The Journey Home

by K'Anne Meinel

  ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

  Stephanie cooked fresh venison for dinner. Its rich taste was different from the venison that Cass had provided. Cass explained that was because her brother hunted deer that had never eaten farmer’s corn or other crops, these deer were deep in the woods and eating things there. The flavor of their meat reflected that. Cal though hadn’t had a home cooked meal in a long time and felt awkward sitting up to the table. The boys stared at him all the time and it further added to his discomfort.

  “You get all the crops in?” he asked his sister as he sat smoking a pipe after dinner. The smell of it made Stephanie nauseous and she was grateful when she went to wash the dishes as Cass socialized with her quiet brother.

  Cass nodded as she glanced at Stephanie realizing she wasn’t feeling well. She was very attuned to her housemate. Six months and more gone in her pregnancy she looked ungainly and was only getting larger. Her glance towards Stephanie didn’t go unnoticed by her brother. He glanced too and then realized the nauseous look on the strange woman’s face and glanced back at his pipe.

  “It’s my last bowl, I made it all last until last week and Running Beaver gave me some homegrown,” he mentioned.

  Cass nodded and then asked, “You going to stay around?”

  He shook his head, “Nope, we’re going up above Superior this summer to see what we can find and trap and hunt. Running Beaver has relatives across the lake through his squaw.”

  “When you leaving?” she asked disappointed in not seeing more of him.

  He shrugged as he glanced at the boys staring at him avidly. They reminded him of Running Beavers children. They were always staring too and then because he was the only white man they knew.

  “Why don’t I take that load into town tomorrow and get cash for it and we decide then,” she offered.

  “Town?” he asked as though it were a foreign country.

  She smiled knowing he hated to go into towns. Most of the season he dropped off pelts when he came around in the well house and she found them and traded them for him. Their arrangement had worked for a while but she was surprised to actually have him in the house this time. She suspected he had seen her ‘visitors’ and been curious. “We’ll get more if we take it down to Wausau,” she began and almost laughed at the look on his face. “But I could go and be back from Merrill in two shakes,” she added. They both knew she wouldn’t get quite as much in Merrill as she would in Wausau but to him the difference was in time, not money.

  “I heard you chopping,” he began as though to say more but stopped, their unspoken conversation would have driven most people crazy but she understood what he was asking without him finishing.

  “Yeah, I want to get that patch between the north field and that meadow cut so I can have more acres.”

  He nodded musingly puffing on his pipe thoughtfully. “I’ll stick around a few days,” he told her as though he had told her a lot and yet to them, he had. Standing up quietly he stretched and turning to Stephanie he said, “Thank you for that tasty dinner ma’am,” before nodding at his sister and heading out the back door.

  “Where’s he going?” Stephanie asked Cass, worrying that she had offended him in some way.

  “He’ll sleep up in the loft,” she said as she watched him leave thoughtfully.

  “You’re going to town tomorrow?” Stephanie asked her as she brought the coffee pot to the table to fill Cass’s cup.

  Cass nodded as she turned to Stephanie, “Yes, but I think I WILL go down to Wausau and get more for those pelts, they are prime. Do you have anything you want me to trade? I got all those eggs.”

  “Can I go?” Timmy asked excitedly.

  “Can I go?” Tommy echoed all though he wasn’t sure for what.

  Stephanie looked hopeful but she pointed to the icebox and said, “I have a few sticks of butter but I’m not so sure they will hold up on the long drive to Wausau.”

  “I’ll chop off some of the ice from a block and we can line a box to keep them cool,” Cass offered.

  Any and all money they could make from the farm was welcome. The money that Stephanie earned from the sale of butter and even some of her cottage cheese was welcome and Cass insisted she keep it. It provided her with an independence that she had never felt before knowing she had money of her own. Cass had shown her a safe of all things that was hidden in the basement and her coffee can was slowly filling with the money she had gotten from Vince and now from her butter and cheese money.

