by Amira Rain
"Cole thought Eric was the big damned problem, though, and apparently Leo felt similarly, but he knew he couldn't stand up to Eric himself, because he knew he couldn't take on Eric and all the other Angels at once. Or even just Eric alone. So, he flew over to Cole's, told him what had happened and what was still happening, and Cole flew over to the mansion without a second thought. Leo was a little slower in Angel form, or maybe he was just a little apprehensive, whichever, was a little slower to follow, but he arrived at the mansion a minute or two after Cole did, and came in on a pretty crazy scene."
Cassie paused to take a sip of coffee, and it was all I could do to restrain myself from asking her what was happening inside the mansion, knowing that she'd tell me when she set her mug down, and she did.
"So, Leo comes into the dining room, and three of Eric's lieutenants are already decapitated on the floor. In wolf form, Cole is already working on killing the others. Leo said he was fighting like nothing he'd ever seen in his life, just frenzied, completely enraged. Pretty sure that Cole didn't need his help, Leo went about dragging Mary-Alice, Kelly, and Tina off to the kitchen, so that they wouldn't accidentally get hurt. Trying to stop Mary-Alice's bleeding, Leo remained in the kitchen, so he wasn't too clear about what happened next, but after ten minutes or something, everything went pretty quiet, and he came back out to the obliterated dining room to find that Cole had killed Eric, and most everyone else.
"Anyone who'd tried to defend Eric, he'd killed, and that was all but two Angels. Fast forward to a few minutes later, and what was left of poor Mary-Alice's tongue just would not stop bleeding, and there were no medical professionals in the village at that time. So, long story short, Cole raced a hundred miles to an Angel-controlled town called Morley, informed the leader there that he was now the leader of New Bad Axe, grabbed a doctor and a nurse and a bunch of medical supplies, and boated them back across Lake Huron, arriving back in the mansion just in time to save Mary-Alice's life.
"The doctor said that if she'd even lost another ounce of blood, she probably would have died. The next day, the doctor and nurse delivered Kelly's baby when Kelly went into labor three weeks early. Later, she and her baby and Tina eventually went to live with Tina's grandparents in Traverse City."
Cassie paused to take another sip of her coffee, and I blotted my eyes again with a distinct ache in my chest.
With her own eyes slightly pink, Cassie blew her nose again before continuing. "Anyway, that's why Mary-Alice doesn't speak. Without her tongue, she can't anymore. Considering what horrible, traumatic memories I'm sure she has about what happened, I don't even know how she stayed in the mansion after what happened, but she seemed to be okay with it since Cole had taken power. So, all of this was because you said that you feel like you're not sure who Cole is anymore, so I just wanted to remind you. What happened with Mary-Alice and what he did to defend her...this is who he is. He's an ass-kicker and a protector. Or maybe he's an ass-kicker because he's a protector, whichever."
"You're the second person who's told me he's a protector. The first was Mary-Alice."
"Well, we're both right. So, no matter what Cole lied to you about, which is entirely your business, just know that first and foremost, he's a man who protects his community, vulnerable people, and those he loves. So, maybe all other issues can be worked out."
Already getting down from my bar stool, I nodded. "I think they can be. I just need to go home and see Cole."
*
I still didn't like the fact that Cole had lied to me. However, I figured that I didn't have to like it in order to forgive him, move on, and be happy with him, which I was now certain that I wanted to do. Feeling sure about who he was again, and also feeling a little bit silly that I'd ever doubted it, I was committed to making a fresh start with him. If he lied to me ever again, I might have to reconsider things, but somehow, I now had the feeling that he never would. By his own admission, he wasn't perfect, but he was a protector and a man of honor and integrity, and I just didn't think he'd make the same mistake twice.
Eager to tell him that I forgave him and that I still loved him, I began flying out of Cassie's kitchen, thanking her for the talk and telling her that I'd see her later, but she told me to hold up. Impatient, I whirled around and asked her what for. "I don't mean to be rude, but I just really want to get home and see Cole."
