The Swear Jar

by Osorio, Audra

  He waved his hands. “Wait…What? You stopped having multiple orgasms or orgasms all together?”

  “Duncan, I don’t feel comfortable talking to you about this.”

  “Meara, if we’re going to have a romantic relationship, I need to be your friend too. As your friend, you’ve told me something I find disturbing. I’ve heard of women who fake orgasms, but I’ve never heard of women who suppress them.”

  She sighed. “At first, I stopped myself. Then it didn’t happen at all. Being intimate wasn’t high up on Hank’s agenda, so when he lost interest, it was a relief.”

  She put a hand over her mouth. She had never told anyone what had happened with Hank. She felt so comfortable with Duncan. She wanted to tell him everything.

  He cradled her against his chest and kissed her forehead. “Talking about Hank upsets you. I can understand. If we’re going to have a relationship, we’re going to talk about Brenda and Hank. You’ve let me talk about Brenda. When you’re ready to talk about Hank, I’ll be here.”

  She whispered, “Thank you.”

  “For the record, you didn’t ruin anything. When, and I do mean when, we become intimate, I expect you to be yourself. Understood?” He was still angry about Hank.

  “Yes, Duncan.”

  “May I ask an awkward question?”

  “I’ll see if I can answer it.”

  “Was it me or just a physical release?” He held his breath.

  He loved her. He hoped she would love him too, in time. He needed her to want him as much as he wanted her. His heart was aching for her, but he could wait for her. He wanted to be whole again and he didn’t want it to only be about sex.

  She whispered shyly. “It was you. I know it sounds cliché, but please believe me when I say I’ve never felt this way before. When I’m with you, I forget everything else. There’s only you and me. If you hadn’t stopped, I wouldn’t have stopped you. It’s not very old-fashioned of me.”

  His heart soared as he decided to tease her. “Were you serious about helping me?”

  “That’s two questions. You’ve hit your limit.” She hid her bright red face in his chest.

  “I’ll take that as a yes.”

  “DUNCAN!” She giggled.

  Hearing that giggle, he groaned. If he didn’t leave soon, he might do something he regretted. He wanted her to say she loved him before they became intimate. He was going to need a cold shower tonight and one tomorrow morning.

  “I should go,” he whispered, not sounding too convincing.

  “All right,” she murmured, disappointed.

  “May I call you tomorrow after you see the doctor?”

  “No.” She shook her head.

  Hurt, he asked, “Why not?”

  She stroked his cheek. “I don’t know when the appointment is. I’m not sure when you should call me. May I call you?”

  Grinning, he nodded his head. “That’s a better plan. I’ll go in the morning and pick up the paint equipment.”

  “I feel terrible you have to spend part of your day cleaning up my mess.”

  He kissed her once. “It’s our mess. If you call me, it’ll be worth it. Who am I kidding? One kiss is not enough.”

  He kissed her deeply. She ran her fingers through his hair. He rubbed his thumb over her dimple. He really didn’t want to leave. She really didn’t want him to leave.

  “Will you be all right by yourself?” he asked.

  “As soon as you drive away, Anne will be here. Or are you offering to change me into my pajamas and tuck me into bed, Sir Duncan?” she smiled wickedly.

  “That’s a mighty tempting offer, Lady Meara.” He gave her one last kiss.

  “I’ll call you as soon as I’m back,” she said.

  “I’ll be waiting,” he said as he left.

  She sat on the couch. It was lonely without him. She listened for his car, but it was quiet. She silently cursed her ankle as she worried about him.

  Racing in, Anne sat next to her. “How’s your ankle? How did your first date go?”

  “Anne! Where is Mr. Phillips?”

  “You’re dating him and you’re still calling him Mr. Phillips?”

  “Anne!” Meara was outraged.

  “He’s talking to Mom and Dad about you. He’s finding out when they’re going to get your Jeep. You left your purse in the library. He’s making sure you get the Jeep and your purse.”

  “That’s very sweet of him. I didn’t even think of it.”

  “Are you dating Mr. Phillips?”

  “I’m not sure. I don’t know what’s going on yet.”

  “Do you think this is a big change for you?”

