the arm as I grabbed a vase and got to work.
****
The day was slow and Matt and I struggled to find stuff to keep us busy. At one point, we sat in front of the computer watching You Tube videos that Matt insisted were hilarious. I’d yet to crack a smile, but I’d rolled my eyes plenty of times though.
“Are you made of stone or something?” he finally said. He’d just returned from the bathroom after making me sit through one more video, which didn’t make me laugh either.
“Of course I’m not made of stone. Why would you say that?”
“These videos are hilarious and you haven’t laughed once.”
“Because they’re not funny.”
“They’re totally funny.”
“Sorry to break it to you, but they’re not.”
“You just don’t have a sense of humor.”
“Yes, I do. I just reserve my laughter for things that are actually funny. Perhaps you’re the one without a sense of humor.”
“Is that a challenge?” he grinned.
“What are you talking about?”
“You’re questioning my sense of humor. It’s a well-known fact that I’m hilarious and I know I can make you laugh.”
“You’re gonna make me laugh?”
“I will. You’ll see,” he said and then closed the screen on the computer and we decided to get back to work.
“Can you wash these off for me?” he asked a while later, handing me a pair of shears.
I took the shears and walked over to the sink. I turned on the faucet and screamed as water started shooting out at me. As I scrambled to turn it off, I saw the water was coming from the sprayer at the side of the sink. I was gasping from the cold water that soaked my shirt.
“What the hell is wrong with this thing?” I shouted as I looked at the faucet.
I heard Matt’s bellowing laughter just as I saw what the problem was: a piece of scotch tape holding the sprayer down. I whipped around to see him doubled over in amusement.
“You did this? You think this is funny?” I exclaimed.
“You should’ve seen the look on your face!” I had a hard time understanding Matt through the laughter. “That was priceless. I wish I’d been recording this!”
“So, this is your idea of a joke?”
“I told you I’d make you laugh.”
“Am I laughing?” I asked, trying to keep my mouth pressed into a firm line, but I was finding it difficult. Matt’s laughter was contagious and I looked over at myself in the mirror. I did look pretty pathetic with my shirt soaking wet. I grinned to myself and then while he was preoccupied in hysterics, I grabbed the sprayer, aimed it at him, and turned on the faucet.
“What are you doing?” he yelled out as the water hit him, but I didn’t stop. He barreled towards me and it was my turn to laugh. He tried grabbing the sprayer from me and soon we were engaged in a tug of war as the water rained down on both of us. When Matt finally wrestled it away from me and rushed over to shut off the water we were both soaked and unable to control our laughter.
“I made you laugh,” he managed to get out.
“I think I might pee my pants though,” I panted as I hunched over, my stomach hurting from laughing so hard.
“I never knew working in a flower shop could be so much fun,” a voice said and Matt and I both turned our heads to the counter to see Jesse standing there.
“Jesse,” I said, straightening myself up, trying to catch my breath as I regained control. I ran a hand through my damp hair and Matt straightened his crumpled shirt. Jesse was grinning at me and I was afraid this would be one of his jealous incidents, but he was looking at me in a way I hadn’t seen before, as if he were contemplating something. “What are you doing here?” I asked.
“I came by to see if you wanted to grab lunch with me?”
“Yeah, I would,” I said, smiling over to him.
“So, is this little water war a typical occurrence?” he said, looking between Matt and I.
“No,” I said quickly. “Matt thought it would be funny to play a prank on me. He taped the sprayer down so when I turned on the sink, it shot right at me. I had to get him back.”
; “I only did it because Riley doesn’t seem to ever laugh. I told her I’d make her laugh and I did,” Matt piped in and I wondered if he was uncomfortable. I’d never told Jesse about him trying to kiss me at the concert, but Matt didn’t know that.
“Correction. I do laugh, but only at funny things, and that was funny,” I said, turning to grin at Matt. “I’ll be back in a half hour, okay?”
“Fine. Go ahead and leave me to pick up all this mess,” he mocked.
“I will. You’re the one that started it. See ya in a bit,” I said, running into the backroom to grab my purse before returning to the front and linking arms with Jesse. “Ready to go?”
