Violet’s Bucket List

by Embers, Tuesday

  His gaze turned steely, deciding something on the spot. “Tha’s the last time ye jump out of a plane without me. I thought I might have a heart attack, watching ye disappear in another man’s arms. Never again, Mouse, ye hear?”

  I was dumbfounded, and incapable of intelligent speech. “You barely know me.”

  “Aye, but tha’s about to change. Tell me tha ye want me.”

  My voice came out a choked whisper, my heart thrumming so loud, I thought for sure it must be audible to the bushes and weeds that surrounded us. “I want you, Eli.”

  A relaxed smile brushed across his face, turning up the corners of his scowl, and crinkling the edges of his eyes. “Grand. Now tell me tha ye want me to kiss your sweet lips.”

  “What? I… I… Um…” I should’ve been begging him to kiss me, but my brain started to implode. The visual seemed so very far outside the limits of reality, that I didn’t entertain the fairytale all too often. My graphic lusty dreams hadn’t graduated too far beyond him touching the curve of my ear.

  Eli seemed to understand, ignoring Brady’s call for us to join him and Caty at the picnic spot the company had picked out for us to land near. His lips moved toward mine, his soft scruff teasing me with purely masculine energy. I couldn’t help but drown in the intoxication that washed over me.

  I whimpered like a baby into his kiss when his lips finally landed on mine. I was grateful that I seemed to have gone crazy in the most beautiful way. Surely Eli couldn’t be kissing me, his fingers tangling in my messy hair. He pulled on my locks, so he could angle my face upward and explore my tongue more thoroughly on the third pass of his lips against mine.

  Heat shot through my body like lightning, confusing and exciting me beyond what a normal first kiss should be able to do. I felt enraptured, enticed, entranced, and completely and hopelessly lost in the moment.

  I fisted his collar, and he palmed the back of my head, as if we couldn’t get close enough. The beautiful kiss turned wild – too much pent-up attraction making us crazy for each other. The feral low growls in the back of his throat stirred up something I’d told myself it was fine to live without. Our get-to-know-you pace grew frantic, as if we’d been kissing for years, and wanted to get down to business. When he bit my lower lip, I moaned aloud for him, unable to keep the explosive attraction to myself.

  Eli’s hungry and sexy noises were honey over my heart, coating my insides with something golden and beautiful. He sounded enthralled, and completely in the moment. There was also a note of distress to his low rumbles. I knew that fear, for it was my own, as well. I was scared of how much this kiss meant to me, and how high I would crash from if the magic ever deserted us.

  In his kiss, I saw unending exquisiteness, allure and permanence. I saw too many incredible things that only his lips could put in my imagination. Then I saw less, as somehow my body decided it had reached some sort of beauty maximum, taking me down at a plummeting pace. My knees buckled, and my body went slack. The golden loveliness of the moment faded to black, and I passed right out in Eli’s arms.

  12

  Orange Juice from Ireland

  “I really can’t tell you to knock it off any more today. I’m embarrassed enough, Brady.”

  “You should’ve seen the two of you going at it! It was crazy, Vi. I mean, I’ve seen you with guys before, but it was nothing like that. You looked like you were attacking each other or something.”

  Caty was thoughtful when she spoke. “It was so great to see you let go. Not for nothing, but I’ve never seen a kiss that intense. I mean, it made you faint! Like, you fainted in his arms because he kissed you. I can’t remember the last kiss that made me that weak in the knees.”

  I rolled my eyes at the both of them. They wouldn’t let me get off the couch, even though we’d been home almost half an hour. Eli had run to the store to grab me some orange juice, in case my blood sugar was low. He left them with strict instructions that I wasn’t to get up while he was out, just in case. “Hello, you’re engaged to the love of your life, Caty. I’m sure you have weak-in-the-knees kisses all the time with Dennis. Mine was just worse because of the jumping from a plane thing.”

  Caty had a sad look in her eyes from her place on the floor. She leaned her cheek on my hip so I could run my fingers over her hair to soothe the sadness on her face. “Dennis didn’t want to come with me.”

