Tomorrows Child

by Starr West

  I pushed my way through a curtain of shadows and woke as the light was fading through the window of Phoenix’s room. Phoenix was no longer sitting on the side of the bed. The moisture of the mist lingered and the presence of the goddess hung heavy in the air, but it had been a dream. I had not controlled the outcome of my vision; my intention had slipped and fear had overcome me.

  I wouldn’t tell the others. I had to trust that everything would turn out exactly as destiny intended. If my magick remained bound, nothing would change. If it worked, I would deal with that. If it killed me, they could bury me beside my mother.

  I returned to a house full of women and went to my room without a word. Hours later, Libby came to wake me. A simple white dress lay on the end of my bed. I knew the plan from here. The women would lead me to Tahinah’s moon bath to purify my body and my mind, and then I would dress in the simple white gown. Phoenix would take me to the sacred space in the forest where the ritual was scheduled and then he would leave.

  The women led me through the forest from Libby’s to the bathtub on the bank of the creek. Trinity lingered when the others left, I knew she was inspecting my “strange aura.” The corners of her mouth lifted slightly, though it wasn’t a real smile; she was acknowledging something.

  The lonely bath had been transformed into something beautiful and surreal. Cheesecloth hung in drapes from a bamboo frame and formed translucent walls. Dozens of candles surrounded the tub and lit the small room, casting eerie shadows against the drapes. My eyes watered from the heavy scent of jasmine that perfumed the air and floated on the steam and mist, which filled the room. Thinking about the bathing part of the ritual had made me nervous. The idea of standing naked and exposed had terrified me, but now I was relaxed and calm. I undressed and lowered my naked body into the milky hot water. Libby had fashioned a tiny pillow from a piece of raw silk filled with oats and fragrant herbs. I rubbed my skin until it prickled and turned pink. Then I held my breath and slipped beneath the surface of the water. This was the beginning of the ritual, designed to purify and consecrate. As I slipped on the white dress, I felt like a sacrificial virgin.

  Phoenix was the only one waiting when I walked from the bathroom. I was hot and flushed from the water, but blushed anyway as soon as Phoenix turned and reached for my hand. He was wearing jeans and a t-shirt as he would any other day and I felt silly and over-dressed.

  “You look beautiful.”

  We walked into a clearing in the forest between the houses. In the darkness, it was difficult to see the circle in the centre where the women stood, but I heard Emily singing long before we arrived. With all my wandering and getting lost, I had never stumbled upon this clearing. A circle in the centre was illuminated with candles that created a dreamlike glow in the dark forest. Four stone pillars stood at each corner; all were less than a metre tall and carved with a symbol representing each of the elements: Water. Air. Fire. Earth.

  Phoenix still held my hand, and I didn’t want to let him go, but he pulled his hand free, kissed me lightly on the lips and pushed me gently into the circle. I stumbled slightly, tripping on willow branches that covered the ground. They were green and soft; a welcome comfort for my bare feet.