  “A big change? Remember how I said it was complicated? If I think too much about it, I may talk myself out of something. I don’t want to do that. I like him. Why do you want to know what’s going on? Don’t you like him?”

  “I do like him. I want you to be happy. I wonder if you have big changes coming in your life.”

  “If anything BIG CHANGES, I’ll let you know.”

  “You’re teasing me, aren’t you?”

  “Yes I am.”

  “So you’re in a good mood?”

  “Yes, I am. Did you do something you need to tell me about?”

  “No. I was just wondering.”

  “You’re freaking me out. You’re up to something, but you’re not telling me.”

  There was a knock at the door. It was Diana. Raising an eyebrow, she shook her finger at Anne while Meara couldn’t see. Anne frowned, but kept quiet.

  “How’s your ankle, Ems?” Diana said, using Meara’s nickname.

  “It’s better. The Tylenol’s wearing off. Where’s Duncan?” asked Meara.

  “Ben’s helping him back out of the driveway,” Diana said. “Anne, it’s almost bedtime. I’ll take care of Aunt Ems.”

  They heard a car start. Anne kissed Meara good night. Diana and Meara were left alone. Diana sat next to Meara.

  “It’s been a while since you called me Ems,” said Meara.

  “It’s been a while since you acted like Ems,” said Diana. “I haven’t seen you this happy in a long time. I know you don’t like to talk about things, but give me a clue here. What’s going on between you and Duncan?”

  “We met at the supermarket back in June. He interviewed me and I got the job. I’ve been working there ever since. And today I twisted my ankle.”

  “And now you’re holding hands and giving each other goofy faces. Yes, don’t deny the faces! I saw you watching him. That didn’t start today. What’s going on, Ems?”

  “At the supermarket, I looked up. There he was with his beautiful, smiling green eyes. He offered me a quarter for the shopping cart. When I got the job, he took us to Maple Tree Farm. He kissed my hand. My first day, he gave me flowers and chocolate. He’s been so supportive and attentive the past few months. Then today, I twisted my ankle. He rescued me.”

  “You like him. And he likes you. How did he get the paint out of your eye?”

  Meara’s ears turned bright red. “It’s our secret.”

  “Fair enough. Where does it go from here?”

  “I don’t know. It’s very new.”

  “But this is a romance, right? A mutual one?”

  “I think so. Why?”

  “I don’t want you to get hurt. Are you sure he’s serious?”

  “Yes, he’s serious. He wants to be my friend and in time, a relationship.”

  “And what do you want?”

  Meara longed for him to be there. “The same.”

  Diana hugged her. “Let’s get you drugged up and put to bed. Your appointment is at eleven tomorrow. Ben and I are meeting Duncan at the library at nine tomorrow morning. He wanted to make sure we got your purse and car keys. He’s very sweet on you. Ben and I like him.”

  Meara awoke to knocking on her front door. She didn’t want to get out of bed. She had been thinking about Duncan all night. There was a small ache in her chest. She had pulled the extra
pillow close and hugged it like it was him. She wished the knocking would stop. It had to be Anne.

  “Aunt Meara! Are you awake?” called Anne as the front door creaked open. “Aunt Meara! Is it okay to come in?”

  She pulled the blanket over her head. Her ankle throbbed. Her head had a bad bump. Anne would stand at the front door all morning until she answered.

  “Aunt Meara! Are you okay? Mom sent me over to get you up. They left to get your Jeep. Aunt MEARA!” Anne howled.

  “Okay, come in! I’m still in bed!” Meara grumbled.

  Anne bounded into the room and landed on the bed. Luckily, she missed Meara’s ankle. Anne squirmed, making Meara feel seasick.

  “Anne! Please, I’m going to throw up. Is it that late already?”

  “Time to get up, slug-a-bed! You need to eat breakfast, take some Tylenol and take a shower,” Anne said, using her fingers to count off, as if Diana had rehearsed this speech with her.

  “Yes ma’am! So what’s for breakfast?”

  “Can you make it out to the kitchen counter?”

  “I think so. The ankle still hurts, but not as bad as yesterday. What are you going to feed your starving Aunt Meara?”

  “Cereal. The healthier, the better.”

  “You’re trying to kill me, aren’t you?”

  “Maybe.”

