Saving Grace: A Novel (Healing Ruby Book 3)

by Jennifer H. Westall

  When I stepped out onto the path, Matthew was pacing a few feet away. My heart skipped and sped up, just like it had done so often before. I waited for his pacing to turn him back in my direction, and when he faced me, I tried to think of where to begin.

  “Thank you for meeting me,” I said. “I’m sorry about all this.”

  I thought at first that he was angry, but I realized his pacing was out of worry. He looked absolutely stricken. “Ruby, you don’t look well. Are you sick? Are you hurt? What’s going on? I don’t understand why you’ve been so distant and cold. I don’t understand anything that’s going on.”

  “I guess I have a lot to explain.”

  He came to me and took my shoulders in his hands. “Look at you. You’re wasting away. I can feel your bones. Aren’t you eating?”

  I was so tired, and he was so near. Without any thought, I leaned into him and rested my head on his chest. He wrapped his arms around my back and supported me. It felt so wonderful; I didn’t want to move. As he spoke, his voice rumbled through his chest. “Talk to me, please. I need to know what’s going on.”

  My knees were about to buckle. “I need to sit down.”

  He lifted me into his arms like a child and carried me off the path to a large boulder. Carefully he lowered us both to the ground, leaning his back against the boulder and pulling me into his lap. I had no energy to resist, and I didn’t want to. I sat across his legs and rested my cheek on his shoulder. My eyes were so heavy, and his body was so comforting. He stroked my arms and kissed my forehead, and all I wanted to do was sleep right there until all the madness was over.

  Through the haze of my thoughts, I heard him praying over me, asking the Lord to give me strength. His words spread like a warm blanket over me, and I loved him more in that moment than I ever had. Then my eyes closed and I drifted off to sleep.

  I had no idea how long I slept there in his arms, but it was the most peaceful rest I’d had in years. I awoke with a sense of clarity that had been sorely missing since the first bombs hit Clark Field. Lifting my head from his shoulder, I met his gaze. Matthew’s eyes searched mine, and he slid his hand from my shoulder along my neck and up to my cheek.

  “I’ve missed you so much,” he whispered.

  As he touched his lips to mine, joy spread through me like fire. Finally, after being shattered for so long, my heart was full. I sank deeper into his kiss as he slid his arms around my back and pulled me tighter against him. It was so wonderful to be so safe and so loved, that I didn’t want it to end. But eventually he pulled his face back from mine.

  “You ready to talk to me?”

  I nodded. “I’ll do my best.”

  “Why have you been pushing me away? Are you angry with me?”

  “No. It’s just…”

  “What?”

  I gazed up at him and wondered how much I should say. “If I tell you what’s been going on, you have to promise you’ll listen to me, and do what I say. You can’t go running off half-cocked and cause a scene.”

  “Ruby, I can’t promise I won’t get upset. But you can trust me.”

  “Remember when I accidentally spilled the beans about Chester attacking me? You remember how you handled that?”

  He leaned his head back against the boulder and looked up at the sky. “Yes.”

  “And you remember when I told you about what happened between Chester and me in the barn? About Samuel being the one who killed him? How you promised me that you wouldn’t tell anyone?”

  “Yes.”

  “And what did you do?”

  “I told Mr. Oliver.” He straightened again and looked on me with a hint of righteous indignation. “But you should’ve told him the whole truth from the beginning. Maybe we wouldn’t have gotten into such a mess.”

  “You know why I couldn’t do that. But listen, the point is if I tell you things, you have to keep your cool.”

  He grimaced, but then agreed. “All right, then. Tell me everything, and I’ll be as cool as can be.”

  I doubted that, but it was time to explain everything, whether he kept his promise or not. I couldn’t bear this anymore alone. “You know that girl, Natalie?”

  Matthew’s head dropped back against the boulder again. “Ruby, I’m so sorry about getting involved with her, but you have to know I never had any interest in her. Not really.”