"He's probably gone by now, though. Right before you got here, Clark called me and said that he and Cole were leaving the village right then to do some kind of surveillance on Derek and Mike. Clark said that one of the scouts called Cole and said that they came back across the straits by boat, then started heading around west for some reason. So, right now, I assume Clark and Cole are heading west, too."
Thoroughly deflated, I slumped against the wall with a sigh. "Dammit."
"I know, but there's a good chance they'll be back tonight, because Derek and Mike probably will be, too. So, then you can talk to Cole. And in the meantime, we can do some eating, and gardening, and walking, and whatever else you want to do to help keep your mind off things. I'll even let you stick a worm down my pants if it might help distract you."
Unable to help myself, I laughed. "And earn myself a striptease? No, thanks. You have a lovely figure, but Cole is the only person I like to see without pants and underwear on."
Straight-faced, Cassie shrugged. "Suit yourself, but you're missing out on one seriously hot set of pregnant lady bare buns."
Laughing again, I rejoined her at the island. "Still, I think I'm going to have to pass."
Realizing that my appetite had started to return, I soon started in on my thick slice of danish, which Cassie had made from scratch herself. Light and flaky, with just the right amount of raspberry filling and cream cheese, it was delicious, but after just a few bites, I abruptly set my slice down, realizing that because of the drama of our morning discussion, I hadn't even asked Cole exactly what was going on with Derek and Mike, and if Bennett and his men had begun creeping closer to the village yet. I asked Cassie if she knew any specifics, and she set her own slice of danish down, looking a bit uncomfortable or stressed or something; I really couldn't tell.
"Well, the good news is that Derek and Bennett apparently have no clue that Cole is on to them. They haven't shown any signs of being aware that Cole, Clark, and some others have been following them."
"Okay, good. So, what's the bad news?"
"Well...the bad news is that when Cole and a few others followed Derek and Mike on their little trip out of the village recently, they discovered that Bennett and his men have gotten closer to the village. Right now, they're just across Lake Huron, about ten miles inland, staying put in a little encampment for the moment."
"But maybe that's good that they're closer now, though. Because now that Cole knows where they are, he can just attack their encampment and take them all out, right?"
Picking up her coffee mug, Cassie winced. "Well, here's the really bad news. They have women and children with them now...even what might be considered lots of women and children. At least several dozen. And Clark says there's no way in hell that Cole will attack any settlement where women and children could get hurt during a battle."
Dejected and baffled, I didn't respond right away. "Well, where in the hell did all these women and children come from? Last I heard, Bennett left Northwoods with just a couple dozen men with him."
Again, Cassie winced. "Right. But now for the really, really bad news. Apparently, since leaving Northwoods, he's picked up a bunch of other Angels, wolf shifters, and their families from various settlements. He has an idea that he wants to start his own settlement somewhere, after he has revenge on Cole for killing his brother, and he's told all these men that he'll give them positions of power in exchange for helping him out with his little revenge mission. All this info is just what Cole and others have been able to gather from their spying and eavesdropping on Derek and Mike."
"Well, how many men does Bennett have with him now?"
&
nbsp; Cassie lifted her slim shoulders in a shrug. "I don't think even Cole knows exactly, but he and Clark guess about a hundred."
"So, just about the same number of men still loyal to Cole here in the village."
For the second time that morning, I pushed my danish plate away from me after suddenly having lost my appetite.
Cassie noticed the gesture, frowning. "Look. Please try not to get all worked up about this. I'm usually the one who gets worked up about stuff, but I've been trying to change that lately, because I know it does no good. And now that I'm pregnant and need to worry about how stress might affect the baby, I'm really committed to not getting all worked up about things I can't control. Clark and I have been talking some about me just needing to trust him more about him keeping me safe, and I'm starting to really believe him on a deep level when he says that he'll never let anything bad happen to me.