  “Let me see if I can walk on my own. Get ready to catch me or call 911.”

  “Mom told me if you fall, I should let you lie on the floor.”

  “Your mom’s evil. I taught her well.”

  “I’ll go set up your breakfast. Let me know if you need help. I’ll listen for a big thump.”

  “Thanks, Anne. You’re an angel of mercy. NOT.”

  Meara could hear Anne rummaging around the kitchen. She shifted herself until she was on the edge of the bed. She gingerly placed her bad ankle on the floor. She stood, favoring the good ankle. Pain radiated up her leg, but she was able to stand. She slowly walked down the hallway to the kitchen.

  “That’s good! You can walk! Here, sit down. Your appointment is at eleven. It’s almost nine thirty now. Mom and Dad should be back soon. Do you want me to get your clothes out?”

  “I’m capable of getting my own clothes together. I’ll wear my flip flops. I don’t think I could get my ankle into a sneaker.”

  “You hate wearing socks and shoes, don’t you? Is that why you take them off as soon as you get home?”

  “My little piggies hate being penned up!”

  Anne giggled. Meara ate her cereal while Anne chattered on about summer camp. She tried to listen, but she tuned Anne out as she thought about Duncan. She could feel his lips on hers. She remembered other things he had done.

  “Are you okay?” asked Anne. “Your face is turning red. Do you want the Tylenol now?”

  “Yes, that’s a good idea. My ankle is starting to throb again.”

  She showered quickly. Dressed in comfortable clothes, she carefully slipped on flip flops. She hobbled back to the living room. There was a knock at the door. Meara’s heart skipped a beat. Coming in, Diana pointed Anne towards their house. Anne kissed Meara and ran out. Sitting next to Meara, Diana shook her head and laughed.

  “Ems, your face is priceless. Let me guess, you were hoping for Duncan?”

  “Did I say that? I didn’t say that.”

  “You didn’t have to with those big blue eyes of yours. Duncan had the same look on his face when we met him at the library. He knew you wouldn’t come, but it didn’t stop him from hoping. If you’re a good girl, I’ll tell you what Duncan was wearing, how he looked and what he said.”

  “I’m not interested in that.” She tried to sound haughty.

  “Yes, you are. Now get moving. We have some time to run errands.”

  “Yes, ma’am. Will you at least remember to crack the windows?”

  “I’ll think about it.”

  Chapter Fourteen

  Driving the Jeep through downtown Pin Oak Grove, Diana chatted while Meara fidgeted. She wanted to know what had happened at the library. She was trying not to scream since she knew Diana was purposely avoiding the subject.

  Diana laughed. “You’re about to explode. You lasted pretty long. You’re learning patience. Let’s see. Duncan had on jeans and a gray short-sleeved t-shirt. He was wearing sneakers.”

  Meara frowned. “Sneakers? I missed sneakers? Damn ankle!”

  “He showed us your office. He went off to clean up the painting stuff and Ben helped him. It didn’t take long. I got your purse and we drove home.”

  “Did he say anything?”

  “No, we used hand signals. Of course he said things. He asked how you were. He said you were a terrific librarian and he was lucky to have you. He asked me when your appointment was. I told him. We all left. Satisfied?”

  “Yes, thank you. I promised I would call him after the appointment. He wants to know I’m okay.”

  “To let him know you’re okay. Yeah, I’m sure.”

  Meara scrunched up her face and stuck out her tongue. “You’re such a meanie!”

  “Takes one to know one, Ems,” Diana said. “We’re here.”

  “Di, is this necessary?” Meara asked. “If I stay off the ankle, it should get better.”

  “Get out and hobble into that office!”

  “Yes, Di.”

  Meara yelped in pain twice on the way into the office. Diana checked in with the receptionist. They sat down. Huffing, Meara squirmed in the waiting room chair.

  “Stop fidgeting, Ems. I’m not letting you weasel out.” Diana complained.

  “She’s only looking at the ankle, right?”

  “Yeah, sure.” Diana wouldn’t make eye contact with Meara.

  Meara scowled. The nurse called Meara’s name. They followed the nurse to the examination room. Meara was handed a paper gown.

  “Please remove all your clothing. Have the gown open to the front. You can relieve your bladder in the bathroom,” the nurse said.

