Fix Me

by A. Aubry

  He leaned close, pressing his lips against my ear, “Because I wanna feel you bare.”

  Well, that almost made me come on the spot. Finn dropped his boxers to his ankles and kicked them off. He was such a sight to marvel at that I caught myself staring. Now I felt like I was the one back in high school about to lose my virginity.

  “Lay down on the bed, we’re going to keep it simple tonight,” his lips brushed against mine as he lovingly gave me his order.

  He made it sound like we were practicing BDSM in our free time. Finn was still introducing me to positions I had never even tried before. But for tonight, making love in his childhood bedroom, it seemed fitting to do missionary. Going back to basics.

  I crawled on his bed after moving his light blue comforter and sheets out of the way, lying down and waiting to begin. My heart raced, fuck, it almost was like the night I lost my virginity. Finn carefully took his place on top of me, bringing the covers over us. Serious flashbacks of the night I lost my virginity to Kent Foreman were rushing through my head. The fucker didn’t know what he was doing, but I didn’t know that at the time. He had to Google how to put on a condom because the directions on the box were apparently too complicated for him.

  That night I didn’t get an orgasm either, just a shit ton of pain because he was trying to do it fast and hard like in the pornos that he watched. He was the worst sex of my life, after Michael that is. Believe me, that Kent fella…he never got any better at sex and we tried for almost 3 months after that.

  Taking a deep breath, I looked up at Finn. If we would have met in high school…would he have taken my virginity? Who was the girl that he lost his virginity to? We never talked about ex’s that far back. Was she a fling? Were they serious? Fuck, why was I thinking about so many questions at this exact point in time?

  “Julianna, are you okay? You’re shaking a little,” Finn whispered as he covered my body with his.

  Damn, he wasn’t even in me yet and I was already fucking tonight up.

  “Yeah, baby. I’m totally fine,” I said softly, my hand running through his hair.

  “Are you thinking about your first time?” He gazed down at me with a small smile.

  “I was thinking about how fucking terrible it was. It hurt so bad because he didn’t know what he was doing. He thought that it was supposed to be like a porno. But when I was screaming out, it wasn’t in pleasure,” I sighed, being honest with him.

  His lips gently brushed against mine, “Well then. I’ll just have to show you how it’s done. Close your eyes, imagine that we somehow met in high school, and let me make that memory better for you.”

  He was even trying to protect me from my painful memories? Was I sure that Finn was real? Because he was seriously so damn perfect.

  “You want to take my fake virginity?” I asked breathlessly.

  “I want to take all of you,” he moved my legs to position himself, “Now close your eyes, Jules.”

  And I did.

  Chapter Eleven

  “Oh, Finn. Fuck!” I quietly cried out, clutching onto the man that I loved so much that it hurt.

  Our releases met each other head on and I couldn’t catch my breath, my eyes rolling back at the sensation of being filled by Finn’s orgasm. He pulled out and collapsed next to me, gasping for air.

  “Holy shit,” he breathed, his hand on his chest, “That was so much better than my first time.”

  I nodded, no words able to pass through my lips as I panted. Finn shifted onto his side and watched me closely.

  “Did I do a good job at taking your virginity a second time?” There was hopefulness in his voice.

  My head turned so I could look at him, “You did way better than good. I don’t think the dots in my vision are ever going to go away after that orgasm.”

  Even though we had taken it soft and slow, it still led to one of the most intense orgasms of our relationship. The way Finn gazed down at me, all the love in the world in his eyes, made it feel like we were the only two people alive. If I had to go with a cliché, it felt like when two main characters of a movie who were madly in love, finally shared their first kiss with one another.

  Finn chuckled and kissed my forehead, “I’m glad that I made you feel good. Because I feel pretty damn good myself.”

  “You never told me about your first time,” I said quietly, suddenly nervous to actually find out.

