Ashes

by P. M. Briede

  “Uptight Charlotte,” Paige answered. “This whole mess has made her forget how to cut loose and have a little fun. You’d think since she inspires it in the rest of us, she’d come by it a little more naturally. Aren’t muses supposed to be free spirits or something?” Was she joking or just out of her damn mind! By this point, it wasn’t just sober Olivier who had picked up on my annoyance. Wesley was well aware and was trying to rein Paige in. Tristan, seeing Wesley’s failures, attempted to give him some assistance. “Good Lord, guys, can no one take a joke anymore? It’s not like I was going to tell Wesley Charlotte found him immensely more sexually desirable than Olivier.”

  I thought I was going to choke on my own tongue! Paige’s hand lashed out into the evening air trying to grab the words back before they found their way to all our ears. But she’d said them. Jerking my hand out of Wesley’s, it immediately balled into a fist. Unable to look Olivier or Wesley in the eyes, I grabbed a bottle of wine out of the basket of food and stormed off. I heard footsteps following swiftly behind me and quickened my pace, calling a warning over my shoulder. “Unless you want a fight, I suggest to whomever you are that you stay away from me!”

  In my mortified retreat from my friends, all I’d taken with me was the bottle of wine. I had no phone, no food, and no flashlight. I reached my destination off the last lingering light from the setting sun but soon found myself with only the moon and the stars for company. Though the night was a clear one, the moon was a crescent so there wasn’t much light to speak of. Oh, well. I could happily spend the night in the sanctuary I’d run too. It just sucked because I was actually hungry.

  I wasn’t there long before my name was said in a hesitant voice. I should have known he’d be the one to find me. Looking down, I saw an extra shadow stretching out into the night, illuminated by the light from the flashlight in his hand.

  “They weren’t joking when they said she’d be in a tree!” Paige exclaimed. They must have asked my parents where I’d go. “For God’s sake Charlotte, what are you doing up there?” The effort to sound casual about having to search me out was evident in Paige’s tone. She was trying to slip back into our old roles. The old Charlotte would have quickly forgiven her and not required a search party.

  But I wasn’t the old Charlotte anymore. “You have a phone, Wesley?” I called down to him. He assured me he did. “Paige, take the flashlight and go back to the house. I’ll be fine in the morning but I’m not right now.”

  “Charlotte, I’m soooo sorry. I don’t know what came over me…”

  “Bullshit! We both know what came over you.” I paused to take a deep breath. “Alcohol and a meddlesome nature! You can’t understand why the choice between them is difficult for me. You humiliated me in front of the people I respect and love most. You demeaned Olivier and you reminded Wesley and Olivier that there hadn’t been that much time between them when I’d taken them as lovers. Plus you outright lied, Paige!” I heard a gasp but I wasn’t sure who it came from. It could have been from them both. “I never said one was immensely better than the other.”

  She made one last attempt to apologize, but I was committed to remaining angry until the sun came up again. Besides, I now owed Wesley and Olivier apologies and explanations and Paige didn’t need to be there for them. Wesley was the one who stopped her, ordering her to do as I had requested.

  “She’s gone,” his voice floated out in the night after a few minutes. “It’s safe to come down.” I didn’t immediately move to descend, staring at the wine bottle. Climbing the tree with it in the fading light had been hard enough. The reverse might actually be impossible. Could I leave it here? “Or, if you’d rather stay up there, I’d be happy to come up.”

  I considered his offer for a moment. I was actually reclining in the bough of two bald cypress trees that had melded together. There was plenty of room for two, but this tree was difficult to climb. There were no lower branches but pockets in the truck. It was more like rock climbing than tree climbing and glancing back down at Wesley, I saw him coming to that same realization. “Charlotte, the phone’s not going to give you the light you need to get down.” I was probably about fifteen to twenty feet off the ground. But if I didn’t have to worry about the wine bottle, I should be able to manage.

  “You think you can catch the bottle if I drop it?” I asked. “If not it’s okay, I’ll just leave it here and get it sometime tomorrow.”

