The Silver Bear's Mate

by Fay Walsh

  “I know you are, but remember you don't have to go through things alone. I'm trying to understand that myself, but it’s hard. But, these fights don’t have to be solo battles. They can be ones that we work together with. I want to work with you Sven, even if this isn't easy for either of us,” she said.

  There was a pause, and she noticed that Sven hadn’t said anything since she uttered those words. She meant it, and after a bit, he sighed.

  “You know, Vicky, I want to tell you everything. I don’t want to hide it from you, but I'm not going to yet. I don’t... I don't want you to run away. I'm scared to admit everything to you, to tell you the secrets that I have in my head. I'm just scared, that’s all. I hope that... I hope that with time, you’ll be able to understand, and I hope that with time, we can work through it all, and be something bigger than what we thought we could be,” he said.

  She listened to his words. He didn’t seem to be blowing her off, but he seemed to be at odds with himself, trying desperately to figure out what he should do. It was a giant mess, that was for sure, and she didn’t know how to feel about it all either, but she was trying her best.

  “Well, if you’re ready to talk about it, know that I'm always open. I guess for now I'll back off,” she said.

  “Yeah. I need to… I need to leave you alone for a bit. For your own sake, and for your safety. Vicky, I'm a monster, and I don’t want you to have to experience any of the horrors that I'm going through right now,” he said.

  Those words alone upset her immensely, making her realize that he didn't want her to get hurt, but was only hurting her more and more.

  “You do realize that you saying that is just hurting me more, right?” she asked.

  “I know Vicky. I'm sorry I-”

  “No, it’s fine. I get it. You are trying to protect me in your own way, but it’s definitely not working. I'm hurt, and you don't seem to understand what it is that you’re doing, do you,” she said.

  “I'm trying to understand, I swear-”

  “No, if you did care, you’d tell me. You wouldn't give me this runaround, and you’d be honest with me. I'm just… I'm upset about it all, that's all. I'm trying to figure out the best way to get over it, but I think the best way to do so is to just let things go their own way. I shouldn't get upset over this any more than I am. I don’t need your crap in my life,” she said.

  “It’s not like that Vicky. I'm scared to tell you everything because I know that if I do, it could affect us for the worse,” he said.

  ”Oh, and you don’t have your priorities straight at all Sven. You only care about yourself, and nothing more. I hate it, and honestly, I need a break from this. It’s only going to hurt me more and more, and I don’t need your bullshit,” she said to him.

  She felt the anger start to come out of her words, and she knew that she should be a bit nicer, but she couldn’t seem to shake the fact that it was bothering her immensely, and that this whole thing was driving her crazy. He then spoke.

  “I'll leave you be. When I'm ready to tell you, I will,” he said.

  “Yeah, like that’ll happen,” she muttered.

  She didn’t mean to sound so bitchy, but Vicky was just tired of being led on by him. She was tired of being given the runaround by him, of being led on by this man, and it pissed her off knowing he was doing just that. But, as she looked at her phone after the whole encounter was over, a wave of regret and guilt flooded through her head. She hated that it was happening this way, and Vicky wondered if it was too much, too fast. Maybe she shouldn't have had sex with him.

  Maybe she shouldn't have been so interested in finding out all of the information about Sven that she wanted to hear. Maybe she should've been better about this. Most of all, she didn’t know what to do about anything at this point. The feeling of regret, of upset, and of betrayal hit her.

  She hated that it was hitting her like this, and it pissed her off since she knew for a fact that if she continued down this path, it would only make everything worse. Vicky knew that she would need to leave him alone though, and she would need to figure it all out on her own, when the time was right, and by her own volition.

  She decided to leave Sven alone. If he did care about her, which she hoped that he did, he would come to her. She didn’t need to chase his bullshit, nor did she need to wait for him to come to her, acting like it was nothing.

  He was hiding something for a reason, and if he didn't want to tell her, then so be it. She couldn't keep holding onto this, getting mad over it. It was her mistake, her fuck up, and she would need to pay for it eventually.

  Chapter 9

  After Sven hung up the phone, a wave of regret washed over him. He didn’t want that to happen. That was the last thing he expected to have happened, but here he was, sitting there with the phone in his hands, and annoyance on his face.

  “Why couldn't I tell her? Why am I so scared to admit the truth?” he asked himself.

  He thought about it and figured that he had a few options. Either he would tell her everything, and they would go from there, or he would wait until the time was right before doing anything. He could feel the annoyance run through his body as the thought of telling her ran through his mind. If he told her, it had the potential to affect their relationship in a good way, or in a terrible way. He didn't know how to tell her that he saw a vision of her trying to kill him. The fact that he did definitely bothered him.