  Brady and I let her words settle in the air a few beats before addressing them. “There’s nothing wrong with not wanting to jump out of an airplane. I think that’s a normal response to have. We’re the weird ones, not Dennis,” I insisted.

  “Maybe. I guess I just wish he was weird like us, or at least weird like me. I’m worried I’ll become less strange just to fit in with his boring friends. Last night, Dennis said this was stupid – the list and our promise to cross everything off of it.”

  Brady was just bold enough from the day’s events to speak candidly – a thing we tried not to do concerning Dennis. It never went over well. He thumbed the rim of his water glass. “You know who Dennis is, Caty. Neither of us are surprised that he’s not enough for you. Nice guy, but I’ve seen you get more excited about cupcakes than when he would call.”

  I remained mute on the subject of Dennis, so as not to gang up on her. “I think you did great today, hun. I mean, you jumped out of a plane! Who does that? You’re a wild woman, Caty.”

  She managed a smile for me. “You guys didn’t let me back out of the jump today. That’s love. Dennis hasn’t even called to see if I landed safe.”

  I cupped her cheek, pressing her face to my hip. “You didn’t call him, either. Maybe you should. Maybe he’s worried sick, but didn’t want to be overbearing.”

  “Speaking of overbearing,” Brady teased as Eli’s boots clomped up the steps. He moved into the apartment with worry etched into his features. “Hey, Eli.”

  Eli grunted in response, but kept his eyes only fixed on me as he leaned over the couch to help me sit up slowly. “Are ye alright, Mouse? I’m so sorry. Tha’s never happened to me before. I’ve never made a woman faint, and I feel terrible. Drink this.” He unscrewed the lid on the single-serve bottle of orange juice and tipped it to my lips.

  I took a few swigs and then pulled back. “I’m really fine, Eli. More embarrassed than anything else. It’s the skydiving.”

  “I’ve never held a limp woman in my arms, and I’ve got to say, I didn’t care for it. I like ye with fight and tha spark you’ve got when you’re right about something. Tha I put out your spark?” Eli shook his head. “I’m sorry, Mouse. The next time I kiss ye, I’ll go slower. I feel like I attacked a wee bit.”

  “The next time?” Hope lifted in my breast that the best kiss of my life might be followed up by a second one.

  “Aye. Ye don’t think I’d pass up on another one of those, do ye? Tha was…” He rubbed his chest, and stared at me with a hunger I knew the pains of all too well. He sat down on the couch next to me, his arm falling around my shoulders, as if we did this sort of thing all the time. “Rest up, Mouse. After I win my fight tonight, I’ll be wanting more of tha, for sure.”

  I blushed and nodded sheepishly. “I think that’d be alright.”

  He tucked a lock of hair behind my ear, making me shiver from the simple touch. He treated me as if I was precious, and not the woman whose wardrobe was mostly scrubs, and who had a very physical job that wore her out most days.

  Brady moseyed over to the fridge and took the list off, handing it to Caty. “Do the honors, babe. Cross off Number 17 for us. We jumped out of an airplane today. I think that makes us all pretty badass.”

  Caty scribbled through the item with flourish, and then tipped the pen to her lips in thought. “Since that was mine we just did, I get to pick the next one. Hmm.” Her eyes pored over the list. “What are we thinking, here? We did Brady’s last, so I should pick something Violet added. Did we want to learn to speak French, or did we want to take French cooking classes? Or did we want to just skip the mid
dle man and take a trip straight to France? That’s on here, too.”

  I chimed in with my vote. “I’m thinking we should learn the language before we go. I’ve already finished with that Rosetta Stone package we got a while back. Brady’s mostly done.”

  “I’m awesome at French now. I eat French fries, could order like a boss at a French restaurant, watch French movies (with subtitles), you name it. I can finish up and give you the Rosetta Stone stuff tomorrow, if you want.”

  “Oui,” Caty replied, sticking the list back on the fridge. “See? I’m totally French already. I’ll YouTube some French lessons online and start learning today. I’m in the mood to be awesome.” She cocked her eyebrow at us. “After all, I did just jump out of a plane.”