  I took a deep breath, tasting Phoenix’s sweet kiss on my lips and waited.

  ~~~

  With no moon in the sky, the candles cast little light into the impenetrable darkness, but it was enough to see within the bounds of the small circle. I was afraid. I knew I could trust these women, but my throat sang out for liquid and my lips stuck together, begging for water. My heart thumped in my chest and sweat beaded on my forehead.

  “Just breathe, Psyche,” someone whispered.

  Emily continued to sing a soft haunting song. In front of me lay the doll, my beautiful Butterfly, bound in pretty rainbow thread still smiling, totally unaware that this was her final moment. I felt sorrow for her now, but not enough to save her. Beside her sat a large sooty pot, the black candle stood tall in the centre and partly submerged; clear water lapping against its waxy sides. The candle remained unlit. Emily’s song faded and the women called to the goddess, their voices echoing in the darkness. Trinity lit the black candle.

  Persephone, Goddess of the afterlife, Goddess of the spring

  We call upon thee, Great Goddess Persephone

  Oh gracious Goddess, day and night

  Great Goddess of Death and Life

  Three times, they spoke the call to the goddess.

  I felt the air change, sparkle with light and coalesce into the figure of a woman.

  Protect this child with all your might

  See her safe through day and night

  Three times, they asked for my protection.

  Thrice around the circle bound

  Return this binding to the ground

  Unbind the magick, set it free

  Let this girl go graciously

  Three times, they requested the unbinding.

  Slowly, slowly let it flow

  Slowly let her magick grow

  However, they chanted the final verse repeatedly until it became a haunting monotone hymn. The goddess stood there; her expression was unreadable, but her eyes glistened. Tears ran freely down my face. I didn’t know why I was crying, but I couldn’t stop.

  Persephone raised her hand and the doll rose into the air and stopped just above my head. She twisted her hand, and the doll spun into a blur of colour, while the rainbow cord began to unravel. The doll and the cord stopped, suspended in midair for a moment, before falling to the ground. The black candle spluttered in the darkness as the flame reached the water and then flickered and died.

  Persephone looked toward the doll lying at my feet and once again raised her hands. The doll and the cord rose, now separate, high above our heads and stopped. The goddess flicked her fingers again and the doll shattered into a million pieces of light and dust raining down within the circle. Tiny butterflies flittered amongst the glitter and then came together as one. The butterfly glistened in colours of rainbow brilliance against the darkness of the night. I lifted my hand, let the butterfly land on my palm, and thought about the dreams and wishes that she safely held inside. I smiled at the memories and the butterfly once again became tiny sparks of glitter that filled the air.

  The goddess didn’t speak and the chanting women had grown silent. I felt no different. Light-headed maybe, but the sweating had subsided and my heart was beating normally, I was feeling surprisingly fine. The goddess stood before me and reached for my hand. She appeared to have more substance now, and was surrounded by an ethereal glow. She wasn’t normal, at least not by human standards, but her hand felt real. With my hand in hers, she led me out of the circle and away from the women.

  As we walked, the light changed and was replaced with an iridescent blue radiance that didn’t come from the sky, but from the goddess. I knew we were no longer in the clearing near the circle or in the forest between the houses, but somewhere else, somewhere between the place called “home” and where the goddess dwelled.

  The goddess seemed to relax outside the confines of the circle and spoke for the first time. “You are a brave one, Psyche. You could have kept the magick bound, you know. Let’s hope you do not live to regret this day.”

  This was unexpected, a conversation with Persephone. A goddess was holding my hand and speaking my name, and my tiny mind found no words to say as she continued.

  “You have a difficult time ahead of you. The magick is powerful, but it’s a gift for you to command.”

  “But how do I do that? I don’t even understand what the gift is. No one seems to know.”

  “I understand this, but you will, in time. Only you can learn how special your magick is and how to use this blessing. This is something no one else can teach you.”

  “But I don’t feel any different; it’s as if nothing has changed.”

  “While I am here, I will keep the magick at bay. I will keep you safe. I will do what I can, but you must learn abo
ut its power… in your own way. No one can help you with this.” She turned and took both my hands in hers, “Our time is limited, Psyche, and I can only slow the flow of magick for a short time. If I do too much, I will have interfered, which is forbidden.

  “I don’t have the power to change these things, but you must know that this magick will kill you if you don’t learn quickly. Command the power before it controls you.”

  “But how? I don’t know the first thing about magick; I didn’t even want the magick.”

  Persephone smiled then. “But you did. We all make choices, Psyche. This is your life and these are your choices. The magick is your destiny. You only ever receive as much as you can tolerate. Stay strong, Psyche.”

  Within a blink, we were back at the circle, and the blue glow was replaced with the golden light of the candles. The smell of burnt wick hit my nostrils as each candle was extinguished, one by one.

  “Take care of the child, dear ones, she is more precious than you know.” Persephone leant down and placed a kiss on my forehead. “Remember, you have until the full moon. Learn fast, Psyche, your life depends on it.” And in those final words, Persephone left as she arrived. Sparkles of light spiralled high into the night sky and vanished.

  Chapter 23 ~ A MAGICAL EARTH

  The weeks following the unbinding were horrendous. The magick didn’t arrive in a rush as Tahinah expected and it didn’t kill me or at least, it hadn’t yet. What did happen was as amazing as it was horrendous. I began to absorb energy.

  I knew that everything contained energy. Mum told me, Phoenix told me, Libby told me, even science told me that, but now I could feel it pulsing through the earth beneath my feet. I felt the living energy in the trees and the plants in the garden. I felt life pulsating within rocks and stones, and I felt it flow and crackle in the air and arrive on the breeze.

  At first, it was subtle and slow. I only felt a slight warmth and a gentle hum surrounding me. When I walked barefoot in the garden I felt alive, I felt connected. I loved it and I wanted more, but the humming became a constant thump like the heartbeat of the earth. It was amazing, but it wouldn’t go away. It grew stronger and louder as the days passed. It became intolerable, but that was the least of it - the noise was the most bearable.

  As I walked, I absorbed energy from the earth. It flowed freely in the air and was there for everyone, but I was like a sponge, sucking energy from the air with every breath. My senses grew acute until I could hear everything, see everything, feel everything. There was no peace and no respite. As the moon waxed, the energy grew; and with the arrival of the full moon, the energy was at its zenith. The moon always sent her energy to the earth every month, and this grand influx of energy was more than my mortal body could handle. Persephone had warned me. She told me it would kill me and that only I could figure out the secret to my magick. She warned me the days surrounding the full moon would be the most difficult.

  “Psyche, you must learn about the power of your magick,” she said, “and when you’ve worked that out, you must learn to use it and command it.” The goddess was kind and gentle, but her advice was of little help as I continued drawing the energy from everywhere.

  Phoenix wiped my tears and held my hand. When my body trembled, he held me in his arms. He was my calm in the midst of a raging storm, but the pain was so real, too real.

  At midnight, on the night of the full moon, Phoenix carried me to the circle. The women were already there, holding hands. I could see Persephone and someone else, the faint outline of a woman standing between earth and the spirit world - my mother. The haunting voice of Emily resonated through the forest as she sang a song of blessing to the goddess. The moonlight shone in the circle and I felt the familiar rush of warmth as another massive dose of energy imbued me.

  Phoenix sat me in the centre of the circle. Each woman laid one hand on me and the other on the person next to her. Persephone stood at the head of the circle, with my mother beside her. She reached for Phoenix and the trio linked their arms in solidarity.

  “We thank you for this gift and release the energy, returning it to you, our mother,” Libby spoke and Emily continued to sing a whispered, haunting hymn. I felt the energy seep into me. In the safety of the circle and the presence of the goddess, I thought that I would be safe, but I still absorbed energy.

  Slowly, I felt the energy surge out of me and into the women that formed the circle. It gushed and sounded as if wind were rushing through a tunnel, and sparks crackled in the air. When the energy reached Phoenix, Celeste and Persephone, they raised their arms and the power returned to the moon in a conduit of light and sparks.

  For the first time in weeks, I felt calm. Persephone smiled. “I warned you, Psyche. This is a powerful gift you have. You must learn to control it. Next time you might not be so lucky.”

  Persephone squeezed a plump pomegranate, forcing several seeds to fall into her palm while the thick, red juice ran into a cup. She handed me the crimson seeds she held in her hand. “The earth is your mother and life is her gift,” she said and I swallowed the seeds. Then she handed me the cup and I drank as she said, “The blood of life flows in all our veins.” It wasn’t blood, but the juice was sweet and tangy. “As your heart beats, so does the heart of our mother.” She took my hands in hers, “This is my gift to you, Psyche. We are united. Find the strength and the wisdom to use the magick and you will discover the mystery of these gifts.”

  Celeste smiled then, only a hint of sorrow in her eyes, but she said nothing. She clung to Persephone’s hand and together, they faded into the night.

