Twisting Fate

by Charisse Reid

  I yank it out of his hand and open it with both hands. What I see when I open it hurts far worse than anything I've endured in my life to this date, and probably ever will. Kinzleigh and Preston made the story on the front page of the paper. They are dressed formally and looking into each other's eyes with smiles on their faces. The headline of the paper reads, The newest and youngest most eligible bachelor announces engagement.

  I feel like I'm bleeding internally. I knew they were together, but I didn't know they were that serious. Why am I surprised? I know he'd do anything to get her for himself. My head is pounding from the anger that is making my blood boil. I have to watch her slipping from my fingers and it's killing me. She may be engaged, but she isn't married yet. I came here knowing I'd have to fight for her and that's what I'm going to do. Over my dead body will I watch her marry another man and take my kid. If he wants her, he can pry her from my cold, dead fingers.

  "Where is she Ryland?" I continue to stare at the woman I love, letting myself get angry. The best wars are fought when they are backed with emotion. When you allow personal ties to drive you, you fight harder and endure more than you normally would be able to. You find a strength inside that you didn't know you had. It's no different than a ballplayer playing for a teammate that lost their life. There is an underlying motive that empowers you.

  "I don't know where she is." Wrong answer.

  I look up and I am more serious than I have ever been about anything in my entire life. "Find her, now." I bark out the order through gritted teeth. I’ll beat it out of the little shit if I have to; I’ve done it before. We are that close, close enough we can beat the hell out of each other and then stand and shake hands. He knows when I’m serious and when I’m joking around.

  He nods his head and begins doing something on his cell phone. Placing it to his ear, he waits. "Hey, Lauren. I need to know where Kinzleigh is." He pauses and looks at me. "Something important came up."

  He walks over to the bar and jots something down on a piece of paper. I wonder who Lauren is. I've never heard Kinzleigh mention anyone that goes by that name. Whoever it is isn't important. All I care about is one thing: her location. He finishes the call and slides his phone in the pocket of his swim trunks.

  I walk over to him and hold out my hand. He looks a little nervous. "Are you sure you want to do this? Don't do anything stupid, Breyson. Your son, Bryce, is due next month; three weeks to be exact."

  I place my hand over my heart as I process what he just said. It's a boy...I'm going to have a son. I had the feeling from the visions, but nothing was real until now. I close my eyes; causing the tears I've been holding back in all my anger and rage to fall free. I repeat the sentence in my mind. "Wait, what did you call him?"

  "Bryce...Bryce Patrick Abercrombie, after you. That's what she named the baby. She's been through a lot, Breyson. I know you have too, and you're upset, but the Kinzleigh that you see in that photo and the Kinzleigh she was before he went back and got her are two totally different people. You wouldn't even recognize her if you saw the girl she was a few months ago. I don't really like seeing them together either, but he pulled her out of the fire when no one else could, including your brothers. All I'm saying is to think about that when you show up like Rambo and let your jealousy take control."

  My knees feel weak. I lower myself onto the barstool, feeling like I'm about to pass out. Around every corner there is something that proves we belong together. There is an inner connection that is attempting to pull us back together. She named our son the very name that I went by in Spain. Could it be coincidence? Yes, I believe so. Do I think that it is? No, I do not. My hands are shaking and my pulse is erratic.

  I don't care what I have to do to get her back I'll do it. If I have to I'll chase her to the end of the earth. The truth is I would rope the moon or catch her a star if that's what she wanted. I just need to remind her that we are meant to be. There are too many signs that point us in the direction of forever. "Ryland, will you take me to her? Please...I need to see her." I look him in the eyes. "Because I can't lose her." My tone shows that I've cooled down tremendously.

  He speaks quietly. "Yeah man. Of course I will." I have to believe she is still mine. I have to believe that when she sees me everything will align and be right in world again. I have to believe that we're meant to be together forever, because the alternative is not an option for me.