  Brady laughed at Caty’s choices that were all things I’d been the one to add to the list. “Wow, Vi. After learning French, you’ve only got cutting off your hair, the French cooking class, and the trip to France on here. This list is disproportionate.”

  I shrugged. “Sure, but a trip to France is a big one. That’s gotta count for like, five things at least.”

  “Ye want to go to France?” Eli inquired.

  “Sure. Who doesn’t? Have you ever been?” I realized I knew shockingly little about the guy I was kissing.

  “Aye. Just once. I’m in on the list too, now, yeah?”

  Brady answered for everyone. “Of course. You’re one of us now, even before you were sucking face with Violet. You should start thinking of things to add to the bucket list, too. Then it’s our list, not just the three of us.”

  Eli nodded once, his eyebrows pushed together as he thought. “Drink more juice. I don’t want ye fainting again. It’s been too long since I kissed ye, and I’ll be wanting another taste before we go to the match tonight.”

  I obliged him, though really, I was feeling fine. I drank about seven gulps before I begged off, resting my head back on the couch, cozying up in his half-embrace. Eli leaned in and brushed his nose to mine, moving from side to side slowly to tease a blush out of me. He was so very good at that. When his lips touched on mine, it was only a taste this time, but more than enough to draw out an embarrassingly breathy whimper from both of us.

  “Tha’s better. No fainting this time?” he said with a lazy, satisfied smile as he pulled back.

  “Must be the orange juice. Cured me right quick.”

  “T’wasn’t the juice tha cured ye. It was me. Ye should always be kissing me.”

  Caty let out a loud noise of frustration and stood to pace the room. “See? That’s what I want! I didn’t catch half of what Eli said, but I still know it was romantic because I can see the way he looks at you. We’ve been home for half an hour, and Dennis doesn’t even know I made the jump safely.”

  “Maybe he’s too nervous to call,” I offered. “You should go home and surprise him. Give Dennis a good weak-in-the-knees kiss he won’t forget.”

  Caty rolled her shoulders back, recalling that she was a beautiful blonde who’d just jumped out of a plane like a wild woman, and that sulking at home didn’t suit her. “You know what? You’re right. I’ll see you all at the fight tonight. Best of luck, Ireland.”

  13

  Eli’s Blurts

  I scurried away from Eli, shutting myself in my bedroom after our kiss. “I can’t kiss you anymore. If I stay out there for one more second, I might spontaneously combust!”

  Eli’s chuckle was too near the door, making me reach out and touch the wood that separated us. “Alright, Mouse. I’ll be in my room, if ye need me for a good shag.”

  My voice was shrill. “Do not even joke about that! I’m barely holding it together, here. Pretend I said something cool.”

  “Tell me tha was the greatest kiss of your life.”

  “Well, obviously.”

  “I’m coming back for ye in twenty minutes, and we’ll do something together tha I can’t throw ye down and kiss ye through. Something normal to calm things down, so ye don’t combust. Tha sounds messy.” He merely laughed, and then gave me the space I needed to calm down.

  Caty texted me on the way to her home, asking if I could block out November 4th for her, so we could meet with the event coordinator for the wedding shower.

  I stared at the calendar on my phone, checking the date with a cursory glance, until my eyes fell on the little birthday cake icon that had my mother’s name on it. November 1st was coming up, whether I was ready for the gut-punch or not.

  As the holidays neared, I tried not to bog myself down in the glum wave of depression that threatened to sink me if I shook hands with it for too long. The bucket list was perfect for distracting me from the fact that my Mother’s birthday was coming up, which consequently fell on my favorite holiday. The Dia de Los Muertos wasn’t an American tradition, but we brought a little of Mexico with us on our journey to the States. On November 1st, we painted our faces to look like goofy skeletons, and visited the graves of people we didn’t know to leave them treats.

