A Love Shared

by Chrissie Loveday

  “Oh yes, and which secretary would that be? I share Poppy and Chloe with at least four other people. They simply don’t have time for it. I don’t have my own personal Julia to do all these tasks for me.” She felt herself going red with anger. He was allowing their personal life to come into work, she was certain. His mother must have persuaded him to stop seeing her and so he was making life difficult at the office.

  “Come on, Sarah. I have to get this practice back on its feet or we’ll have to restructure the whole thing.”

  “Perhaps you’d like me to leave? Resign, as I’m clearly incompetent in your eyes?”

  “Don’t be ridiculous. You’re good at your job and your clients are very enthusiastic about you. I’ve seen some of the letters from them, thanking you for your efforts.”

  “Then you’ll surely realise I can only do the job properly if I have the time to spend on it.”

  Alex’s mobile rang. “Excuse me. Yes, all right. Wait a moment. I’m sorry, I need to deal with this. We’ll speak later.”

  “Don’t bother. Oh I’ll be over this evening to collect Major. It’s time he was back in his own paddock.”

  “Sarah. Don’t storm off like that. I’ll speak to you later.” But she had gone. He spoke into his mobile again. “Mother. What’s wrong this time? I am at work and extremely busy.”

  Sarah sat at her desk fuming. She felt a mixture of anger, tempered with sadness. She felt her professional integrity was being questioned and her personal life was also taking a severe dip. The past months since Alex had entered her life, there had been so many happy times spent together.

  She had enjoyed working on the Manor with him. They had spent time browsing round shops and choosing things that she had loved. The entire lounge was based almost entirely on her choices, as if it were being done for her . . . or at least that’s what she might have allowed herself to dream about. They had started to make plans for some of the other rooms before Mrs Weston had come on the scene and spoilt everything. She forced herself back to her work and half-heartedly dictated a letter into her machine.

  Her phone buzzed.

  “Are you free, Sarah? We need to finish our discussion.” Alex sounded brusque.

  “I’m not sure there is anything more to say.”

  “I can’t leave it like this. I need to go through a few specific things with you.”

  “All right. Five minutes. I have a letter to finish.” She dreaded another encounter and wanted a few moments to compose herself. The letter had been a fiction as she had already finished it. She was pondering over the dilemma she felt surrounding her.

  Mixing business and pleasure was the mistake everyone supposed. Though they had mostly kept work and personal life totally separate, she felt certain that his obsession with her targets was as a result of his mother’s influence on him. The woman wanted her out of Alex’s life and the situation was making it difficult for her to work with him.

  She made up her mind to seek another position but it would not be easy in this part of the world. Maybe she should transfer to another branch or maybe she should leave Cornwall altogether and make a new start. She drew in her breath to compose herself. Why should she? She loved living here. There was nowhere else she wanted to live. She walked along the corridor to Alex’s office, her head held high.

  “Come in,” Alex called in response to her knock. She saw her last time sheet spread on his desk and felt her heart sink. Horrible thing. “I was looking through your various accounts and the clients you’ve seen. I have to say, you are spending much longer per client than I would have expected. And your charging rates don’t always match the time you’re spending with them.

  “It needs tightening up. For instance, this Mr Knowles you’ve been working with. I see you have spent something over two hours with him during the past months, but I can’t find a billing for two hours. Just one for one hour.” Sarah froze, partly in anger, partly in total shock.

  “You’re seriously telling me you have the time to go through each client, for each member of staff and marry together hours and billing?”

  “Of course not. I have an internal audit clerk who does it.”

  “Oh really. And what sort of salary does he or she get?”

  “Enough to justify the appointment.”

  “And you’re doing this for everyone? Not just me?”

  “Eventually, yes. I picked on your account because you were so very far away from your target. I needed to see why.”