  He brushed my hair from my face, “She was nothing like you. But we were sixteen and had been dating her since freshman year. I was on the soccer team; a so-called jock and she was fresh onto the cheerleading squad, so everyone kind of pushed us to be together. At the time, I thought we had a lot in common. We liked the same restaurants, watched some of the same tv shows. You know, naïve teenage boy stuff. She was pretty so that kind of fed into the angsty hormones.”

  When the back of his fingers ran against my cheek, I closed my eyes at the feeling. It always made me feel so loved.

  “Please don’t tell me you had your first time right here,” I tried to sound playful.

  “We actually had it at her house. Luckily, I had somewhat of an idea of what to do. With two older brothers who are willing to give you the sex talk and answer your detailed questions, it was kind of hard to go wrong. She cried the entire time. I couldn’t tell if I was hurting her or she was happy.” He chuckled to himself and shook his head.

  “Did you guys breakup after that?”

  “No, we dated all the way to graduation.”

  Well, this was news to me.

  “Then why aren’t you still with her?” I pursed my lips.

  “We wanted different things in life,” Finn pulled the blankets further up our bodies.

  “Like what?”

  He sighed, it was something he didn’t want to talk about, but he knew he had to. If we were to spend the rest of our lives together, we had to know everything about one another.

  “She wanted to settle down and have kids nearly right away after we graduated high school. I was eighteen, only dated one girl my whole life, and wanted to pursue my love of soccer and sports. Besides, during the last year of our relationship, I realized that we were growing into different people. The things that I thought we had in common when we started dating, we no longer had in common. I couldn’t see myself spending my life with her, so I broke it off after we graduated.”

  “Sounds harsh,” I wondered aloud.

  “I guess it was. But it all led me to you in the end, so I can’t complain too much,” he kissed my lips tenderly.

  “Still have that cheesiness in you, I see,” I giggled against his lips.

  “Only comes out for you,” he shifted atop me and deepened our kiss.

  Then we started making love all over again.

  My eyes opened to a room that was not the guest room. The walls were blue, the comforter I held against my naked body was light blue, and many soccer trophies lined the shelves on the walls. A strong muscular arm was wrapped around my waist, I had slept all night with Finn. His mother would fucking lose it if she caught us.

  “Shit,” I said sitting up quickly, hugging the comforter against my chest.

  “What’s wrong?” Finn said quickly from beside me, but he refused to get up.

  “Finn, I’m supposed to be in the guest room,” I looked down at him. Why wasn’t he worried?

  He glanced at the clock on his bedside table before looking at me, “She won’t be up for a few more hours, baby. Besides, it’s my birthday and I want my fiancée in my bed with me.”

  He playfully pulled me back to lay down with him. He laid on his side to look at me while I laid on my side to look at him. I put my hand on his cheek, his stubble tickling my palm as he leaned into my touch.

  “Happy birthday, baby,” I kissed his lips softly.

  “I think I get twenty-six birthday kisses,” he smiled, his boyish grin was heart stopping.

  “Well, now you’re down to twenty-five,” I grinned.

  Finn grabbed my top
leg and hooked it over his waist, “How about twenty-five birthday thrusts then?”

  “Think you can make me come in twenty-five?” I raised an eyebrow, giving him a challenge sounded like fun.

  “Let’s find out,” he said, thrusting his cock hard into me, “One.”

  It only took twenty-four of Finn’s thrusts to make me come, his last thrust was when his release came. Now, since we still had over an hour before his mother was going to be waking up, we were taking a shower together in the bathroom that was attached to his room. Watching the water cascade over his sculpted body was making me all hot and bothered again. Damn, why did he have to be so attractive?

  “So, now that you’ve had birthday sex, that means you don’t get any more until next year…right?” I teased as he rinsed the conditioner from my hair for me.

  “If you make me wait a year for sex, I’m pretty sure I would die,” he laughed, kissing my neck as my head leaned back into the water.

