“Wanna come over to my place? Maybe watch a movie? Order some takeout?” his voice sounded so hopeful and I hated to say no, but I was tired and my feet really hurt from standing all night.
“I was going to go home and take a hot bath,” I glanced up at him before beginning to walk to the stockroom. I guess I should have thought better of it. Jeff had no intention of letting me off the hook that easy. He followed me, and when I stopped abruptly at the door, he crashed right into my back.
“Sorry,” he hissed as he grabbed my arm to keep me from falling forward.
“Um,” I stammered before twisting the knob of the door, rushing in to get my coat, and then scurrying back out as I rushed to put it on. I watched his face as he swallowed a few times while he stared at me. Someone had spilled their drink on me not long ago, and my shirt was clinging to me where it was wet. Even though it was black, you could see an imprint of my bra. Jeff tried to hide it, but he’d been staring at me all night.
“Zip your coat up, Lena,” his voice dipped low. It wasn’t menacing, but it was a warning. “I’m trying to do the right thing here. You said no, and I respect that, but right now all I want to do is peel that off of you.”
I nodded as I fumbled with the zipper. I chewed my lip to keep from saying something because despite the fact that he made me nervous, he also made part of me want him. Once I got the zipper up, I tipped my head back so I could look him in the eyes. Something clicked in me at that moment. It told me he was so far beyond any man I’d ever known. He was what I dreamed about when I was just a little girl. A man that was fiercely loyal, unafraid of danger, would protect me forsaking himself in the process, and would go to any means necessary to keep his word.
We stood there in the hallway staring at one another for a few beats before he released a resigned sigh and turned to leave. I let him take a few steps before my confidence rose to the surface, and I chased after him. Without saying a word, I followed him outside. We turned toward the parking lot, and I grabbed onto his hand, causing him to halt.
“I would never hurt you. You have to know that,” he laced our fingers together.
“I know,” I whispered. “Just make me forget him.”
“I don’t know if I can, but I sure as hell would like to try,” he vowed as he led me over to his Mustang. He opened the door, and ushered me in. I sank down into the leather seats and closed my eyes. Was I ready for this?
ooooooooo
Jeff
What the hell was I thinking? Taking her to my place? Agreeing to help her forget? Every part of me was strung so tight that one more moment like the ones we just shared, and I’d snap. My muscles were tensed and my heart racing, but on the outside no one would notice. I was trained to hide this sort of thing, and at the moment that was working in my favor. If she knew just a tiny bit of what I felt, she’d run in the other direction. Hell, I was ready to run. This need to be with her, to save her, to make her forget… it was ruling me at the moment, and if I didn’t learn to chill the fuck out it was going to ruin this before it started.
We rode to my place in silence. I mentally talked myself off the ledge while she sent a text to her sister telling her not to worry. I knew Megan had moved in, and it seemed like they were closer than ever before. I’m guessing that Lena didn’t let her sister out of her sight now, and I’m sure being here with me was causing her to worry about what Megan would do home alone. “Everything ok?” I turned the car off and paused before getting out.
“Mmhm,” she nodded as she stuffed her cell into her purse. “She’s probably not going to get my message until morning. She’s usually asleep by now. We both are,” she murmured. “I mean,” she was fisting her hands together in her lap as she squirmed in her seat. “I don’t know what I mean.”
“Relax,” I reached over and clasped her hand. “I’m gonna order some food, and you’re going to take a hot bath, and then we’re going to watch a movie. Ok?” I smiled as I removed my keys from the ignition, and opened my door. I rounded the back of the car and came over to her door, opening it to help her out.
“I like Chinese takeout,” she bit her lip as she looked up at me. She giggled a little as I chuckled. “Thought it might narrow down your choices.”
“Moo shu pork and fried rice it is,” I just rambled off what I’d ordered the last time hoping that it might be something she liked, but when she respond with ‘that’s my favorite’, I was floored.