  “Make sure you pick up some bolts of material and I’ll make your brother some lightweight shirts for summer. I can also make him some pants…” she left off as Cass shook her head.

  “Pants wouldn’t last where he goes but the shirts will be welcome. I’ll pick up some cotton but you will only have time to make a couple,” she told her.

  “Well, it’s little enough I can do for the meat he provides,” she began shyly.

  Cass smiled, “Well, the pelts I get a percentage of too, it’s why I want to go down to Wausau instead of Merrill for trade. We’ll get a lot more than we will up here.”

  ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

  The next morning early found Cass on the road south to Wausau. She had a large bucket lined with ice inside of a smaller bucket that contained the sticks of butter and cottage cheese that Stephanie had in jars for sale, all of it covered with a large tight binding of leather. It was a clever idea and she hoped it would work, Stephanie felt a need to contribute and Cass would let her for as long as she was able. Cass had explained that it would be a long day and that she felt Stephanie should stay around the house in her condition and she said she understood. She had kept Tommy home but allowed Timmy to ride along. He was curled up in a blanket sleeping beneath the seat. He had dozed off after a full breakfast and they had started out in the dark.

  Cass appreciated the company. She often enjoyed the little boys company. He was a smart thing and she took him with her whenever possible to teach him things she knew. She hadn’t realized how much she knew until she started sharing with Stephanie and her boys. He woke up after they had been on the road a couple of hours and she handed him half a sandwich that Stephanie had packed for them and a cup of water she poured from her canteen. He ate and drank carefully, making sure not to spill. He wanted to impress Cass that he was a big boy and since coming to live with her he had learned more and enjoyed more freedom than he ever had in his short life. Before he had been expected to play in his front yard only and only occasionally he had a neighbor to play with, now he played and helped both Cass and his mother. The animals were wonderful and Cass made even hard work fun. As pint-sized as he and his brother were they still were able to help a little.

  It was nearly noon before they came down the last hill towards Wausau. The one after Brokaw had been the worst with the horses laboring to climb the winding road to the top and over. Cass stopped them briefly to catch their breath before releasing the brake and letting them set their own pace down into Wausau. She drove on the familiar streets to the store near the depot she had traded in before. She had the last of her honey as well as the furs, the eggs, butter, cottage cheese, and cream that Stephanie had packed to trade. They were happy to see her and gave her top dollar for her furs, much more than she had expected and knew she would have gotten in Merrill. In trade she bought bolts of cloth that Stephanie had put on her list. Different colors and materials for different needs on a farm and in the woods there were many different uses, from clothing to cloth for straining to sacking. She bought her supplies here too, it was always cheaper down in Wausau than up in Merrill to buy food, staples and seed. That extra stop that the supplies had to come in by train meant an added expense to shop owners in their small town which they then passed on to their customers, sometimes a little too much. Cass took advantage of being in the larger town and stocked up on essentials as well as a few things that the smaller town didn’t carry. She loaded up her wagon and bought a candy stick for Timmy who broke it directly in half to save for his little brother
which Cass smiled approvingly to the little boy.

  “Hey do you know anyone who has some rennet?” she inquired lastly to the merchant and he thought for a moment before suggesting she go by the dairy over on third.

  Settled up with the merchant she counted her monies and was thrilled how much they had come out ahead even after she gave her brother his share. She carefully put the monies into three separate portions of what they had earned. They headed over to the dairy the merchant had suggested. She was happy to buy a good piece of rennet before they headed back north towards home.

  “What’s rennet?” the little boy asked as they drove along and he sucked thoughtfully on his candy stick.

  “It’s the lining of a small baby calf’s stomach, usually from a boy calf instead of a heifer,” she told him feeling uncomfortable but realizing that little boys who grew up on farms learned the hard facts of life before townies.

  “What’s it for?” the little boy asked.