  He went back to the main part of the den, sighing as he curled up on the couch with a book in his hands. As he did so, he heard the sound of a whistle. He looked up, seeing Travis there.

  “What's the matter?” he asked.

  “It’s nothing. I don’t know how to explain it,” he said.

  “Sven, I'm the alpha. I can tell when things aren't good and when you need help. You’re trying to figure out what to do about something, but you’re afraid of telling me, aren’t you?” he stated.

  Sven tensed, trying to figure out how to tell his alpha the truth, how to admit everything that he wanted to.

  “You could say that. It’s about Vicky,” he said.

  “Is it that new girl you've got the hots for?” he asked.

  “Yeah well, I don’t know if we are going to be anything serious at this point. The thing is, I want to be with her, but I'm scared to get her involved,” he said.

  “Why not? I mean, you can clearly tell that the others have dealt with similar, and their mates were fine with it. I mean, even my girl could tell you about what you need to do.”

  “It’s not just that. It has to do with these damn visions, Travis. It’s hard to explain,” he said.

  ”Wait, you had a vision about her?” he asked.

  ”Yeah. I don't’ know how to tell her though. The vision that I had… wasn’t a pretty one. I actually saw her in danger. I saw a vision of her right after we had sex,” he said.

  “Damn, you bedded her already. Good job,” he said.

  “You don’t have to be that crude. But yes, I did. It was nice, to say the least. She’s a really good girl, just meddles in business that isn’t hers,” he said.

  “I see. Sounds a lot like the other mates here,” he said.

  “Yeah, I know that. I know that Alana is kind of the same way, but I'm scared to tell Vicky the truth. Vicky is really nice, and I don’t want her to worry about this. From what I gathered, it has to do with the bad feeling that I have going on in my head. I noticed that, right after I had that bad feeling, I started to notice her more in my visions. I actually had a vision that we would have sex. But, I definitely know that the vision I am having about her are those that I don't know how to cope with,” he said.

  “Well, what would be the risk of her learning about who you really are?” he asked.

  “There’s the risk of her potentially running away, that's for sure.”

  “Come on, Sven, if she wanted to hightail it out of there, she would've done so already,” he said to him.

  Sven nodded.

&nb
sp; “I guess you’re right. But, there is also the fact that she may end up dying, and she might be in danger,” he said.

  “Well, we don’t know for sure if she would be in danger,” Travis admitted.

  “Yeah but I had a vision regarding it,” he said.

  “Well, your visions have been wrong before, right?” Travis pointed out.

  “True, but still, that doesn't mean that I'm just going to let it be,” he said.

  “I know that Sven. I know that you're scared. I was the same way. I was scared of telling Alana everything. I know that she wanted to run away when she found out, but she didn’t. If she really does care, she will stay and listen. If you really care about her, you’d tell her everything,” Travis explained.

  He sighed, listening to those words from the alpha. As much as he hated that Travis was right, he was, well, right. It made him realize that Travis was the alpha for a good reason. He always had that outside view on this crap.

  “You’ve helped the others with this in the past, haven’t you?”

  “Of course. Darren came to me a lot when he first got together with his girl. Lisa is pretty sweet, I'll give her that,” he said.

  “Yeah, she’s nice. But, you understand the problem. You know where the problems lie, and the solutions to these problems. You’re not afraid to tell others what they need to hear.”

  “Of course. That’s what I'm telling you right now. I know that you’re worried about this, but the thing is, your powers may help her. It might be better if she does know everything.” he said.

  “But the others don’t even know about my visions,” Sven said.

  “They don't have to know unless, of course, you think it’s time to tell them. If not, then you shouldn't have to tell them. You’re not obligated to let a damn soul know about your shifter powers, but I will say that if you want to let them know, I'll make arrangements so that it’s as easy as possible for you,” he said.

  “Thanks, Travis. You know, I'm glad you're the alpha and not Darren. I don’t really think Darren is equipped to handle this crap,” he said.

  “You're right on that one, Sven. Darren is good as the second in command, but he doesn't understand how to handle women or relationship issues. He still comes to me for help with the whole relationship he has with Lisa. So don’t be afraid and don’t worry about what the others might think. This is your life, your choice, and ultimately, it should be what you want. Don’t worry about what others think, and you should do what you feel is right for you,” he said.

  Sven nodded, listening to his words.

  “I know you say that, but I'm still wary about letting others know about this, you know,” he said.

  “I know, Sven. It’s scary. But you should tell her if only to repair the trust you guys once had,” he said.

  “I know. But, what about the visions. I mean, I feel like if I tell her about that, she might freak out. They're hard to explain, you know,” he said.

  “Vicky seems to be the type that's more open than you think. If nothing else, you should tell her. I think she may be more open to learning about you than you may think,” he explained.