  ~~~

  The serenity didn’t last and the energy absorption returned, but this time I worked harder to control it. When I first began to absorb the energy, I wasn’t prepared, I didn’t know what was happening or what to expect. I did now. I also realised that I now had all the answers I needed.

  I knew how to ground the energy. It was one of Libby’s first lessons. But before, when I stood barefoot in the garden or the forest, or when I buried my hands in the earth in a vain effort to return the energy back to the earth, I was unfocused. My intention was turned inward; it was all about me, how I was going to cope, how crazy this all was and a million other thoughts that had no place in my head.

  Today I stood where our garden met the forest, beneath the largest of the ancient guardians and I found my quiet place. That simple space in my mind where peace existed, the same place I found with Phoenix on my first visit to the forest all those months ago.

  “I thank you for this gift and will use it wisely, but today I return this energy as my gift to the earth.” It was a simple statement, but I felt the energy seep slowly back into the earth, crackle from my fingers and return to the air. Finally, in the shadow of the forest, I had found a way to live with my magick.

  All I had to do now was work out what on earth, I was supposed to do with this amazing gift!

  Chapter 24 ~ A GIFT FROM A HEDGEWITCH

  Accepting that magick was part of my life, part of me, was a relief. Resisting had made everything far worse and more dramatic than it needed to be. The heavy load of opposition I once carried was lifted. There remained many unanswered questions and the future was clouded by a prophecy that I hadn’t yet received. And there were more secrets.

  Secrets I needed to learn if I were to unravel the mysteries of my gift. There was a lot of discussion and much conjecture, but no one really knew what to expect. My conversation with the goddess didn’t provide the answers, and I knew that I had to figure this out on my own. While everyone argued about the nature of the gift, I spent time alone, reading the Darnell “Book of Family Secrets,” which I’d renamed to reflect what it really was. A book of secrets.

  The book began with the Darnell family prophecy, which named me as the ninth daughter, the last daughter. Scattered throughout, however, were prophecies to the other daughters. Prophecies that other Darnell women received to direct their personal journeys. Some had gotten just one, while others had
received many. Each one represented a small step toward a common goal, although still unknown, and all were preparing for the arrival of the ninth daughter. Me.

  Setting up life in this remote northern town had been part of the prophecy. Each daughter set the stage for the one who followed her. Each daughter continued to obey the words written in the book of secrets. My plan was to read all of their prophecies, for if I knew what they knew, I might learn what was expected of me. And knowing this, I could work out how to use the magick. At least that was my theory.

  The first daughter who was given the prophecy wrote it down. This was challenging in a time when people were uneducated and books were only for the rich. Although the persecution of witches had officially ended, it didn’t mean that it was actually over. Religious zealots were everywhere and all too ready to execute their own form of punishment in the name of God.

  Mary Catherine, the first daughter, learned to read and write, while memorising the prophecy. She acquired the book and hid it until she could pass it on to her own daughter. But after the book was found by her husband, Mary Catherine was shunned by the community.

  She lived the life of a hedge witch on the outskirts of the town. Here, she had the time and the resources to hone her skills and acquire a working knowledge of herbs. So Mary Catherine passed her knowledge of herbs and other skills down to her daughter.

  Her daughter, repentant of her mother’s sins, attended church regularly and ran Sunday school for the local children. She was the true pretender. Her prophecy required her to raise the third daughter with the knowledge of the lore of the herb. Many of Libby’s remedies come from this information, which was recorded faithfully by the second daughter.