  “I believe you,” I said, though the image of him kissing her still stung. “But that’s not what this is about.”

  He straightened again. “It’s not?”

  “No. You see, while we were at Fort Stotsenburg, Natalie overheard you call me Ruby. And she’d mentioned before that I seemed familiar to her. Well, it turns out she’s from Nashville, and her aunt is Ms. Harmon.”

  “Who?”

  “You remember. The older lady who rented the room to me in Hanceville. She kicked me out when I got arrested.”

  Understanding dawned in his expression. “Oh, Ruby. Natalie knows who you really are, doesn’t she?”

  “Yes, and at first she threatened to turn me in.” His face reddened, but to his credit he didn’t interrupt. “I tried to explain to her that I was defending myself and that Chester had attacked me. She said she wouldn’t say anything, and I thought if I just kept my head down and did my job quietly, I could disappear again when this was all over. But, then…then she told me to stay away from you.”

  “She what?” He sat up straight as a board, nearly bouncing me out of his lap. I scooted off him and stood, ’cause I could see he’d need to pace this news out. Sure enough, he jumped up and went to pacing, huffing like an angry bull. “She told you to stay away from me?”

  “Yes. She said you were a good man, and shouldn’t be mixed up with me. And at the time, I had to agree with her. I didn’t want you to go down with me if something happened.”

  He stopped and rubbed the back of his neck, doing his best to stay calm. “So that’s why you acted the way you did. You were pushing me away to protect yourself. And I just kept coming at you. Has she threatened you again?”

  I hesitated, knowing this was the moment of truth. I took a deep breath, and decided I was done lying. “She made it clear she’d turn me in if I didn’t give her my breakfast every morning.”

  He stared at me wide-eyed, looking me over again. “Oh, Ruby. And you did, didn’t you? That’s why you’re so…weak.”

  I nodded. “But I’m not letting her have her way with me anymore. I mean, I don’t care so much about giving her some food. I’ve gone hungry before, and I can survive it again. But I’m done giving her my joy. I’m done with giving her you.”

  He stepped over to me and cupped my face in his hands. Then he kissed me, filling my cup again. “We’ll figure this out together, all right?” he said. “I swear. I’m not losing you again.”

  Matthew

  It was all I could do to keep myself from marching right over to Natalie and giving her a piece of my mind. But I realized that Ruby was right. Every time she’d confided in me, I’d blown it. Well, I couldn’t admit that I blew it when I told Mr. Oliver about Samuel—I’d still do the same thing given the chance. And it had felt good to deck Chester after what he did to Ruby. But my actions had affected her ability to trust me, and I needed to stop taking matters into my own hands when it came to her. So I fought my instincts and kept my cool just like I promised.

  Ruby and I agreed that we needed to think on things and come up with a plan we both agreed to. She could point the finger at me all day long, but if she was being honest, she’d see that she was always just as stubborn and determined to do things her own way as I was. But I didn’t point that out since she seemed so willing to solve this problem together.

  Instead, I kept my focus on her immediate needs, which was food first, and possibly medical attention. I kept my distance after we came out of the jungle, but I kept a close eye on her to make sure she went to the mess area to eat. There was no sign of Natalie, and as far as I could tell, even though Ruby must have b
een starving, she only picked at the rice and tomatoes.

  As I was getting ready to leave with Henry, Natalie appeared, walking over to us as we were helping to load medical supplies onto the truck that was our ride back to Cabcaben. She smiled at me, which made my stomach swim. I had a good mind to tell her to buzz off, but I’d promised Ruby not to act any differently with her until we decided on the best course of action. So I forced a smile in return.

  “Are you leaving already?” she said, pushing her lips into a pout.

  “Sorry, but we have to get back to camp while it’s still daylight.”

  “But I didn’t even get to spend any time with you.”

  I glanced over at Henry, who threw a crate onto the truck without looking at us. But his eyebrows shot up all the same. “Listen Natalie, I’m sorry about missing you today. I really am. I’ll be back soon. You keep working hard, you hear?”