  ***

  I've officially had enough traveling. When this is all over I'm not going anywhere for a long time. Ryland pulls in a large resort that sits on the beach. At least they didn't go out of the state for whatever this little getaway is supposed to represent. I don't even want to think about what I'm about to walk into. My mind is starting to stray and the thought is making me sick.

  Shut it down, Breyson. Shut. It. Down.

  He stops and kills the engine. I look over at him when he places his hand on my shoulder and hands me a slip of paper with the opposite hand. "You're going to need this. It has the room number on it because they asked to be undisturbed, so they aren't allowed to give out any information. Whatever you say, you didn't get this information from Lauren. She works for Preston and is one of Kinzleigh's best friends. She has no idea why I asked you for this information and her job could be at stake if Preston finds out she gave out his private information without his consent. I'll stay here until you're done."

  I take the piece of paper and step out of his truck. When I read the room and floor number, I raise my head and look into the sky at the building before me, top floor. Here goes nothing.

  Call it excitement if you want, that the most important girl in the world to me is a few floors away, but it doesn't take me long to make it to the elevator. In fact, I'm pretty sure to the average passerby I probably looked like a blur.

  I begin pacing in the elevator car as it ascends. It feels like it's going one mile per hour. I watch the lights above the door light up as it bypasses each floor. "Come on." It feels like an eternity when the door finally opens on the top floor.

  I walk to the door and place my fist up to knock on the door, but stop. This is it. This is the moment I've waited for almost seven months now. I knock on the door and wait. Nothing. I knock again, louder this time. I finally hear someone stirring. The small footsteps tell me it's Kinzleigh.

  She opens the door and it takes all that I have not to grab her up in my arms. Damn, she's beautiful. Her curly blonde hair is sticking out in every direction and she has the most beautiful form of an ugly look on her face from being woken from her sleep. She always did hate to be awakened. The small slits that are her eyes are trying to focus. She hasn't completely made out my features yet.

  My eyes run down her tiny body. She's wearing a pink tee shirt. No surprise there it's her favorite color. It's tight around her belly where my son is growing. Seeing it in reality is so much different than in a photo. I can't believe I've missed this. I will not break down right now. It is not the time, nor the place. Her legs are still gorgeous. Short, but muscular and made to be wrapped around me.

  "Hey, Kinz. How you been?" I probably sound like an idiot right now, but I don't care. I want to hear her voice. She balls up her fists and rubs her eyes. When she has them fully open, her face changes into something I don't like. I know that look in those deep green eyes. I don't like to see her in pain, especially not when looking at me.

  She looks behind her and steps outside in the hall, shutting the door. We are completely alone. Her lips are better than I remember. What comes out of them, though, pains me. "Braxton, what are you doing here?"

  She thinks I'm my twin brother. I never even thought of that. I have no idea how to deal with this. "I'm here for you."

  She is zoned out, staring at me. Her eyes scan each feature on my face, locking it away in her memory. She doesn't even realize that she's doing it and that I'm watching her do it. Her eyes aren't as bright as they were when I left. She looks like she's missing something vital. It's killing me to watch her long
for me. She is so obvious anyone would know it. It's now that I realize how right Ryland was. If my beautiful girl looks like this now, what did she look like six months ago? "Kinzleigh."

  She shakes her head slightly. "I'm sorry. I'm just tired. I had a late night. Not sleeping well these days," she says as she lays her hands on opposite sides of her belly. "Why are you here, Braxton? Is Adalynn okay?"

  Not being able to touch her is torture. I want her. God knows I do. I want her forever; I have since the day I laid eyes on her. I want our baby. I want a life together. I don’t care how young we are, there is always a way to make it work. I catch a glimpse of the diamond on her finger and it fuels my anger.

  I take a step closer to her. "Kinzleigh, it's me, Breyson."

