When The Right Door Opens

by Catherine Micqu

  “What happened to that poor man? I am sure you don't get fingerprints on your face by accident.”

  “I don't want to talk about that. It's his own business.”

  “He got raped. He's a hustler.” Kai blurted out from behind Karen. She spun around and stared at Kai and then back at Sebastian.

  “You take a whore into your house? And kiss him? Are you out of your mind? I didn't raise you like that.”

  “You're right. You didn't raise me like that. You raised me to help people in need, to not judge and to be inviting and friendly to everyone. I can't help the feelings that I have for Jamie and please, let's not make this something it's not. I like him, but that doesn't mean I have to marry him. He didn't promise anything and I didn't promise anything either. He is my roommate and what you just witnessed was our very first kiss. Where's the harm in that? I am divorced and I haven't been with a man since Rudy...”

  “... that's because you are hiding in this house like a recluse. This is not only about you and him – James, right? He has a daughter. Have you looked into her eyes? She is lost and forced to act like a grown-up, while she should be a child for a little longer.”

  “Of course I know that.”

  “Then you also know that she wants her father to be happy and she has so many hopes in you and this thing you have with her father. She is going to be devastated when you two decide that it doesn't work out. You are her Richard Gere. You are her Edward Lewis.”

  “What are you talking about now? Who am I supposed to be?”

  “Pretty Woman? Richard Gere is the knight in shining armor, who saves the whore and offers her a better life.”

  “He doesn't know that I'm rich...”

  “... for God's sake, Sebastian. It's not about the money, it's about feelings. Don't play with their feelings.”

  “I have no intention to.”

  “Good. Because I can still give you a real spanking if you hurt that sweet girl.” Karen took off her coat and handed it to Kai. He rolled his eyes, but he also knew better than to argue. His mother was on a roll that day. Sebastian kissed his mother's cheek and hugged her tightly.

  “Are you staying for dinner?” Sebastian asked once he let go of his mom.

  “Of course. It smells delicious and I want to know more about James and lovely Agnes.”

  ****

  “What did we miss?” Agnes came back into the kitchen and took a seat next to Kai.

  “Nothing major, except maybe, that Sebastian got a real lecture from our mom.” Kai snickered.

  “Did not!”

  “Oh yes.” Agnes grinned at Kai's response, but got serious again, when her father helped setting the table.

  “Agnes, could you please help? It's not because we aren't alone anymore, that you can skip your tasks.”

  “Yes dad.” she got up and helped, while Karen nodded approvingly. At least he raised his child the right way.

  “Please, Sebastian sit down, I'll bring the rest.” Jamie urged Sebastian to sit down and he brought their dinner to the table. Nobody really talked. Curiousness reigned around the table, but the many questions remained unspoken.

  “So, Sebastian, what about that cane? Have you been dancing again?”

  “Mom, please not now.”

  “Yes now. Honey, I only want the best for you.”

  “I know, but what damage is done, is done and hearing your complaints doesn't help in the least, so please, let it drop. And that counts for you too, Kai.” Sebastian pointed at his twin with his loaded fork. Kai raised his hands in surrender, but his look told his brother more than words.

  Dinner was as delicious as it had smelled and seeing family Martin engage in easy banter and telling jokes made Jamie long for his own family. It had been a while since he had tried to get in contact with his parents. Some times he missed them. Some times, he missed a mother's hug and a father's pat on the back. It has been so long since he had someone in his life, who was there for him and who he could trust completely. Jamie looked at Agnes, she was teasing Kai about something that had happened that afternoon. Jamie didn't hear the words, lost in his thoughts, but he saw the look on his daughter's face. She liked this too. Being part of something, being part of – a family.

  ~~Chapter 7~~

  At night, Jamie and Agnes cuddled close together again. The furniture would arrive the next day, but until then, Jamie enjoyed his baby-girl in his arms.

  “I had fun today. I want to be part of this family.” Agnes yawned and before Jamie found it in him to reply to her, she was already asleep. For the first time, he realized, that this was not only about him. This was about Agnes too. Everything he did, every step he took had consequences for himself and his daughter.