  She wrapped her arms around her stomach. “I try, but I just don’t feel so well. I think I’m coming down with malaria.”

  Good, I thought. That should keep you away from Ruby. But then I felt a sting of guilt—a small one—that I was glad she was sick. Although I’d felt sorry for Natalie after hearing about her unhappy childhood, and it certainly explained her neediness, my pity for her had dwindled to nothing. I loaded another crate onto the truck, and turned back to Natalie with an attempt to seem disappointed.

  “Looks like we have to get going. You take care. I’m sure you’ll be all right.”

  She stepped over to me and slid her arms around my waist. I wanted to rip her arms off me, but I focused on keeping my voice steady rather than thinking about her taking Ruby’s food. I pressed my hands against her back, pretending to hug her. Then I released her after a moment and headed for the back of the truck, climbing inside and giving Natalie a wave. She waved back and stood there watching the truck until we turned onto the main road.

  I sat across from Henry in the truck, waiting for him to lay into me, but not one word passed his lips during the ride back to camp. It only took a few minutes to cover the couple of kilometers, and once we arrived, we started unloading the crates of supplies straightaway. Only then did Henry break his silence.

  “So what’s going on with you and that other nurse?”

  I knew we’d need some privacy for this conversation. “Why don’t we take a walk so I can explain everything that Ruby told me today. You need to know what’s going on.”

  A flash of worry crossed his expression. “Is she in trouble?”

  I jerked my head toward a path that led down to the airstrip, and Henry followed me. As we walked, I told him all about Natalie, how I’d met her when I first arrived on the island and gone out with her once. I admitted I’d handled it badly when I’d found out Ruby was alive. I told him how needy Natalie had been ever since the bombing began, and hinted that there might be reason to believe she wasn’t entirely sound of mind. And I filled him in on everything Ruby had told me earlier that day. Henry walked along beside me in silence. When I finished, he came to a standstill and considered the situation for a minute.

  “What do you think we should do?” he asked.

  “I told Ruby I’d think on it and talk to you about it. We want to make sure we all agree to a solid plan.”

  “My first thought is to get her out of there. We could flee into the mountains, maybe. Hide out until all this conflict is over.”

  I’d thought of that several times already. “You think some locals would take her in? How would we protect her if the Japanese overrun the place?”

  “I’ll go AWOL. I can make it look like I was ambushed and killed or something. I’ll just be one of the many other soldiers missing in action. I can keep us fed.”

  “No,” I said. “I’ll go AWOL. I’m not getting separated from her again.”

  Henry wandered along the path for a moment, absently scratching at his face. “There’s got to be a better way. I wonder… Maybe…no. There’s Mike. But I’m not sure where to find him.”

  I reached out and caught his arm. “Hey, what are you thinking?”

  “I know this guy who flies PBYs for the Navy. In fact, he was giving Ruby flying lessons—”

  “Wait, you’re telling me Ruby’s flown a plane?” It seemed surreal that my little girl from Hanceville had commanded an aircraft. But then again, why should I be surprised?

  “Sure thing, in fact he’s taken a real shine to her—his favorite pupil.” Henry grinned, but my glare stopped that line of conversation in its tracks. “Anyway, the P-40 pilots I was talking to the other day mentioned that some planes and a couple of subs have made it through the blockade to Australia. Maybe Mike can get us word if he hears of another plan to get people out.”

  “That’s not much of a plan. And how would we even get her on a plane or sub?”

  “She’s a civilian. That works in her favor.”

  I shook my head. “That’s not enough.”

  “If she was sick enough, they might go for it.”

  We needed something stronger. Something the army would definitely act on. A policy that would ensure her safe passage. And I knew exactly what I had to do.