  “You make cheese with it, I bought it for your Ma,” she felt relieved that he hadn’t realized how it had come from the calf.

  “Cheese? I love cheese,” he told her proudly as he looked over at her and approved her purchase.

  “Then we will have to help your Ma so she can make it,” Cass told him.

  He was quiet as he thought over what she had told him and then the question she had been dreading came up, “How’d they get it from the calf? And why a boy calf and not a girl calf?”

  Sighing Cass wondered how much she should tell him and decided honesty was the best policy for the little boy. He would learn sooner or later. “It’s the stomach lining of a calf. They have to butcher the calf to get it. They usually use a boy calf because they don’t need as many boy calves as much as girl calves.”

  “They kill it?” the little boy said horrified.

  Cass nodded looking straight ahead at the horse’s heads hoping he wouldn’t ask any more uncomfortable questions but she was doomed to disappointment. She could see he was a bit upset out of the corner of her eye. Before he could cry and get more upset she cut him off, “You ever see a bull?” she distracted him with the question.

  The little boy nodded and wondered why she asked.

  Cass continued at his nod, “Well you only need one bull for a lot of girl cows, heifers, too many bulls and it’s dangerous, they fight when they get big. So sometimes we butcher the boy calves or fix it so they don’t turn into bulls.” She hoped that would satisfy his questions.

  “But why do they have to kill it,” he said, obviously distressed.

  Cass sighed but answered anyway, “Because they need things that they only can get from a small calf, one of the things is this rennet,” she indicated the package she had for Stephanie.

  It seemed to satisfy him but she could see he was upset by the news she had given him. He was quiet for a long time.

  “Are you going to kill our calves?” he asked much later. She could see he was thinking of how much he spent petting the growing calves, how soft they were, how sweet.

  Cass shook her head, “No, our calves are all heifers, heifers give us milk eventually and we want that.”

  “But if we had a boy calf you would kill it?” he asked.

  Cass thought for a moment, “That would depend. I would like our own bull someday so I don’t have to take our cows to be bred elsewhere but I can’t keep every boy calf you understand.”

  He nodded as though he did understand, and then asked, “Why do you need a bull?”

  Cass sighed again, feeling like she was getting into territory that was better left for Stephanie to explain. “You know that to have babies you need a mommy and a daddy or a male and a female?” She had almost said a boy and a girl but caught herself before getting into that line of questioning she was certain would cause a problem.

  He nodded his rooster’s tail bobbing as he finished his candy stick.

  “Well, a bull is a boy cow that is all grown up like a daddy, a male,” she clarified to give him information she knew was a little over his head but sooner he learn like this than being misinformed. She hadn’t learned for years and thought babies came from under a cabbage leaf. She had been horrified to learn the truth although it was there before her all the time on the farm.

  He nodded again.

  “So the bull is the daddy and our cows, the heifers will be mommies,” she left it simple like that.

  He thought for a long time before asking, “What about chickens?”

  “What about them?” she hoped this wasn’t going to go on, she was feeling decidedly uncomfortable.

  “Are the dark ones the daddies and the white ones the mommy’s?” he asked earnestly.

  She almost laughed but refrained at the last moment, he needed to know he could ask her anything and laughing wouldn’t help that along, “No, the roosters are the daddies, the hens are mommies,” she explained simply.

  He seemed to understand that and then, “Are cats the mommy’s and dogs the daddy’s?”

  Again she shook her head, “No, there are male cats that are called toms and those are the daddy’s. The females are usually mommies. Shia was a mommy until her mate was killed by the bear I told you that story. Now it’s up to Seymour,” she still hated that name that they had found out of a book. “To grow up and become the daddy to Shia and Selma,” she hated that name too but the little boy had fallen in love with the puppies and gave them names from one or two of his books that Stephanie read to him. She hadn’t the heart to insist on something else much to Stephanie’s amusement.

