No Regrets: Jani Kay (Firebird Trilogy Book 2)

by Jani Kay

  “So this is the reason you sent Maxwell and Chloe out. Not because I had a chance of winning you back.”

  She nodded, a deep frown marring her forehead. I closed my eyes and pinched the bridge of my nose as I considered my reply.

  Rebecca’s earlier words stuck in my mind. Listen to your gut. It knows the answers better than your heart or mind. It was starting to make sense. The right answer came from a place of strength. Finally, I understood what she meant, but I also had to be true to myself. If everything we’d been through was a lesson, it was time I learned.

  I opened my eyes, searching for hers. It almost looked as if she were holding her breath. I shook my head. “I can't do that and it not be a lie. I don’t understand it...it's the strangest sensation. When I'm around Chloe, my world lights up. I've pushed it aside up till now, focusing on fixing my mistake with you. There is something...inexplicable. All I can say is...Chloe messes with my head.”

  Rebecca’s lips drew to a thin line. She narrowed her eyes, studying my face. “So you won’t promise me?”

  “Cherie, if you don’t want me, I don’t understand why you won’t let me explore where things could lead with Chloe.”

  Her eyes blazed. The fire was back. “Could it be because you’re a man who’s thinking with his dick? You may be exploring, but what if you break Chloe’s heart. I can't stand by and watch it happen. I've already caused one of my sisters harm because of my inaction. I'm not letting that happen again.”

  Hands in pockets, I paced the room before coming to lean against the fireplace. “Rebecca, that’s ridiculous. What happened to Lily is completely different to this. There is no comparison. Besides, weren’t you the one to agree with me that you were the only one who could decide about us? The same applies to Chloe, my dear. It's up to her.”

  “Don’t hurt her, Alain. She would never have crossed your path if it weren’t for knowing me.”

  I crossed my ankles as I rested my elbow on the mantle. “It's not your responsibility nor your burden.” I rubbed my chin. “What if it turns out to be exactly what Chloe and I need. You would be the catalyst of something wonderful. Have you thought of it like that?”

  Her eyes widened. She shook her head. “No. All I'm thinking of is avoiding damage. Wouldn’t it be strange though...to be with Chloe after...us?” She cocked her head sideways, waiting for my reply.

  I frowned. “Chloe is not you. If your fear is that I'd be fooling myself to believe she can replace you, that’s not true. I see her for who she is, independent of you.” I placed my hand over my heart. “Looks are only one part of the attraction. It’s what lies inside that counts most.”

  “Well, see, then this conversation isn’t wasted. Chloe has admitted her attraction to you—not that a blind person couldn’t see it.” She shrugged, exasperated. “I just...I want her to be as happy as I am. For her to find the right man for her.” Her eyes bored into mine. “Is it you? I don’t know.”

  I let out a long breath. “Neither do I. At the moment, I have a lot going on. I need to clear my name—sort out things before I can think of a new beginning. I will go from here and do that first before I pursue any other woman. You have my word. I hope it's enough to set your mind at rest.”

  This conversation was nothing like I'd expected, but one good thing came from it. I was pointing in a new direction. Although it was without Rebecca, I had hope that love was somewhere on the horizon for me. Because I wanted that. I wanted happiness. A family. A woman who loved me above all else.

  Rebecca glanced at her watch and pushed up from the sofa. “It's getting dark. I need to find Maxwell. I'm sure he’s stewing in his skin. I need to tell him how much I do love him. I wish you well, Alain. I hope you can find happiness.”

  I kissed her on both cheeks, melancholy settling in my heart. This was goodbye. I finally got it.

  Chapter 44 — Rebecca

  I couldn’t be happier—under the circumstances, of course. We still had things to sort out, but as far as the people who mattered most in my life were concerned, things were turning out well. Lily was out of danger and out of hospital. She had a man who was falling for her, a good man who would take care of her like she deserved. Chloe, well, she was just Chloe, strong, independent and a woman who went after what she wanted. If she’d made up her mind about Alain, I was almost more scared for him than for her.