  “I can barely see you. If you want to spare the bottle a grisly demise than you should leave it in the tree.” I laughed at Wesley’s description, settled the wine in a hollow, and kicked a leg over the side. My progression down was slow as I couldn’t rely on my eyes to find my foot and hand holds. His hands on my calves told me I was at least within catching distance if I fell. “I’ve got you, Charlotte. Do you want to just fall back?” The dim light of the moon and stars outlined the corporeal shadow that was Wesley. He must have made out my own shadow, figuring I’d looked down at him. His arm grazed along my legs until it met with my knees. “I’ll catch you now, but if you can get a little lower it’ll probably be safer.” After I maneuvered through a few more holds his hands found my waist and pulled me away from the tree.

  I’d expected to be set me on my feet. Instead, Wesley shifted his arms and jostled me into a cradle hold. “Ah, there’s my little wood nymph. I’ve missed you, you know?” In the darkness, his forehead still found mine easily.

  With nothing to focus on other than him, all of his attributes overwhelmed my senses. I got drunk off his smell, the stars reflected from my eyes to his, his arms were strong and held me close, and the hammering of his heart beat a rapid rhythm against my body. His exhalations fell heavy on my cheek and the tip of his nose brushed along mine. When his voice caressed my name I almost forgot about the rest of world. Ready to completely give in to him, I was yanked back into reality by a sudden flash of light that I caught out the corner of my eye. Automatically my head snapped to get a better look that alerted Wesley. “What is it, Charlotte?”

  “Shhhh. I saw something.” I struggled to get out of his arms and he reluctantly put me down.

  Focused on trying to find the light again I took a few steps away from Wesley, searching the darkness. The only light to be seen was above me though. Before I could get too far his hand caught mine and attempted to pull me back to him. “There’s nothing there,” he observed. His hand was working its way up my arm, delicately following the tremor heralding its path. Placing the other at my tailbone, he moved it along the lines of my hip not resting until it found my stomach with his chest flush to my back. The nearness of him washed away my commitment to searching out the light and I sank back into him. His head nudged mine to the side, elongating my neck. Just before the lids of my eyes slid closed to enjoy the feel of his lips against the sensitive hollows, the light flashed again followed by a snap that sounded like someone stepping on a tree branch.

  I bolted away from Wesley and raced towards where the light had been. “Didn’t you see it? Didn’t you hear that?” I called over my shoulder. I didn’t stop until I stumbled and fell to the ground.

  Within seconds Wesley was kneeling beside me. “There’s nothing there!” Wesley spat in frustration. “Can we stop this madness, please?”

  “You think I’m concocting this? I know what I saw and heard, Wesley! Someone is out there.” I resented his doubts.

  “You know that’s not what I meant. I believe you think you are seeing something. But I didn’t need Cheval to tell me you haven’t been taking good care of yourself lately. You’re pale. You’ve lost weight. You’re practically skeletal!”

  I turned away from the empty night to glare at him. “What the hell does all that have to do with whether or not you believe I saw something?” It hurt that he didn’t trust me in this.

  “The evidence you haven’t been sleeping is everywhere, love. It’s in your eyes, your posture…”

  “Are you freaking kidding me, right now? I’m worried to death about you!”
My voice was raised and it echoed through the trees.

  With a deep breath Wesley kept his voice from rising to match mine. “As I am of you and for more than just your health. Aren’t we on the outskirts of your parents’ property, along the edge of the woods?” Looking around, at only God knew what, he continued, “And if I’m not mistaken aren’t we closer to the guest-house than the plantation?”

  Wesley was right and I now knew where he was going. My cypress tree was within a couple hundred feet of the guest-house. The one the Wyatt’s and their Secret Service were staying in. The light and snap I heard could have been an agent on patrol. Dropping my head onto Wesley’s shoulder, I surrendered. “I’m sorry. Everything has me on edge right now. This crap with Paige. Abigail’s going to be here tomorrow. You have that meeting on Sunday. Then you’re flying away again. I don’t know. I’m not really built for this kind of pressure and stress. Paige and you have the intense jobs, making important and weighty decisions. Until the last couple of years, I’ve only ever been a glorified housewife.” Even I could hear the sadness in my own voice.