  Brady hadn’t understood my insistence that the dead deserved a little candy in their afterlife, but he went along with it anyway. Caty had been painting her face with me since we were silly junior highers together. We’d walk around school, looking like skeletons and grinning like two giddy schoolgirls who were in on a secret the rest of the students couldn’t begin to understand. Then after school, we’d make my mom the fanciest cake we could muster. Most of the years it was a sugary, lopsided mess, but Mom always said we were geniuses in the kitchen. She had the disposition of sunshine most days, and beamed brightest on her birthday. It was a thing of fortune that her birthday coincided with her favorite holiday. It was as if the cosmos gathered together to give her a giant hug on November 1st every year. Nothing got her down, not even the breast cancer that took her away from me far too soon.

  It had been two years since I’d put on face paint and laid treats on the graves of people I didn’t know. Mom had been too sick to do much of anything all last year, barely able to lift her head when she was nearing the end. With her death staring me down, I hadn’t seen the point of face paint, candy, silliness, or traditions in general. After nearly a year of distance from the tragedy, I still didn’t see the point in the silliness.

  After she passed away shortly after her last birthday, I took on too many hours at work, and buried myself in paying off my mother’s many medical bills. Then I attacked my student loans with the same fervor. Caty and Brady were the only people who reminded me to be a person every now and then, and I loved them for it.

  I quickly typed in Caty’s meeting on the 4th, and put my phone away, just in time for my twenty-minute hiatus from Eli’s lips to come to an end.

  That afternoon, we distracted ourselves doing the grocery shopping for the household. Brady was terrible at shopping. He’d come home with six cases of beer, two frozen pizzas, a few tins of tuna and a jug of milk when it was his turn.

  It was supposed to be a relaxing errand to run, but I gripped the cart with too much anxiety, keeping a healthy six inches between myself and the hottest guy in the store.

  Make that hottest guy in the universe. Eli ate healthy, putting in fruits and vegetables, making him both hot and smart, which was a deadly combination for my self-control. “Do ye eat carbs? Tell me you’re not one of those girls who’s afraid of a potato.”

  “I only eat carbs when I’m awake. I’m trying to cut back.” I smirked, glancing down at my generous hips and biting back the urge to tell him it was obvious by my figure that I preferred carbs to air. “For someone I live with, I don’t actually know what you like to eat.”

  “I grew up on my father’s farm, so I’m used to meat and potatoes. Your typical Irish fare, I guess. But lately I’ve been eating whatever the sexy chef has on the stove. I thank my lucky stars someone so lovely cooks for me. I’m thinking it’s time I return the favor. I can cook for the three of us every Monday and Tuesday. Sound alright? Get myself in on the rotation.”

  I blushed, swooning whenever he impli
ed I was pretty. I’d never cared much about that, being too busy with school, or helping my mom at her housekeeping job to primp. “You’re trying to make me clumsy.”

  “I’m trying to make ye smile.” He reached over and swiped his thumb across my lower lip, a longing burning in his eyes. “There it is. Any day ye smile at me is a good one, Mouse.”

  My tongue stuck to the roof of my mouth, gluing in any stupid replies that might come tumbling out at the wrong moment. I cleared my throat and broke eye contact, pushing the cart along the refrigerated meats section. “Do you miss your family? It must be hard to live across the ocean from them.”

  Eli inhaled deeply, looking like he was debating between the truth and a G-rated version he whipped out for acquaintances. “I don’t get along with my Da. He’s married to the farm, and I had a need to get far away from tha life. I did my duty as his son and helped him until I finished school. The day I graduated, I enlisted, and never looked back.” He reached into the cooler, pulled out some ground beef, and set it in the cart. “He told me if I left the farm, I shouldn’t come back, so I didn’t.”

  I blinked at him, factoring in the new information that made him more of a human than a celebrity. “Do you think he meant it?”

  Eli shrugged. “I think tha hardly matters anymore. After all these years, he’s never reached out. Not even sure he knows which continent I’m on.”

  I couldn’t imagine my mother not wanting to be with me. Our time was cut short because sometimes life is just that cruel, but to have all the time in the world and waste it like that? I couldn’t comprehend it. “That’s terrible. He doesn’t know where you work, where you live? Nothing?”