  And Maxwell had told me he loved me. I'd been waiting for those words, and since he’d said them, I kept repeating it over and over in my head like a lovesick schoolgirl, basking in the glow it brought to my being. I couldn’t help smiling like a fool, and I was sure I even smiled in my sleep.

  We started out fucking and ended up making love. It was sweet and tender, slow and hot. Beautiful. I never want it to end. Never wanted to wake up from this dream I was in.

  Since Maxwell had arrived in Germany, we’d hardly been apart. Besides the times he excused himself and went off to the downstairs study to take care of business, we spent most of our days in one another’s company. It couldn’t last. At some point, the harsh reality of normal life would claim us both and we’d have to get back to routine, work and the outside world, but for the time being, I was content living in my bubble.

  I woke up with a hand caressing softly over my skin, and fingertips brushing over the crests of my nipples. Feeling them respond to the touch even though my brain wasn’t on board yet, he chuckled softly as I yawned and stretched out. Somewhere between sleep and waking, I moaned softly and gave my body to him willingly. He took his time, exploring every inch of my skin with lips, hands, and fingers.

  Arching my back, I pushed my mound into the hand now settled between my legs. It wasn’t possible to be turned on this much, yet one touch of his fingertips feathering over my smooth pussy had my legs falling open, waiting for his magic touch to ignite the fire inside me that would never burn out.

  He slid down my body, pushing my legs further apart, opening my core to him. My heartbeat sped up, knowing what was next. I clutched the sheets in my fists...waiting.

  One long swipe of his tongue over my clit and I knew this was the way I wanted to wake every morning. “Hmmm,” he hummed from between my legs, “what a beautiful morning when my baby is wet for me already.” His stubble scraped along the tender flesh of my inner thighs, reminding me where he’d been for most of the night. The mixture of pain and pleasure was exquisite. I would never tire of having Max own my pussy in any way he wanted.

  “Max,” I groaned, clawing the sheets tighter as he ate me like a starving man. Good God, I didn’t think I was capable of another orgasm after the multiple times I'd come during the night, yet my body responded to every lick, suck and flick he lavished on me.

  “God, you taste good,” he mumbled, as he lifted my legs onto his shoulders. Legs trembling, he fucked me with his tongue until I screamed his name and spiraled into yet another orgasm.

  “You’ll wake everyone in the house,” he chuckled as he came up. I didn’t care. I wanted everyone to know.

  He grabbed hold of his beautiful cock, pumped it twice, and settled it at my entrance. “Oh, God, fuck me, Max,” I urged, needing the friction to finish what he’d started. My legs gripped around his waist and pulled him closer, greedy for his cock. Holding on to his biceps, I pushed back as hard as he thrust into me.

  This was where we belonged. Together. A perfect fit, made for one another.

  He leaned in and kissed me, the musky scent and taste of myself on his lips.

  “I love you, baby, so fucking much,” he said as he broke the kiss.

  Our eyes locked.

  “I love you, too, Max.”

  “Don’t ever run again. Promise me.”

  “I won’t. I want to be with you. Always.”

  Silence.

  “Marry me.”

  “Yes.”

  “Yes?”

  “Yes.”

  “Oh fuck, come, baby. Now.”

  “Oh, Max, yes.”

  He fucked me. Ha
rd. Fast. Urgent.

  Chests heaving. Panting.

  Our souls entwined, becoming one.

  Chapter 45 — Maxwell

  My heart sang. She said yes.

  The best day of my life. Nothing could top this. Nothing.

  “Baby, you make me so happy.”

  “I’m happy, too, Max.”

  “Mrs. Rebecca Grant. I like it.”

  “Me, too.”

  I buried my face in her hair, inhaling her so she became part of my DNA. I pulled out of her slowly, the warm sticky liquid oozing out and running down her thigh. I’d fucked her raw and now it was time to clean her up. I scooped her up in my arms and carried her to the shower.

  She was going to be my wife. This time it was real.

  No more running, she promised. Thank fuck for that.

  I set her down on the counter while I turned the water on and waited for the temperature to adjust. She watched me from under her lashes, her lips swollen and her hair tangled in that just-fucked way I adored. She had a glow about her that melted my heart.