  He locked me within the strength of his arms and kissed my forehead. “Don’t say that. You have always been more than a housewife. You’re an inspiration and not just because of what you are. You inspire me. You inspire Cheval. You’ve figured out things Paige, Cheval, Tristan, and I never would have seen. You fended off and survived a brutal attack on your life and successfully put those animals in prison for the rest of theirs. You’ve held up under extreme conditions.” He meant every word he’d said and despite the fact that I didn’t feel very strong or brave at the moment, I did feel better. “It’s late. I’ll walk you back.”

  After seeing me safely home Wesley borrowed my dad’s Mule to get him back to the guest-house. Before he left he grazed a kiss along the back of my hand. “Take care of yourself,” he said. I repeated the words.

  Upon entering my old bedroom, I found Olivier, still awake, reading a book while reclining in the bed. “There you are, carissime. I kind of figured you’d end up with me tonight.” Paige had fallen asleep on the couch. I guessed while waiting for me to get back. I’d sent Tristan down to get her. “Where did you run off to?” Olivier asked. I gave him the very short version as I went through my evening routine and changed into my pajamas in the bathroom. I was exhausted and knew he would understand. When I returned to the room my pillow was already nestled against his shoulder as he laid there with open arms. I crawled into bed and curled up into his side.

  I’d hoped to fall asleep right away. But I couldn’t until I addressed the elephant in the room. “Olivier, I’m sorry about what Paige said.”

  “Why are you sorry?” he interjected. “You’re not the one who said it.”

  “Well, I kind of did. It was something she’d made me compare when she thought she was being helpful to me with the decision between the two of you.” Olivier shifted uncomfortably beside me and I knew it wasn’t from the position of his body, or mine. When I placed my hand on his heart he quickly covered it with his own. “But what Paige said wasn’t the complete truth. I never said one of you was immensely better than the other. I said there were aspects of each of you that were…”

  “You don’t need to explain yourself to me, especially not now,” Olivier cut me off. “I’m content with our current status so whether you found me or him the better lover doesn’t matter. If there is ever anything I can do to bring you more satisfaction or happiness, you know all you ever have to do is ask. Otherwise, let’s drop this.” The arm around my back secured me closer to his side and I sighed. “I love you, Charlotte.”

  “Love you too,” I responded groggily before drifting off to the Land of Nod.

  Chapter 12

  “You look beautiful,” I told Paige as I zipped her into her wedding dress. I peeked over her shoulder to see the full effect in the mirror. She was in a strapless, silk-satin, fitted dress with a one-shouldered silk chiffon overlay. The draping and style was Greek inspired with a slight layering effect in the skirt. I finished the outfit with a beaded belt that cinched in her waist. We’d gathered her hair in the back with elaborate braids and twists giving a haphazard appearance that had been anything but. She’d wanted red lips so the rest of her make-up was soft. Tristan might die at the altar.

  With her ready to go, she slipped my beaded belt around the waistline of my dress and buckled it in the back for me. Then I went to check on Olivier. When he didn’t answer my knock I opened the door. My jaw dropped at the sight of him. His tie was hanging around his neck as if he’d been in the process of knotting it. Otherwise he was dressed in the navy suit and lavender shirt I’d picked out for him. I’m not sure why but I reached out to complete his look by tying his tie. Smiling, he lifted his chin in silent acquiescence.

  Though I was focused on the tie, I was aware of the way Olivier was peering down his nose to gaze at me. The familiar flames were blazing in his green eyes. Why had I ever found their presence disturbing? They now brought me great comfort. If I ever had to go a day unable to witness and appreciate their graceful dance, I’m not sure what I’d do. Patting the knot and smoothing the tie, I looked up at him with a smile. He leaned down to kiss my cheek before whispering in my ear. “You steal my breath, Charlotte. You’d have started wars that would have made the one over Helen look a mere skirmish.”