  “But I thought I’d explained that my workload does not merit the target you set. It isn’t a matter of pushing pieces of paper around like conveyancing or probate matters. These are real people with massive problems. Traumas, even. I have to spend a bit of extra time with them simply to allow them space and time to speak openly. I have to form a relationship with them before they can truly open up.

  “As for Mr Knowles, I’m trying to sort out the mess another solicitor made of his divorce settlement. Poor man was totally taken to the cleaners by his ex-wife’s solicitor and badly advised by his own. He’s now eligible for legal funding so I shall get that sorted immediately.”

  “I sympathise with all of that. But you know, we also have to minimise the number of clients with legal support. They are of course, less profitable. But the fact remains, we can’t afford to carry any member of staff who isn’t performing properly.”

  “I see. So you’d like me to resign? Or perhaps I can transfer to one of the other branches?”

  “Don’t be ridiculous. All I need is for you to become more realistic about what you are doing. Please, Sarah,” his voice softened, “try to understand the position I’m in.”

  She rose from her seat and walked to the door. She did not want to hand in her resignation but was very close to it. How on earth could she have considered even liking this man, let alone thinking, of the possibility of anything more? She paused and drew in her breath, desperately trying to control what she said.

  “This isn’t about work, is it? It’s nothing to do with my wretched targets or time sheets or anything else. It’s your precious mother. Mummy, dear. She doesn’t approve of me and the fact we’ve spent so much time together. She wants you to make a suitable match in the County Set and I’m getting in the way. Don’t worry. I’ll collect Major later and be out of your and her way.”

  She stormed out of his office, ignoring his voice calling after her. She collected her briefcase and went out to her car. “I have to leave early,” she told the receptionist.

  She drove away from Truro, desperate to put distance between herself and Alex. He’d be at his desk for hours longer. She hoped he was putting everyone else through the same interrogation as her but sensed he wouldn’t. She drove to a quiet stretch of beach and parked.

  Dressed in her business suit and high heels, walking along the sand was impossible. She kicked off her shoes, tugged down her tights and walked barefoot down the wooden steps to the beach. There were a few dogs running wildly along the beach, dashing in and out of the sea while the owners stood chatting.

  She went to the edge of the sea and allowed the waves to lap over her feet. It was freezing but somehow it was also cleansing. Washing away her anger. She had probably burnt her boats with the man, she had to admit, she was beginning to care for. Was, she told herself. He was so unreasonable and didn’t even listen to what she was saying. All the good intentions he had suggested when he first arrived had come to nothing. An interview room for starters? Where had that idea gone?

  She wandered back up the beach to her car and drove home barefoot. The heap of wet sand that collected under the pedals would have to be cleaned out later. She usually hated a dirty car and was obsessive about keeping it tidy, but she cared about nothing in her present mood. She drove home, wishing she could go for a ride and clear her head. She made tea and sat on the back step to drink it, still barefoot and still wearing a now crumpled business suit.

  Sarah cooked herself a piece of chicken with some stir fry veget
ables she had in the freezer and sat down to watch the news. An item on horses reminded her that she had suggested she would collect Major that evening. It was too late now.

  She needed to organise a lift over to Darnley Manor and then to ride him back. It would be dark before she could manage it all. It would have to wait till the morning. Alex and Moonlight could have the pleasure of his company for one more night.

  Perhaps Joe would be around the next day and would oblige. She knew Alex would once have insisted on being available, but under the present circumstances, she would never ask him for any sort of favour. When her phone rang, she jumped. She rushed over to it, hoping, she realised that it might be Alex with some sort of apology. Not that she expected it, of course. It was her mother.

  “Hello, darling. How are you?” she asked.

  “Oh, you know. End of a difficult week.”

  “Is everything all right, Sarah?” she asked anxiously.

  “Course it is,” Sarah lied. Any hint of a problem and her mother would rush down. “Don’t worry, Mum. I’m just tired and it really has been a difficult week.” She opened up just a little about a new boss who was very demanding.

  “And how’s Major?”

