Indelible You (Imagine Ink)

by Verlene Landon

  “Oh, Son, you know we love you no matter what, and I knew in my heart of hearts, that you wouldn’t ignore your own baby. I told Erika as much…”

  “What? When did you talk to Erika?”

  “Yesterday, she came by. Called me Saturday, I think. Said she needed to talk, so we set up dinner Tuesday. She loves you madly, you know? She’s just hurting like expletive. She believes you don’t want the baby because it reminds you of her deception, but she explained that too. Really Walker, that’s not a marriage marriage.”

  “I know, Mom. She tried to tell me and I wouldn’t listen, but she found a way to get through to me. Did you just say ‘expletive?’ Never mind. I want her, Mom, forever. Her and my daughter, and any other kids she gives me. I just hope I’m not too late. I don’t think I can wait until seven tonight to see her or talk to her. I’ll have to settle for a call because I am in no condition to drive.”

  “Do what you feel is best, Son, and don’t take any risks, but this kind of thing is best done in person. So, when you see her tonight, you look her in the eye and answer any question she asks you as honestly as possible, even if she won’t like the answer. I can tell you for certain that a painfully-honest answer is better that a feel-good lie any day of the week. You’ll lose her for good if you lie. Erika is not the kind to accept that from the man she loves.”

  “I know Mom, thanks for the reminder. How did she look? Is she well? Is she in pain?” Reverently his eyes devoured his baby girl’s image once again. “Mom? Have you seen her? Did Erika show you the ultrasound?”

  After an extended silence, Francis managed to speak through the emotion that was apparent in her voice. “Yes, Son, I saw her, we have her picture on the front of the refrigerator. Erika looks well and I think after our talk, her pain lessened. When she left, she seemed to have her sights set on hearing you out and probably taking you back.”

  “I hope she can forgive me for not being there through the sickness and swollen ankles. I have a lot of back rubs to make up for. Mom, I’m such a stubborn ass and I’ve missed so much. I hope my little girl and her mother want me in their lives.”

  “I’m telling you, Son, she will. They both will. But not if you don’t pull yourself together. You need to get your head straight. They will need you, all of you. Let go of the guilt and the hurt because you can’t give them your all, if half of you is tied up knots. You hear me?”

  “Yes ma'am, and thanks. I love you.”

  “I love you too, Son, now, you do what you need to, but I expect that baby to be born a Reid.”

  Walker chuckled out, “I’ll do my best, Mom.” Handing the phone back to George, Walker leapt to his feet and embraced the older man he’d known his whole life.

  “I can’t thank you enough man. I would’ve completely lost it without my mom. They made the right choice for my Godparents.”

  “Anytime, Son, anytime,” George said breaking the hug. “Enough touchy-feely shit for now, you’ve got a woman to woo and we got some water damage to take care of. And if I didn’t miss the mark, you’re going to want that spare bedroom turned into a nursery. Congrats, Son.”

  “Thanks George, and you’re right, even if Erika and I can’t get our shit together, I’m going to be a good dad to that little girl. Look at her, ain’t she gorgeous?”

  “Yeah man, she’s a peach, but don’t worry about your woman, she’ll come around. I eavesdropped a bit there, and it sounds like she already has, she’s just waiting for it to be your idea. Besides, remember what I told you earlier. You must’ve done it right.”

  Everyone in ear shot cracked up and patted Walker on the back while taking a glance at the ultrasound photo as they passed.

  CHAPTER EIGHTEEN

  WEDNESDAY - MID/LATE AM

  ERIKA

  Melanie was fashionably late as usual, but this time she had a valid excuse. She’d arranged for a couple of guys from work to swing by and load up boxes, then follow them to the self-storage and do the unloading, and all it was costing her was a couple of pizzas and a six-pack.

  Erika’s heart hit the floor when Melanie called to explain her tardiness. Mentioning how she’d first tried to get Caleb and Marty to lend a hand, but couldn’t get in touch. Since it was painfully obvious Walker didn’t know she was knocked up, it would have been devastating for those two to find out before him. Thank God they were probably at work and away from their phones, because they would’ve been more than willing to drop everything to help their friends out.