  I stole yet another kiss while we waited, cupping her breasts in my hands, their weight just perfect in my palms.

  “Let’s get you clean before my cock has other plans.”

  She laughed. “Surely not? Haven’t you had enough yet?”

  “Baby, I can never get enough of you. If I fuck you every day for the rest of my life, that still wouldn’t be enough.”

  “Hmmm...such a greedy boy,” she teased.

  “Only for you, Rebecca.”

  I swept her off the counter and stepped into the generous shower cubicle, ready to take care of her. I soaped her body and washed her hair, kissing her skin, mouth, and pussy as I went. She relished in my attention, giving me access to every part of her.

  Once I was satisfied that we were both refreshed, I turned the faucets off and wrapped a towel around my waist before drying her body in the biggest fluffy towel I could find. I dried her hair in a smaller towel, before wrapping it high on her head. I loved that she allowed me to take care of her in such an intimate way.

  “Max, shall I ask the staff to bring breakfast to the balcony? It's so lovely outside.”

  “Yes, my love. Do that while I dry off.”

  She disappeared into the bedroom, giving me time to shave. I didn’t want to cause the sensitive skin between her legs further damage than I’d already done, because there was no way in hell I wouldn’t crave her taste again later. I smiled at my image in the mirror. All these years of waiting had been worth every second now I had her. I hummed a tune as I shaved, unable to keep the joy hidden inside.

  With only a towel wrapped around my waist, I made my way into the bedroom, whistling an upbeat tune. I stilled in the doorway. Rebecca had turned on the television. On the screen was none other than a rerun of the interview with Natasha. Fuck.

  Fuck.

  Rebecca turned to me, her large eyes wider than usual. Her skin was drained of all color, the glow gone. “Maxwell, have you seen this?” Her voice had a freaked-out edge to it.

  There was no point in lying. My Adam’s apple bobbed in my throat as I swallowed hard and nodded, not taking my eyes off hers.

  “Why didn’t you tell me?” Her voice softened to a whisper. “Natasha is pregnant. Oh, God, Maxwell.” She closed her eyes and dropped her head into her hands.

  “Baby.” My head swam and my heart beat so hard in my chest I felt it thrumming in my ears. This was so fucked up.

  “Don’t call me baby. You knew about this and still asked me to marry you.”

  I did.

  I rushed to her and took her hands in mine. “It hasn’t been confirmed yet. My people are working on it. I didn’t want to alarm you until I had all the facts. It's possible it's a scam. That she’s trying to trap me.”

  She sucked in a breath. “Does that also mean that it is possible it's your child?”

  Fuck.

  I nodded. “There is a slim chance. Depends how far along she is...if she’s pregnant at all.”

  “You slept with her recently?”

  “Weeks ago. I’m a man, baby. That was before we had our talk—before I told you everything about the contract. She was home from work. I was horny and frustrated. It happened.”

  “Max, what are we going to do?”

  “First, we establish paternity. If it happens to be mine I’ll do my duty by taking financial care of her and the child.”

  She sucked in a breath. “Are you serious? Are you willing to let your child grow up without a father—like you did?”

  “This doesn’t change anything between us, Rebecca. The contract with Natasha is void.” Christ, everything was falling apart. Rebecca was freaking out more than I expected. I couldn’t let Natasha win and ruin this like she intended. It was fucking ridiculous.

  “You said yes. You said you wouldn’t run. You promised.”

  She lifted her chin, her lips quivering. “That was before this.”

  I smashed my fist into the wall. Pictures rattled in protest.

  If Rebecca ran again...

  Fear was turning both of us into irrational lunatics. We had to stop.

  “Fuck, Rebecca. You can't leave me,” I roared. “Let’s not go through that again. I'm marrying you. Natasha is bluffing. And if she is pregnant, chances are it isn’t mine. Don’t make this harder than it needs to be.”

  Her eyes widened. “I'm making it harder? I love you, Max, no matter what happens. But you have a few things to take care of before you are in a position to marry me.”