  “He’s fine. I’m meeting up with the old crowd on Sunday and we’re going for a cross country hack. Lunch somewhere. You know.”

  “That’s nice, dear. Now, Dad and I were wondering if you’d be able to come home next weekend? We really need to decide what to do for your birthday. It’s a big one this year and we should celebrate properly. We thought of a party or maybe a dinner for you. What do you think?”

  “Oh that’s really sweet of you. But I don’t want a fuss. It’s bad enough being nearly thirty. I don’t find it necessary to let the entire world know.”

  “Come home anyway, darling. I was going to suggest you drive up tomorrow but you have plans so let’s make it next weekend. Beth and the kids can come over on the Sunday and we can talk through ideas. She was getting quite carried away, but I said no. You wouldn’t want any of the things she was suggesting.”

  “All right, Mum. I’ll drive up Saturday afternoon after I’ve had a morning ride.”

  “Excellent. We’ll take you out for dinner in Saturday. There’s a lovely new place just opened and your dad’s keen to support them. Nice young couple. Bring something half decent to wear, not your usual scruffy jeans.”

  Sarah laughed. It was good to have a loving family around, even if they could be a pain at times. But they always meant well and wanted only the best for her.

  Somehow, she needed to avoid speaking about her problems at work and the reasons behind them. She settled down again and flicked across the various channels. There was really nothing that interested her. Perhaps she should go and get a DVD from the rental shop in the village. She was in the mood for some sloppy romance, she decided. Something to let her forget her own lack of romance.

  She grabbed her car keys and drove down the road. She thought she saw Alex’s car pass her in the opposite direction but it was too dark to see clearly. She browsed along the racks and found something that she might enjoy, picked up a box of comfort chocolates and a bottle of wine and drove back home for her solitary evening of indulgence.

  Alex’s car was parked on the road outside her cottage. She was tempted to drive past but was afraid he would recognise her. Drat the man, she was thinking. She pulled into the small drive and got out of her car, clutching the carrier bag with her goodies. He strode up to her, still wearing his work clothes. He must only now be going home. One had to admire him for the hours he put in, she admitted grudgingly.

  “Alex. What are you doing here?”

  “Waiting for you. I saw you drive past me and hoped it was only a short journey. I was going to wait five more minutes before giving up. I did think you might be at the pub but I didn’t want to intrude. I couldn’t bear to leave things the way we did.”

  “You’d better come in. I was just getting something to watch and a bottle to share with Hugh Grant.”

  “Sounds wonderful. I don’t suppose I could be a substitute in case he’s already engaged?”

  “I’m not sure it’s a good idea after today. Besides, won’t your mother be expecting you?”

  “No. Why should she?”

  “Isn’t she still staying with you?”

  “Course not. She left on Monday morning.”

  “Oh. I thought as she phoned you at work, she must still be there.”

  “She’s been phoning me two or three times every day. Wants to know what I’m doing. Finding things wrong in her life and expecting me to sort them out. I don’t know what’s come over her. She’s always been demanding but this week, it’s been ridiculous.”

  “Isn’t it obvious? It’s me. She wants to make sure you’re not spending too much time with me. I’m not a suitable companion for you.”

  “I don’t know where this is coming from, Sarah. You hinted at it at work today but I can assure you it’s nothing to do with that. She certainly does not control my life.”

  “All the same, I’m unhappy with our situation. Mixing business and pleasure just isn’t working for me. I really do have to collect Major so I can get back to my normal routine. He’s too far away for me to see him every day and it’s all too complicated. I’ll get someone to drive me over in the morning and ride him back.”

  “If you really mean it, I’ll come and fetch you. But surely, it isn’t necessary. Besides, I think . . . no. I’ll wait till tomorrow. The vet is coming to check Moonlight in the morning. I’ll come over after that. Around ten-thirty if that’s convenient?”

  Sarah nodded. Alarm bells rang.

  “All right. Thanks. The vet? Is something wrong?”