  Her eyes glaze over. She slaps me across the face. It stings, but I don't budge. She places her hand over her mouth. The tears run down her face, staining her cheeks. My cheek is burning, but if it relieves some of the pain that she's holding inside, I'll gladly deal with it. She removes her hand and her lips are quivering. "I'm so sorry. It's just that...You know that...you know how much I miss him. You know why I can't be around you, Braxton. Please go."

  She turns to leave and I grab her hand, pulling her to me. I place my palms on her face so I can be sure she's looking at me. "Do you remember what I always told you, beautiful girl? I told you I'd never leave you. I told you I'd always find you, 'til death do us part. I meant it, Kinzleigh. I'll cross any barrier, I'll swim any distance, and I'll fight any battle to make it back to you. I've already survived a plane crash and amnesia, I think I can handle anything."

  She looks like a deer caught in headlights. I have her attention, so I keep going. "I remember every kiss, every time I made love to you, and every time you told me you loved me. We were made for each other, Kinz. I know that when I wanted to give up, you kept me going. There are a lot of things that I can't explain, but I can explain that your soul and my soul are designed to fit together. If you don't believe it's me, ask me anything that only I would know."

  She doesn't say anything. It's clear she's confused, hurt, and maybe even angry. "You don't have anything to say, I'll say it for you. You want me to name the best things that have ever happened to me? Let's move through time, shall we. The first time I ever saw you on the beach you took my breath away. I knew you were different. The first time I kissed you on the pier you hooked me. The first time I made love to you in your bed, you ruined me."

  I wipe the tears that are soaking her face. "The first time you left me instead of taking me to the airport, you changed me. The first time you came after me, you caught me. That week last summer was the best week of firsts in my life, but that's only the beginning. When you trusted me enough to be mine, you made me realize how much I needed to try in order to keep you."

  "You gave me your heart on Homecoming and I'm here to claim it back. You marked your body for me on your birthday and I'm taking that back too. You promised me forever by our tree at Christmas and forever starts today. You conceived my baby at the start of a new year that signified our love for one another, planned or not it was meant to be."

  I pin her against the door. "I should have stayed home instead of leaving on the day you were sick. I didn't put it together that you were pregnant. If I would have followed my gut and took care of you, we wouldn't have wasted so much time apart. I always have and always will be yours, Kinzleigh. I would do anything for you. You own my heart. Even when we're apart, ultimately we are connected. When I was gone, somehow my mind still dreamt of you and kept you alive in my memory when everything else slept. When I didn't know my name, I chose Bryce, just as you chose it for our son."

  She gasps and her green eyes sparkle a little. "You want to know if it's really me then there is only one way to find out.” I bend forward and press my lips to hers. When I do, everything feels like it shifts back into alignment for the first time since I woke up in that hospital back in February. No one will ever be able to convince me that we aren't fated for each other.

  I take my time kissing her, reintroducing myself to her, and savoring her. This moment right here makes everything that I've had to go through worth it. I didn't expect for fate to throw a major curveball when I boarded that plane, but sometimes you have to ride the wave that occurs as a result, because the final destination may be worth it.

  Chapter 29

  Kinzleigh

  The world around me fades away. His kiss, and only his kiss does this to me. He places me in a trance each time we're together. I thought I was crazy; completely insane and I still could be, but I'm drowning in my own tears from listening to his quick version of our life story.

  Finally, I've left Hell and entered into Heaven. I haven't touched these lips in so long. Without a thought, I tangle my hands into his hair and stand on my tiptoes to fully reach him. He runs his hands up and down my body in frenzy. I can feel his need to claim my body pressed against me. What am I doing?

  I pull away from him and look back at the hotel room door. The man I agreed to marry is inside. I got so emotional about him showing up out of nowhere, that I didn't even consider I'm not a free woman. What am I supposed to do now? I'm reminded of what I did last night. I slept with another man. Oh God, I've slept with another man and he's alive. What have I done?

  I place my hands over my face in shame. I look him in the eyes with so much guilt I almost can't breathe. Panic is starting to set in. How do I explain any of this? "Kinzleigh, what's wrong?"