  After the nurse left, Diana chided. “Now don’t start. She’s looking at the ankle. It’s standard procedure.”

  Meara gave Diana the raspberry as she went into the bathroom. Diana rolled her eyes. Meara returned with the gown wrapped around her. She looked at the stirrups attached to the examination table.

  “She better not even think about it.” Meara growled.

  “Take it easy,” Diana said, laughing.

  Dr. Wong knocked and entered. She shook hands with Meara and Diana. She raised an eyebrow.

  “I’m here for backup,” Diana said.

  “Whose backup?” asked Dr. Wong.

  “Yours. She doesn’t like doctors. No offense,” Diana said.

  “None taken. I’ve seen it before,” Dr. Wong replied. “Mrs. Martin, what seems to be the problem today? Your sister mentioned an ankle?”

  “Yes, I twisted my ankle. It’s just a sprain. If I stay off of it, it’ll be fine in a day or two,” Meara said.

  “How did you twist your ankle?”

  “I fell off a ladder at work.”

  “Let me look at it.” Dr. Wong examined Meara’s ankle, flexing it and her toes. “I agree with you. It doesn’t look broken or respond as if you tore a ligament. I could send you for an x-ray, but we can hold off for now. Keep it elevated, take Tylenol to reduce the swelling, and if it doesn’t improve in the next few days, let me know.”

  “Thank you Dr. Wong, I will. Can I swim?” asked Meara.

  “If it isn’t painful, then go for it,” replied Dr. Wong. “I see your medical records are spotty. When was your last annual checkup? No matter, we’ll take care of that right now. Please put your feet in the stirrups and slide down to the end of the table.”

  “What?” Meara squeaked.

  “Mrs. Martin, in order for me to treat you properly, I need to make sure you’re up to date with your exams. Now, please, follow my instructions,” Dr. Wong said firmly.

  “Yes, doctor,” Meara said meekly.

  Dr. Wong
winked at Diana. “Stay close in case she kicks me in the head.”

  Diana snorted. “I got your back, Dr. Wong.”

  While Dr. Wong completed the exam, Meara refused to look at Diana. The situation was about to get even more upsetting. Diana had mentioned a delicate subject to Dr. Wong when making the appointment.

  “Mrs. Martin, how is your health in general?”

  “Fine.”

  “You could lose a few pounds. Have you thought of joining a gym? Your health can be affected by your weight.”

  “I was looking at a gym with an indoor pool. I like swimming.”

  “Are you sexual active, Mrs. Martin? It’s rather personal, I know, but it’s important I cover all health issues.”

  “I’m a widow, Dr. Wong. My husband passed away five years ago.”

  “I’m sorry. If there is a chance you’ll become sexually active, I should inform you of your options.”

  “No, I don’t need to discuss it.”

  Diana stepped closer. “Meara, hear her out. Things can change. It can’t hurt to be prepared.”

  Meara’s face turned a bright red. “Diana!”

  “Mrs. Martin, your sister wants you to be safe. There are STDs to consider. And pregnancy is possible until you reach menopause.”

  “Pregnancy? Slow down! Diana, what did you tell Dr. Wong?”

  “I told her you might need birth control.”

  “Diana, this is a small town! Let’s be careful about what we share.”

  “Anything you tell me is confidential,” said Dr. Wong. “I don’t need details. I want you to protect yourself. Let’s leave it this way. I’ll write you a prescription. It’s best to wait a month for it to be fully effective. Until then, use a condom.”

  Meara’s face went blank. Thoughts of making love with Duncan ran through her head. She blushed furiously. She was livid with Diana.

  “I’ll leave a prescription with the receptionist. It was nice meeting you, Mrs. Martin. Diana, I’ll be seeing you soon for your annual?”

  “Yes, Dr. Wong. And thank you.” Diana smiled broadly. “Now was that so hard, Ems?”

  Meara scowled. “You’re so dead. Birth control?”

  Diana grinned. “Be prepared. Now get dressed.”

  The receptionist handed Meara a prescription. Hobbling out to the Jeep, Meara held the piece of paper by the corner like it was toxic waste. Diana rolled her eyes and started the Jeep. Meara was silent.