  “Not really. She’s been off her food for a couple of days. Well, if you’re not going to offer me a glass of that wine I see poking out of your carrier, I’d better go.”

  “It’s only village shop plonk. Nothing you’d approve of, I’m sure.” His face fell and she softened. “But you’re welcome to a glass if you like.”

  “Thanks. It’s been a pig of a week.”

  “You’re not kidding. But, I don’t want to talk about work or I’ll end up yelling at you.”

  “OK. So what film are you watching tonight?”

  “It’s a slushy romance. I’m sure you’d hate it. Besides, I don’t suppose you’ve eaten and I haven’t got anything exciting in the cupboard.”

  “Have you got any cheese? I’d kill for a few slices of cheese on toast.”

  Sarah grinned. “I think I might manage that. How many slices?”

  Despite their awful row, it was a companionable evening. The film was amusing as well as sloppy and he seemed to enjoy it, even if he did fall asleep during the middle of it. He got up to leave soon after ten o’clock. He looked as if he was about to say something but changed his mind and gave her cheek a friendly peck.

  “See you in the morning.”

  “Fine. Thanks.” She watched as he drove away. She went inside and poured out the last glass of wine. She sat staring at her television, contemplating the day and the evening. How could Alex be two such different people?

  She could hardly believe they had just spent a companionable evening together, when just a few hours earlier she was planning to change her job because he was so unreasonable. And she had decided to hate him for ever. All the same, Major still needed to come home.

  She was ready and waiting at ten-thirty the next morning. She had dressed in her riding gear so she could ride straight back. There was no point in prolonging things by chatting and having lunch, as they had been used to doing over the past weeks. Was it really only last week that life looked promising with Alex around?

  She thought about their conversation last night. He had never properly denied that she was right about his mother and her influence. Apart from his rudeness about Prudence whatever her name was, he’d made no mention of anything. He hadn’t even apologised for failing to call her last weekend,
as he’d promised, especially after that kiss. She glanced at her watch. Ten forty-five. It was most unlike Alex to be late. Perhaps the vet had been late arriving. She was on the verge of calling him at eleven o’clock when she saw his car turning into her drive.

  “Sorry. The vet was late.” He looked excited about something.

  “I guessed as much. I hope there’s nothing wrong?”

  “No. It’s fine. I’ll tell you when we get there.”

  She stared at him as they made the short journey. But he said nothing. What on earth was wrong with him? He pulled up outside the back door.

  “Come in.”

  “I was planning to ride straight back.”

  “Later. There’s some news.” He opened the fridge and took out a bottle of champagne. “Something to celebrate.” Sarah could not think what was coming and accepted the glass he held out. Was he engaged or something? “You can’t take Major away. You see, Moonlight is in foal. Isn’t that terrific? Major is going to be a father. I knew they were keen on each other but I didn’t realise it’s a full on affair. That’s why the vet was here this morning. He confirmed it. I suspected it when she was off her food but he says there’s nothing to worry about. She’s a fit and healthy expectant mother.”

  Sarah stared at him, scarcely believing what she was hearing. She put the glass down and without even thinking, flung herself into his arms in excitement.

  “That’s terrific. Wonderful news. I’m thrilled.”

  The two dogs bounced round barking, joining in the excitement. She realised what she was doing and pulled away from Alex. But his arms held her tightly. “I’m sorry,” she said pushing him away again. “I got carried away for a moment.”

  “Don’t push me away. Sarah. Dear Sarah, I’m sorry I had to be so awful to you at work yesterday. The trouble is, I think I might be falling in love with you and it’s extremely difficult to be strict with you at work, but I have to do it. I must come over as a dreadful tyrant.”

  This time, she did extricate herself from his arms. She scarcely heard anything else he was saying. He’d said he was falling in love with her. Was it really true? Was it what she wanted? His usually cool grey eyes looked slightly misty, a softer colour all together. “Say something to me.”