  “I love you princess. I will never hurt you again. I promise that. One day, we will have this too. A family.” Agnes stirred in her sleep, but she smiled. Jamie was close to tears. That night, sleep didn't come easily. Too many thoughts kept him awake.

  The next morning, the alarm rang a little earlier than usual. Agnes got up and went to the bathroom of her future room, while Jamie walked a little down the hall to the bathroom he shared with Sebastian. Jamie opened the door and froze in his tracks. The sounds and moans coming from behind the shower curtain didn't leave anything to the imagination. Jamie knew he should turn around and leave, but his feet wouldn't move. In the fogged mirror, he suddenly saw a glimpse of Sebastian's skin. His ass, was what he saw and the elbow that moved in and out of sight.

  Jamie felt his cock rock hard in his boxers and his hand involuntarily stroked himself through the clothes. It felt so good and so wrong at the same time. He could hear the deep guttural sounds coming through to him and heightening his own arousal. Faster and faster the elbow in the mirror moved, faster and louder the moans came from behind the curtain, faster and faster Jamie stroked himself, until he bit his lip hard and came all over his hand, his knees buckled and he held on to the sink to catch his breath. Simultaneously, Sebastian moaned and panted, when his orgasm washed over him.

  Only a minute later, the water in the shower stopped running, the curtain was pulled to the side and Sebastian stood in shock, seeing Jamie. Sebastian was not fully flaccid yet and his body was flushed, his skin glistened with the drops of water slowly running trails down his lean body. Jamie couldn't tear his eyes away from the delicious naked man.

  “Would you hand me my towel?” Sebastian's voice was hoarse, but strong and when Jamie looked up, Sebastian had no intention to look away or hide away in embarrassment. Jamie didn't trust his voice and looked around the bathroom to see the mentioned towel. With shaky fingers, he held it out to Sebastian, not able to look at him anymore.

  “The shower's free and there's some hot water left. I'm going to make us breakfast.” Jamie hadn't even processed what had happened, all he could do was nod dumbly and in the next moment he was alone in the humid bathroom, surrounded with the lingering scent of Sebastian.

  Jamie shed his dirty underwear and his sleeping-shirt and stepped into the shower. As the water rand down his body and he watched it vanish in the drain, he suddenly felt very self-aware. Mere moments ago, he had watched Sebastian jerk off and he had, if only secretly, joined him. It was hot, but way out of character for him. Sebastian's face came back to his mind, when he had pushed the curtain away and Jamie smiled. Sebastian was gorgeous, he longed to run his fingers over that smooth milky skin, touch the rippled abs...

  Jamie washed himself with Sebastian's soap and shampoo and sniffed at it, conjuring the feeling, of Sebastian's body against him up again. He felt refreshed and happy when he started toweling his body off. A look in the mirror made him smile too. His eye was more or less returning to normal, his bump on his forehead was yellow and not swollen anymore. The fingerprints on his jaw were an angry shade of green, but almost unnoticeable through his dark stubble. If you didn't know they were there, people would maybe not see what he wanted to hide. Or maybe it was simply Jamie, who started to get used to see his reflection
in the mirror.

  Jamie emerged from the bathroom and he could already smell the scent of fresh coffee. Agnes was already dressed and ready for breakfast and only minutes later, Jamie was dressed in jeans and a simple button-down shirt too. He took his socks and boots in his hand and walked downstairs to the kitchen, where Agnes and Sebastian were already waiting for him. Jamie couldn't help it, but his thoughts went back to naked Sebastian. He smiled and took a seat, while Agnes purred coffee for them all and they began to eat scrambled eggs and toast. Sebastian and Jamie stole secretive glances at each other, whenever they thought Agnes wasn't looking and their bare feet met under the table to play footsie.

  “I made a decision” Agnes announced, surprising the men. “I want to change school. I talked to Kai about it and he said that there is a really good school nearby. I don't want to go back and be reminded of the past. I want this to be new. All of it.” She took her mug and sipped on it, waiting for her father's reaction.