Once inside my apartment, I grabbed a clean towel and led Lena to the master bath. “Take as long as you like. I don’t have any fancy soaps,” I grimaced and she blushed as she scanned the room. “Here’s a fresh towel. I’ll order the food.” I sounded like a teenager rambling on as I backed out of the bathroom. I needed to get away from her, and let her lock the door. Knowing she was in here naked, bathing, was going to be pure torture. She smiled as she held the towel to her chest, “Thank you.” I nodded and closed the door, effectively separating us.
ooooooooo
Lena
When Jeff left the room, I rushed to turn the water on in his tub. His bathroom was beautiful. I’d been to his place before, but never ventured this far. I was surprised it didn’t faze me to walk through his bedroom, or come into the bath at all.
While the water heated up, I took the opportunity to snoop. I didn’t want to, but I couldn’t help myself. He wanted me to trust him, so knowing everything I could would help…right? I flipped open the medicine cabinet, but nothing was out of the ordinary. Some floss, a comb, mouthwash, aspirin, and a box of Band-Aids. Next I opened the cabinet under the sink, and that’s where I stopped. Sitting in the back corner was a black metal box. It had a lock on it. I shut the cabinet, and scolded myself for being nosy. I shouldn’t have been under there, and now the contents of that locked box were going to bother me all night.
Steam was beginning to fill the room at this point, so I quickly undressed, and climbed in the tub. The water felt heavenly, and as I sank down in it I couldn’t help but sigh in relief. The box was pushed from my mind, and I relaxed back as I let the water fill all the way to my chin. I must have fallen asleep because what only felt like moments later had been long enough for the water to cool. “You ok in there?” Jeff’s voice held concern as he knocked on the door.
“Yeah. I’ll be finished in a minute. I’m sorry,” I called out as I shivered.
“Food will be here any minute.”
“I’ll be right out,” I reached for the faucet to warm the water back up, and then grabbed Jeff’s body wash. It smelled like him, and I inhaled it when I squirted some on a washcloth.
After using his razor to shave, and rinsing off, I climbed from the tub and wrapped myself in the towel he’d given me. It was hard not to want to snuggle into him. I was surrounded by everything that was him. His bathroom held all the scents that I smelled whenever he was around, and when I glanced at the sink, I noticed a t-shirt sitting on the counter. I hadn’t even seen him set it there. He must have put it down when he gave me the towel. Underneath it was a pair of sweats.
I couldn’t help grinning when I looked at my reflection in the mirror. The shirt and sweats were CPD issued blues and practically swallowed me whole. Jeff was tall, but I never realized how tall until his shirt hung to almost my knees. I rolled the pant legs up to keep from tripping over them as I slowly opened the bathroom door. A cool breeze blew over me as the steam whooshed out. I shuffled down the hallway, letting my nose guide me as Chinese takeout filled the air, replacing the smell of Jeff’s soap. I’d have been upset if I wasn’t so hungry.
“I set us up in front of the TV. Help yourself. I’m just grabbing some drinks,” he called from the kitchen. His back was to me, and he was bent forward getting something out of the refrigerator. “I have water and beer, and that’s about…” his words trailed off as he turned to face me. “Damn,” he hissed as he stared at me, trailing his eyes from the top of my head all the way down to my bare feet. He wasn’t bad to look at either. He’d changed out of
his work clothes and into a pair of shorts and a gray CPD t-shirt.
“Water’s fine,” I motioned to the sink, bringing him out of his stupor. He turned away from me and went back to what he was doing as I rushed into the living room. Two plates were sitting heaped up with rice and pork on the coffee table along with a couple of egg rolls. I lowered myself onto the couch and lifted one of the plates onto my lap. When Jeff came into the room he stopped and stared again. I watched his lips move as if he were talking to himself, but I couldn’t hear what he was saying. He shook his head before handing me my glass, grabbing his plate, and sitting down in the arm chair to my left. It was the farthest he could get from me, and I frowned as I stared at him. “You can sit here. I’ll move over,” I motioned to the spot beside me. I assumed the couch was more comfortable, and he was giving it up on my account.
“I can’t sit there,” he shook his head, refusing to look at me.
“Why?” I looked around, trying to figure it out.
“Because I made a promise to you, and I’m trying to keep it. If I sit there I can’t be sure that I will,” he lifted the remote and turned on the TV.