"And to tell you the truth, Lauren...it's been feeling kind of scary to just kind of let all my worrying and fretting go...but at the same time, it feels pretty freeing. Clark can worry about attacks and enemies because it's his job, and because he can actually do something about stopping those enemies. I can't, though. And according to Clark, my job is just to take good care of myself physically and mentally, particularly now that I'm pregnant.
"So, that's what I'm doing. I'm just letting go, and focusing on positive things and keeping my anxiety down, knowing that Clark, Cole, and all the rest of them will take out Bennett and all his men, when and if they try to attack the village. In fact, Clark, Cole, and the others will probably take them all out before they even reach the actual village. That's what our village guards out in the forest lands are for...to sound the alarm."
"And what if Bennett and his men kill all our guards before they can sound the alarm? And what if Bennett has enlisted even more men to fight for him at that point? And what if-"
"You are really, really failing at just letting go and trusting in our men right now. No offense, but you're failing pretty miserably."
I didn't take any offense, but just sat quietly for a few moments, thinking. "Is there something wrong with the phrase 'trusting in our men'?"
"What do you mean?"
"I really don't even know exactly."
"Well, what could be wrong with trusting in our men?"
Playing with my balled-up napkin, I thought for another few moments. "Well...nothing, I guess. There's nothing wrong with trusting in our men. There's nothing wrong with trusting in them to keep us safe. But don't you ever feel like you want to be a part of keeping your own self safe, too?"
"Not really."
"So, when you think of a possible attack on our village, you don't feel like you want to be a part of the defense in some way? You don't ever feel like you somehow owe it to yourself to try to defend yourself and the community in whatever way you can, and do whatever you can to fight the attackers?"
"Why would I ever want to fight Angels or shifters? And what could I do against them anyway? What could you do? Neither of us are Gifteds, and besides, we're both pregnant."
"Well...true about the both being pregnant part, but I actually am a Gifted. Remember?"
"I always forget that about you."
"Well...I forget it sometimes, too."
"Look. Gifted or no, nobody needs to be fighting off any attackers except our men. So, let's just forget about all this and enjoy our day. And how about if we do that first by going to the mansion so we can see your ultrasound pictures."
I'd forgotten that I hadn't shown Cassie yet, or Mary-Alice. Excited about doing so, I agreed that Cassie and I should head out to the mansion first, and I soon did forget about the prospect of an attack on the village. Mostly, anyway, although it still remained somewhere in the back of my mind.
To my extreme disappointment, Cole didn't return home that night, and it was only the following night that he did. Curled up with the part of the blanket that held his scent, I'd just fallen asleep reading probably only a few minutes earlier when he climbed in beside me and took me in his arms, kind of slowly and gingerly I thought, as if he was afraid I might thrash him off of me, which I figured was probably a pretty fair thing to think.
Elated that he was home, I rolled over to face him, then wrapped an arm around his strong shoulders. "You're back."
I'd fallen asleep with my bedside table lamp on, and it the golden glow from it, his face registered surprise.
"Yes, I'm back...and I have to admit, this is a much warmer response than I was expecting. I was honestly expecting to roll right back on out of bed and into your old bedroom."
Suddenly, I felt terrible that I hadn't given him my forgiveness the morning of the day before. Although I could distinctly recall how angry and hurt I'd felt, and although I still felt like I'd had a right to be angry, something just made me wish that I'd given him my forgiveness right then, instead of making him wait for two days, not knowing if I was ever going to forgive him. It had crossed my mind to call him while he'd been gone, but for one thing, I didn't want to interrupt his surveillance work, and for another thing, I'd just wanted to be face-to-face when we spoke again. But now I regretted that I hadn't at least sent him a text.
"Cole, I love you."
"Correction...this is a much, much warmer response than I was expecting."
His full mouth was twitching with a smile, and I smiled in return, heart melting at the sight of him. But soon, I felt my smile fade. I had something serious to say to him.