  “You wouldn’t get it only once a year. You’d get it on my birthday, our anniversary, and if you’re a good boy, maybe even Christmas.”

  “I guess I’ll just have to take all that I can get today then,” he smiled against my skin and turned me around, my back pressing against the cool tile away from the shower head.

  I wrapped my arms around his neck as I hooked a leg around his waist and he easily slipped his cock into me.

  “I feel like it’s my birthday almost,” I groaned as he started setting a slow pace.

  “And why’s that?” He smiled as he grabbed my ass.

  “Because you’re fucking me, and your cock fills me up so much,” I brought his lips down to mine.

  Finn moaned and lifted my other leg around his waist as he held me up, my back still against the wall. I was almost worried I’d slip, but Finn had one arm around my waist, keeping me steady.

  “You like when I talk dirty to you, don’t you?” I said seductively, my breathing getting heavy with every thrust that was coming to me.

  “It’s so fucking hot,” Finn bit down on my shoulder.

  He moved slightly and started an unrelenting pace of pounding thrusts. Our wet bodies making a sound every time they connected.

  “Shit, Finn…right there,” I gripped onto him as best I could with the water washing over us.

  The bathrooom door swung open, “Finn Walker McAllister have you been having sex in my house? Oh my god!”

  His mother’s piercing voice filled the room as she walked in on us. Now was the time I wished that Finn’s bathtub had an actual shower curtain to cover those taking a shower, and not the frosted glass sliding doors.

  “Shit, mom!” Finn put me down and pulled out of me as I buried my face in my hands in embarrassment.

  She started screaming things I couldn’t understand over Finn trying to tell her to get out of the bathroom. All I knew was that she was refusing. Finn hastily turned off the water and slid the door open far enough to grab our towels. He wrapped his around his waist as I wrapped mine around my body, clutching it to me like a security blanket. Finally, he slid the door all the way open and standing right there in the middle of the steamed-up bathroom was his mother in her fluffy bathrobe holding the unused condom in her hand. Well, fuck.

  “Finn McAllister, you have some explaining to do,” his mother said sternly.

  “I’m pretty sure the thing in your hand does all of the explaining for me,” he sighed as he wrapped his arm around my shoulders and pulled me closer to him. I buried my face in his neck.

  “You are not supposed to have sex until you are married, young man.”

  “Mom, seriously? I’m twenty-six years old. I am a grown man and can have sex whenever I want.”

  Finn was a true momma’s boy and to hear him talk like this to her, it hurt. He loved her so much, but he also loved me. They needed to have this conversation in private. Not while I was standing with her son in the shower with only a towel to cover me. Especially not after we were just caught having sex in that very same shower. I took a step back from Finn.

  “I’m going to go back to the guest bedroom. I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to ruin your birthday…” I quickly stepped out of the bathtub and ran past his mother.

  I heard Finn’s voice before I finally made it out of his room, “Look what you did, Mom.”

  Before I even got my hand on the doorknob to the room I was supposed to be sleeping in, Finn came jogging towards me down the hallway, holding onto the towel around his waist.

  “Julianna, baby, stop,” he quietly demanded.

  I turned to face him, “Finn, maybe I should head back home. I shouldn’t have come. I just caused a rift between you and your mom and it breaks my heart. All because you were showing me how much you loved me.”

  “Is that what the sex was about to you?” His mother asked harshly from his doorway.

  I swallowed hard, “Ma’am, I really am sorry. I love Finn, so very much. I want to spend the rest of my life with him. I want to have children with him. What you saw us doing, that’s how Finn tells me he loves me in a way that words can’t express…”

  Looking back at Finn, all I could see was love in his eyes, “I’m sorry, Finn…”

  I kissed his cheek softly and went into the guest room, closing the door behind me.