“I don’t understand,” I set my plate down and turned to face him. “Did I do something wrong?”
“No Lena. It’s not you,” he shoveled a forkful of rice into his mouth almost forcefully.
“Do you want me to leave?” I whispered. I was comfortable, and despite the fact that being here made me nervous, I was tired.
“No,” he barked again as he refused to look at me. “Eat. We’ll talk later,” he scooped up more rice, effectively ending the conversation, but the tick in his jaw said he was upset. I just didn’t know what I’d done or how to fix it.
Chapter 22
Lena
I can’t tell you what we’ve been watching most of the night. My nerves have been strung so tight that I’ve kinda been lost in my head. Jeff hasn’t said much, but remained in the chair away from me. We finished our dinner, and I’ve been curled up on the end of the couch stewing. I don’t think I did anything wrong, but remembering that I was snooping in his bathroom has me worried that he somehow found out.
“Do you think you could take me home now?” my voice was quiet, tentative. I was so used to not upsetting men in fear that they’d hurt me. It was a hard habit to break, and I was still working on it.
Jeff startled from where he was sitting. He rocked forward and put his elbows on his knees. “No,” he shook his head as he ran a hand through his hair and stared at the floor.
“No?” I squeaked. Jeff had always done what I wanted. He was so sweet on our date the other night, and now all I saw was this broody man who kept snapping at me and then telling me it wasn’t my fault.
“I wanna go home!” I sprung to my feet and fisted my hands by my side.
“No,” he tipped his head back and stared up at me.
“Yes! You bring me here for whatever this is,” I waved my arm around. I was getting mad, and he was pushing my buttons. Forget about the bath he let me have, and the clothes he’d let me borrow. Forget about the fact that he ordered my favorite Chinese food for dinner, or that he’d waited on me hand and foot tonight. I thought he’d brought me here because he wanted more. He hasn’t even touched me since our date, let alone kissed me.
“Why am I here?” I stalked over to where he was sitting and stopped right in front of the chair. “What is this?” His breathing faltered as his shoulders rose and fell in quick successions. “Well?” I waited. I could see the build up; the restraint to keep from exploding, but I was tired of him acting like I was broken. I needed him to treat me like he would any other woman. I needed him to make me believe that I was good enough.
His head snapped up, eyes blazing into mine, and pure desire filled them. He sprung to his feet, knocking the plate that had been sitting on the arm of the chair to the floor. “I’m trying to do right by you, Lena. I’ve been fighting with myself all night. Having you here wearing my clothes, it’s killing me not to touch you. I’m slowly losing the battle, but I know that once I tell myself it’s ok, I’m not going to be able to stop. It’s not you, Baby. I’m doing this for me,” his eyes slammed closed as he sucked in a ragged breath.
I swallowed the lump in my throat as I let his words tumble around in my head. Pure need was radiating off of him. The air in the room seemed to grow thick, and despite the darkness of the night, I could see clearly every strained muscle, every flinch, every tremor. I knew he was struggling and despite my nerves, I knew that I was the only one who was going to move this forward. He had to understand that once I did this, he had all the power. He could easily break me in more ways than one. Jeff was someone who could not only break me physically, but emotionally too. I lifted my hand slowly, palm shaking, and placed it on his chest. His eyes flew open as I whispered, “It’s ok.”
“Do you know what you’re asking?” his voice held warning. “There’s no going back from this. You’re mine if we do this. Do you get that? I won’t give you up without a fight.”
Bolstering all the confidence I could find, I blinked a few times before I pushed up on my tiptoes. I leaned in so close I know he could feel my breath on his lips when I let the words tumble out, “I’m yours” and then I pressed them to his, igniting him.
The fuse was lit, and I was swallowed in the fire that blazed out of control. His arms banded around me as his mouth opened and his head slanted to the side. I could feel the heat coming off his chest as he growled, and lifted me into his arms. I could tell we were moving, but I wasn’t paying attention to where. I was in the moment, and that’s all that mattered. Our tongues tangled together amid the frenzy of hands. I slid mine up over his shoulders and into his hair, pulling to get him closer. We were pressed together from chest to pelvis, but it wasn’t enough. I had this need to practically climb inside him, and he seemed to agree.