  “Are you sure?” Jamie asked and Agnes nodded decisively. “Let me look into it, okay. I understand where you are coming from and you are right to want this, but changing schools during a school year is never easy. I have to talk to the headmasters of both schools first.”

  “I think we need to go now. Depending on the traffic, we will be just on time.” Sebastian said and got up to clean the table. Agnes and Jamie looked at each other puzzled.

  “We? Why we?”

  “I'm coming with you.” Sebastian said as a matter of fact and both McCarricks looked at each and shrugged.

  “Do you have everything?” Jamie asked while tying his bootlace. “Yes!” Agnes sighed. “Do you have your phone? Books? Lunch-money?”

  “Yes, yes and yes. This isn't my first day at school, you know?”

  Jamie grinned from his sitting position on the stairs. “I know.”

  “Good.” Agnes huffed and put her hands on her hips, a move she had seen on Karen. Agnes pulled her thick scarf tighter and Jamie slipped into a black leather jacket Agnes had bought him the previous day on her shopping spree with Kai. Jamie draped a light gray scarf around his neck and looked at his reflection in the mirror hanging in the corridor. He rearranged a few strands of his hair, until it was the way he wanted to have it and he saw Agnes rolling her eyes behind him.

  “You look good.”

  “You sure do.” Sebastian stood on the last step of the stairs and ogled Jamie with a smile. Jamie blushed, but smiled back at Sebastian. Their eyes locked and Jamie felt the world around him fall out of focus again. He felt drawn towards Sebastian.

  “Are you ready, dad? We need to go!” Agnes hurried out of the door, leaving the spell between Sebastian and Jamie broken once again.

  ****

  Jamie was impressed when he saw Sebastian's car. He had no idea what he had been expecting, but it wasn't a matte black Audi RS7. The car was new and a beauty and definitely upscale. Sebastian held out the keys to Jamie and he gulped when he got behind the wheel. His hand slid back and forth over the leather steering wheel, a boyish smile was on his lips. Jamie started the car and carefully pulled out of the driveway.

  “Oh My God. This car is better than sex.” Jamie laughed excitedly, when he accelerated on the highway.

  “Then you clearly don't know good sex.” Sebastian deadpanned dryly and Agnes gasped in mock-shock.

  “Helloho! Child on board!”

  “Oh come on. Don't be such a prude all of a sudden.” Jamie teased his girl and they laughed. He winked at her in the rear view mirror and she grinned. It was nice to see her father happy and carefree for once. She turned her head a little and observed Sebastian. Sebastian couldn't tear his eyes away from Jamie. He licked his lips seductively and Agnes asked herself if this was an unconscious tick. His eyes were smiling and his lips were smiling too. Agnes liked to see Sebastian look at her father like that. It was a loving look. A look full of admiration.

  Once off the highway, Jamie suddenly slowed down considerably. The streets where seamed with piles of snow and Jamie drove into a long street with nice looking middle-class houses, he slowed down even more. And then he stopped.

  The fun he had from driving a fast car was completely gone. There was no smile on his face anymore, only a frown. Jamie looked at a house across the street with intent. A man was walking down the steps to his mailbox. His hair was thin and gray and his belly was round under his khaki colored sweater. He pulled his brown cardigan closer, to prevent the cold from chilling him on his way to get the mail.

  “Why are you stopping?” Agnes asked. Jamie swiped away a tear that had escaped his eyes, while he had watched the old man. He pointed at the man and tried finding his voice.

  “That man... He is your grand-father. It's my dad.” The moment Sebastian's comforting hand landed on Jamie's shoulder, he lost his battle against his tears and started to cry. He hadn't known how much he missed his parents, until he saw Sebastian with his family. He hadn't realized how much he missed his own father, until he saw him just now.

  Agnes reacted on a whim and didn't miss a beat. She got out of the car and walked across the street, straight into the direction of her grand-father.

  Jamie was shocked, he hadn't planned on getting out of the car.

  “Agnes! Wait!” he called after her, but she didn't turn back.

  “I'm sorry to disturb you, but are you Mister McCarrick?” the man was surprised to see the young woman addressing him, but nodded.