"I want you to know that I forgive you. Yesterday, when I was still angry, I had to be reminded of who you are, but I don't think I'll ever forget again. I know you're a good man, and I know that you love me, and I know that even when I was angry with you, I still loved you even then. I just want to be happy with you...with you and our baby. But I also want you to know...you just can't ever lie to me again...for any reason. In return, I'll always be honest with you, too. And if you can agree to this, and promise me that you'll give me complete and total honesty from here on out, I'm ready to move forward."
Smoothing my hair with a hand, Cole looked at me with clear sincerity present in his eyes. "I swear to you, Lauren...no more lies. Ever again. This will be the start of our happily-ever-after."
I liked the sound of that. Loved the sound of that, actually.
Smiling, I brushed a brief kiss against Cole's delectable lips. Almost immediately, though, I remembered everything Cassie had told me the day before, about Bennett apparently amassing an army. Seeing the shift in my expression, Cole asked me what was wrong, and I gave him a brief recap of what Cassie had told me the day before.
"So, I feel like our official happily-ever-after won't really start until the whole Bennett situation is taken care of. I just don't think we can have any real sense of peace until then. I know I can't."
"You have to try, though...for your sake, and our baby's. You have to try to find a sense of peace, knowing that I'll always protect the two of you. Always. So, try not to think about Bennett and his fighters at all. I'll take care of them in time, whenever they dare approach the village. Just trust in me...trust that I'll always keep you safe."
I recalled Cassie's trust in our men comment of the previous day, wondering if she and Cole had been comparing notes. And it was then that it hit me what had made that comment seem somehow off to me, even though I agreed that a woman should have trust in her man. It was that trusting in my man and my man alone made me feel vaguely powerless. I would have liked it better if Cassie had said trust in our men and ourselves.
With this realization, I also realized that putting all my trust in Cole would probably just add to my anxiety, rather than decrease it. And this wasn't because I had any doubt at all that he could and would completely protect me; it was just that I was beginning to feel like I was the kind of person who needed to take a more proactive approach when it came to personal security and safety. I needed to be a part of it. Even if being part of it came with some risk.
It really made no sense, t
he idea of me putting my personal safety at risk ultimately making me feel more secure. I considered the possibility that maybe I was just a control freak. While I'd been running my parents' bookstore, a few employees had jokingly accused me of this. At least, I was pretty sure they'd been joking. But maybe not.
With a warm summer breeze ruffling the sheer curtains covering the bedroom windows, Cole and I soon began kissing, and I decided to simply let all thoughts of trust and possible impending attacks go for the night. And, like Cassie had said it was, I found that just letting go felt pretty freeing.
Several weeks passed fairly uneventfully. The hot, humid days of July turned into the even hotter, increasingly humid days of August. Cole got Commander Miller to agree to let Katie remain in New Bad Axe indefinitely. Cassie and I were thrilled, as was another young woman in the village who'd recently learned she was pregnant. However, probably no one was more thrilled than Katie. Quickly making good friends with Mary-Alice, as well as many other women in the community, she frequently spoke about having a new lease on life. I kind of knew the feeling. In my life before I'd arrived New Bad Axe, I'd never dreamed I could be as happy as I was currently. Cole was a huge part of that, and our baby and the good friends I'd made in the village were also parts of that.
However, always hanging above my happiness like a cloud heavy with rain was the possibility of Bennett and his men attacking. Curiously, once they'd set up their encampment across Lake Huron, they hadn't advanced further to the shore or made any other moves to indicate that an attack was imminent. I had to wonder if they knew they were being watched, but Cole said that they really didn't appear to know. He was pretty sure that if they did, they would have tried to kill his scouts and spies by this point, and they hadn't.
Cole also said that he wished he'd have a prophetic dream about if, when, and under what circumstances Bennett and his men might attack. However, since his dreams about me had ended, he hadn't had a single psychic dream about anything. Which really wasn't that surprising, because throughout his life, his psychic dreams came and went, with years passing between each series of them sometimes. It was disappointing, though, maybe even more to me than Cole. Having a date of when Bennett would attack would have gone a long way toward assuring me that all the fighters in New Bad Axe would be completely prepared.