  There was no hiding her condition at this point. Expletive, she was about ready to drop this kid. Her navel had popped up like a turkey timer, and she was at thirty-five weeks, so wearing loose clothing or holding things in front of her just looked ridiculous and did nothing to conceal her beach ball of a belly.

  “Thanks Mel, you’re the best,” Erika gushed and embraced her friend when she arrived. She was doing a lot of that lately—gushing. It was too close to call which she did more of, nesting, peeing, or gushing. It was pretty much a dead heat, however, she had her money on gushing pulling ahead around seven tonight.

  “No need to thank me, I’m just so freaking generous like that.” Melanie’s joking came to an abrupt halt and she ended the hug, dropping her hands on her hips and taking on a severe visage. “However, I’m not feeling so generous right now. How the hell did I not know you are about to be a mom. I bet Tori knew, but I’m just your ‘spare’ friend, is that it?” Some of her rant was said with an air of humor, but Erika could tell that there was a grain of truth hidden in the question.

  “Oh, don’t be so dramatic. You are not my spare anything. And no, Tori doesn’t know. You are the first of the bunch to be confirmed in the knowledge.” Melanie’s hands fell from her hips and her jaw dropped to her chest. “Seriously? Not even Walker?”

  With a shake of her head, Erika elaborated, “I tried to tell him, left a pic for him with Augusta, the lady that answered his door a few months back, but now, I’m fairly certain he never saw it.”

  Melanie cut her off. “Of course he never saw it. You can’t possibly think he’d not be here right now worshipping the ground you walk on if he knew he knocked you up, do you?”

  “Well, for a while I…wait. How in the expletive do you know Walker’s the father?” Erika’s shock was genuine.

  “Expletive? Did you just freaking say ‘expletive?’” Melanie burst into a side splitting, lean over, belly laugh. Erika wanted to believe she was just being silly, but had a sneaking suspicion, she was literally about to roll on the floor laughing.

  “Yes, I’m trying to curb my foul mouth, now spill, how do you know?”

  Melanie gave her an almost-disgusted look. One that said, “Are you a freaking moron or what?”

  “How do I know? Really? You have to ask? Shit, and I thought you were the smart one. Everyone knows, well, not specifics mind you, but we all know that neither one of you would even consider sleeping with someone else.” Melanie studied the confused look on Erika’s face for a minute.

  “Shit E, you didn’t think we knew you were head of heels in love with Walker, and that he had it just as bad, if not worse?”

  Erika’s expression confirmed exactly that.

  “Well, obviously it was more knees over shoulders.” Melanie mumbled and laughed, but Erika heard her all the same.

  “Stop laughing Mel. And while you’re at it, stop cursing too.” Erika spun around to the kitchen and poured herself a glass of milk. She hated milk, never drank it, but she heard it was good for the baby, so she chugged it down.

  Melanie followed her and leaned her hip against the counter, folding her arms and crossing one ankle over the other in an apparent relaxed manner. “Wow, you are something else, and so is that big idiot you’re so obviously in love with. Shit…I mean expletive, you two were the only two people in the county that were clueless. We had a pool you know, about when y’all would finally realize what we already did. I won. $900 bucks. Used it to buy this bag among other things, you like?”
Melanie displayed her new designer hobo bag like a Price Is Right girl.

  There’s the Melanie I’m used to. Spunky and slightly annoying, but all too lovable, like the capuchin monkey that flung poo at the glass at the zoo. Erika cracked herself up with that.

  Between the laughter and a well-placed kick to her bladder, she had to waddle to the bathroom, but she wasn’t about to let Mel off the hook, so she continued her verbal inquiry from the throne. “If you didn’t have specifics or know about the baby until just know, how did you collect on the bet? Which I am thoroughly pissed about by the way.”