  Sven nodded. He knew that Vicky was the type to understand, but that still didn't mean that he was ready and comfortable to explain it.

  “Yeah, I get that, but will she run away if I tell her that I saw her fight me, attack me and that I can see into the future? I don't know, Travis, and I fear that if I tell her, she might get scared, and it may make things worse,” he said.

  “Here’s the thing, Sven, you worry about what others think too much. I know that you care about her, and if you do care about her, you should let her know. She should know by now the truth about you, and if you want to be serious with her, you should be honest. Do you think she’s the one, your mate?” he asked.

  Sven thought about it. He did like her, but the idea of being a mate with her was still something that he wasn't totally sure of yet.

  “I don't know Travis. I like her, and I had sex with her, but I'm worried about bringing her in any deeper with this,” he said.

  “Well, you’ll never know if she is until you try to sit down and have a real, honest conversation about it. I know that finding a mate isn’t easy for you, Sven, and I know that you’re not the best at getting along with others. I'm still surprised that you accepted her offer for a date, but I guess that's to be expected. You should know by now that with the right choices, the right ideas, and the right life, you’ll be happier with the results as time goes on. I think you should be honest, even if it is just to find out whether or not she feels the same way,” he said to Sven.

  Sven nodded, listening to the words that Travis uttered. Why was he always so damn right on the money with this? Why was he so correct? It bothered him knowing that Travis seemed to get it when others didn’t. But, it was nice, that's for sure, and he definitely was quite excited about this.

  “Fine. I'll do it,” he said.

  “Good. Tell her the truth, Sven, and you’ll notice that things will get easier. I know that at this point, it can be better for you, and you’ll be much better off with time. I think you have an idea of what it is that you need to do,” he said.

  “I do, Travis. I know what I must do. And that is to tell her everything,” he said.

  “Good. You’ll be happier this way. Anyways, I should go check on Alana. She’s been feeling sick recently. Part of me wonders if there is more happening with her than she’s telling me. We have been trying for a kid, but who knows,” he said.

  “Wow. I hope it happens. Congrats, if so,” Sven said.

  “Don’t get too excited, she may just not be feeling that good ‘cause of the weather. Anyways, I better get going,” Travis said.

  He went outside towards his home, and Sven looked forward. He needed to talk to her, even if it meant that their relationship would be strained, and things would be awkward.

  He waited until daytime the next day to call her. He knew that Vicky was off on Wednesdays, and when he called her, he expected her to not pick up immediately, for that was just part of the course with all of this. He then heard her speak after a moment.

  “You’re back,” she said.

  “Yeah, I'm sorry for acting the way that I did. I know it wasn't fair to you, and I'm sorry I'm so shit with relationships,” he stated. He felt bad about this, but then, after a moment, she spoke.

  “No, I probably moved everything too damn fast. I have a bad habit of doing that,” she said.

  “It happens to the best of us. But, I wanted to talk to you about something else Vicky. I feel like I should say it to you in person though. I'm not comfortable with telling you about it over the phone. That’s because it’s pretty significant to who I am, and it might help with explaining a few things. You deserve to know the truth, and something else that I haven’t told any of the shifters, minus the alpha,” he said.

  She then gasped. “Wait, there's something else,” she said.

  “Yeah. And I'm a little scared to let you know about this, but I think it’s best if we do work together through this. I know for a fact that with the way things are, we should be honest with ourselves, and we should make it so that we’re able to work together,” he said to her.

  “I see. Well, if you want to talk, I'm willing to listen. Just, don’t hide it from me, please. I'm sick of others hiding the truth of what’s going on. I'm a big girl, and I can handle it. I know the truth about you being a shifter, and I didn’t run away at that point, so why would you think that I'm going to run away with any other bombs dropped,” she said.

  “You’ve got a point. Thanks for that Vicky. It is really nice to know that,” he said.

  “Well, you’re stuck with me. I was a little pissed about what you were hiding, but I guess whatever you’ve got in the back of your head is something that you should try to figure out on your own, and make it so that you’re able to really make it right for yourself. I know it’s not easy, but you should do what’s right for you,”
she said to him.

  “Thank you, Vicky. It is nice to have someone who kind of understands this, who knows what is going on, and who can help me,” he said to her.

  She then paused, sighing in response.

  “I'm going to try to forgive. But I want the truth. I don’t want to hide this anymore. I want to know what goes through your head,” she said.

  “And you’ll get that. I'll be honest with you Vicky, and I want to be there for you, no matter what the odds might be,” he told her.

  “I got it. Well, how about later tonight. At the diner,” she said.

  “Yeah, just get a spot in the back, if that’s okay,” he said.