  My stomach dropped. “Rebecca, there is something you need to understand. Even if Natasha is pregnant...even if the baby is mine...even if you leave me...there is no way in hell I can marry Natasha or be with her any longer. Only one woman has captured my heart. If I can't be with you—”

  “Max, please.” Tears filled her eyes. She closed them—shutting me out.

  “So your promise...it means nothing?”

  I sucked in a ragged breath. My eyebrows drew together as cold sweat broke out on my skin. I clenched my teeth. Get a grip, Max. Rebecca isn’t Marianne. Images of a little fatherless boy—me—abandoned by his mother, flashed before me. My heart twisted, aching like hell.

  She didn’t hesitate. She opened her eyes, her lashes glimmering with her tears.

  “It means everything. It means I’m not going anywhere, Max. I will stand by you through this. It means we’ll find out what Natasha’s game is. Together, we’ll find a solution.”

  A smile threatened to twist her lips. I stared at her mouth, letting her words sink in.

  My voice choked. “Thank you. I can't risk losing you. It will break me.” I buried my head between her breasts, breathing her in.

  She pulled me closer, stroking my head gently. “I know. Me, too.” Her breath hitched. “I love you so much it hurts.” She rubbed my back in large soothing circles until my breathing calmed.

  “How soon will you know about the baby...if it's yours?” she asked softly.

  I pulled away and straightened up. Taking her hands in mine I pressed them together. “My lawyers are talking to her about having a paternity test done. It can be performed at the end of the first trimester. As early as the twelfth week of pregnancy if the mother is willing to have in vitro testing completed.”

  “Is Natasha willing to undergo the procedure?”

  “It's invasive. She may refuse to have it done...but we are working on it.”

  Her bottom lip quivered. “Oh, God, what does that mean?”

  My heart squeezed in my chest. “In that case it means we won’t know until the child is born. There are other tests that can be performed at that time that don’t carry any risk.”

  “So it's a waiting game then?” She blinked a few times, moisture gathering in her eyes.

  I groaned like a wounded bull. “I can't wait that long for you to marry me, Rebecca. Please. I've never begged for anything in my fucking life. Not even when I was a kid, but I'm begging you, plea
se don’t stop loving me because of this.”

  A small smile twisted the corners of her beautiful mouth. “Oh Max, I‘ll never stop loving you. That’s not possible. You are everything to me. Can't you tell?”

  My voice was hoarse. “I thought I could. Until this...it’s fucked up...just as we find one another. My only fear is losing you.”

  She went quiet for a while, biting her bottom lip as she pondered my words. Tears brimmed in her eyes, glistening on the tips of her lashes until they became too heavy and smashed to her cheeks.

  “You can't lose me, Max. I’m not going anywhere.”

  This should be the happiest time in my life. Fucking Natasha. She was going to pay for this bullshit. “I never dreamed when I helped the young and innocent Natasha to fame and fortune that she’d turn on me like this.”

  “She must have real feelings for you, Max. She wouldn’t fight for you if she didn’t. She wants you back, so she’s using whatever means she can to do that.”

  “Fuck that,” I snarled. “All my fucking life I've done the right thing by others. Where did it get me? Tiny nearly killed me—if it wasn’t for Ryder saving my life. I helped Natasha climb to stardom. Without me, she’d be another washed up wannabe, probably doing porn movies to pay the fucking rent. And she repays me like this? Fuck no!”

  Chapter 46 — Rebecca

  The hurt I’d felt before paled in comparison with the possibility of giving up Maxwell. Just when I'd found the man I wanted in my life forever...this happened.

  I'd run anywhere with him. Give up everything I owned or wanted just to be his.

  This man...I loved him so completely I would sacrifice anything for him. What he didn’t understand, was that giving him up to Natasha—if that was what he chose—would kill me.

  I’m willing to do it for him, if that’s what he wants.

  As a child, Maxwell grew up without knowing a father until he’d been adopted in his teenage years. He knew better than anyone how it impacted on a child. He'd spent hours telling me about those years, how heartbroken he’d been. That he never wished it on any child. Little did he know then his worst fear could come to fruition.