  “I said we didn’t know specifics, not that we were clueless about y’all doing the dirty. I found out when Tori told me after she talked to you in North Dakota. She wouldn’t share anything juicy, like why y’all weren’t together or anything, the witch. But she confirmed that the deed did in fact take place the Friday of our BBW. When we pulled the pool sheet, Marty and Caleb both said they knew, but didn’t divulge a source. I had that three month block, so I won. Thank God you finally listened to your woman parts for once because I was about to have to drop another $200 to block off some more months.”

  Erika came out of the bathroom with righteous indignation.

  How dare her friends bet on such a thing? All that anger fled when she saw the look on her friend’s face. Yeah, she was joking about it, and they had bet on it, but she couldn’t stay mad at her, at any of them. They really were rooting for her and Walker it seemed and Melanie’s eyes said much more.

  “Tell me the truth Mel, how has he been? Honestly?”

  “I want to lie and say okay, but that was so not the case for months. We were all really worried about him. He went back to that really bad place, you know? But, he turned himself around over the last few months and well, we all breathed a sigh of relief. Tori was beside herself. If Walker hadn’t pulled himself up when he did, we would have gone as far as to stage an intervention-type reality check and kick his ass.”

  As Melanie’s words sunk into her consciousness, Erika grasped the back of the chair in a death grip as the tears gathered in her eyes, ready to make a run south.

  Approaching Erika with compassion visible on her face, Melanie reached out. “Oh, I’m sorry sweetheart, I truly am, but you know I’m not capable of blowing smoke up anyone’s ass and convincing them it’s rainbows and glitter. But listen,” by now Melanie was rubbing Erika’s arms and moving to embrace her, “He did pull himself out, we didn’t have to do it, he did it for himself. That’s a great sign, don’t you see? He wanted to get better, without us pushing him. That’s the kind of recovery that lasts.”

  “In my head, I know you’re right, but my heart is breaking for him. For what he went through when I wasn’t there, hell, I caused it.”

  “You did no such thing. Sure, whatever happened between the two of you was a catalyst of sorts, which, I expect full disclosure on by the way. But, you are not responsible for anyone’s actions but your own. Walker is a grown-ass man, and he went to a bad place, but he’s back now, and I bet he is going to be over the moon when he finds out about the little bambino there.”

  Erika shifted and refocused. She was doing that a lot lately in an attempt to keep her stress down. “You’re right. I need to just accept my part in it, but not shoulder the responsibility for things beyond my control. Besides, I think you’re right, Walker will be over the moon.”

  Everything was starting to fall into place for Erika. She was buoyed by the belief that Walker and she would work it out between them. Not just to be parents, but to be together. Pulled from her thoughts by the doorbell, Erika motioned for Melanie to handle it, since they both knew who it was.

  The guys from work had the truck loaded in no time and followed them to the storage facility before taking off. They promised to show back up at five to offload any new purchases and collect their pizza and beer.

  “So where to now E?” Melanie inquired.

  “I want to go to that big baby super store over in Ralston, do you mind? It should only take us fifty minutes on the interstate, if there’s no traffic. I really need to get the big basics while I have you and the truck and the help. That place has it all so it should be one stop shopping.”

  “Not at all, let’s go.”

  As they headed out, Erika could tell Melanie had something to share, but her pregnancy and Walker had dominated the conversation. Knowing she wouldn’t change the subject herself, Erika decided to do some digging and find out what had Melanie so happy. “So Mel, I can tell you’re excited about something, so spill. What’s put that twinkle in your eye, a man?”

  At her continued silence, Erika pushed a bit more. “A hot man, with abs of steel and a big…”

  A shocked and shrill, “ERIKA!” cut her off, followed by laughter.

  “Bank account Mel. I was going to say bank account, but since you brought it up?”

  “Whatever you perv, isn’t one man, a younger man I might add, enough for you?” Not waiting for an answer, Melanie went on. “If you must know, Nosey Nellie, it’s not a man, well, it might be a man. A man with a big…bank account or rather three men with big, big bank accounts.”

  Letting the silence linger for a second or two longer, Melanie was obviously enjoying torturing her with curiosity. “Oh my God, you should see your face right now, it’s priceless. The three men with the big,” she cut a look at Erika, “accounts, are possible investors. I didn’t want to say anything just yet, because it’s Tori’s surprise too, but remember what Tor and I have been going on about for years?”