  "I can't do this," I whisper. My entire body feels like it is going to lock down. "I'm not alone."

  "I gathered that much, Kinzleigh. Come back with me. Ryland is downstairs. I'm here to stay. We can be a family." I start crying to the point of it becoming verbal. Every word he says comes at my heart like a serrated knife. I've done the one thing that is unforgivable.

  "I can't." My breaths are coming out in pants and my throat is hurting.

  "You can't be fucking serious. You're not going to stay with him. Did you not hear anything I just said? I'm not leaving here without you."

  I can feel a panic attack starting. I have to tell him. I'll never be able to live with myself if I don't tell him. "I slept with him."

  He stops and presses into the doorframe that he's holding onto. "I don't care, Kinzleigh. It would be a little shitty for me to be mad when I was allegedly pronounced dead. I figured when I came here that you had been with him. I've been with someone too. It was a few months back when I confused, depressed, and not sure how to decipher fantasy from reality. I had amnesia so I didn't know who you were and I was drunk. I swear to you it'll never happen again for as long as I live."

  I only cry harder. It doesn't make it any easier to know that we're equal. Now, I'm torn, stuck in quicksand and rapidly sinking. I didn't ask for any of this. "I didn't sleep with him until last night...after we announced our engagement."

  He is staring at me blankly. I'm not sure what he's going to say. He looks mad and hurt, but not as upset as I would’ve previously imagined he would be in this situation. "Do you love him?"

  My heart falls to the pit of my stomach as the questions lingers in the air between us. No matter what I say, someone is going to get hurt in this situation. I never wanted to love someone else, but I do. I love two people; the depth in which I love them each are different, but still love in the same.

  Breyson and I lose ourselves in one another. The love that we feel for each other is uncontrollable, a dangerous intoxication. No one will ever love Breyson like I love Breyson, but no one will curse him like I curse him either. Everything since I've met him hits me like a tidal wave. I continue fighting for air as I consider what I have to do to save him.

  I'm taken back to February by my mind that never stops. The place is the cemetery when I went to talk to Beau, when I met Macie. The reason is a certain promise I made and now is due time to collect. I made a promise before God and everyone that lies to rest there, that if Breyson's life was spared, I would let him go; I would
let him live.

  Being in love with me guarantee's that I will be in love with him and in turn be the cause of his death, it's already happened once. I don't know why, but each person I allow myself to love with no holds barred ends up hurt in some way. Maybe it's because I was so critical of love in the prior years of my life or maybe it's because I was selfish and the consequence is to never reap the benefits of an unselfish love; a true love.

  God knows how much I love him, how much I want him, and how much I need him, but the one word that is emphasized is I. It's not about me anymore. Being with me is not what's best for him. He's spent the last half-year away from everything he loves. He deserves a shot at happiness; a chance to do something he loves like play football. He may think this is what he wants now, but he'll see that he's better off without me.

  The first time in my life I'm going to be completely unselfish for him and for Bryce. I'm not giving myself what I want. If I stay with Preston, I know Breyson can experience being a college student with nothing holding him back and Bryce will be financially taken care of with a roof over his head. After this I'm going to want to crawl in a whole and die, but it's something I have to do. I have to let him go.

  "Yes, Breyson. I do love him, but I also love you too. In your absence I made a promise to him that I'm going to keep." The look in his eyes is making me wither inside. My body is aching from a lack of necessary oxygen as I take short, irregular breaths. I want to completely break down, but I have to be strong. He'll never let me go if he can see how I really feel. I have to find the strength I've never found inside myself before. I have to be strong for the both of us.

  His face moves closer to mine, almost kissing me. "I call bullshit. You don't want to be with him. You're just scared. You know you want to be with me. For once let your stubbornness rest." His breath is tickling my lips and my body is reacting to his. I fist my hands at my sides to keep them from wrapping around him. I have to lie. I have to hurt him. It's the only way that he'll believe me and move on.