  “Do you have a son? James?” The man's eyes filled with tears and he nodded again. “I'm Agnes.” she didn't need to say more. The man took her into her arms and hugged her tightly. He sobbed into her shoulder and mumbled words of being sorry and Agnes patted his back emphatically. She pulled away from the man and he held her at arm’s length.

  “Where is Jamie? Is he alive? Is he well?” the man cleared his throat to strengthen his voice.

  Agnes turned and pointed at Jamie, who stood by the car. Sebastian was close, but not touching. She motioned to the men to come over and Jamie sought help in Sebastian's eyes.

  “I haven't seen him in thirteen years. He has no idea who I am and I am sure my mom will not even allow us into the house.”

  “You have to try. If you don't try you'll never know what could have happened.” Jamie nodded and took a deep breath.

  “Could you stay close? I know, I ask a lot, but...”

  “Of course. Of course, Jamie. I'm here. You're safe. No matter what happens.” Sebastian squeezed Jamie's shoulder and pushed him to go and meet his father for the first time in over a decade. When Jamie had last seen his father, when he left, he was only a boy, now he came back and he was a man.

  The old man straightened up and watched tensely as his son crossed the road. Jamie breathed heavily. The man walked the few last steps towards Jamie and against his expectations, Jamie found himself being hugged tightly.

  “I missed you so much. I am so sorry James. So so sorry.” Jamie didn't even try to conceal his own tears. He was finally in his father's arms. Arms he had missed for such a long time. His father still smelled the same and his voice was still soothing. He ran his hand over Jamie's head, just like he had done when Jamie was a kid and had hurt himself. Jamie clutched tightly at his father. Together, they sobbed in each other’s arms and mourned the many missed opportunities they could never make up for.

  Sebastian sniffled behind them and Agnes had her face burrowed in his chest. At first, Sebastian had hesitated, but then he had taken the girl in his arms. It was nice that she trusted him and that she shared this moment with him. He witnessed a real family reunion. And suddenly he knew, that he wanted these two, Jamie and Agnes, to be part of his own family. Sebastian pulled Agnes even tighter against himself. Jamie was safe with him, he had told him so, more than once. Agnes was safe with him too and he would do everything in his power to protect them. From everything evil. Always.

  Many tears flowed on that pavement in the suburb of Gabefield, but not a single one of them was a sad tear.<
br />
  ****

  “Come in. Please. I'll make us a cup of tea or coffee. Come. Come in.” Brady McCarrick invited Jamie, Agnes and Sebastian in. Forgotten was the fact that they were on the way to get Agnes to school.

  “What about mom?” Jamie asked hesitantly, stalling. His father lowered his head and shook it slowly.

  “She... I am so sorry, son. I didn't know how to reach you.” Jamie froze. Sebastian put his reassuring hand on Jamie's shoulder again, but he shrugged it off. Too much human contact would make him cry again and he didn't want to cry. Not now. Not here.

  Ugly words had been spoken, when he was young. Some milder insults from his mom were that he was a whiny faggot who would not be able to survive with a bastard child like Agnes. And now she – his mother, was gone. Dead.

  Jamie suddenly felt an incredible void inside of him. No matter how cruel she had been from time to time, she had been his mother and he had loved her. He had missed her. He hadn't even had the opportunity to say good-bye. His mother had died and he hadn't known. He hadn't been there. Not at her deathbed, not at her funeral. Jamie started to shake and before he even knew that he was crying and mourning the loss of his mother, the tears were already soaking his cheeks again. He buried his face in his hands and when his hands fell away from his face, his eyes wouldn't open, it stayed black and his knees gave out under him.

  Agnes, screamed, terrified and Brady took her to the side, while Sebastian heaved Jamie inside the house once again. Sebastian was ushered to the living room, where just the second he wanted to put Jamie down he came to his senses again.

  “Hey there, sleeping beauty.” Sebastian said tenderly and helped Jamie sit. He kissed Jamie tenderly on the forehead.

  “If this is too much for you, tell me and I'll drive us home. Okay?”

  Jamie looked around himself. Not much had changed from his memories. The TV was new, a large flat screen, but the furniture was still the same. The smell was the same too.