“Fuck,” he hissed as he turned and I felt my back hit the wall. I giggled when I looked around and saw him fumbling to get the bedroom door open. He grunted and cursed before the wood gave way, and we entered the darkness. He flipped a switch that caused a small lamp in the corner to illuminate, giving enough light that we could see each other, but not the harshness of a fully lit room.
He moved across the room, leaning over the bed to lay me down before climbing up to hover over me. One hand kneaded my ass as the other moved up to cup my jaw. “I’m trying to go slow, but I fucking need you so bad,” he panted as his nose skimmed up my neck. “Seeing you here, in my space, wearing my stuff. I’m only so strong,” he nipped at my lobe before returning to my mouth. Our kiss was so wild our teeth crashed together multiple times. I lifted my hips and pressed them against him, trying to relieve the pressure that was building. I hadn’t been turned on like this in years. Sex had become routine with the men at Leo’s. It was a job, not something that I wanted. Memories of the last time Leo forced himself on me flashed through my mind as Jeff’s hand snaked under the shirt I was wearing. He’d walked in on Leo and me. I tried to push the thoughts out of my mind, but Jeff must have sensed my unease. “I’m not him. I don’t see you that way,” he cupped my breast and squeezed lightly. “You’re beautiful Lena. Any man would be blind not to notice you,” his hand moved higher until he could grip my chin. “Do you hear what I’m saying?” he turned me to face him, and when our eyes connected, there was a softness to his. The alpha was hidden for the moment, and the Jeff that I’d come to trust was there; reassuring me that he wanted me. He knew just what to say, and when to say it. “I want you, not her,” his fingers released my chin before brushing my hair back off my forehead. “God, I want you,” he leaned in pressing his mouth back to mine as he pulled my leg up to wrap around his hip. He pressed forward grinding his erection into me causing me to moan. The soft fleece of the sweats I was wearing were soaked, and I knew he’d feel it soon. His hand slipped down my back and passed the waistband of the pants, cupping my ass. He ground himself into me again as he squeezed my ass cheek pulli
ng me into him in the process. “Tell me to slow down if I go too fast,” he panted as he released me. He sat up quickly and reached behind his neck to tug his shirt over his head. He tossed it to the side before he leaned back down to press a quick kiss to my lips. When he leaned back, he grabbed my hands and helped me sit up before slowly sliding the t-shirt I was wearing up my torso. I closed my eyes as he removed it and threw it in the same direction his had gone.
“You’re beautiful. Stop whatever’s going on in there,” he tapped my head before lowering me back to the bed. “This is pure perfection,” he murmured as he leaned down and captured one nipple in his mouth. I couldn’t hold back the strangled sound that came out of me even if I tried. The zing that rushed through my body was unstoppable. No man had ever worshiped me like he was doing. It was always what the man wanted; how he could get off. Jeff was making sure that I was benefitting here too. “So perfect,” he mumbled as he moved to the other breast. While his mouth was worshipping me, his hands began to move. He slowly slid them to the waistband of my sweats and tugged at where I had them tied. He growled when the knot didn’t loosen right away, but refused to give up. When the drawstring slipped loose, his hand dove underneath and brushed against me.
My hips jerked forward as a moan slipped out. “You’re so fucking wet,” he hissed when his mouth lost its contact with my breast. “I need to taste this. Fuck, I need to taste this so bad.” He rocked back on his knees so he was sitting up and yanked the material over my hips. I was bare underneath, thanks to my bath, and Jeff’s eyes went wide with lust when saw me. “So beautiful,” he whispered. He moved back slightly on the bed before leaning forward and nuzzling the inside of my thigh. “I’ve dreamed about this, but my fantasies didn’t do you justice,” he murmured. His breath blew across me causing me to shiver, but when he leaned in and swiped his tongue across my center, he sent me over the edge. My whimpering turned into begging and my hands gripped the sheet below me.
Below the Surface (The Witness Series Book 5) Page 14