  “Seriously, Mom? It is my fucking birthday and I can spend it however I want. I wanted to spend it with my fiancée and I wanted to spend it with my family, but now I have to pick between the two all because you won’t move out of your medieval ways. For your information, Ashton and Cooper both fucked their wives well before they were married. Hell, we were all screwing girls when we were in high school! This is the worst birthday ever!” I heard him walk to his room and slam the door shut.

  My body slid down to the floor, my head in my hands. I should have listened to my gut this morning and snuck back here. As I got dressed, I heard Finn’s mother tell him that she was going to Ashton’s to help set up for the party. If he responded I didn’t hear it. A short while later, I heard a door open and close. Buttoning up my jeans, I decided to go find Finn. It was my fault that this had turned into the worst birthday ever. I put my hair in a braid and walked to Finn’s room, but the door was open.

  “Finn? Baby, are you in here?” I asked into the empty room as I walked through it to the bathroom.

  The unopened condom sat on the bathroom vanity. Where in the world could he be? I went downstairs and searched the living room then the kitchen. It was the faint creak of the porch swing that told me where he was: his thinking place. I opened the door and stepped onto the porch. Sure enough, there he sat, lightly swinging.

  “You know, I’m gonna start calling you Winnie the Pooh if you keep coming to this thinking place,” I said softly as my lips turned into a small smile.

  He returned my smile before tapping his chin like Winnie the Pooh does in his thinking spot, “Think. Think. Think.”

  Giggling, I sat on his lap, “Ah, finally a man who can quote Winnie the Pooh to me.”

  “I’d quote anything just to see you smile,” he kissed my shoulder as I leaned against him.

  “I’m sorry I made you have the worst birthday ever,” I said quietly, my hands covering his as they wrapped around my waist.

  “You didn’t do anything wrong. It was perfect until my mom barged in,” he nuzzled his nose into my damp hair that smelt like his conditioner.

  “Still, I should have been in the guest room. But I just can’t seem to resist your sex god ways,” I ran my hands up and down his arms, my ring dragging against his skin.

  He chuckled before he squeezed his arms gently around me, “I’m happy you can’t resist me.”

  “Me too. Now, what brought you to your thinking spot, Winnie?” I looked back at him.

  He sighed, “What we can do to make this day better.”

  “If you are suggesting sex, Finn, that is a terrible idea. It’s what got us in trouble in the first place.”

  “I’m not suggesting sex, Jul
ianna.”

  “Then what is your suggestion?” I shifted off his lap, laying my legs across where I had just left.

  We needed to be able to look at each other as we talked this through. I would do just about anything to make his day better. He took a second to think as he ran his hand up and down my legs as they rested on his lap.

  “Marry me.”

  I chuckled, “Babe, I already said I would marry you…hence why I’m wearing the ring you gave me.” I held up my hand to show him.

  He smiled and took my hand, looking at the ring, “I mean, really marry me, Julianna. Let’s go to the courthouse right now and get married.”

  My mouth fell open in shock, it took me a few seconds to process what he said.

  “Seriously? You want to just run to the courthouse and get married? We don’t even have a marriage license.”

  “I looked it up online. We can apply at the courthouse here in town and they’ll hand it right to us. Then we can walk over and get married.”

  He looked up this information? When?

  “What about my family? I know they would want to be at the wedding…” I said sadly. My family was so important to me.

  “We will have a big reception and invite your entire family. That way they can celebrate with us.”

  “And the rings, Mr. I have an answer for everything?”

  He kissed my lips after my sassy remark, “There’s a little jewelry shop on the way to the courthouse.”

  I looked up at him, he really wanted to do this. And me? I really wanted to marry him.

  “But my mom…” I started.

  Finn brought my hand to his lips, “Call her. Get her opinion. If she is against this, then we won’t do it.”

  I nodded, “Okay, let me go call her.”

  Leaving Finn in his thinking place, I went back up to the guest room and made the call.

  “Hey honey, how’s it going?” My mother asked me once she picked up.

  “I have something I need to ask you about,” I was just gonna cut right to the chase, no time for idle chit chat.