  Ruby

  Fenruary 20, 1942

  The next several days were much better, even though I remained weak from hunger. I gave Natalie most of my breakfast each morning, and then I did my best to keep up with my duties in the ward. Whenever I struggled to stay on my feet, I thought of Matthew’s arms around me, and I prayed for his safety. I’d thank God for leading us back to each other, and I’d ask for mercy from all the doubt and fear that had controlled me. I’d pray for God to fill me with strength to make it to the afternoon, when I could eat my full meal and go to the river to bathe.

  Late that Friday morning, a patient placed a note in my hand as I checked his blood pressure. I looked at him curiously, and he gave me a wide smile. “What’s this for?” I asked.

  “Just read it.” He winked at me, and I wondered if the morphine was making him goofy. “I didn’t write it. Believe me, if I had written it, I’d have been much more romantic. But another nurse gave it to me and told me to make sure I gave this to you when you came by.”

  I smiled down at him before opening the small piece of paper.

  Report with Miss Langston after supper to her new assignment.

  Dr. Samuel Abner

  It took a moment for me to realize the note was a message from Matthew. There was no doctor by that name at this hospital, and he’d chosen names that would only be meaningful to me. I grinned to myself at the thought of seeing him again, and I was able to finish my duties that day with only a few breaks.

  At supper I found Janine seated alone, so I sat across from her and shoveled my rice and carabao meat into my mouth. I wasn’t sure how to begin, but I was desperate to know if we were meeting Matthew later, so I bit the bullet and asked.

  “Do you know what’s going on?” I asked.

  “What do you mean?” Janine kept on chewing without looking at me.

  “Do you know about the note I received earlier today?”

  “Something about a new assignment. Yeah.”

  I leaned over the table and lowered my voice. “Is it Matthew?”

  She glared at me and told me to shush. But I could see something glinting in her eyes. I clamped my mouth shut, and waited impatiently for her to finish her food. Tonight was a treat for some reason, as we also had canned peaches. The slight amount of sugar was enough to send my blood racing through my body. We cleaned our places, and quietly made our way back to the nurses’ quarters. The long walk was agonizing, but I figured it was important to follow Janine’s lead, especially when I saw Natalie sitting on her cot, filing her nails just across the small clearing.

  Calmly, Janine gathered her soap and a clean cloth, her usual items for bathing in the river. So I gathered mine as well, no trace of excitement visible on my face. We made our way down toward the bank, but before we got there, we made a right turn and began heading upstr
eam. We climbed over roots and rocks, curved around vines and foliage, and eventually came to a place where a large tree had fallen across the water. Janine stopped there and leaned against it. As exhilarated as I was to see Matthew, I was about out of energy.

  At that moment, Henry and Matthew emerged from across the river and crossed the fallen tree to our side. They jumped down, Henry with a triumphant smile. “See,” he said. “Told you my best girls would be able to follow instructions.”

  “Yeah, yeah,” Matthew said with a chuckle. “Now scram.”

  Henry slipped an arm around Janine. “Come on, baby. Let’s give these two some alone time.”

  They walked further upstream, but I could hear Janine’s giggles drifting along with the river, so they couldn’t have gone too far. I didn’t have time to think about it much, because soon Matthew had me wrapped in his arms, and the only thing that mattered was soaking up every second with him. After a few moments of tender kisses and whispered greetings, we made our way to a few rocks along the riverbank. I took a seat, and Matthew pulled a small handkerchief out of his pocket.

  “Take this,” he said.

  I unwrapped it to find a few morsels of what appeared to be roasted meat. “What is it?”

  “Don’t ask. Just eat all of it. You need your strength.”

  I picked over it, wondering just what kind of creature I was feasting on. “How did you get this?”

  “Your brother’s pretty ingenious when he wants to be.”

  I chewed on one of the morsels. It was stringy and tough, but not so bad I couldn’t swallow it. “Thank you,” I said.

  He stood next to me while I finished it, then tucked the handkerchief back into his pocket. “I’ll bring you as much as I can whenever we come. I think we can get over here at least two or three times a week. Can you meet that often?”