“Yeah. See ya later, Matt,” he called as we walked out of the shop. “You look like a drowned rat,” he grinned as he held the Jeep door open. “But, a very cute, drowned rat.” He shut the door and then walked around the front of the Jeep before getting in the driver’s seat.
“You’re not mad…about Matt and me goofing around, are you?”
“No,” he said, taking my hand. “You looked like you were having fun. It was good to hear you laugh.”
I was relieved because even though he’d said he wasn’t jealous when Matt and I went to the concert, I worried that was a one shot deal.
“I’m surprised you came by. You’re usually too busy in the middle of the day.”
“Glenn’s at the shop and I wanted to spend some time with you.”
“I like that idea,” I said, squeezing his hand.
“A&W okay?” he asked and I nodded.
“Of course,” I answered and he made the turn onto the highway.
“So, Glenn’s running the shop full time, now?” I asked as we drove.
“Pretty much.”
“What about the gun range?”
“He says he can do both. I guess he’ll appoint a manager at the shop or something. He’ll figure it out. I’m just glad it’s not going to be my problem anymore.”
I hesitated for a moment as we drove, but decided to finally ask him about Marlene.
“Have you heard anything from your mom?”
“No,” he said flatly.
“Are you okay?” I asked softly.
“I’m fine,” he said briskly. “I just don’t wanna talk about the shop or my mom, okay? I just want to spend some time with you.”
“Okay. We can do that,” I said as he pulled me to him, kissing me on the cheek before he turned into the parking lot.
Chapter Thirty-Four
When I got in the car after work a week later, I saw the check engine light was on. Instead of going home, I decided to swing by Jesse’s shop so he could take a look at it. I knew it was probably nothing, but I wanted to double check, plus it gave me an excuse to see him.
Since Marlene left, Jesse seemed to be dealing with it the best he could. He didn’t want to talk about it though and I respected that, although I wondered how healthy it was. There were only a few more weeks to go though and then we’d be in college and things would stabilize. I told myself that anyway. I just hoped it was true.
I pulled into the parking lot of the shop and when I walked inside, I was taken aback at the sight of Glenn standing behind the counter. I hadn’t seen Glenn since the accident and I was suddenly tongue-tied. I didn’t know what to say to him. Even before the accident, I didn’t know Glenn very well, but now it just seemed weird and awkward.
“Hi, Riley,” he said when he saw me and I thought he seemed as nervous as I was.
“Hi, Mr. Baylor,” I said and hesitated towards the counter. “How are you feeling?” I asked, saying the only thing I could think of.
“I’m on the mend.”
“I’m glad you’re alright,” I said softly and I thought I saw him grimace, no doubt thinking back to the accident and his brother’s death.
“What can I do for you?” he said and I knew our exchange of pleasantries was over.
“My check engine light came on. I wanted Jesse to take a look at it.”
“He’s right in the middle of working on some brake pads, but I can check it out for you,” he said, reaching under the counter and pulling out a small gage. “Ya know, you’re gonna have to learn a thing or two about cars once Jesse’s gone,” he said with a gentle laugh.
“What do you mean?” I asked, the confusion evident on my face.
“When he leaves for boot camp next week,” Glenn said matter-of-factly and I swear I felt my heart stop beating at that moment.
“What are you talking about?” I said, my voice slow and worried.
The look on Glenn’s face couldn’t be masked. His mouth opened and closed a few times as if he was trying to find his voice.
“I thought you knew,” he said in a low whisper. “I thought he would’ve told you.”
“What’s going on?” I exclaimed, the panic surfacing in my voice.
“Riley…I’m sorry,” he stuttered as the side door opened and Jesse appeared from the garage.
“Glenn, can you order…” he began, his voice trailing off when he noticed me standing there. “Hey, Riley.” His voice was normal, with no illusion to the secret he’d been keeping from me.
“What’s going on, Jesse?” I said, as my voice began to tremble. Jesse looked between his uncle and me and it was obvious by the expression on his face that his secret was out.