  My hands caught his as I returned the kiss to his cheek. I understood his reference and knew the style of my own dress had conjured its imagery. I too was in a silk-satin strapless dress with a Greek inspired silk-chiffon overlay. However, mine was gathered around the beaded neckline that appeared more like a wide necklace but actually held the dress together. My belt produced an empire-waistline and from there the material flowed as diaphanous folds to just below my knees. I wore no other jewelry. My make-up was natural and understated except for my eyes that were shadowed a deep amethyst to match my dress and highlight their emerald color. My hair was free in wild, untamed curls.

  “Would you have been a warrior fighting for my body or my heart?”

  His pupils disappeared, consumed by the flames, until his eyes were white with passion. The grip on my hands was borderline painful as Olivier fought against his instincts to lock us up in the room, skipping the wedding altogether. “Truthfully, it would have been a war to possess your body and hold you as a trophy,” he paused for effect, “at first. But much like our relationship now, you’d have melted my heart and I would have become a slave to your whims for any miniscule affection.”

  The heat from his skin transferred to mine and I was surprised the room wasn’t burning. I turned and headed for the door, breaking the intense hold his eyes had on mine. When I tripped over my own feet his arms caught me before I could fall. “You feeling well, Charlotte? You seem to have become clumsier lately.”

  I waved off his concern with a hand. But I did take a moment to gather myself, clearing my head while I used him to steady me. “I’m fine. I think I have a head cold or something. I’ve been feeling a little nauseous and my mind has been a little cloudy but nothing more. It does seem to be throwing off my equilibrium of late, though.”

  I hadn’t lied to him. He’d have known even without the confirmation of looking directly into my eyes but my explanation didn’t put Olivier at ease. “If you’ve been sick you should have said something. You have to start taking better care of yourself. I know you’re worried about everyone and everything but we need you in top condition. So don’t get mad at me but I’m going to start being more insistent about your meals and sleep schedules. Tracto?” Deal? He challenged with a crafty smile.

  When I agreed to his terms we went to the wedding. At the barn Olivier broke off with Colter and Deacon to take his seat. As I stepped inside I was frightened by the shadow that materialized from the steps and would have fallen if Paige hadn’t reached out and grabbed my arm. “Jesus, Wesley! You almost gave me a heart attack.” Glaring at him, I demanded, “What are you doing here anyway? You’re supposed to be
with Tristan.”

  Paige had an eyebrow quirked at him as well, so she hadn’t known he was going to be here either. He offered a sheepish grin and ran a hand through his hair. “Ah, well, Cheval texted and asked if I’d accompany you down the aisle. I didn’t understand why at first but since you can’t seem to stay on your feet, I do now.”

  Good grief! They were acting as though I was the one drunk today! “I am perfectly capable of walking to the gazebo on my own, thank you very much! Olivier is just hyper sensitive for some reason. I have a minor cold. I’m not going to face plant or anything.” My tirade might have been more believable if I hadn’t again tripped over a rock on the floor of the barn. Damn it, what the hell was wrong with me?! Normally my dancing skills afforded me a little more grace. “Paige, tell him I’ll be fine.” The strength in my words from before was absent from my request because, after watching me almost fall twice now, I knew she wouldn’t.

  And she didn’t disappoint which is how I found myself walking to the gazebo on Wesley’s arm. “Don’t look so miffed. No one wants to see you get that beautiful dress dirty,” he whispered in my ear. “Besides it’s nice to be able to be the one to look out for you for once, even if I’m protecting you from yourself.”

  “Ha, ha, Mr. Breaux.” My irritation at the situation I’m sure aided the farce we now had to act out since Abigail, Alexander, Regina, and a few other campaign people were looking at us. We couldn’t look cozy. In fact, we should look like we were only tolerating the company of the other for our friend’s sake.

  We’d reached the altar without incident and I was composing my retort to them all when I slipped on a leaf as I was breaking away from Wesley to take my spot. I’d have gone down if not for his arm to cling to and steadying hand at my back. With a grateful glance and grimace, I nodded when I was set with no plans to take any more steps without him or Olivier for the rest of the day. Wesley chuckled and went to stand beside Tristan to await Paige.