  Their conversation finally changed to other things that made Cass a whole lot more comfortable. Soon enough the little boy was yawning and Cass insisted he curl up in the wagon with a blanket and ‘rest his eyes’ as Stephanie put it. He was soon sound asleep and Cass felt the need to join him but kept herself awake by looking around at the scenery.

  They arrived shortly before dinnertime. Cass was relieved, she didn’t know if the trip itself had tired her out or the little boy and his questions. He was raring to go and helped them unload the wagon she had stopped near the back porch. He told Stephanie about the rennet explaining it was from a dead boy calf proudly. Stephanie looked at her in consternation and Cass rolled her eyes.

  She parked the wagon in the garage and took the horses to the paddock after she had brushed them down and fed and watered them before releasing them. They both rolled in the dirt and she laughed at their antics. She had been vaguely aware of the sound of chopping wood coming from the woodlot and she walked towards it after she had fed the animals and poultry.

  She stopped in surprise at the amount of wood chopped and flung about the woodlot. Cal had obviously run a few logs through the sawmill of their grandfathers as logs lay in piles. Cal had then chopped and split wood as she could see by the split and flung pieces all over. He had always cut wood like this. The amount though surprised even her. Cutting the wood in the mill had been a lot quicker and she hadn’t run it in a long time but thought in the future she just might to get the smaller logs that cut so easily into split chunks that burned better in the woodstove and fireplace. Cal was sweating in the late afternoon sun and his tan line along his buckskin bottoms was apparent with its brilliant white line from where the pants slipped down. He obviously went without his shirt often by the depth of his tan on his torso. Hitching his pants up he grabbed the ax and swung it into the butt of a log before splitting it against a stump in the woodlot. Splitting off a large piece he swung it again and took off another large section. In no time at all he had that log reduced to several small easily handled pieces. The pieces lay haphazardly around and he wouldn’t be picking them up, he would just start on another log. His muscles rippled in the sunlight under his sweat. Cass could admire the beauty of his body before she called out to him, “Almost done?”

  He looked up in surprise at her interruption before stopping to wipe his brow, “Oh, your back,” he said unnecessarily.

  “Yeah, just, heard you chopping,�
� she told him as she looked around at the mess he had made, but she didn’t mind, he had cut a helluva lot of wood and she was grateful.

  “Tomorrow I’ll start on that woodlot,” he indicated the section she had told him she wanted to clear to make way to the meadow.

  She nodded as she watched him wipe his face with the back of his hand, getting it dirtier but she wouldn’t tell him. “Got a good price for your furs,” she told him instead.

  He nodded, he didn’t care about money. He had most of what he wanted in his pack, he traded for most everything he needed otherwise. “Just put it in the can,” he told her unnecessarily. He picked up the axe but before he could swing it Cass asked him another question.

  “You eat today?”

  He nodded his head towards a plate and cup in the corner and Cass could see the crumbs left from a meal. “Your girl brought me breakfast and lunch,” he said with a look in his eye.

  “She’s my housekeeper, not ‘my girl’” she told him with a little bit of heat. She knew what he was thinking.

  “Well, whatever she is, she’s a good cook,” he said before taking a bite with his axe into the next log he found.

  Cass narrowed her eyes at her brother. She knew what he had meant and she resented the implication. Shrugging her shoulders she left her brother to his work. He would cut wood as long as there was light and she welcomed his hard work when it would relieve her burden a little.

  ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

  Cass was laughing at her brother now. Stephanie had cornered him when he came in to take a shower after working all day and sweating. She had insisted he sit so she could measure his shoulders and torso as well as his arms and muscles for making him shirts. He had repeated almost verbatim what Cass had told her that pants wouldn’t last long in the deep woods and thanked her for going to the trouble of making him shirts. He was uncomfortable though in the nearness of the pregnant and pretty woman. Cass was enjoying his squirming as she measured him twice before writing down her numbers. He glared at her when he realized her amusement.