“I’m sorry, Jess. I thought you’d told her,” Glenn interjected.
“Riley,” Jesse said anxiously, crossing the room quickly until he stood in front of me. “I was gonna tell you.” He took my hand, but I ripped it away.
“Don’t talk to me. Don’t you say one word to me,” I said calmly as I tried to keep the rage and hurt at bay as I stormed out of the office, got into my car, and sped away.
My phone started ringing almost the instant I got in the car. It was Jesse calling, but I ignored it and focused on the road, wiping the tears from my eyes that blurred my vision so badly I was having a hard time seeing the road.
When I got home, I was grateful my mom was at work. My grandmother was on the couch watching her soap opera. She was so engrossed in it, it wasn’t hard to hide my distress. I quickly said hello and headed up to my room. I started pacing the hard wood floor as I tried to process what I had just learned. Glenn had said Jesse was leaving next week. I was racking my brain trying to figure out what the hell was going on. He wasn’t leaving. He wasn’t joining the military. We were leaving for K-State in a few weeks…together. This could not be happening. I made my way over to the window and stared out at the garden in the back as the tears continued to fall from my eyes. I could feel Jesse’s arms around me like the morning after his father died. His world had fallen apart that day and it appeared it was now my turn.
My head whipped around when I heard the door push open quickly and Jesse stood in the doorway, his hands still covered in grease as if he’d gotten in his car almost immediately after I’d left.
“I can’t talk to you right now,” I spat at him, but he ignored me, stepping inside and shutting the door behind him, completely disregarding my mother’s rule of keeping it open when I had a boy in the room.
“You have to talk to me.”
“I don’t because apparently we don’t talk to each other anymore. We just make life altering decisions without discussing it with each other. That’s how it appears to be now,” I said, wiping my face dry with the back of my hand.
“I was gonna tell you, I swear,” he said, stepping towards me, but then stopped a few feet away when he saw my icy stare.
“When? The morning you left?” I fumed at him sarcastically.
“No. I…I just…there hasn’t been…there hasn’t been the right time,” he stammered. “But, I was gonna tell you.”
“Just like you told me you were joining? How the hell could you do this to me?”
“Riley, let me explain…” he said, but I cut him off.
“When did this happen? Have you already signed up? Is this a done deal?” I shouted.
; “Please, calm down,” he said, finally closing the gap between us and taking my hand. I wanted to yank it back, but he held it tightly. “Would you let me explain everything?’
His voice was low and calm. I wanted to run away, but the way he looked at me so pleadingly, I relented and he led me over to the bed. We sat side by side and I waited for him to begin. It took him a few moments, but he eventually started talking.
“I’ve been thinking about joining the Marines for a while now. When my dad died, I thought I could make everything work, but Riley,” he said, taking my hand. “I can’t. I can’t just go off to K-State like everything’s okay when it’s not.”
“But it will be,” I interrupted. “You’ll see. Just give it a chance. We’ll get to Manhattan and we’ll be able to put this summer behind us.”
“I’ll never be able to put this summer behind me,” he said, swallowing hard and I realized how insensitive I’d sounded.
“But it’ll be different. The change of scenery will be good and we can move forward.”
“It’s not that simple anymore. Things have changed. I can’t pay the tuition. Dad was gonna pay for it, but now…well, you know how everything’s changed. The Marines will give me a chance to do something with my life and I can earn money to go to college when I’m done.”
“We could stay here and go to the community college while you worked,” I interjected, but he turned and looked at me with a serious face.
“Don’t be ridiculous. I’m not gonna hold you back. I won’t let you ruin your life for me.”
“I wouldn’t be ruining my life…”
“Just stop, Riley,” he said, cutting me off. “It’s done. I need this. I need to get away from here for a while. I need to make something of myself.”
“You mean, you need to get away from me,” I choked out.
“No. That’s not it at all. I love you,” he said, but I had a hard time hearing his words over all the profanities swimming around inside my head.
“Why didn’t you talk to me about this?” I said, a lump forming in my throat as I realized this situation didn’t appear to be negotiable.
Far From Home Page 23