  “That retail store idea? The one for fit girls?”

  “Yep, that’s the one. Well, we did some market research and realized that there aren’t any local brick and mortar locations that sell clothes designed for fit women. Not just work out gear, but evening and business wear as well as casual. You know the whole gapping and bunching problem with off-the-rack when you got muscles like these.”

  Mel teased and put on a gun show at the red light.

  “Anyway, seems like we have a great business plan and market potential. We submitted some things to possible investors, got a few call backs, and one face to face. I really think it’s going to happen. They seemed impressed and willing to invest. Tor and I did some personal paperwork as contingencies. If I were to liquidate everything, I could get the startup if the investors fall through. But I think they will be calling back with good news and we will have our own business.”

  “Oh Mel, I’m so happy for you guys, if anyone deserves it, it’s you and Tor.”

  “Ah, but I haven’t told you the best part yet. Tor wanted to wait until everything was set in stone, but you know me, I’m more of a fly-by-the-seat-of-your-pants type gal. And since the cat is out of the bag, might as well shake out the kittens too. Sooo, we want you as one third of our little venture. You’re marketing could be the icing to launch this baby.”

  Erika was sure her silence was puzzling Mel, but she was stupefied. How could they want to share with her? It was too much, it wasn’t her brain child, nor had she worked on the proposal and investors. Nothing. How could she take that from them?

  “Wow, that’s very generous, but I couldn’t. A little marketing is not worth a third of an amazing business concept I had nothing to do with.”

  “Stop right there. First, you had more to do with it than you realize. How many times did you put on jeans and go on about how they should make jeans for thick-thighed women with smaller waists, hmm? And B, a little advertising can make or break a brand. We love you—we are the three amigos—how could we launch a business without you? Besides, ‘Two Thick Chicks’ doesn’t have the same ring as ‘Three.’” Mel started snorting and Erika could tell she cracked herself up with that.

  “First off Melanie, you can’t make a list by starting with first, then B. It’s just ridiculous. And second, ‘Three Thick Chicks’ sounds just as weird as ‘Two.’ Tell me that’s a joke? If you promise to stop abusing the spirit of list making, not name anything �
��Three Thick Chicks,’ and finally admit you are Martin Short to my Chevy Chase, then I’m in.”

  “Woohoo! Okay, you list dictator, I’ll reform my list-abusing ways and pay penance at the temple of Office Max, plus, Tori had the same reaction to the name as you, so ‘Three Thick Chicks’ is out, okay? But for the record, that’s a good name. And fine, I’m Ned Nederlander to your Dusty Bottoms and Tori is and always will be Lucky Day. Happy? Now we just need to decide how to ease Tori’s ire when she finds out I spilled.”

  “Leave Tori to me, she understands how persistent I am, besides, once she finds out about her niece, she won’t give a flip about anything else for a while. Distraction works every time.” Erika rubbed her belly soothing a NFL-worthy punt from her daughter while their laughter filled the air.

  “Oh, and when I tell her you two are co-Godmothers, she won’t care at all,” Erika added casually while covertly studying Melanie’s face for that moment of understanding. When it crossed her face, Erika added, “That is if you say yes.”

  “What do you mean if I say yes? Of course I say yes, heck, I would have inserted myself in the position when you had her baptized whether you asked me or not anyway. But I am glad you asked though, it makes it less awkward for the ceremony.” Mel waggled her eyebrows all weird before she her tone shifted. “But seriously, I’m honored and a little choked up by it. You know I love you like a sister and now I get to be Godmother and honorary aunt.”

  Seeing Melanie excited about it brought a certain joy to Erika. “I love you too Melanie, you’re my sister in every way but DNA. And for the record, you were never less than Tori.”

  Erika knew Melanie needed to hear that, she had her own demons same as anyone else, and she sometimes felt less than around Tori, hell lots of people did. To Erika, they were both her wacky sisters, each unique and special in their own way. Balance, they were balance and she couldn’t imagine life without either one.